Three days passed after Spike's Dragon Quest. The little dragon was disapointed about what he learnt from those teenagers dragons, were they all jerks? Were they all cruels?
Looks like it's his lucky day: a teen dragon named "King" came to Ponyville to live there, because he couldn't take it anymore to live "with those stupid and jerks dragons".
Spike sees an opportunity to learn more about his race and asks the newcomer to teach and train him. And this is where begins King's Training for Spike, a Dragon Training.
You can find the cover Here
Chapters (6)
Mate, you're not using the quotation marks correctly. You see, in a conversation between two entities, the layout should look a bit more like this:
"Oh hi there guy number one" said guy number two.
"Hello, guy number two!" said guy number one in response.
"So, did you that flying ball of octopus faeces?"
"Hell yeah, that was sweet!"
and so on, so forth. basically, you can't contain more than one speaker in a single pair of quotation marks. Also, the dashes (-) are kind of unnecessary. Hope this helped out a bit.
Alright, I know that English is not your main language, so my advice to you is if you want to get better with your grammatical skills, how to spell words correctly, and how to not misuse words, I advise you seek out an English grammar book and a dictionary. Now that said, I noticed three problems that you may want to fix up.
First one, your going to fast with your story, slow down a bit and describe some of the events better then just dropping it on us and expecting to keep up. Second problem, now I can tell that you are proud of your work and want to show it off, but this is a fanfiction site, not a fanart site, describe your character to us, don't just put a picture of him in your story and say "this is what he looks like" for people will down vote just because you seem to be lazy. Third problem, now tht one scene where Spike and King bicker about if its right for a dragon to like a mare or not, you should have not just repeated "YES IT IS" and "NO IT ISNT" for that can annoy some readers pretty quickly, try just saying: Spike and King bickered amongst themselves about if it is right for a dragon to love a mare, both repeating their opinions, Spike saying that it isn't wrong, and King stating the opposite.: not the best example, but it is better then just making them repeat the same thing over and over.
Now, sorry if it seems I am being harsh, but I realize English is not your first language and i'm just trying to give you tips on how to improve your story if you wish too. Don't give up writing, I can tell you have some talent in it, good luck to you!
Fiuuu... Finally third chapter posted! Hope you'll like it!
Wow! I didn't expect this...
Interesting. Very interesting.
I loved the dragon meeting at the end. Funny!
Angel's very dangerous here...
The story's concept is pretty good, but you may want to just run it through a proofreader. It does wonders, honest.
Fourth chapter! Hell yeah!
Don't replace words with synonyms you found in a thesaurus to sound more educated. "Incult" is indeed a synonym for "uncultured", but it's so esoteric that even well-read native speakers don't use it.
2058946 Okay, I'll correct this. Thanks for the advice.
Did you draw the picture on chapter four yourself? It's pretty damned good artwork!
2069187 Eeyup
2225152
Thanks!
That Queen is a crazy girl, I like her!
And King sure fucked up, writting a song about his mother for his girlfriend. LOL!
I just imagine Rayquaza, Ridley, Alduin, Shenron and Mushu together, I almost die.
Wait, what?
King and RD?
... No, no...
BE A DRAGON!!
This is getting interresting.
2239248 I hope so!
A couple of typos here and there, and sometimes the words used are a little bit out of context. Running this through a spellchecker should solve that fast enough though. Good job on a chapter fairly well done.
2375162 Thank you very much!
2239243
There's not a romance tag...if that helps...
R you Mexican?