Diamond's denial

(Cover by Arcum42 )

A short experience on short chapters.

Diamond couldn't, and wouldn't fall in love with Apple Bloom, that was just, Out of the question.

She also wouldn't knock at her door and ask her out.

Or tell her her feelings.....

That was stupid

Then she did.

Chapters (7)

How she wished it would happen · 16th Oct 2014 · 340 words
340
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Surely it would go away! · 16th Oct 2014 · 171 words
171
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...it hadn't · 16th Oct 2014 · 143 words
143
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But surely she wouldn't knock! · 16th Oct 2014 · 187 words
187
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Just don't take a breath! · 16th Oct 2014 · 91 words
91
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Alright, you got her attention, don't stumble in your words! · 16th Oct 2014 · 71 words
71
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Hum...what? Success? · 16th Oct 2014 · 93 words
93
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Comments ( 7 )

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ShadowblazeCR

ShadowblazeCR #1 · Oct 16th, 2014 · 2 · · Hum...what? Success? ·

I cried a little when I saw the word count of the chapters.

Telaros

Telaros #2 · Oct 16th, 2014 · · · Hum...what? Success? ·

I love what you did with breaking down her anxiety with the chapter titles. Seriously, that was adorable. Could have been done in one chapter and just leave the title in giant bolds to break her mental states as her anxiety and excuses pile up. But it was done rather well and didn't grow old on me.

deadpansnarker

deadpansnarker #3 · Oct 16th, 2014 · · · Hum...what? Success? ·

Don't like it. Too soppy, pointlessly short chapters, minimum to no characterisation. Still, at least it gave you something to do on your lunch break.

Telaros

Telaros #4 · Oct 16th, 2014 · · · Hum...what? Success? ·

5148392 Well, it was done within 30 minutes. lol It basically plays off her being a tsundere type.

But yeah, it was a short little diddy. I had fun with it at least. Though I just read it on one page to save time. (chapter titles are actually a part of the story than just a throw away.)

Here's hoping there'll be supper served with this in the future ;3

Airwave Rider

Airwave Rider #5 · May 30th, 2015 · · · Hum...what? Success? ·

Short but sweet. It's obviously not trying to be ambitious, and it worked just fine as a fun little distraction. The whole thing could have fit in one chapter, but I think the breaks actually worked with conveying DT's hesitation. Overall, not bad.

Hoppa_21

Hoppa_21 #6 · Oct 1st, 2015 · · · Hum...what? Success? ·

I liked it. It was interesting. Especially the way you described the emotions. I found the end a little...short/not emotional enough?, but other than that I enjoyed it.

5148117

I enjoyed the short chapters, since I often get distracted and can't concentrate on reading till the end, when it comes to reading chapters that are over 4000 words long.