Jerry was a broken man, working at an unrewarding job, slowly losing the fight against a depression born from paternal abuse and resentment. With no surviving family or friends beyond hollow acquaintances, he turned to drink in order to dull the pain of the same routine and all its awful reminders.
In one night, lost amidst the haze of inebriation and regret, his old life was reduced to nothing more than the ashes of a bad memory. Reborn into an unfamiliar world, and with a body just as alien, how will he adapt with nowhere to call home?
Special Thanks to:
Flaming Reign (Proofreading/editing)
Hyper Atomic (For the awesome description update as well as notes and proofreading!)
Cloudy Serrano (For going back over my original chapters and doing some MUCH NEEDED editing!)
jjamess10 (For EPIC Cover Art)
Definitely an interesting story. Keep it up. I wish to read more of this story.
well done
Choo choo! here comes the MOAR train!
Very good
You should really continue this
dude.....atleast you didnt pass out like all the other stories do so soon
atleast we have a good reason for him passing out instead of a nice whack to the back of the head....
While there may be many HiEs out there very few have the human turned into a child pony so I would say that this premise is the opposite of "done to death".
Cool, that's a real cool thing you're doing, deleting reviews. Keep up with the shitty HiEs. Please, we need more of them on this site.
Dude, stop deleting reviews. You're the kind of asshat that shouldn't be allowed to post stories on this site.
why is there a password on this
First off, I apologize for deleting Mr. Ignorable's review of the story. When I saw it last night it definitely felt like a big slap to the face. I realized though that while some people may not like the story, others are the exact opposite. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I apologize to Mr. Ignorable for forgetting that. I've reopened the story and intend to continue working on it from here. Thank you for all the nice comments about the story so far everyone!
Keep up the good work. :3
Reads first chapter - I like this, let's read more!
Clicks 2nd chapter - 'enter password'
I will kill you while you sleep
Good story, looking forward to new chapters
Well done chapter
Awesome story, and creepy dream, does he have daddy issues? Anyways, I'm not sure what your talking about with Humans turned into kid ponies being done to death, personally I have only seen like 10 (am I looking in the wrong places), and most of those are pretty good.
Try this:
Suddenly I was being dragged back into the kitchen, the pain from my tail being yanked shooting up my spine.
Also
I was dragged over to the kitchen counter by my tail, my feet slipping as I tried to maintain my balance.
Sounds like he was taking the wrong meds :p
Like the story tho.
3022716
Got it! Thanks!
I like HiE fics.
Wait a minute...this guy jumped 20 yards?
I for one love this story so keep it up!
3023678 when will next chap be out
3032871
Working on it right now!
3034533 awesome speaking of which i have to work on my story to.
Great! Can't wait to see it, medic. Been eagerly awaiting each chapter. The story is so interesting to read despite how many HIE's there already is.
The problem with many HiE stories is that they're poorly written/the character is a mary sue. This, however, is so far a well written story with an interesting character.
Side note: what also is kinda bad about many HiE (when they turn into ponies) is that the color scheme tends to be quite bad. Thanks for creating a pony with a color scheme that doesn't make me want to gouge my eyes out. (Blood red fur, black/yellow mane, black/red eyes, arggggggg, bad colors, especially they way they portray it)
Try this:
There on the cover was a picture of a bright fiery looking bird.
When will the next chap be out I want to read more of this
Personally, I tend to rather like scenes like this, partly because of character development like you said, and partly because it help showcase the fact that they are now operating with a child's brain, making them more prone to distractions and flights of fancy. Plus, I'm going to assume that Jerry was already a might shy before hand, and now that he's Phoenix it's only magnified.
I wonder if Luna will come into his dreams and help him with nightmares?
3045144
A good question.
I've seen a lot of HiE stories where the main character gets turned into a pony, but this is probrualy my favorite one. Good Job
3051972
Wow! Thank you!
well done chapter
I like it, though I have only seen one story where we had a childized OC that I didn't like, so that's not saying much. And feel free to make the chapter longer, just all the more for us readers to gobble up.
"Especially the whole 'waking up as a colt or a filly in equestria.'"
This is not my experience. Either I am a lot worse at searching google than I thought, or I have only found around 5 stories of that type actually worth anything.
Edit: And This is one, so far. Definitely following.
Wow! You guys are all awesome! Had no idea the story would be liked by so many! Thank you all!
Dude for the love of everything that is good please make him reavel why he was in the ever free please for the love of god do that
I wonder if he will ever let his human traits show..
Love this story!
3068109
Calm yourself.
It's coming.
3068432 ok ok I'm calm know ... God do it soon I need to know what happens
3068487
LOL!
3068514 lolz
That's so ADORABLE! Cant wait for the next Chapter^^
awesome chapter
So much feelings...HHHNNNGGGG!!! (But his Dad is an A...hole)
So, it appears that he was rather meek as a Human, & being in the body of a hurt young Colt is amplifying that, making his timidness worse? Seems like he'd get along just fine with Fluttershy then, & is unlikely to say or do anything to make the ponies think he isn't a timid little Colt.
But Luna saw his dream... what will she make of & do about it?
3073693
A good question my friend.