April 17th, 2012 “Well, howdy there! Ain’t seen you two ‘round these parts before!” a rather corpulent and elderly lady in her late sixties instantly greeted Applejack and I as we strode into the diner. “Ya’ll come on over here an’ have yourself a sit down. Ya both look mighty hungry.”
“Thank you kindly, ma’am,” I replied as I pulled out a chair and began to sit down. Before I could, however, I received a slap on the backside of my head.
“Where are your manners, youngin’? Ain’t ya gonna pull your lady friend’s chair out for her?”
I looked at AJ, who was trying her best to stifle a laugh, then back to the woman. “Uhhh... yeah.” I stood back up and walked around the table to pull AJ’s chair out for her. Once she was settled I went back over to my side and sat down.
“Now. What can I get you two?” she asked, her tone still just as elated as when we arrived. “We got some specials on desserts today, y’know.”
“AJ?” I looked over at Applejack, who appeared deep in thought about what to eat, since she didn’t respond. I turned back to the woman. “She’s a vegetarian. Got anything that might fit that kinda diet?”
“Sure as sugar we do! We got pancakes, soups, salads, fried taters. You name it, an’ I betcha we got it.”
“Ah think Ah’ll have some tomata soup an’ some salad if’n ya’ll don’t mind.” Applejack said quietly.
“You bet you can sweetie. An’ how about you, boy? What tickles your fancy?”
“Double bacon cheeseburger an’ a Coke please. Coke for her too.” I replied without hesitation.
“You got it. Now you two sit tight an’ I’ll be back with your drinks.” With that, the old lady scribbled away on a notepad she had stashed in her pocket and walked briskly away.
“She’s so nice!” Applejack said once she was out of earshot.
“Yeah... yeah she is. Must be a Kansas thing.”
The diner didn’t have many people inside, maybe six at any given time, all of them likely regulars. They all appeared to be farmers as well, judging by the way they dressed. One of them in particular looked almost like a mannequin. A big muscular fellow with a messy, almost amber-colored head of hair. Everything about him exuded a nagging sense of familiarity, from his stoic appearance to the sprig of hay sticking out of his mouth.
“Hey AJ, stay here for a bit. I’ll be right back.”
“Where ya’ll goin’?” she asked as I stood from my seat.
“Gonna talk to that guy over yonder.” I pointed behind me to the man perched unmoving at the counter.
“Alrighty... have fun?”
I walked over to the beefy mass and took a seat next to him. “Howdy.”
He didn’t say anything, deciding to nod rather than speak.
“Got a name, bud?”
“Mac,” he intoned with a rather deep, yet calm voice.
“Mac, huh? You Irish or somethin’?” I felt like a dumbass with the way I was talking to him.
“Nope.”
“Scottish?”
“Nope,” he replied in his same uninterested manner. I looked back at AJ who was looking all over the diner. I waited for her to look back toward me then I motioned her over. She got up quickly and promptly took a seat next to me.
“Need somethin’?”
“Try talkin’ to this guy, he doesn’t seem to like talkin’ to me all that much.”
“That’s cause you ain’t much fun to talk to,” she quipped. “Howdy stranger.”
“Howdy...”
Applejack looked to me with a smug grin then back to ‘Mac.’ ”What’s yer name?”
“Mac.”
“Quiet feller, huh? Come here often?” I rolled my eyes at that comment; it was beyond cliche.
“Yup.”
“Whaddaya do fer a livin’?”
“Mostly farmin’ an’ dealin’ with apples. Bit o’ this an’ that on the side.” My eyes went wide as he managed more than two words in one response.
“Well Ah’ll be, same here!” She was obviously getting excited although I didn’t see why.
It was then that the old lady came back and handed us our drinks. “Be nice to ‘em Mac, they’re from outta town.” He nodded quietly in response.
“Got a favorite kind o’ apple?”
“Red delicious.”
“Them's good eatin’. Ah prefer them Norlan apples though. So ya got any family?”
She seemed full of questions today.
“Two sisters an’ muh granny. Ain’t seen ‘em in a while though.”
“Ah know how ya feel. Ah ain’t seen muh granny nor muh brother Big Mac in a while.”
At that comment, ‘Mac’ froze up and went bug-eyed as he turned to look at Applejack.
“AJ?” he asked, seeming surprised, however hard that may be. “That you?”
“Ya darn tootin’ it is!” Quick as a whip, Mac stood up and scooped up AJ in a big, bone crunching hug. I hadn’t gotten a very good look at just how tall he was until he was towering over me at nearly seven feet. “Easy there big fella!” she cried out.
“AJ, where ya been all this time?” he asked as he sat my blonde-haired friend back down.
“Ah been lookin’ fer all ya’ll an’ muh friends.” At that moment, it seemed to click in my head. In the show, Applejack had an older brother named Big Mac, and this guy was a Big Mac. Had the same background and everything.
“So, Amy Joe, when did ya’ll decide to get out of Monett an’ come lookin’ for me?”
“Wait, what? Amy Joe?” I couldn’t have heard him right. “Monett? As in Monett, Missouri?”
“Yup,” came the ever-steady reply.
“Oh Jesus Christ. AJ, he ain’t your brother!”
“Now just hold on there. Are you sayin’ this little lady ain’t muh baby sister Amy-Joe Macintosh?” he asked dumbly.
“Not even close, brother,” I said. This earned me a rather forlorn look from the big guy.
“Ah’m sorry. She just seems so much like ‘er an’ what with the same kinda family an’ such, I jus’ put two an’ two together an’ got five.”
“Them’s some fancy mathematics,” I mumbled quietly.
“Don’t you fret none, Ah reckon it was all a simple misunderstandin’,” Applejack replied as she got up and gave him a pat on the shoulder.
Mac sat quietly for a moment, looking a tad forlorn. “Ain’t nothin’.” I took this as my cue to leave and sat back down at our original spot. I watched as Applejack stood next to him a moment longer before she turned back and walked to the table. “Think he’ll be alright?”
“Ah sure hope so,” she replied as she sat down. “Honestly, Ah feel jus’ about the same right now. Ah miss muh brother an’ muh sister an’ Granny an’ everypony else.”
I nodded in response and looked back at Mac. “Well, we’ll find ‘em eventually. Till then, we’re gonna get some food in our bellies and find ourselves a hotel. After all, we’re gonna be in Chicago tomorrow.”
~
We rode down I-70 a bit more until we came upon a small motel complex just outside Topeka, Kansas. It was dark by the time we got there, so I didn’t bother trying to figure out the name of the place. All I wanted to do was go inside, take a shower, and get some sleep. I had paid for one room hoping for two beds, but instead only got one, much to my chagrin. I had even gone so far as to hope that we could end the day without any sort of ‘problems.’ But once again, I was not so lucky.
“Hey, Garrett?” Applejack asked as I unlocked our room door and proceeded to head inside. “Remember when we met an’ you had Rainbow on yer shirt thingy?”
“Yeah, right after you flipped out and we had to run from the farmer with his boom-stick,” I replied as I sat on the bed and proceeded to yank my boots off and hurl them across the room. “Why?”
“Ah was wonderin’...how do ya’ll know about us?”
“Ah shit, that’s right. I never did tell you all that,” I took my phone from my pocket, tapped the YouTube icon and waited for everything to load. Luckily, the motel had WiFi and wasn’t secured. I typed in ‘mlp fim s2e12’ and waited for the results to show up. Once they had loaded I tapped one of the videos that was at least twenty minutes long and let it buffer. I then handed the phone to AJ and tapped the screen to let the video begin. “Watch this while I go take a shower, I’ll answer all of your questions when I get out.”
I left to shower just as Granny Smith started howling about Timberwolves and the episode began playing.
~
Squeaky clean, shaved the scrubbies, everything was in order for the next day. Everything except Applejack’s sanity. As I stepped out of the bathroom, towel wrapped loosely around my waist, I spotted AJ huddled up in the far corner of the room crying. My phone had been hurled at the wall, where it somehow managed to get stuck in the plaster molding. I could still hear the episode playing, although it was only the outro credits.
I rushed toward AJ and knelt down next to her. “Hey, what’s going on? Are you alright?” I shook her shoulder lightly.
“T-timberwolves,” she stammered. “Where’s Ma an’ Pa, Granny?”
“What are you talking about? C’mon, there ain’t nothin’ here ‘cept us two.”
“NO! MAMA! PAPA!” she shrieked as I tried to stand her up. “DON’T GO!”
“APPLEJACK!” I lost my patience and shouted. “CALM DOWN! There’s nothing HERE! See?” She opened her eyes and looked around the room. She was still sputtering and sniveling, but for the moment she seemed to be calming down. “What the hell was that all about?”
She wrapped her arms around my waist and started crying into my shoulder “Them Timberwolves took Ma an’ Pa. That thing you showed me got it all wrong. They took Ma an’ Pa that night, took ‘em into the forest an’ ate ‘em!” She continued crying for a few minutes before she started regaining her composure. “T-they ain’t that skittish. Takes a lot more than bangin’ a bunch o’ pots an’ pans to scare ‘em off.” She sniffed as some mucous started running out of her nose. “Gotta kill one before they start to even think about leavin’. Ma an’ Pa got one of ‘em before they got killed. An’ poor little Apple Bloom wanted to go after ‘em, but we knew there was nothin’ we could do! Broke our hearts to see her breakin’ down like that, she ain’t never lost somepony before, an’ in one night she lost both her parents.”
“Jesus... I’m so sorry.” I really was. I’d never lost somebody close to me before, so I didn’t really know how it felt, but I could still sympathize. “I didn’t know it was like that...” I was nearly speechless at this revelation. “I thought Equestria was all nice an’ safe an’ shit... Damn.” We sat there for a while, no talking, just her crying and me doing my best to console her. It also gave me time to think. Just how much did the show portray that was false? What else could there be that posed a threat to the ponies? Is this why AJ’s parents were never shown in any episodes? All this and more swam fluidly through my noggin, and honestly, it was starting to give me a headache. “AJ?”
“Yeah?”
“I just want you to know, so long as I’m around, ain’t nothin’ gonna hurt you, not even some Timberwolves or frilly dresses.” I offered a smile to go with my joke, though the fact is that it was met with little success. “Now you get to bed, we got a big day tomorrow.” I walked toward the motel door and pulled a cigarette out of my pack. I opened the door and began to light up.
“Hey, Garrett?”
“Right here,” I replied as I exhaled some smoke. “What’s up?”
“Ah just wanna say thank you. For everythin’.”
I turned and walked out of the room, then closed the door behind me. “No. Thank you, Applejack.”
I-70 is a long, long road. Kansas to Illinois is one of the better parts of it, though.
2427879 Yes, yes it is. lol
1. Congratulations, you've reached Korra levels of trolldom
2. Showing a pony an ep of the show, rookie mistake
2427958 1. Huehuehue 2. Have YOu ever had to deal with a pony turned human before? No I didn't think so.
2427975
As a matter of fact, three
fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/023/1/9/human__cmc_by_dateline180-d5sfphw.png
and one of them is going through damn magical puberty... so you may kindly tip your hat to me, the victor of our argument...
...
wait a minute
2428042 Or perhaps a second.
WHAT!?
Applejack's ma & pa was eaten by timberwolves.
That was quit unexpected.
2427975 he has had to deal with THREE filly demo-squads.....HAVE YOU?
great chapter btw. I was like "Yay big mac was found....oh shit."
thumbs.newschoolers.com/index.php?src=http://blacksportsonline.com/index/5yvj8o.gif&size=400x1000
"That's a heart kicker."
2428082 'Filly Demo-Squads'
2428059 Indeed. Ain't I an evil bastard?
2427958 Right Mr. Raiders of the Lost Ark.
You...
You SOOOOON of a BIIIIITCH!
2428191 blogcdn.com/www.urlesque.com/media/2010/04/urkel.gif
Confound all these feels. You push your limits more and more with every chapter. Can't wait to see AJ and RD hook up. They'll be all "dafuq is with these bodies lol."
And you totally named the chapter "Fancy Mathematics." Yesss. I'm so glad I made that recommendation.
2428217
You made me spit take in the middle of Uni class....
WORTH IT!!
global3.memecdn.com/New-Meme-Worth-It_o_123030.jpg
2428217
1. Yes. Yes you did.
2. Totally didn't realise that was a .gif until I stared at it for a few minutes.
2428338 As am I Shane, as am I. lol I like to push limits.
2428396 That's my job, don't you know that?
2428398 1. Hue 2. Huehuehue
2427889 I went on a cross country trip to Delaware from Washington. It rained, I shit you not, the entire fucking time. It was like God said "Hey, they're going to the most retarded stat in the US for a wedding, let's fuck with them, eh?"
2428528 lol both of those states suck, I feel sorry for you, the only good states are the 'southern' states and 'Cowboy states' like Colorado, Arizona, New Mexico, Montana, Nevada, Wyoming, The Dakotas, etc.
2428676 What can I say? I are teh smarterest.
Great chapter as always, but it could used some editing. I found it hard to read without line spaces between paragraphs.
2428710 Yeah, blame GDocs for that, they tend to get things all fuckered up from time to time.
2428186
Hey, I tried my best to prevent that. Scootaloo found Raiders all on her own...
...
I might just be an evil bastard
2428911 lol no problem mate. It's my headcanon too.
2428598 I used to go to Arizona all the time, but I don't anymore due to the condo we had being sold so we could buy our new house.
Also, Washington is a better state for me. I burn like a lobster in less than a minute in states like Arizona and Nevada without something like SPF 500 or higher.
And I was born in Nevada. So, it doubly sucks that I can't stand the heat. But I deal with it the best way possible.
And besides, I live out away from the city in a small town called Enumclaw, where the girls are sweet, and the air smells of bullshit. If I hadn't been labelled the "gay friend" already, I'd probably have had a girlfriend by now that wasn't as shallow as a kiddie pool during a drought.
2427958 If I were to show an episode of the show to a pony, I'd make sure it was one of the most
normalhectic episodes possible, like, for example, the episode Pinkie Keen or Lesson Zero, and that's because all of the mane 6 would have reason to cringe at each. Applejack in PK looks absolutely ridiculous acting so scared from Pinkie's twitchy tail when what's happening doesn't seem too "terrible". And Rarity would groan at the way LZ portrays her, or get in a huff over how it didn't correctly show how hard it was to find that ribbon.Sisterhooves Social would be a good one for the CMC, AJ or Rarity. If the CMC were to watch it, Scoots could even have a line saying "Hey, Rainbow Dash and I were in that, too!" We know that there are episodes that are out of order in the seasons, such as Winter Wrap Up and Fall Weather Friends, so why couldn't Sleepless in Ponyville, in their actual "real" timeline happen much earlier than its actual air date in Season 3, and who's to say that Sweetie didn't use SiP's events as a reason why Rarity should do the Social? There are so many possibilities, and I completely forgot the original topic, but I don't care! Hahahaha! I'll just keep typing until I can't any longer!!!
2429039 I'm sorry but that last bit made me laugh a bit. Far as the other stuff goes, just need to get more sun. :P
2429054 I have a rather well developed tan. I've been getting moderate amounts of sun for years now, and my skin retains a bit of the color it gets after burning.
And as for the gay friend thing, apparently you're not straight if you share your feelings and act respectable towards women.
2429080 Such is life in Soviet America my friend. Move to Colorado! It's nice an dry down here!
2429089 Only if you get me a chick who would like me for who I am, and not dislike me for my terrible, ugly-as-all-hell body.
2429133 lol dude, if you do come down here I'll have to put you on coloradobronies.org, I'm sure you could easily find a nice girl there.
2429151 lol, yeah. We're getting a new employee at the bakery I'm at soon, and she's apparently a brony.
2429203 lol according to whom?
2429217 According to one of the other employees. They poke fun at me sometimes over my liking the show, and ask me when am I going to move to Capitol Hill (You know Chinatown? Well, CH is pretty much Gaytown), so they actually put that in the notes on how her interview went.
"She's good with the mixer, she knows how to work with Marzipan, oh, and tell Mac that she's also a brony!"
2429231 Ah lol, that makes sense XD
2429245 AYE~!
Ze Chaptah Has DE POWAH!!
2428850 Riiiight...
Well that part with Mac was awkward... if it was a tv show, I wouldn't be able to watch that scene out of embarrassment.
Dah hell mang, is every episode of mlp wrong? Instead everything was just a bad day where somepony died or almost died. (Except with Rarity)
I would still go to Equestria.
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Not sure how I feel about the fact that the show deviates so much from 'real' Equestria in these stories. There's this nagging feeling that these ponies aren't even the ones from the show, just very similiar, kinda like that Mac dude was just like the show Mac, but not.
2430772 Not sure what to make of that comment. lol
2430956 The PF Collab Universe 'canon' basically says that the show's portrayal of things are far more innocent than they actually are. Makes for better drama I s'pose. Far as the Mac things go, I wanted to get people's hopes up then crush them.
2431243 The Mac thing was funny for me because at first when neither "you" nor AJ recognized him, I thought that he was obviously not going to be Mac, just someone similiar. I guess I expected either of "you" to recognize him immidiately. Even the voices should've been a dead giveaway a sentence in. Not to mention the freaking name and family details and such. And then when you actually went and pretended it was him, I was just "whuh? boy are they all acting slow today". I was actually kinda relieved he turned out to not be Mac.
If the ponies all have earth-alternates, I will flip a shit. There would be so much confusion.
...That is all.
I did not see the Timberwolf thing coming, that definitely surprised me... poor Applejack. Also it might be problematic that AJ threw the only phone you have through the wall.
As for the rest, I have to stick with Ohio myself. It's where I was born and raised, not to mention I'm a buckeye fan for life
2439097 Fuck yeah! lol
2444626 Jes, dem Timberwolves. The phone situation however... We'll see.
So wait, AJ's parents died DURING season 2, episode 12?
The rest of the episode seems a little bit impossible if that were to happen. More likely the whole damn thing would have been a funeral. Zap Apples or not, they all probably would have had other priorities, not to mention Cheerilee would have to be an absolutely heartless monster to bring up 'Family Appreciation Day' mere days after Apple Bloom's parents died...
Otherwise great chapter. Loved the total fake out with Big Macintosh. I raised an eyebrow when the old waitress knew him so well, mentioning that Garrett and AJ were from out of town while she seemed familiar with him, but you did a real nice job of toying with my expectations. Good show.
2510732 I doubt they're dead. We just haven't met them yet
2583232
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2429331 This string of comments is now 16 long.
I dunno.
The show doesn't portray anything false as it is a specific version of the reality of equestria.
I believe, and so should every author/fan since there can be really fked up and grim dark stories of MLP (aka Cupcakes), that there are different realities of the existing equestria, each in a unique universe, which are part of a Multiverse. The multiverse relates to the different realities of equestria much like the R-34 of the Internet:
Internet R-34: If it exists, there is Porn of it.
Multiverse R-34: If it exists, there are {n} variants of alternate universes of it.
I guess what important is in Applejack's case here, would be the 'grade of alternation' per universe.
Example: in universe A, equestria exists as an animated TV show (FiM).
Then in universe B, equestria exists in a different plane of existence, physically or in flesh and blood as some say. There are no humans, no earth, just equestria and as you see it in the show.
We could rate universe B as AG1 (Alteration Grade 1), which has the reality of equestria in a different plane of existence, mirroring to the show (low violence, no gore, all events happen according to the episodes.). It's practically the show embodies the reality of universe B as a physical copy...if that makes any sense, forgive me if I structured this wrong since I am german... and a bit drunk.
Anyway lets jump to universe 9F (Hexadecimal) which is rated AG4. Why AG4? Because the universe 9F has equestria, in a physical plane, not as a TV series (hence AG+1). This equestria is identical to the show regarding the 'main plot' and the characters of FiM (EoH, mane 6, Celly and Luna form a diarchy), but the details are all different such as certain events in different episodes, even those you don't see (Death of AJ's parents, hence AG+1). Then the violence and gore factor is higher, while unnatural death is possible (Death while fighting, Death through injuries or serious wounds, hence AG+1). Finally the environment is different, having a more aggressive nature, with Timberwolves being real beasts who won't be shooed away by some noise (another AG+1).
So concluding, I would rate the universe where AJ from Ponyfall comes from around an AG4.5, which means same base equestria, base storyline, same basic personalities of the mane 6. But all the other details I mentioned above are different. The +0,5 is for the characters being slightly mentally scarred.
But then...
There are also the AG5-10 universes, such as 'Cupcakes' for example where a derranged Pinkie Pie kills off her friends in a horrifying way. In that universe the base story elements are broken (friendship, trust, love, the goodwill nature of the Elements of Harmony etc.) All the characters alive get mentally scarred for life and have changed personalities, and gain a new gruesome perception of reality, making the concept of FiM (the TV show) null and void. Therefore I'd rank it on a high AG between 8 and 10, because basic important principals differ greatly and the characters foundations are whacked, with pinkie being a psychopath.
In the end this AJ, as well as the Twilight, RD, Pinkie, Fluttershy and Rarity of the other Fall's stories, are just from a different universe with a different reality then the one shown in the TV-Series. Though this doesn't mean that the series is false, as it is it's own reality of equestria and basically our 'yardstick' to judge the grade of alteration of alternate or parallel universes containing a reality version of equestria.
That there is the best piece of multiverse education I've written while being half drunk, now I'll shut up! :/