• Member Since 1st Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

darf


pony-writer/pornographer looking for work. old stories undeleted. i'm sorry. Patreon here

T

Poems are a window to the soul—a lens of wonder that reveals the beauty of the world around us. In this collection, nine of the fandom's most talented poets hold that prism up to the ponies we all cherish.

The poems in this anthology cover all main characters and a wide spectrum of Equestrian life, and range in style from strict form to free verse. We've presented them in an order that showcases the collection's wide variety of styles and themes. There's also an index if you're looking for a favorite subject, author, or poetic form.

It is our hope that this effort can make readers unfamiliar with poetry consider ponies in a new way—and in doing so, also show that poetry can be approachable, honest, and amazing.

A list of contributors follows below. Endless thanks—this project would not have been possible without you.

Poets:
darf
Aquillo
Horizon
The Illusive Badgerpony
PersianJuliet
Cynewulf
ambion
ForeverFreest
Defoloce

Fimfic Editing and Arrangement: darf
Organization and Creative Oversight: darf, Horizon
Cover Art: Pony Horse Nice-guy
ToC Lettering: Spaerk

Chapters (39)
Comments ( 173 )

A 39 chapter fic totaling 8.5k in one go?

Well, if it works.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Well, this certainly is an interesting little collection you've got here. I'll be looking forward to reading it.

I had to read this one out loud, it was so catchy. Though I could almost hear someone else speaking it also.

I... what?

I could totally see a battalion singing this.

That awkward moment when the table of contents, and the summary in some cases, is longer than most chapters. Methinks James Patterson has been meddling in other's affairs.

i held the list of things
to bring home tightly
in my claw and asked
him if he needed
help with something

don’t we all
he said

Wow. I don't have much more to say than that.

This might just be my favorite out of them all.

(Untitled graffiti found on the walls of Canterlot, after the Changeling invasion)

My love, what have you
become? What dread change, what lie,
what eyes gaze at me?

What green fire, your pyre
alights? What dark jewel, thy skin,
shining, imitates?

My love, where have you
gone? For I am lost, and I
cannot see the sun.

Comment posted by Cerulean Starlight deleted Jun 15th, 2013

2726844

(Scrawled beside it.)

Should I reply, oh
Love? Should I lie and whisper
Comforting untruths?

Should I say you meant
More? Prop up your shattered soul
And say I love you?

You were food and prey,
Love, and that will not change, no
Matter what I say.

I hate Haikus. Using a form from a mora timed language in a stress timed language by counting the number of syllables is a special type of madness.

:') Gotta love how it paints a world and story all on its own.
Thanks for writing this, ambion, and you too, Darf, for putting it up.

I like this. This is a neat idea. This site needs more sights such as this.

What is the pattern of paternal Time?
What is his quarrel and fight?

Wow, I really like that one! But I don't get the "quarrel and fight" question, nor do I get the "last of the last" question, nor do I get the "Oblivion" couplet. I don't get how they relate to how times have changed with Luna's crime and banishment and time on the Moon and return. I don't get why the questions about those things are being asked and what they mean.

"How serves amending to mend?

Hm. Someone's asking this question because they're unsure of whether the damage (emotional damage to Luna, possibly?) of Luna's crime and banishment have been mended?
I walk away from this poem with the idea that Luna's return was the beginning of a new epoch defined by the restoration of the diarchy and by Twilight and her friends taking upon themselves the Elements of Harmony and by the six Bearers' encounters with other resurfacing figures from Equestria's past—Discord, Chrysalis, Sombra, and the likes.
Good opener. "These are the days of FiM; this is the setting of the following poems," sort of thing.

Poet: Defoloce

"Beneath the Sun"

I quickly familiarized myself with the "English ghazal" form—I'm not familiar with the form of the Arabic ghazal, so I can only look at this from an English-ghazal perspective.

Please keep in mind that this is only my opinion, and nothing more.

There were two parts that seemed to be put in an improper place, making their inclusion seem unnecessary even though it fit into the poem:

A desert, do they cry, where nothing’s said to grow,
and yet our gardens blossom forth, gift from the Sun.

No fear can freeze me, nor can jealousy take hold
so long as I am fit to rear up by the Sun. (I'll admit that this may not really be an issue, just the poet offering praise to the sun in the form of a mighty self-declaration)

From long since past, the days on storytellers’ tongues,
are come the tales of the coming of the Sun.

All ponies lived in mistrust of their own alike
for all was scarce and needful ere there came the Sun.

A loom does not hold in it a capacity
to weave a visage that proper tributes the Sun. (This just seems to come out of nowhere. The narrator is talking about the time before the sun came, but then he comes into how no tapestry or other sewing-art can encapsulate the Sun's beauty; as it comes right after the bard talks about how everything Saddle Arabian residents needed was scarce before the sun, it leaves me wondering if the Sun did anything to being the needed things into bounty. I know it can be assumed that it is, but as this is the bard's praise of the Sun, I don't see why that was left out.)

The poem as a whole, though, I feel shows the bard's appreciation for the sun, and even though the poem doesn't rigidly adhere to the English ghazal form (as far as I can tell), the modified form does keep the praise consistent. The transition from talking about the sun in their area to the sun's origin in their land to the sun's beauty is something I can follow, and even though the transitions between them are not smooth, the bard's talk in each subject is pleasant to hear.

The first section is about the majesty of the sun in the bard's area, and for three couplets, it embeds a great mystery in what lies beyond the horizon. Saddle Arabia is a place we don't know about, and thinking about there being a place beyond the place shows a great consideration for the bard on your part. Well done!

The middle part, where the bard talks about the origin of the sun in their land, lacks a lot. The bard says that the storytellers told the story of the coming of the sun, but there's no tale about Celestia bringing it. It's just that darkness ruled, and then it moves to the last point. I'll just say that I didn't like it.

The third part of the bard's poem talks about the beauty of the Sun, and of Celestia, and you present some very lovely imagery here. The part about the laughter dulling the swords stood out to me, and the rest of it was great. That part about being a servant to the Sun was believable because I felt that his acknowledgement of the Sun's kindness and beauty was something that resonated within him—I think that's why I don't like that second part, because it doesn't relate to him in any way.

To close this, the mentioning of the sun at the end of each line kept with the form, and it did so in a good significant manner each time. The rhyme scheme was not adhered to, but that's my taking this as an English ghazal; I don't know if you attempted to write it any other way, and if you did, you can ignore this/clarify what you did for me. The couplets, too, were significant in their own manner, and that's good.

Overall, I think this poem's okay. Eve though the rhyme scheme is absent, the other adherences to the poem form are used in a significant manner. The first part and the third part are good, but the second part lacks a lot. As an overall poem, you express pride, humility and wonder alright, although the weak middle does make the poem seem like the bard doesn't care about the Sun's origin.

That's just my opinion, though. Take it how you will.

This was confusingly profound.

For real.

there are
no paths in the
sky, except perhaps
when looking upwards
from the ground

Without thinking about it too much that bit struck a chord in my chest.

Even when they carry cider? :facehoof:

I can hear Sweetie Belle's voice cracking on half of those lines.

I like this one. Fulfilling.

2727501
If you're unaware of the nature of darf's other popular works … let's just leave it at "at least we kept our PG-13 rating". :twilightblush:

Author's note:
If you read this poem as a criticism of the limitations of artificial intelligence, you're not wrong. However, google "Joshu's dog" to cast some light on it from a different direction.

The poem is set in the Optimalverse, though I made a strong effort to ensure it stood alone without knowledge of the setting.

I love this in some sense, as humanity has this constant thirty for the intangible...
but here's my question. Is there a limit to what each of us might define 'intangible'? If so, can we transcend those limits?

Interesting. Are you still accepting chapter/poems for inclusion?

2727787

darf is awesome, but I'm definitely more of a fan of Pieces of a Grey Cloud than Pinkie Pie Sucks A Hundred Dicks. (That title makes me want to quote Clerks in the worst way...)

And I did :rainbowlaugh: at the cider line, though... or what the censors banned from being the cider line, so to speak.

2727920
this compilation was an assortment of hand-picked individuals based on their examples and some bias on my part. as such, it's a complete entity.

we have discussed the idea of doing open call compilations in the future, but based on the performance of this set, even with our signal boosting, i'm not sure there's an interest in it. will be sure to send out a call if anything further occurs, however.

So darf wrote it...
and it's not rated mature.
Hmmmmmmm...
:duck:

i.imgur.com/ocGSs.png
Welcome, pony poetry, you've made it.

2727927
Ah... very well, then. Thanks for taking the time to reply.

2728238
yeah, those 200 views really did it :rainbowwild:

it's the votes based on age - it got a lot when it went up

That last verse was the best. The old 'following rules not quite correctly' is a classic for a reason.:pinkiehappy:

This one is my favorite so far, especially this part:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Unrequited love
Sucks,

That is just perfect. Can't stop grinning.:pinkiehappy:

2728028
If there is going to be an open-call compilation in the future, it will almost certainly start (or at least be heavily advertised) over at the Poetry group. Personally, I'd love to do another anthology, but what 2727927 says is very true. With several big names and a month's hard work, we barely edged this one onto the featurebox, and it's gotten a mere 200 views. Future collaborations will definitely have to take into account the amount of work involved vs. the expected reward.

If someone (including you!) is willing to take charge and press forward regardless, maybe we can make an ongoing thing out of it, but it's a lot more work than it looks (as darf can attest).

EDITED TO ADD: With EqD's feature and a big spike in views, the whole endeavour feels a whole lot more justified, but as darf says below: aigh the formatting

2728370
the formatting
THE FORMATTING ALONE

ASDFASDG

sorry
i'm not mad
just

bleh

Comment posted by kingtwelvesixteen deleted Jun 16th, 2013

Wait, where did my comment go? I made a comment here earlier.:rainbowhuh:

Oh well, here it is again with the edit I wanted to make already placed inside:

Pfft, absolutely muffin. Puns are an underrated art.:derpytongue2:

Love how you set it up earlier in the poem with the misspellings and slightly off stuff too.

I can't help but notice that at the end of it CelestAI had managed to get Open Eye to be the one teaching koans to others instead of being the student hearing them.:trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:
Tricky tricky AI.

2727248

Wow, thanks for taking the time to write such an in-depth review of "Beneath the Sun!" Please know that I take all criticism to heart and try to improve myself based on it.

I admit my study of ghazals as they should work in English is pretty fragmented and incomplete. As you pointed out, the poem suffered from disjointedness, and I chalk this up to having too many images I wanted to cram into one poem whose format I'd already taken to its maximum length. I needed to keep the focus on praise, and my insistence on inserting snatches of mythology into it got in the way of that. Also, ideally, the last three syllables should repeat between couplets, but it was flat out beyond my skill to make that happen.

Originally I tried writing a qasida, which is more Arabic in origin to fit in with Saddle Arabia, but the format does not play well with English at all and I couldn't get anything to sound good. English qasidas mostly sound like someone talking to themselves, and they lack any of the lyricism present in their Arabic counterparts. Since ghazals are more Persian than Arabic, I moved the setting from which the poet was composing to a little-known land east of Saddle Arabia, where the ponies there seem to be aware of their own obscurity, and they happily think of themselves as the first to see each sunrise.

2728528
hey
just wanted to say i appreciate all your comments
as long as some people got something out of all our hard work, it makes any reception a lot sweeter

thanks again :heart:

In my mind I imagined this as a Disney-esque musical number. Neat.

Login or register to comment