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It is common knowledge within Canterlot Castle that Princess Celestia is rather fond of her tea, and is particularly amicable after having her first cup. Upon waking up and finding that there's no tea to be found within the castle, how does Princess Celestia react?
Not well, not well at all.
Rated T for dark humor, harsh language and false death threats.
Proof-read and edited by ChappedPenguinLips.
Cover art by LateCustomer on Deviantart.
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I find this... upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a7/HumerusFront.png/160px-HumerusFront.png
8212442
Humerous?
Me before my morning cup of coffee
8212536
> coffee
Sacrilege!
Blueblood: Slowly aims Hawkmoon at Celestia’s head.🔫
8212619
Sorry mate, that reference flew right over my head. Destiny? Or something else?
Yes it’s Destiny
8212631
I’m a PC player, so I never really got into the hype around Destiny. I heard it’s pretty good though.
It is now. it started off slow like real slow.
And that day, a new nation wide code was coined:
Code BLUE: “Celestia is out of Tea. All national resources will be redirected to remedy that within twenty minutes.”
8212651
Tea is serious business, man.
8212655
It is not hydrogen which powers the sun, but caffeine.
Well, I rather enjoyed this. I am tempted to update my headcanon for Celestia now. Either way, this is a nice little story.
Caught this:
I’m sure it should be wall.
8212681
Thanks, fixed it.
8212705
Only thing I noticed...
But I shall be looking forward to reading some of your other stuff. Not today, though.
8212727
All good, I appreciate it.
The fact that you actually wrote this story amuses me. I remember chatting about it when we were discussing that (looks around wildly) other story, eheh
8215432
That conversation is where I got the idea.
Also, no spoilers.
8215469
Yeah, it’s too bad you forgot about dumping the tea into the harbor
8215481
That's the sequel.
8215537
The start of the rebellion to overthrow Celestia’s harsh and unfair tea tax that force a tithe of all tea harvests to Celestia’s castle, laid down specifically because of this.
8215729
Thanks, this plot idea is mine now.
8215878
That is entirely fine. I couldn’t write it nearly so well.
Just make sure to give me a nod in the credits.
8212633
E
Well, destiny 2 is coming to PC, so now’s your chance! HY
8216352
I'm down for it.
I admit, this made me honestly laugh out loud. My sister probably thought me insane as well, but she knows I'm reading ponyfics, so I don't think it surprised her too terribly.
All in all, an interesting interpretation on Celestia's character, and a nice quirk to give her. I enjoyed reading this, and may continue delving into your stories for more such entertainment.
8281362
You're the 69th like, congratulations!
Also, I should note that this story was something I put very little preparation into, but it was one of the fastest stories I've ever written.
The one goal I wanted to accomplish was making Celestia say "fuck" in a reasonable situation.
The trouble with reviewing a comedy (A good comedy) is that you can't really say anything without giving away the best jokes. With that in mind, I highly recommend Celestia's Tea Conquest.
DEATH TO COFFEE!
Read the rest of the reviews here.
Snickers = Princess Celestia tea?
That was the first thing that came to mind when i got done reading this lol
So that was the origin of Day Breaker
Quite the opposite to Celestia Hates Tea.
Equal and Opposite!
Well Done!
8305730
Thank you.
8305448
She'll need more than a snickers at this rate.
TBH I like both Tea and Coffee.
(But I prefer Arizona Tea more 
)
8307194
I also like both Tea and Coffee, but I saw an opportunity for a story idea and I took it.
It would be nice to see her visit more ponies, but all in all, it was a great and funny read for morning. Pardon me, I'm going to fetch some tea myself
Love this line!
Oh, by the way, if there is only an action tag - 'opened the door' for example - preceding direct speech, there should be a period, not a comma at the end of the tag sentence.
8326234
Thank you.
8326246
You're welcome!
This was hilarious!!!
8335309
Thank you.
8335322
You're welcome
BTW, hate to bring it up, but I really hope you aren't still mad at me......
8335326
I'm don't like holding grudges, and I wasn't really that mad, just... irritated.
You have to understand it from my perspective: you asked me to take a lot of time out of my day to review your stuff so that you'd be promoted and receive more followers instead of doing it to grow as a writer. On top of that, you asked me to do it while I had already mentioned in my bio that I was on hiatus and already had a lot of work on my plate as it was. Then you edited the original comment to make it look not as bad as it initially did.
So no, it's water under the bridge, but I don't appreciate being talked to like a resource for you to use instead of a person.
8335337
..... Yeah..... Sorry.. In my head when writing that I didn't think it fully through... And I didn't read your bio... Sorry. I don't normally do.....
I was just wanting somebody to review my stories so that maybe I could end up getting featured... I would have of course put in the author's note that you reviewed it and follow you, to help you get even more followers.
Sorry for being selfish, I tend to put what I want in front of being, well, opposite.
8335347
It's fine, I promise. I am not the most bubbly person but I am not cruel.
8335353
I'm bubbly! Most of the time, anyway.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/211585/reviewers-cafe/thread/308771/reviews#comment/6052395
8347645
Thank you for taking the time to look over my story.
I expected more collateral damage... Also, Twilight should be begging forgiveness with a shipping crate full of tea bags for Celestia!
8350210
I have no doubt she'd go overboard with the apology.
I can kind of see her murdering half of Equestria before breakfast. But I always figured she added a shot of whiskey yo Irish it up too.
8212651
Shouldn't that be Code (Earl) Grey?