"Or maybe Ah can sell ya some apple cider?" offered Applejack.
"I'll take it from here," came a voice from above.
"Who said that?"
"It's me - the Author."
"Dreadnought?"
"Yes."
"Well, howdy. Ah was just fillin' in fer ya like ya wanted."
"Yes thank you. I appreciate you taking over for a while, but fans don't just want you to try and sell them apples. They come to 'Robot Pony' for the craziness and chaos, and the last couple of chapters have been... underwhelming."
"Ah'm sorry."
"It's not your fault. Besides, I appreciate you covering for me."
"At least Ah didn't go all nuts like Fluttershy when she ran Rarity's store."
"Huh."
Applejack cocked her head. " 'Huh' ?"
"I was just thinking of how funny 'Valley-Girl Applejack' would be."
"What?"
"Or 'Goth Applejack'."
"What!"
"I need you to cover for me while I go type up a really awesome story!"
Applejack's eyes went wide. "Y'all have yer fans here at 'Robot Pony'. They want ya to write some more an' not git distracted with other stories."
"Oh, okay. I'll do that. In fact, you'll be the star of the next chapter!"
"What!"
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We won! We won! Virginia won the national championship!
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I saw the title and thought, "No, don't kill AJ just so you can beat her!"
...Witty comment has failed to load. Please try again.
This program has performed an illegal-- no, wait, that was the nineties.
An error has occurred. Would you like to send a-- no, still wrong decade.
Screw you, I'm sending the report whether you like it or not, and I'll use up all of your system resources to do so. You can have your device back in twenty minutes or so. There we go; that's more up-to-date.
9556472
Why would you think I'd kill AJ?
and here's your tip! ill be back for the cider later, you just tell me where to find it