The Traveler

by Teush

Ch4 "Meeting the gang"

Too much whiskey. Definitely too much whiskey. Was the only thing on his mind when the sunlight started to seep through the curtains straight into his face. This is why I always sleep with curtains closed shut. At least you can open your eyes without looking striaght into the sun.

Slowly, he reached for his sunglasses. With much more comfortable amount of light assaulting his eyes, he moved to the bathroom. After dealing with a problem of full bladder, he poured himself a small amount of whiskey. Well, as they say in Poland, "What you've used to poison yourself, you use to cure yourself".

Guess it's time to get something to eat. Fried eggs would be nice. With that, he dressed, leaving his duster on the hanger. The revolvers also stayed in the room, unneeded in the castle. Opening the door, he came face to face with a maid just about to knock. Instead, she patted him to the chest. Startled, she jumped back to a full bow. "I-I'm so sorry, sir! P-please forgive my rudeness!"

"Jeez lady, easy. I'm not some stuck-up noble, who would've beheaded you for something like this! Please, raise your head, it's getting somewhat awkward." Grabbing her by the shoulders, he straightened the maid's posture.

"Y-yes! Thank you, sir!"

"<sigh> I am also not an army's general. You don't have to sallute me, nor ending every sentence with 'sir', alright? Just say why you wanted to call me." The maid seemed to relax a bit.

"Ah, yes. The Princess invites you to have breakfast with her."

"Does she now? Well, can't say no to that. Lead the way."

The maid led him to the dining room. Upon entry, he's noticed the princess already waiting for him.

"Ah, sir Drexler, good morning. You look a bit pale, are the royal chambers not satisfactory to your sleeping habits?" Said Celestia with a permanent smile of a good matron.

Seems like the princess of the night has quite a long tongue. Not that I mind being called by name after all this time.

"Good morning to you too, princess. And no, the bed is extremely comfortable. Let's just say the royal liquor cabinet is too tasty to stop at one glass." Should've just said I'm hangovered.

"Oh my, should I call the chefs to get a medicine for you?" She looked truly concerned about his state.

"No, it's alright. Just a plate of fried eggs and a cup of coffe and I'll be good as new." He said with a hand wave.

...

After the meal, he leaned back on his chair with a mug of black drink in his hand.

"Now then, I guess it's time for some planning for my treasure hunting journey. As I know nothing about the land, I'll need a map and a debriefing about what I'm going to encounter on my way. And a hint about what said artifact looks like." Straight to the point, smooth as always. But seriously, if a war is about to break out, I need to act quickly.

"There will be no need for that, sir Drexler." Said Celestia, sipping from her cup of tea.

"Okay. One, just Roran is fine. Two, what do you mean by 'no need for that'? How am I supposed to find the bloody thing if I don't know where to look or even how it fucking looks like?! Oops, I'm truly sorry princess, I promised not to use such a language." Damn you filthy mouth of mine!

"That's quite alright, I understand your confusion. It's because you won't be travelling alone." Won't be travelling alone. I'm probably not gonna enjoy that.

"My former student, Twilight Sparkle, wanted to find this artifact on her own, but then her friends insisted to go with her. But when she heard I've summoned a human, she insisted to 'supervise the human so he wouldn't jeopardize the searching in order to change sides"

Oh god, I have to babysit a princess AND her friends? I'm sorry Celestia, but that's not gonna happen. "With all due respect princess, but I have to object. Don't say 'I work alone', too cliche. First, I don't think a sheltered princess would be able to withstand such a journey. Second, I'm not gentleman enough to listen to their complaining. Third, I work alone." Aaaand there we go. Cliche as fuck.

"My apologies sir Drexler, but they're already on their way to Canterlot to meet with you and get ready for the journey." Right after these words a pony in a butler tux came in. "Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship and the Elements of Harmony, have arrived." After that announcement, he opened the double doors and revealed a group of six ponies.