Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
"You have a bunch of trophies of your own, don't you?"
"Lancie..." Rainbow grumbled, strolling through the many-many shelves.
"What, is it illegal to have idle conversation?" The tiny statue shrugged. "Not like you're being quick about this, anyways."
"These griffons are friggin' hoarders, I swear," Rainbow muttered.
"Isn't a part of you at least remotely jealous?" he asked.
"Not... really..."
"Oh?"
Rainbow tongued the inside of her muzzle, glancing left and right at the many glittering objects. "Most of this stuff is... abandoned junk from Celestia knows how many years ago," she muttered. "Like... what's the friggin' point of having trophies if all of the accomplishments are forgotten?"
"You cant pawn accomplishments for bits, now can you?"
"Lancie..."
The statue shrugged again. "Well? One day, even you will go the way of all mortals, and what will become of your trophies?"
Rainbow exhaled with a shudder. "Must we?"
"We must!"
The mare frowned, shuffling ahead. "Apple Bloom is the one dying, not me."
"But—"
"She is the only concern right now, okay? Not me."
Lancie leaned back in the satchel pocket, smirking. "From the way your former gal pal, Gilda, puts it—seems you were a pony who used to live in the present."
"Mmmff..."
"Did that ever really change? I mean..." Lancie reclined against her. "All this doting on Princess Frecklestasia... seems like you still wish to keep the feelings of the present more alive than the reality of the future."
"I can't believe after all the crud we've been through together—all for AJ—that you could actually believe such a stupid thing."
He smirked. "So, then, what ever became of the extra-special letter you wrote to Her Majesty, Miss Apples?"
Rainbow Dash paused slightly, blinking into crystalline space.
"Surely her dog didn't eat it?"
"I..." Rainbow shuddered. "I didn't give it to her."
"If we had a paint bucket around here, I'd ask you to color me surprised. As it stands with you, however, I don't think I need either." Lancie shawned. "The paint bucket nor the surprise."
"Lancie, it... it just wasn't appropriate," Rainbow muttered. "Not with her sister being bitten and... and..." She gnashed her teeth, then shook her head. "I swear! This universe friggin' hates me."
"Does it, now?"
"It's always one step forward but three steps back. Honest to Goddess..."
"Ah, yes..." Lancie winked. "Because a universe that hates you would turn you into a hero, throw you into one exciting adventure after another, and give you plenty of reasons to feel warm and fuzzy over all of the nice things you've done for your best friend in secret."
Rainbow Dash was speechless.
"Well...?"
"None of that matters," Rainbow grumbled, shuffling forward. "At least... not until I've found a cure that'll fix Apple Bloom and make Applejack happy."
"Hmmm... so perhaps you indeed have changed."
"Huh?"
"A mare who lived in the moment just wouldn't give a damn." He pretended to examine his stone talons. "She'd be satisfied with the warm fuzzies, no matter how the universe hated her."
"Guh..." Rainbow rolled her eyes and growled, "Will you please stop rambling and just help me find the damn Chalice already?"
"What?" Lancie yawned and pointed aside. "You mean that one?"
"Huh?" Rainbow turned, and her jaw dropped.
Situated on the third shelf from the floor, behind three dusty trophies, was a short and stout golden goblet with four ruby studs. It glittered with remarkably brighter brilliance than the rest of the objects around it.
"No friggin' way..." Rainbow Dash reached in, brushed the other trinkets aside, and picked up the heavy object. "Why d-didn't you say something earlier?!"
"I dunno." Lancie waved a stone paw. "I guess I was too busy slice-of-lifing."
"Grrrrr..." Nevertheless, with a sigh, Rainbow polished the golden goblet's surface with her hoof. "The thing's a lot heavier than I imagined."
"I wonder if it's the real deal, though."
"Guess there's one way to find out," Rainbow said.
"Eh?"
Rainbow Dash looked behind her. She backtrotted until she stood squarely in between the shelves of trophies. Then, holding her breath, she stretched her wings out... and flapped them.
FWOOOOOOOSH! Her wingpower multiplied by a factor of ten, blowing every object off its shelf for dozens and dozens of feet. Cl-Cl-Clatttter!
Lancie whistled, impressed. He turned to smile up at Rainbow Dash. "Now let's go find a bunch of port-a-potties!"
"NO."
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Lancie, ya stoney insightful bastard. If I didn't know any better I'd say you really cared about our colourful hero.
For all that he acts aloof and indifferent to the whole situation, we're lucky to have ol' concrete-head around. He won't let Apple Bloom die.
I bet Fibb is only answering one of Gilda's questions.
At least he didn't call her Junior.
Wow Signal activate.
Oh no. It just hit me. The Revenge Squad is trailing Rainbow, right? So what if— *looks at Fibb* *looks at looming horizon* *looks back at Fibb* Oh, crap.
[Someone please smack me, I just realized Fibb is Biff spelt backwards]
The nagging fear that once Lancie is finally reformed (Huehue) he's going to be Discord again and destroy stuff is actually something I don't think matters. I remember, about... 200 or so chapters ago, Lancie actually curled up with Dash when she was asleep, so he obviously likes her. Probably still going to be a dick after he gets his full power back, but then will realize that he actually enjoys his friendship with RD like he did in the actual show with Flutters.
A reference to Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Inb4 sharpquill.
6231395 *Smack*
I didn't realize either. Guess I get one too *smacks own forehead*
Now to fight some more nazis.
Phew, with that last chapter I'm finally caught up! It's been a pretty wild ride and I can't wait to see what we have left ahead of us.
I also just wanted to give a quick thanks to Skirts/JE/IC/BH here. I've spent the last few months getting caught up on both series and it's been an awesome experience to read two stories that are both fun to read and pretty thoroughly explore best east horse's character. I think I've lost count by now how many long boring nights at work were made a little bit better when I see the notification pop up on my phone for a new chapter of Ynanhluutr, and now I have Appledashery updates to look forward to as well.
Now to just get the Chalice out without being caught.
Whelp, so much for that plan.
Slice-of-lifing Lancie is best Lancie.
6233484
Congratulations, and welcome to the... actually, we don't really have a name, do we? Let's see here... Spearhead Ply?
6233696 Thanks, glad to be here!
Hmm, let's see... I think I'm partial to the Phased Parley.
6234969
6233696
I propose the Grotesque Gallery.
Nah. Skirts is just a sadistic, malevolent sonuva whatchamacallit who takes sickening, meanie-britches pleasure out of torturing the hell out of you in every way imaginable.
6233696
Phased Replayers?
6888320 I liked "Played Seraph" Myself
Well, you are the main character of a Skirts story, so...
"two steps back to go four steps forward"
Back: the wind wall, 1st time at Fibb's, meat pounding with Gilda.
Forward: 2nd time Fibb's, uncovering Gilda and Rainbow's past