Commence Read

Well that was interesting.

I can pretty much favorite your stories before reading them at this point.

inb4 "inb4 feature box"

It was worth every fucking dollar. Seriously Darf, thank you so much.

Foalcon and no males as far as I can see from this? Consider me faved!

So many foulcons coming out as of late

Commence....Hey....2329399

Alright then...

2329401 Agreed.

2329518

2329532

A darf story, now i must read.
But the next chapter of PPP is almost done
FUCK
..... ;-;
+1 will read later when it gets featured.

How come you always release a new story within a day of me releasing a new one, Mr. Darf?

Not that I'm complaining, mind you.

Its at times like these that I wish foalcon wasn't one of my interests, I really do....

Anyway, for what it is it's very well done.

Excellent work, may this fic eventually claim its rightful place in hell over those who it helped drag there.

2329875

As of now, SmutAnon sent me the next chapter of Apples At Sunset to edit, DNSesmith sent me his next chapter of Love, Sugar, and Sails to edit, I still have to do a special one for darf, and I am currently climbing the Matterhorn that is finishing the latest chapter of my story.

I simply didn't have the time to edit a 30K fic at the moment. Don;t worry, I'm still here.

That was sick.

Not that I am going to downvote or anything, I knew what I was getting into when I came to see the story. Still, very well writen.

Wait...Before reading, is this a rape fic? A rape fic that predators on Sweetie Belle? In the featured box, no less?

If so, I have a message for the writer:

I can't like this story. I work with kids and when I see things like this .... Well lets just say I broke I guys arm once when he tried to kidnap a kid in a park.

That fucking ending, bro.

2332047
oops
thanks

Really good, although I feel somewhat terrible for liking this so much.

2331372
Thank you, I had a laugh after being shocked out by this story

*sighs, rubs face sullenly*

Again?

This is why haters hate us

2329431 Wait... We didnt pay anything to this,so youre saying this is worth nothing????
I liked it but is someone finally able to write a imprisoning rape fic where the protagonist doesnt want to stay?

2335874
Not totally sure how you got that idea. If you read the description for this story, you'd see this was a commission from me; I gave Darf the idea and paid him to write it for me.

And I totally love it.

I wish I could downvote and upvote simultaneously. As it stands, though... upvote for the beautifully crafted tale.

Hell's gonna have a lot of partners down anyway.

You know I guess it's my fault I read this, I usually tend to only read the title and the summery for every story i read, so when I began to read i fell in love with the idea, children are going missing and it's up to sweetie (my favorite crusader) to grow and be come a super hero to save them. I eagerly read each chapter as the mystery grew, and when sweetie was captured I thought "this is it! The lowwest point for a hero, so they can rise up and become stronger, but no this isn't that story, this is ton of excitement and anticipation down the drain, and for that I appologize, I'm sorry that I wasted you time you wrote what you felt you had to write and you didn't force me to read, and I'm sorry that I was foolish enough to glance over the details before reading, I and sorry.

I also hate trying to type on an ipad

merlininkazani.com/images/games/7430/galeri_5.jpg
You... got paid for this?

Damn.

loved it!!!!! please more like this!

........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... Ok.

Clop that slow plays the reader, a villain with a refreshingly weird set of urges (compared to a lot of rapefic, anyway), and a perfectly used POV.

There are so many good things about this story that if there are flaws, they're hard to see. And that, I must say, is very difficult to achieve.

Very nicely done. :)

>consensual rape

1000 viewer! Yay!

Great story.

2377034
The hand that she says

2337706
man
just reading back over this
i feel kind of bad
sorry if you felt duped at all, man
i can see how that twist would come out of nowhere
i hope it didn't upset you too much
imagine i'm giving you a hug over the internet

I felt an absolutely indescribable amount of guilt for loving this story so much but i kept wanting to continue hoping there'd be a good ending and sweetie would make it out and all that. I was a bit saddened but certainly not disappointed but still talk about a guilty pleasure i felt completely wrong but this story was too good to put down keep up the great work

i don wanna :C
if i read this it means i'm done :C
it's like pulling teeth, or finally accepting you're an adult (still on hold that one, it amazes me that people pay me money and expect me to buy sensible food when I go shopping, not just 19p pasta in a can and polish wafer crisp things called familjine )

whelp, soon, not now tho, teaching a dude to sail tomoz, gotta blitz level one in a day :D
woop woop living the dreeeeeam

2337706
Eheheh, I know, right? It's seldom you get a gripping super-hero... ANYTHING. Just sittin' here, enjoying the escapades of Midnight Belle!
Hoo-boy, how's she going to get out of this one!?

Oh. Oh--

"...darn, that's the end."

darf,, will you write us more Midnight Belle? Maybe AU or non-canon? (Or maybe this is not canon, in the world of Midnight Belle?)
'Cause I was loving that story, more than I liked the story it turned into.

hey uh
correcting typos doesn't make you a grammar nazi

also, there's nothing i love better than waking up to five comments of minimal copy-editing on a months old story
with no feedback on the story itself
that sure is
valuable

2484845
I was merely glancing over the story. Kind of reading a couple others at the moment and thought I'd throw you a couple quick fixers. You don't need to be so defensive about it. It's silly to think you'll never make a mistake but even sillier to lash out to those willing to help you.
As for the story, it was meh. The build up was pretty nice, but instead of heroic Sweetie breaking her chains and saving her friends, she just gets fucked into oblivion. While that was hot, it was pretty poor for the story.
Great story? No.
Great clop? Yes. (once you get to it anyway)

2484866
i'm not being defensive
i'm just saying that copy-editing is kind of pointless on an endeavour that's already seen the peak of its attention
and is also completely separate from any narrative merit a story might have
like, it doesn't mean a lot to an author to hear that they missed an apostrophe
so by posting comment after comment of that stuff, you're saying you don't really care about what they wrote, you just want to nitpick it for things they missed in editing
even in a larger scale, errors like that have little to no bearing on the writing itself, unless they're persistent

not that i don't appreciate free copy-edit
but
it's just so long after the story was originally published, it doesn't really serve any purpose

maybe that's being defensive?
i dunno
thanks anyway, i guess

2484884
"so by posting comment after comment of that stuff, you're saying you don't really care about what they wrote, you just want to nitpick it for things they missed in editing"
....that's the definition of a grammar nazi by the way. It's not the volume of mistakes I point out, it's just me nitpicking. I don't really see how me pointing that out makes me not care about the story though. I just see little errors and point them out to people while I'm reading. I pre-read for a few people so it's drilled into my head to make sure everything turns out perfect.
And of course it serves purpose, hopefully now you'll use the correct mythological spelling for gryphon.
(A simple "Thanks mate, what did you think of the story?" would have sufficed)

I knew it, I knew Bon Bon and Lyra was the culprit. I had a suspicion way back when they were giving candy out in chapter 1! It was confirmed after Applebloom and Scootaloo went missing! This had Hansel and Gretel written in big red font, except instead of cannibalism it had sexual predators (filly traffickers)!
*Spider sense tingling engage!*
Props to you for not writing it so as to blatantly give it away though.

2475803

Yeah, but in a way, that's the beauty of the story. It lets the reader play along with Sweetie, and then tears the illusion apart for the reader and the character at the same time. Sweetie was in over her head from word one, she just didn't know it. The story didn't let us know it either.

I should probably shut up with the fangirling for now. I simply felt I should respond to this point; there is so much to love about this story!

That's the only reason I ever come back to read it again. Ahem.

2485858

Nopony uses the correct mythological spelling for griffon. ALL HAIL FAUST. ALL HAIL FAUST.

Damnit... wish she had escaped with her friends after that. Off to watch a CMC episode to get my mind off of the dissapointment. It was a very good story and got me wanting more. A small one or two chapter sequel where they escape and they live happily ever after? I'm grabbing at smoke I know...

2674518
actually everyone does use the correct form griffon/which is actually spelled griffin with an I not an o because this isn't referring to the mythical beast the gryphon, but another creature which is able to talk, in real lore the gryphon are king of the birds, while it takes the same form it is not the mythical creature so the spelling is correct
also a griffon is a dog breed, not a mythological creature, i've bread them before very nice dogs
and yes the only reason i wrote this was because i've seen several comments about this and it annoyed me

2722359

I was saying that nobody spells it 'griffin' anyway, so it's not like the spelling is exactly an issue.

I use Faust's spelling too. It was a nit, I picked it for a while, and I got over it. It's just a convention of the fandom.

2722371
i know it was a nit, that's why i wrote it