Friendship is Equal to or Greater than Magic

by Fanon Canon

Ditzy Doolally

"Incoming!" A certain Pegasus with a light grey coat with a bright yellow mane yelled down below her to a certain unicorn with a bright white coat and dark purple mane.

The unicorn looked up at the large object rapidly coming her way and moved to the side, fully aware of the mess a crashing Pegasus could do to her brilliantly coloured coat. However, to the surprise of both ponies, the grey Pegasus landed in an orderly fashion, coming to halt right in front of the unicorn without so much as a leaf or feather rustled, in a manner that was very unlike her, which amused her but made the unicorn awfully irritated.

"Nevermind, eh?" She asked sarcastically of the Pegasus.

"I just don't know what went right." The Pegasus replied in silent shock.

"Good for you then." The unicorn responded. "Now if you don't mind." She made way to past the Pegasus by for in her eyes, their little interaction was concluded. The Pegasus however didn't seem to think so and thus interrupted her as she went about her way.

"Hey wait a sec." The winged mare pleaded, only serving to further irritate the unicorn.

"Yes." She replied in an attempt to remain calm.

"Where you going?" The Pegasus asked in a cheerful manner of bliss.

"Why would you want to know?" The unicorn asked in return.

"Because I think I can guess where it is." The Pegasus answered, again with a strange tone of perkiness to her.

"Well, if you can do that." The unicorn began. "Then why did you need to ask me?"

"Because." The Pegasus explained. "I needed to see if I've got the right mare."

"Okay then." The unicorn challenged. "Prove I'm the right mare then."

"Ahem." The Pegasus cleared her throat in response to the unicorn's challenge. "You are going to… Town Hall, correct?"

"Correct." The unicorn admitted, but found nothing remotely special about the Pegasus yet.

"And your name is… Rarity." The Pegasus continued.

"Yes." Rarity declared, now a little more intrigued now. "And you, I wanna say… Derpy, or Ditzy." For some reason she had many names for the mare she had never met before.

"Oh please." The Pegasus pleaded of Rarity. "Feel free to call me whatever strikes your fancy, it's not like I actually have a name anyway."

"Okay." Rarity spoke suspiciously. "What do you suggest, then?"

"Well I always like to be called by whatever profession I'm currently in at the moment." The still nameless Pegasus replied.

"So what profession are you in at the moment, then?" Rarity asked slight frustration rising in her at how much of her time this Pegasus was wasting.

"Well right now, I have the honorary position of mailmare." The Pegasus replied. "But soon, I'll be moving onto ambassador."

"Okay fine then, Mailmare it is." Rarity spoke, not wanting to think of the representation of Ponyville this Pegasus would give as ambassador. "Now what is it you want?"

"Ahem." The Mailmare announced, before pulling out a letter from the courier bag slung across her back, rolling it up and reading it to Rarity. "Dearest Rarity, Fashion Designer, Storeowner and Seamstress. Your presence is requested of the upmost urgency, at the Ponyville Town Hall. One of your dear friends, a dragon by the name of Spike has recently visited courtesy of one Dr Time Turner MD Ph.D. MAcc DT DMM DC. It is of the upmost urgency that you present yourself at Town Hall to retrieve your friend immediately. Yours faithfully, student to Her Royal Ruler of Equestria Princess Celestia and Librarian of Ponyville Library Twilight Sparkle."

The Mailmare finished her address to Rarity, expecting to find a look of urgency on her face as she gave hurried thanks and rushed off to Town Hall. But instead, a very different look of utter bewilderment and resentment appeared on Rarity's face, contort in frustration.

"Is something wrong?" The Mailmare asked eagerly.

"Is this a joke?" Rarity uttered voice thick with disbelief.

"I don't think so." The Mailmare replied. "But if it is, then ha ha ha…"

Her brief attempt at humour was lost on the unicorn, who was still looking very frustrated.

"I already know that!" She finally yelled, stunning the Mailmare.

"You do." The Mailmare replied quietly.

"Yes I do! That's exactly what Twilight just sent me to do, what did you thought I was going to Town Hall, for?" Rarity yelled irritably.

"Well, all I was asked to do was deliver a letter to one Rarity going to Town Hall." The Mailmare did her best to reply confidently.

"Well good for you then." Rarity retorted full of sarcasm in her voice. "Now if there isn't anything else…"

"Wait actually there is!" The Mailmare was suddenly reminded of something and delved into her courier bag once again to retrieve another letter.

"Ahem." She announced once again opening it and beginning." Dear-oh."

"The same letter." Rarity took a half-hearted guess.

"No actually." The Mailmare replied. "It's just; well I'm not sure if I can read it."

"Well give it here and let me have a look." Rarity requested.

"I cannot do that, it's against protocols." The Mailmare pleaded in disbelief.

"If it's addressed to me, then by rights it's really mine to read." Rarity explained.

The Mailmare was silent at her proposal.

"Oh yeah." She finally said. "Here you go."

"Thank you." Rarity replied, again with deep sarcasm.

Using her horn to magically levitate in front of her she began to read.

Dear Big Dumb Sister,

I just can't believe your big dumb self, first you go off on some dumb quest to find some dumb diamond, then you go and dumb teleport like you're some kind of dumb alicorn, then your dumb dragon friend comes looking for your dumb self and now apparently your dumb friends the dumb cause of whatever'a causing all the dumb ponies round here to dumb act up. You better dumb run because when I catch up with your dumb self I am going to be so dumb mad!

Your Little Dumb Sister.

"Well's if there's nothing else." The Mailmare began. "I think I'll be off then." Rarity could detect a hint of awkwardness in the way she spoke, before she spread her wings and took off for the skies again, a few loose letters from her courier bag scattering in the wind in her wake.

"Dummy." Rarity mused to herself, before burning the letter hovering in front of her to a crisp, and resuming her course for Town Hall once again.