Wow. Again, I see the sheeping coming full-force.

Okay guys, I can understand (no, I can't) your love of HiEs, but the complete disregard for grammar and punctuation in the description, chapter titles, and story title just baffles me.

Anyway, I will give you a PARTIAL read-through of the first chapter and post a list of everything I find that's wrong with the writing until I either: A. Kill myself, or B. Quit.

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As usual, Peppy is right.

U are going to hav a sequel right?

But little did he know that from the darkness and shadows, cold, hungry eyes, looked him over with sinister plans.
And a dark agenda, that would lead to the fall of all Equestria.

No no no no no why would you do this? this fic had so much promise and then you go and do the single most over-used and lame plot point.

This fic had promise, and now its falling.

I am dissapoint

3048830 I told you I'm not saying much. ;)

i really hope there will be a sequel because the story feels like it hasn't even broken out of the introduction phase of the story where you get the readers attention but i like it keep it up man

so far it is good very good actually you should make a sequel or add to it or something

Hay all, the new sequel to Dashing Hearts is out. its called "the tainted crown" give it a look.
Would you kindly.

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3237931oh god I MEAN UHH..,,..,.UUHH

3243013 well hello there! fancy meeting you here

The gammatical and spelling errors really killed it for me. I wanted to keep reading it but.... yea. Just i couldn't pay attention to the story when the mistakes kept smacking against the wall i build in my mind for each universe/movie in my head. If you can find a proof reader to clean this up or rewrite it, i may give it another chance.

i liked this fic alot. very lovely ;_;

3664240 I always like reading my readers analyst of my stories, it says that you actually absorbed the emotion that I was trying to convey

What is it with you and romance... Don't get me wrong, I may be one of the most violent & vulgar friends of my group but I'm a sucker for good romance. But with you and Zim it's gotten to the point where I deleted all the individual stories & just bookmarked your respective profiles. That being said, aside from the occasional grammar mistake (I'm in college & can't do algebra to save my life, don't feel bad) you're an excellent writer. You have excellent characterization & good pace timing. Keep up the good work.

Although..if you wouldn't mind I would question the sequel to this...if that's ok with you..

it was a good story, but somehow it feels like something is missing.

6052757 one of my first stories. I've been meaning to correct a lot of things.

That ending! Overall it was pretty good with a cute light hearted atmosphere, but that ending!

This was a decent first story. I wonder about Rainbow’s motivations as she escalated this relationship quite quickly -fast for a fast pegasus but too fast for an inexperienced pony and element of loyalty, I think. I liked the world building employed but would not have said, “No,” to more. The spelling and grammar was difficult, but I was able to understand the intentions.

Loved the fanfic and keep it up