Anger Control
Anger Control
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Birds chirping, ponies smiling, and no sign of destruction was a good way to start a new day in Ponyville. This kind of serenity and peace doesn't come quite as often as it used to, with Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends defending all of Equestria on a daily basis and ensuring that nopony would be in danger, everypony can finally have peace, except Wildfire.
A cream-colored pegasus mare with a dark brown mane, light brown eyes, and a bad attitude. She dreads happy days like these because, everything does not go the way she wants them to. The last time she tried to have a ''good day,'' her sink fell apart and soaked the living daylights out of her, she didn't even leave her home for something bad to happen to her. Today was not the day to cross her path, or you would regret seeing her in the first place.
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She groaned as she walked out of her home, only to be greeted by a hose spraying her in the face. The force of the water caused Wildfire to lose her balance and slip on a puddle, where she struggled on her four hooves and wrestled the hose down to stop its constant annoyance. ''Why does it feel like I'm the only pony around here, who gets the wrong end of the stick?'' she inquired and let go of her grip on the hose.
Hoping that this couldn't possibly get any worse, a stallion rushed in front of her, careening into each other.
CRASH!
''I'm so sorry, miss.'' the dark grey stallion apologized, helping Wildfire get back on her hooves.
''You should watch where you're going!'' Wildfire shouted and pounced on the stallion, grabbing him by his neck in a fit of rage. Before she could do further damage, a light gold blur came up behind her in which she held her forelegs back, as the stallion ran away to make a quick escape.
Raindrops kept her grasp on Wildfire's forelegs to prevent the pegasus from squirming out, then she said, ''Wildfire, what's gotten into you lately? I know that you don't tolerate anything from ruining your day, but this is just ridiculous.''
Wildfire reeled her hind legs back and kicked Raindrops in the stomach, finally free of her grasp. ''What did you expect me to do, just take a pony rushing into me lying down? In the past, I would let this go but it's not like I'm going to be punished this time.''
Raindrops groaned and clenched her stomach, rising up on her hooves slowly. ''Maybe you're right, it's not like the mayor is going to find out about this and punish you if you blow a gasket.''
The two pegasi shared a laugh together. Ironically, Raindrops was wrong.
[/hr]
The next day, Wildfire walked out of her house to her mailbox where a letter was present. She opened the mailbox and scanned the contents of the letter.
Dear Wildfire,
After the attack that you gave a stallion the other day, the Board of Anger Management have decided that you must keep your anger under control without resorting to violence. You have twenty four hours to go without getting angry or attacking anypony else, or we will have to report you to the Royal Guard.
We wish you the best of luck and hope that you take this seriously.
Signed,
The Board of Anger Management
She rolled her eyes and crumpled the letter in her hooves, tossing the letter away. Out of all the times that her tantrum outbursts were seen by the public, the Board of Anger Management never found out about any of them, only this one attack. To her surprise, a punishment like this could not hold that much weight if she takes it seriously. All she has to do, is find a pony that can assist her with this.
Wildfire hovered above the ground, flapped her wings rapidly, and flew over to Raindrops' cloud house. Upon her arrival at the house, her hooves touched the soft, fluffy surface of the clouds.
She stepped over to the front door of the cloud house and banged on the door, a drowsy Raindrops approached the door with a cup of coffee in one hoof as she opened the door with her free hoof. ''Oh hey, Wildfire. What brings you here?''
Wildfire entered Raindrops' humble abode, sitting near the kitchen table. ''I need some help. The Board of Anger Management sent me a letter that said, I must keep my anger under control by not getting angry for twenty four hours or attack anypony. They will have no choice but to report me to the Royal Guard, I have a bad feeling that sending me to an underground dungeon would be their first order of business.'' she rolled on the table and kicked her hooves up in a panic, taking her exaggeration to a whole new level.
''I never knew that they even had an underground dungeon, but I'll help you. Even if you're acting like a drama queen, it's always good to help a friend out.'' Raindrops sipped her coffee and placed it on the kitchen counter.
Wildfire rolled off the table and landed on her hooves, she wrapped her forelegs around the back of Raindrops' neck. ''Thank you so much, you're the best friend a pony could ever ask for!''
''I know, so let's get started.''
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Raindrops puts on her glasses and brought out a chalkboard with white chalk along too, she quickly drew a diagram of how to control your anger. The diagram showed a crudely drawn picture of Wildfire kicking a pony in the stomach, a different Wildfire meditating, and tips on controlling her anger.
''As you can see from this diagram and drawings, the key to anger management is to clear your mind, meditate, and take breath in as a way to stay calm instead of getting angry.'' Raindrops explained, tapping her hoof on the diagram.
''Raindrops, I understand this and all but are there any tips?'' the curious pegasus asked, furrowing her brow at the chalkboard.
''I was getting to that part, Wildfire.'' Raindrops rolled her eyes, continuing to draw on the chalkboard, ''I'm going to write the anger management tips, if you do all of these tips in succession, you will be fine.''
''I hope so.''
Raindrops demonstrated the tips to Wildfire by acting them out: meditating, breathing in and out, doing yoga, ignoring anything that would cause her to blow, and listening to music.
Wildfire waved her wing to her friend, leaving the house and flying back to her's.
[/hr]
The sound of an alarm clock got her attention, as the sun painted the skies in its golden glow. Instead of smashing her alarm clock, she pressed her hoof down on the off button and made her way into her kitchen to make her breakfast.
''Looks like I survived the twenty four hours, thanks to Raindrops.'' she said confidently before taking out a box of Frosted Sugar cereal. The hothead pegasus poured the cereal into an empty bowl, she took out a carton of milk and watched the white liquid make its way into the bowl.
''Things are looking up for me from here on out.'' she scooped some cereal into her mouth, crunching the delicious morning delicacy.
Before she could even finish her breakfast, a small, red ball crashed through her kitchen window, hitting her in the back of the head with her face falling into the bowl of cereal and milk. The pegasus mare grabbed the bowl of cereal, throwing it out of the window without the concern of the bowl hitting an unsuspecting pony in the face. ''I've had enough!'' She shouted from the broken window, shattered glass laid across the floor of the kitchen.
Her face turning red with smoke coming out of her ears, the once cream-colored coat converted into a dark shade of red to visibly express her anger. ''I just can't catch a break.''
The End
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Good job! It was a great read
4677954 Thank you, glad that you enjoyed it!
Ah, poor Wildfire, I know the feeling.
Anyway, the story was a fun read for me. 
4678188 Glad you enjoyed.
I felt bad for Wildfire while I was writing this story, had to add some sympathy from Raindrops.
Short, but sweet. I liked it.
4678561 Glad you liked it, Manaphy.
Hello again.
In conclusion, it's not a good story, and I think it (and your writing) needs a lot of repairing. I'm sorry, but it's the truth.
Anyways, it's not bad... Actually, to be honest, it kind of is, and, it needs work.
Again, work on the pacing there. It would be nice if you at least described to us who Raindrops is. Whether she's a friend, a good Samaritan who happened to trot by, anything.
Also, why couldn't you show us how the 24 hours were like? Raindrops just gave Wildfire the diagram and was okay... Um, you do realize (especially with Wildfire's hot temper) that they're not going to follow it the first time around, right? I mean, if you at least showed us what those 24 hours of struggle were like, then that would've been a good story. Instead it was just setting plot -> Crap, I need your help! -> Here's some advice. -> I'm all better!
I'm not going to quote the Nostalgia critic again, but I'll say this: Take your time to establish what's going on, don't rush everything just to share it with everyone. Take as much time as you need to. Okay, not too much time, because that'll be a cause for concern; but, the time needed to create a well paced story.
The only kudos I'll give is the symbolism of both Raindrops and Wildfire. I get it, Rain putting out fire + "Pays to keep a cool head" = Anger management, that was pretty cool.
And, when you asked me if you should start slow or throw us into the action, let me be a little more specific on why I said, "Try both": Both should be used to establish what's going on. If you want to slow things down, use that time to establish characters and build up to a certain scene. Like when she realized that the letter was no joke, use the time to build up from when she laughed it off to when she realized that this was serious. Don't summarize it in one paragraph. In the beginning, you're throwing us into the action. So, try to establish what's going on. Why did Wildfire groan as she exited her home? Why was the hose on to begin with? How and why did the stallion crash into her? Who's Raindrops?
To quote Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw, "The cruelest thing you can do to an artist, is to tell them that their work is perfect when it isn't."
4697537 Hmm, I see. Well, thank you for being completely honest with your criticism. That's the only problem I see in my writing, the pacing.
4697548
You're welcome, my friend.
Hopefully, you can improve with time and effort.
4697556 I hope so too, so far things are not going my way with my writing.
4697558
It will someday. But so far, that writing Pizza really needs more word sprinkles and a little more time in the oven.
4697583 I see what you did there, but you're right.
4697602
Mmm Hmm.
Anyways, good luck to you.
4697612 Thanks again.
4697618
You're welcome, my friend.
Defcon (awesome name, that guy) practically nailed all the major issues with this piece. Seeing as this is an earlier piece, I assume you have already incorporated much of what he suggested in his comment.
For a short fiction piece, the characterization is rather strong. It is easy to see Raindrops and Wildfire as actual ponies with a relationship that has gone through numerous scenarios like this. There is a nice subtlety to the extent of their friendship that gives this comedic piece some depth.
However, the writing itself comes off as rather shallow. The characters are by no means flat, but if I were reading carelessly, I might assume they were. Language plays a large part in reader interpretations; just the mere act of how the piece is written will influence what impact is left by the end.
What do I mean by the writing is flat?
Take this passage for instance:
If it is meant to be comedy, have fun with it! Turn that plain prose into something wacky! I want to laugh at how exaggerated a reaction Wildfire has to a loose hose. I want to imagine the hose is as big an annoyance as Wildfire believes it is.
In short, experiment with language!
5430296 Thanks for elaborating more on what he said, my creative process at the time was completely out of whack.