"Either I'm tripping balls, which is possible since I took quite a few hits... Or this is all real. And I'm a kid again. A pony one."
Max gets the unfortunate- Or fortunate experience of suddenly finding himself in Equestria as a colt after doing a lot of drugs. How will the teen turned child handle a second child hood? Will he make friends? Will he survive with his addiction to drugs?
Probably not.
(T for language, mentioning of drug usage, and sexual mentionings toward young ponies.)
Tags will be added as I go along.
Chapters (6)
6952095 I AGREE!
You have my attention.
this could be a good story, but I worry that it wont go very far seeing the track record of the stories that have hardly gone beyond the first chapter that were started by the author. I hope there will be more of this story.
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/794/773/43d.gif
Interesting... ... ... Continue!!!
This could be interesting. I will track for now but this guy is seriously messed up.
It will be rather interesting to see how this plays out, also how 'fucked up' they will think of him as a unicorn colt not knowing how to use magic and thinking it's not real. Might suggest he was under the care of abusive non unicorns, though Celestia's attention might be drawn fully onto his case when Twilight sends a letter with exactly his quoted words about the orphan care system and ponies secretly raping foals. XD
That will draw a critical inquiry perhaps Especially Luna perhaps, we are not certain. Nothing shows divine fury than others ruining the future lives/possible relationships never to be had of young foals by their hooves.
6952132 I Second that notion
I would love to see how the mane 6 are reacting to this guy from their own perspective. I wonder how long until they realize how screwed up he actually is, not what they are thinking. He is in for one heck of a rude awakening when he puts it all together, if he ever does.
Ya don goofed.
At least you don't got an STD.
6953524 Imagine the Princesses reactions? Because Twilight's sent a report certainly, Celestia the first to read it maybe using the Canterlot voice in response, Luna comes in to read the letter with Cadence and Armor close by only for Luna to expletively explode at the letter's contents.
Cadence may openly weep and think he's prone to injuring himself, perhaps X-rays may show stupid things he's likely done when high or hold trace amounts in his blood. They'll think the 'poor colt' had been sexually abused, drugged up and used like a stud for older mares. Because of his mentioning a condom. With knowing he doesn't know how to use magic, they might think the one who did it was either a Earth Pony or a Pegasus though likely more of the first when he'd say Rainbow was his first Pegasus he's seen, or maybe another species had him in a stable. (stable possibly meaning whorse house.)
6953625
I bet after Luna dream walks on him she will be the one to destroy his world view.
6953638 She may likely believe he recreated a 'world' that he felt that he had power in, or to coat over the horrible issues that were being implanted in him. like him willingly taking drugs as a human could mean he had a choice when as a foal he didn't but the image of needles or other things stay the same? Maybe guess from the reason why there were only 'bipedal' types around could be reasoned this happened in the minotaur lands, they will rationalize this as him mentally running away from the issues in his 'make believe' world. and his course language is a defense mechanism, working along the lines of victims acting out or being harsher to others not feeling safe.
Wow, congratu-fucking-lations. That Ruby, though shit right there that is. He could work for NASA with a skill set like that.
One can only imagine what fluttershy is thinking at this moment.
Can't wait for one of these humans turned foal stories to feature someone other than a social reject with no redeeming qaulities. Oh to be Old Again was kinda fun for a little while, but I can only take so much of people with sub-par IQ and a defunct moral compass. Get enough of that in the service industry as it is.
Beautiful, I haven't laughed so hard in a far amount of time!
I would follow this, but after looking at your past stories I doubt there's any chance this will be finished.
Looking forward to more of this story, looks fun.
Looking good so far. I'll see where it goes.
This seams very simular story that I have read before... From the name to the discription... Buuuuttt... I'll give it a read anyway....
... I don't know what to think, now. If I wasn't falling apart, I'd give this a read immediately but it'll have to wait till tomorrow I 'spose.
Edit: Falling ASLEEP not APART. Also on phone. Whoops, my bad.
Yes moar indeed!
I get the feeling that this nut case will never accept that he is not on a drug induced trip. Hmmm, many we could ask Discord to toy with him and make it a bad trip. Nice to see him burning bridges so fast that if sense is ever knocked into him he will truly we up a river without a paddle.
This feels familer
6954727
It's pretty much just a copy of your story with a Bruce who's into heavy drug use and doesn't have a family. No real attempts made to differentiate from the inspiration besides that this guy is a unicorn. If you like one, you'll like the other, though this is of lower technical quality (worse wording, more errors, ect.).
It may start to spin off more as it goes, but it's most likely going to be the lead being an even bigger jerk than Bruce.
By the by, how's your story coming along?
Ow, the edge.
Well, that's convenient.
And I read a chapter about a story.
Well, that's convenient.
Convenient.
Nice to know we're going there.
How convenient.
Oh, heaven forbid.
a public library.
Well isn't that nice of you.
Glad you explained that for us, instead of relying on your description of her to convey your idea.
Really? Really, really?
You think social services even get anywhere near child prostitutes?
Well that's convenient.
This story seems very... convenient. Can you see why readers might have a hard time with that?
Oh no, what ever will that magical unicorn do?
Maybe if your pupils would stop dilating so much, so your eye could have an actual color.
Didn't you land head first?
Wow, that sure is a humble opinion.
Awesome, keep up the good job.
6955346
See the comedy tag?
Edit:
6954727
*Gives Minalkra a hug filled with resolve.* It is all ok.
Oh God this is hysterical!! Can't wait for the next chapter.
Outstanding work soldier.
Amusing, but it's torture to actually read with all the errors. You need to get a proofreader ASAP.
this rewrite it a big improvement over the original, it's much easier to understand and to follow. You go more in depth about the character life and personalty and without starting to ramble on and on about asinine details that we can most certainly live not to know. You work play or turn of phrase are still a bit dull and you could use some practice to make it sound more interesting but at least you are getting better at it. the last chapter before the rewrite was a bit of an improvement over the previous chapters in describing voice tone or action of the characters.
Also try not to make your character too powerful in the beginning, having a person betting their adversaries into pummel without any sign that he has trained for months at least to get where he is now quickly gets boring to read after a while, having limits to their power in the beginning has it's merits and forces the characters to use his wits and luck to get survive a confrontation.
Also try to explain better the motives of the characters of why he does such drastic actions like intestinally go into harms way, choosing Nightmare Moon side, living the castle in a timberwolf form fully knowing that he is asking for trouble.
I how you will keep on improving with your writing on this.
Well he is now down from his trip and boy is he scared. I wonder how long he can remain clean now?
6955346 I was just about to point all of this out, especially the part about the double descriptions by his narrative and Raindbow's actions...
Is this a good story? Probably not. Is it a fun story? Hell yeah! Have a fave and a like.
6955676 Was this intended for a different story mayhaps? Because there is no Nightmare Moon in this story so far
I wonder if his human life was actually the trip... *mind blown*
6956224
6955360 A comedy tag is no excuse for bad writing.
Got to love when doctors play detective. "obviously this is intentional substance abuse," says Date Rape Drug with a self-assured nod. "There's no way this 0verly edgy foal who we expect to have been foalnapped to have been forced to ingest drugs. That's just preposterous."
Christ... this story... I want to like it, but it needs a dedicated editor to help iron out all the convenience and in general bad writing. Plus all if the grammatical and punctuation errors.
I'm gonna watch it for now, but the next chapter is gonna be the make or break for me.
6956110 That's... actually not a bad way to look at new stories. huh...
6956598
Tell that to Loony Toons. Or The Muppets.
6957022 Loony Toons is a furry franchise. I never had any respect for it (no lie). Muppets were just boring. Except for those two old guys. Those geezers were comedy gold.
Man it would take some coordination and forward planning to heroic dose LSD, Mushrooms, Salvia and DMT all at once.
This is hilarious. There are a few grammatical errors, but nothing that can't be hotfixed. You may want to look at getting a pre-reader if not an actual editor for this story, but either way I will keep reading for the humor.
6957784
Fine, then, tell it to Monty Python.
This story slightly reminds me of the game Dementium. Although I never played it, it looked really cool. I certainly like the style.