Ugh.
Alright, do you want some advice?
Don't go evil if you don't want to have heroes trying to kill you repeatedly. I know, sometimes you have to do things that are morally questionable, but at others, just be a good guy. Wait in line rather than summon a horde of undead to tear the throats out of everybody except the barista. Or just freeze everybody in place. That's at least funny in a conventional sense.
I'm (sort of) reformed now.
Unfortunately, there're these six mares and their ruler who are making this VERY DIFFICULT.

EDIT: After four days, the Featured streak has ended. It was a good run.
EDIT: Featured again on 10 May? Aw, stahp it guys. Stahp.

EDIT: New coverart courtesy of Leila Drake. Go to her and commission stuff.

Okay let's just go over everything that's happened so far. Dragged into a road trip, check. Dragged to a convention, check. Dragged through dimension. Wait what? Okay, universe. Stop! Seriously what did I do to deserve that last one! Stop throwing me into impossibly horrible situations! It was bad enough being world thrown, but public enemy number 1!? What did I ever do to you!?

Evidently, I must have done a lot. I have been trapped here with nothing but my wit and ingenuity, but I'm still alive and have at least one friend. I decided that it would be better make the most out of my new life, and see if I can live at all in this crazed world of Magic and Myths. Hopefully I won't screw up too badly. I fear what may come if I do. Though.... this is all starting to feel familiar. I'm having some difficulty remembering from where though.
Co-authored from chapter 22 and on with Shinigamisparda

Alt Cover Art
Story inspired by "F**k it, I'm having fun" by JimmytheGrape and everything else in the League of Humans acting Villainous.
Props to them! Cover art is not mine.
Edit*2/13/2014*FEATUREBOXYES!
Edit**4/28/14**Technopathic is amazing and you should thank her greatly for working on new cover art for me. It's not done, but as she does it, I will continue to update my cover.
Edit***5/23/14*** NEW cover art is COMPLETE!
Edit****6/28/14**** Old cover art is back by popular demand

So, I accepted an invitation from a first cousin, once removed. It seemed like a sweet deal at the time, I mean, there were these conventions I wanted to go and he so graciously offered me a place to stay! Alright, so I had to share a room with my brothers, but I had the first convention all for myself! Plenty of cash to spend, and my costume was really easy to make!

Naturally, I spent all of the money that didn't go into my costume on everything that caught my fancy.

I should have left that table alone.

Now? Now... I am not as mad at Celestia as I could have been, as I should have been, all things considered. I can't help but let it be smoke in the wind.

It's in my nature.

And she... she knew there was a chance it would happen.

I'm so sorry, Wind Whistler. It was my fault.

DJSkywalker has been contributing so much, I'm officially adding Dj as a co-author.

This story is a sequel to Golden Grace, Headless Headaches

Okay, SO, after stopping Omega and saving Equestria from whatever he had planned, along with Measured from certain death, I kinda, sorta, maybe used up a bit too much of my power.
There's no 'maybe' about it, you did.
And Measured, Twilight, and I are going to do some tests to see how bad it is.
Once you stop flinching at the very mention of Twilight's name.
First things first, though. Someone get me away from Cel, she's gone bananas!

This story is a sequel to Headless, not Heartless

Okay, taking it from the top.
Hi, I'm Auric Fulcrum, also known as Frank DeFontaine. For about 1,500 years, I wasn't alive. I instead inhabited my Dullahan costume as a spirit because of my sword, which also brought me to Equestria. Once I got here, after a few years of back and forth, Sunbutt imprisoned me because of a minor misunderstanding.
I heard that!
You were meant to!
Anyways, once I got out, I learned that the Wise One was coming to this reality, so I did what came natural to me.
I sought out the power of the Golden Sun and used it to defeat him so utterly I would never have to worry about him again.
Problem was, the energies that bound me together and the power of the Sun conflicted, so my armor fell apart. And without the armor, I was unbound, unfocused.
I came to a week later in the same basement I had been imprisoned, in my old body, but with a few...upgrades. Like Alchemy being a Thing I can Do.
Now that I'm alive again, my to-do list is radically different, but no less daunting.
For starters, how am I supposed to stop a mountain from sinking into the earth?!

I was known as Frank DeFontaine. I was going to a Halloween party. I was a pretty intelligent kid, starting my first college term, and decided a little dress-up couldn't hurt.
My buddy Richard got involved, though. And like everything, he took it a bit too far. This time, I didn't say no, though. I really should have.
Next thing I know, we're going all-out on making my Dullahan costume. Because he's my favorite optional boss, and all.
Really shoulda known something was up when that guy behind the counter just so happened to have a sword that fit our specifications perfectly.
Next thing I know, I'm in Equestria. And I'm missing a head.
Sakes, I could use a drink. And a neck.
-----
Featured on 2/19/2014.
I'd like to leave it at "Holy mother of-!" but that doesn't capture what I'm feeling!

"Knowing all you've seen through that man's eyes, all his powers all but forced him to do... would you still strive to all but become him?"

Knowing what I know now, and what creepy sense that strange peddler's words now make to me...

I'd still say hell yes, of course. Come on. Magic. That's like the best thing that ever happened to me.

Becoming enemy number one of a country with demi-gods at the top just because my snark has gone into overdrive? Not so much.

For the League of Humans Acting Villainous group. Edited by Ranakastrasz, newbiedoodle, and Xanathar.

Will contain spoilers for the whole of The Dresden Files up to Cold Days, but can be read without knowledge of the series.

Thanks to the Dresden files wiki for making this easier and everybody that's made this bandwagon worth jumping onto.