ON HOLD- Sorry folks, next chapter won't be a while.
Sweetie Belle tries to use her magic, for 1 hour hanging from a tree, she tries to use her magic for once, Scootaloo questions Sweetie Belle before she disappears, while Applebloom nearly says nothing, after a while of talking, Sweetie Belle finally goes for her magic, but what happens, happens, now Sweetie Belle is far into the future, and she may never make it back home.
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2079882 Well the more I type, the more you're going to find out.
Well, this is going to be interesting. Too bad it has to start on such a sad note.
Interesting... concept. Grammer definately needs some work though... same with story development. I will be happy to help you with these things. If you want, just shoot me a PM, and I'll see what I can do...
Otherwise, great story.
Alright, since this story will have the past and the future at the same time, I'm settings 2 chapters every chapter.
E.g
Chapter ? Future: <Chapter>
Chapter ? Past: <Chapter>
Just to make the story last longer.
2080077 I'm not really good with my English, but I'm trying as hard as I can to make sure it makes sense.
2080084
I am aware of that, and it makes perfect sense, but it needs a few touch-ups, especially concerning where talking is concerned. That's all.
Sorry if I offended you... this is a great story.
2079882
Quoted directly form the FAQ:
So unless the author made a mistake with the categories (possible, there's some confusion between sad and tragedy) there has to be a sad ending.
2080106 None taken, but chapter 1 is only 3% of the story.
2080132
3%... you are planning on having 33 Chapters? Amazing. Cool. Wow. I know there are longer, but that's pretty long for a fan fiction.
2080137 If I keep my head up, I will.
I can think of three hundred and fifty stories just like this.
2080367 Name one.
2080389 the story three hundred and fifty for a start, Bok was making a joke about how there is a story that has almost the exact same plot except a few minor/major differences I.e. sweetie belle needs to go 350 years in the future after getting an uncureable heart disease only to learn she can't go back, Major difference being the amount of years and reason of time travel
Candy ID tags, time lost sisters, and strange hospital visits? Why can I never find a fic that's awesome, but also makes sense? Seriously though, you're doing a very good job.
Here is the past chapter,
Strange... I never published it... almost like my future self did it for me.
This is getting more and more interesting. I do have one suggestion though.
When you make a reference to the episodes like this, it is better to say "like she does sometimes" or "as is usual for her" instead of saying that it is like the episode. Otherwise, you're doing fantastic as usual.
2088790 Thanks for the advice, how could my future self be so foolish? ;-; Shall do a fix in a few minutes.
I just finished collage, hopefully I can do much more then I used to.
Ah, so this is how Rarity ended up in the future... probably. What cause leads to what event is hard to understand when time travel is involved. Still, excellent job.
Sorry for not being on typing up that chapter, been partying!
You should get the dialogue fixed.
Everytime someone else speaks you should make a new line
Like you did here.
2117518 4.bp.blogspot.com/-WQ3uAvGdPS0/UOB_OPS6rcI/AAAAAAAAKkU/HYaXXHVHTqc/s1600/whatever-dude-whatever.jpg
FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2123536 TOOOO THE MOOOOOOOOON!
Hi Skippy!!
please go to the mass hole. kind of a goof there.
its mess hall by the way.
2123831 Damn google translate, sorry, I really need to double check things before I publish stuff.
Nicely done as usual. I wonder if Luna is actually going crazy, of if Celestia can just communicate posthumously. Either way, this is just getting better and better.
This is great! I wonder what Lime Jelly's part in all this is. The suspense might just kill me.
The future is voice activated? Alicorn Twi is around? Rarity and Sweetie Belle found each other? Aged thirteen years? Awesome! I can't wait for the rest.
Cool
I like how this is heading it looks like the two timelines are going to intercept soon.
Would anyone like to volunteer?
I'm not really great at pony art, so would anyone like to make a like for this story?
DETAILS.
A huge glossy bold text at the time in Sweetie Belle's mane colour, with Sweetie Belle sad under the text, Little wringly Rarity at left side, and Twilight Alicorn on the right, but Twilight isn't really happy, for the background, again just glossy light grayish pink fade.
Well, this was a dark chapter. Don't get me wrong, it was still really good and it's nice to get some backstory, but I just didn't expect that. It's unusual to see the alicorns so... broken. I kind of like it actually, it gives them more depth.
More details = Better story. ^^
Well, that's different. Only 8% done? Good to know there's a lot more coming.
Don't worry, I'm planning something big!
2 chapters on it's way on the same day.
Hopefully I'll have it done soon.
Sorry guys, been real busy, although I stopped being a brony, I'm not going to end it here, I will update it so don't worry.
Please update