Awkward Conversations And Other Stories

by No one is home

Madame Alias' Fantastic Pandemonium of Wonders (Diane): The Circus Comes To Town

It was three AM when the train rolled into Canterlot. There was nearly nopony to see it’s brightly colored cars, each proudly announcing itself in bright friendly letters, “Madame Alias’ Fantastic Pandemonium of Wonders”. There were cars carrying the usual elephants and lions. There were brightly colored sleeper cars for the performers, some clearly marked as the residences of the show's star performers, such as Ba’al Zebul, who’s car proclaimed him to be the greatest fortune teller alive. A portrait, presumably of the vaunted seer portrayed a mysterious zebra leaning over a glowing crystal ball. Then there was Franklin Nathaniel Stein’s Odditorium, and the Flying Calypso Family, purported to be famous acrobats from exotic Saddle Arabia. There was Dead lift, supposedly the strongest pony in all of Equestria, and Tangled Knot, the amazing rubber pony. Other cars advertised a maze of mirrors, and a fun house.

The train veered onto a branch line pulling to a stop behind a vacant lot, destined to one day be a warehouse, but now only a convenient open space. Changeling workers boiled out of the train and began pitching tents. Silently throughout the night the circus grew seemingly out of the ground itself, and by dawns light, ponies looked in amazement at the spectacle that sat in what they knew had only a day before been empty space.

The place sat silent until mid-day, as pony’s flocked to restaurant row to eat their lunch and gossip. Before returning to their homes and businesses. All at once the Parade erupted. At the lead were a dozen changeling drones, their faces the brightly painted masks of clowns. As they marched they took turns taking on ridiculous shapes to the amusement of the gathering ponies. Behind them a shapely changeling queen, clad in the uniform of a ring master rode proud on her parade float, head held high as she began to narrate in a megaphone.

“Greetings ponies of Canterlot! Madame Alias’ Fantastic Pandemonium of Wonders is honored to perform in your grand city! Come and be amazed! Come and be astounded!” the changeling proclaimed as the parade rolled on.

The next float was host to a stern-faced zebra wearing an ornate turban and exotic robes, his piercing gaze swept across the crowd before he laughed and unleashed a flock of pigeons into the air with a flourish of his nimble hoof. The crowd erupted into applause and Madame Alias continued her narration, “Behold! Ba’al Zebul, Seer and Sage to mighty sultans and unchallenged master of the mystic arts! He shall astonish you with mystic feats beyond belief!”

The next float carried a thinly smiling, thin unicorn stallion, light blue in coat and mane. He rode beside a massive cage bearing a crafty beast with the heads of both a tiger and a goat, with a viper for its tale. The tiger’s gaze swept the crowd, and when any pony met her gaze, she licked her lips hungrily. Nervous gasps erupted as Madame Alias narrated, “Fear not, my little ponies, for the dreaded chimera is the least of what you’ll see in Professor Franklin Steins Odditorium! Wonders and horrors beyond belief! His collection will amaze you! It will astound you! We must insist that no foals be in attendance! What you will see inside his tent is not for the faint of heart I can assure you!”
The next to floats drew gasps of amazement as a family of brightly garbed Saddle Arabians swung and somersaulted through the air between the moving floats. “You’ll think they have wings ladies and gentlecolts!” Madame Alias announced cheerfully, “All the way from exotic Saddle Arabia, and always performing without a net! You will see acts of aerial acrobatics that would amaze the Wonderbolts themselves! They are the Flying Calypso Family!”

The parade wound its way through the streets of Canterlot with its promises of wonder and merriment. Princess Celestia watched with some interest and much unease. A circus run by changelings could be a front for any number of nefarious plots… or it could be a simple show to entertain ponies. Certainly with the news of late, her capitol could use a pleasant distraction. She decided to watch and wait.

Princess Fast Change watched the proceedings with no small amount of concern. These changelings, while not so holed as Chrysalis’ love-starved drones, still bore the pocked markings of involuntary feeding. In itself that didn’t necessarily mean that they were hurting anypony, but it would cause some stir with factions within the city who were already uneasy about the changeling presence as it was. She resolved to speak with this Madame Alias very soon and lay down her own guidelines, before the city nobles beat her to it.

Meanwhile at Decanter Elementary Miss Shade Fire had finally given up all hope of advancing her scheduled lesson for the day, and agreed to an impromptu class outing to see the parade, much to the delight of her students.

“Come on, Diane,” Indigo bolt smiled at the little changeling filly, “You gotta like the circus!”

“I’ve never been to the circus,” the changeling admitted shyly, drawing looks of disbelief from her two friends.

“Seriously,” Glenda cocked her head and clicked her tongue against her beak, “You’ve never been to the circus? Even I’ve been to the circus!”

“Hey, I got some money from my folks,” Zap said brightly, “You should ask Surprise if it’s okay if me and you can go see the show after school!”

“Just you and Diane, hmmm?” Glenda raised a feathered brow.

“I- it’s not like THAT feather brain!” Zap protested, “I just thought Diane needs to have some fun, you know?”

“Yeaaahhhh,” the griffon rolled her eyes, clearly not buying it, “Just good friendly fun. So you won’t mind if I tag along?”

“That sounds great!” Diane smiled, as Zap glared daggers at the grinning Glenda, unaware of side interaction between her friends, Diane continued, “My first circus with my two best friends!”

As the parade floats passed by, Diane could almost swear for a moment that the ring master looked straight at her and smiled wickedly, but the unnerving moment quickly passed. As the chimera’s float passed Zap shuffled uneasily, drawing a fit of giggles from Glenda.

“Oh we gotta see that!” Glenda grinned widely.

“No way,” Zap insisted, “You heard Madame Alias! That shows for adults only!”

“I’m part bird, but somehow you’re the giant chicken,” Glenda rolled her eyes, “How’d that become a thing?”

“I could get in tell you about!” Diane glanced around to make sure Miss Shade Fire was out of earshot.

“Oh really,” Glenda asked with interest, “How do you figure on pulling that off.”

“I’m not supposed to, but I can shift into adult ponies,” Diane bragged quietly, “I’m like the best shape-shifter, like...well...ever!”

“No way?!?!” the griffon beamed, “Alright Diane! See Zap, that’s how you earn your cool card! So it’s agreed, after school, we meet back at the Circus grounds at...7?”

The friends agreed and Miss Shade Fire led the students back to class, she wondered if perhaps she could fit in a short lesson about Zebra culture, or perhaps Saddle Arabia. Maybe the disruption wouldn’t be a total loss...

Author's Note:

A circus? I'm one hundred percent certain it's not an evil circus run by a murderous, criminally insane drug dealer. I predict nothing but laughter, fun, and rainbows!

Comments

[Not so New Brony]

Before returning to their

to their homes? business?

I'm guessing that this takes place quite some time since the funeral?
If it weren't for the fact that Madame Alias is a drug dealer, I'd have thought the whole point of setting fire to Just Desserts was to kidnap Train Wreck and make him into an attraction.

Silly and absurdly cliche, I know but it's not the most convoluted thing my mind has come up with before.

p.s: A changeling circus...I'd actually be interested in attending one...provided I don't get abducted and replaced...can changelings detect other changelings?

[Daremo]

By the pricking of my thumbs...

[No one is home]

7303421 Yes, yes it is...

[No one is home]

7303414 This takes place about a week or two after the funeral. Surprise and family have settled into their new home in Fast Change's hive, Diane has started school, tears were shed and life goes on for the unusual family. I glossed over the intervening time because it's safe to say there were no zany adventures or deep revelations. Just a family coming to grips with their loss. I skipped the trial of Stormy Night because Diane was right. He's really not worth the words.

[Daremo]

shows star performers - show's star performers
ware house - warehouse
mega-phone - megaphone
stern faced - stern-faced
viper for it’s tale - viper for its tail
saddle arabians - Saddle Arabians
love starved - love-starved
ring master look straight - ringmaster looked straight
earn you’re cool - earn your cool

*****

Eeeyup, evil circus in town. Keep a close watch on the foals everyone...

Changeling workers boiled out of the train and began pitching tents.

Whoa... suddenly this tale takes a turn for the M-rated.

[No one is home]

7308373 Typos banished to the freak-show!

[Boulder]

“Common, Diane,” Indigo bolt

'come on' & 'Bolt'

[No one is home]

7313465 Typo was taken out back... Youre almost completely caught up.