Nero Darkard
Joined 10th Oct, 2011 ·
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Nero Darkard · 216k words · 52 8 · 1.1k views
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Finally! The return of the most insane writer with even a much more insane story in his bag! I crackled an evil laugh when I saw this coming up! Continue good sir!
I see you're working your magic again.
It's powerful and vibrant to those knowing the story's first part. And very depressing; especially to me, who let Twilight send the letter and never dared to even look at the alternatives for fear of losing everything gained at such cost.
Happy ending? Alas, it was not to be, and I salute you for that. Right choice.
One thing irritates me; the would-be-assassin.
The descent from deceptively normal to raving lunatic is too fast and invisible to go over smoothly in my mind.
Also, you slipped into present tense with the very last sentence of the chapter. Looks quite odd.
Other than that, damn good work. I like the pace, the detailwork is just right, it gives the overall picture and is still intriguing.
If there's anything you need, proofreading, reviewing or exchanging ideas, spreading the word, anything at all, don't hesitate to shoot me a message.
- your fan, Arkhangelsk
2378036
Excellent! I was looking for pre-readers for this story!
I will keep you in mind. And also, thank you for pointing out the flaws.
I'll get fixing now.
One thing, thought: It is on purpose that the transition between normal and completely insane is very sudden. It will be explained later.
2378136
Then it would be a good move to mention or lampshade it in a way to make it a weird reality inside the story rather than something one could mistake for a careless hole in narration.
Just a short line of Twilight being surprised would do the trick.
As for pre-reader, I'm certainly willing to do my best if you decide to trust me with that job.
Not sure how much good I'd actually do, seeing as I'm not native in English and quite new to storytelling, though.
Either way, I look forward to the next chapter. :)
2378180
You do realize that im not native english myself... or not?
Im from germany and didnt speak a word english until i was taught it at school.
Ill add that line. Thanks for the idea.
See? You are already helping me out!
Well, lookie here.
I will write something greater about this, but currently I am on an iPhone.
I shall wait until I have access to a PC. In th time space between now and then I must say that this sequel is very highly anticipated, I am in suspense until the next chapter.
But for now... Goodnight you insane bastard.
To be honest I can't decide if I want to keep reading this story, it seems almost too dark and sad for me, plus I can't remember anything that happened so that sucks.
But, I shall read on.
2378768
Perhaps you should re-read the conclusion Ringing Bells to remember where we left of.
Thats the ending the sequel is based on.
And, yes guys, I know the story is only based on one ending and you would refer to this as canonizing it. But honestly, I would much rather prefer if you see all the endings as true and canon. After all, it was YOUR choice which decided how the story ended! Its just that with Ringing Bells, the story continues.
Just think though of how awesome it would be if you had another MI2 for EACH of the endings (would LOVE to see Twilight trying to protect the remains of Equestria until it falls)
2378136
Let me guess.
Dark exposure or extreme emotional torment drove whoever we are talking about insane. If that's the case, then to date I would have officially predicted two plot points (I remember commenting what I thought would happen, leading to you sending me a PM that was all like Holla Dolla Bill Yall, den it showed up in a later chapter) therefore ur gettin kinda predictable brah.
If not then slap my hands and spit in my face.
Note: I have no idea who we are talking about... I still haven't read the first chapter.
2383789
Hang on... hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on...
You were the first one to comment on this story,
You insulted it and praised it in the same freaking line,
You even offered me a... ow geeze
And you havent even read it?!
2383807
) So I think I'm gonna enjoy this ride too 
Well I read the original and thought it was pretty good (I started when ur were at about the CH14 mark... I think
Also what the fuck do you expect? Its me. MindFcuk in Aisles. The epitome of controlled insanity.
Well mostly controlled.
PS Was I right with my assumption?
2378768
)
This story isn't very dark... neither sad (Sad is debatable because SPIKE IS DEAD!
2383819
Let me guess.
Your father is called Discord.
2383831
Why would you even think that?
Do I look like some kind of OC queer to you?
Edit: Just so you should know. My fathers name is Richard.
Double edit: If you haven't already simulated an 'oh snap' then let me get that for you... "Oh snap!"
2383846
Got a problem with OCs?
Got a problem with Obsidian Shards?
2383863
Just... click this.
2383879
No problem, I was not serious anyway.
You forget that I'm the sick mind who came up with these stories
If there is one thing i truly enjoy, its disturbing things.
And weirdos are generally my favorite people, since im a freak myself.
2383984
You? a sick mind? don't make me Rofl.
2384012
2384117
Once more into the breech! This is guna be good. Poor applejack so worthless now
It's here! It is freakin here! I'm just gonna die of happiness now...
2390750
Wow was this really looked for so much?
Then I read the first chapter, remembered that alot of ponies died in the first story and all I could think was... "Bummer"
2391149 Yes! I don't know about everyone else, but I love a great story more than sweets, and that says something. I love your stories, so naturaly, happy!
It has arrived!!
imglols.com/wp-content/uploads/jenga-just-got-real.jpg
This is going to be AWESOME!!
2415171
Its about time you show up here!
I was getting worried
Yay! New chapter!
Also:
Always?
2450112
I cant believe none of my pre-readers saw that.
Thanks for pointing it out.
community.us.playstation.com/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/94311iE8F678AAC40AF610/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&px=-1
If the Bloodclaw Cult is run by a blood-relative of the Pies/Cakes, we're in trouble.
I hope you're not planning on doing something TOO dangerous Twilight. *skeptical face*
I think that should be: "Woah, it's alright. We aren't even keeping the Elements of Harmony anymore."
Hope that helps a bit.
2451069
Well a bit. Its not really changing the message or fixing any gramatic issues.
Its just artsifying it. Don't think thats necessary here.
2450145
Sorry :(
2461209
Hey you might be my best pre-reader, but you are not the only one.
Undead ponies? I think I have a vibe (just a little hunch that might be wrong) of where this is going:
I'm betting that their dead friends will be turned zombies and will be forced to fight them in one chapter or another! That would be terrific!
2486273 Well, unless to demons find a way to reanimate corpses like puppets, I don't think that will be possible considering they were reaped in the prequel and have found rest in the afterlife.
Edit: Wow, this was badly worded.
2486273
2486451
Allow me to explain this:
The only reason why demons exist, why ponies turn insane and why the dead come back to live is Maledictum Insania, which again is directly bound to Nightmare Moon, who again has direct influence to the souls of ponies through Maledictum Insania.
No living creature, no matter if still alive or undead, can work without a soul.
All friends Twilight lost so far were either reaped, which means their souls were forced to leave this world and escape the clutches of the demons.
Or they were caught by the demons and found their souls devoured by them.
In order for a pony to come back as an undead, the soul must still be there.
2486726
In other words, my theory works only if their souls are still in between the plains? Interesting!
2486755
Well everyone who is considered dead at this moment is proven to really be dead.
Meaning that their souls either left this world or were devoured.
If by saying their friends will come back from the dead and they have to fight them that currently still alive friends will die and come back again as undead ponies, then yes.
Anyway, you have to keep in mind that the zombies in this story are still sentinent, since their souls are still there. For an undead pony to become violent, certain circumstances must be given so that they drive themselves to insanity. Among these circumstances is, of course, time that had passed.
You can imagine that being a walking corpse is very painful. The more the bodies decay, the more the pain increases, ultimately driving them mad. But if enough positive influences are given, the undead can have enough mental strenght to slow down this progress a lot.
2486787
Very explainatory! Very explainatory indeed! My hunch just went into water, again... Oh well you're one of the best grimdark writers and your theories are yours so... continue good sir!
2486796
Well i try my best at making everything explainable and logical.
If there is anything else you are uncertain about, just go ahead and ask.
I will most likely be able to explain everything, unless you ask for spoilers.
2486850
Nah, it's cool! I just love guessing what will happen afterwards... see if I am correct or not, and probably have some ideas for the fics I write (even if I'm extremely lazy to finish them).
2486861
I know that feeling... if your story is good and you have something really successful going on, you just dont want it to end.
I had exactly that feeling with the original... I didnt want it to end, but i knew i had to.
At the same time, I was so, so looking forward to get those endings out of my mind i was planning for such a long time.
Ending a story always comes with mixed feelings, but all good things have to end one day.
Its how things go and what the audience expects.
Free hug for another awesome chapter!
2495669
th01.deviantart.net/fs70/200H/i/2012/296/9/3/fluttershy_yay__by_pinkiepiez-d5iq7y6.png
Damm. Forgot MI: The creation had ended so I was still waiting for that to end. Glad I decided to look for this again.
2522387
And I am glad to see you are still around to read my work.
How do you like the sequel so far?
ooh. I thought Twilight was going to suggest that she followed Crystals lead and willingly became a reaper.
Ah well, still a great chapter.