iloveyouderpy
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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That cover image will draw anyone to this story.
Interesting...
I'll definitely be following this...
Wow that was fantastic, nice job!
Poor Sweetie Belle.
Ha, just joking grimdark has yet to evoke a emotion from me.
i just happy it wasnt applejack and applebloom
1383077 Thank you
I don't know why bit this tucked up kind of shit really beets my interest. I love the grimdark mop for some reason and " Ilike it" the words of LMR
I loved that last part I love you too. So what happens next? Rarity in the nuthouse? Or dashie's dental appointment?
1383171 next is Dashie's dental appointment
Well, I'm not sure whether or not to be disgusted or impressed. Either way, it was good in a bad and creepy and slightly unsettling way. But you can write. Good work... I guess?
Have a like.
Wow, this is just.... bad. There's no other word for it. I don't think I even have to mention that Rarity is so ooc that she might as well not be Rarity. Rarity would never be so cruel to Sweetie, and would certainly not get so angry over a dress that she would brutally slaughter her sister. Forgive the comparison, but just like in Cupcakes, the villain has no reason at all to do what they do, and we are given no explanation as to why they did it either. And some of the lines are so ridiculously cliche that I quite literally burst out laughing when I read them, like, '“Rarity, come play with me.”' and '“You killed me.”'. This first story is just ridiculous. And why does dead/undead/alive/demon/whatevershewas Sweetie switch from being so passive and almost sad for several days, the suddenly proclaim that Rarity would burn for what she did? And Rarity didn't even really get that punishment, was the madness supposed to be the punishment or something? Also, if Rarity is so bloody depressed about what she did, then she would have revealed what she did and accept whatever punishment was given, and she certainly wouldn't have tried to cover up the crime just to present a dress to a fashion critic. Rarity certainly wouldn't do any of that, but this Rarity is not at all like the actual Rarity. I'm sorry if I was overly rude or cruel, but this story is just, bad. And if you want to hate me for all of eternity for this, thats fine, I guess I kind of deserve it. But, I very much hope that rather than earning your unending ire, that this will somehow help you in your writing, and I certainly see potential. Your scenes were fairly well written, and the pacing was very good as well, but some things just need to be addressed.
1383198 Very appreciated
1383218 Maybe Rarity was just having a bad day. *ponyshrug*
Grimdarks make me laugh and happy
Well done! A nice and nasty little piece of Cryptkeeperish tale telling. Have you considered a framing mechanism?
1383218 it's guilt that's making her hallucinate all this stuff. And it's just a fun written grimdark that is to get people ready for Nightmare Night. Not to be taken seriously, just to be read for fun. But I respect your opinion
1383240 ty
1383218 I think you don't have that ability to understand how far a human or pony can go through before they can snap and go all feral. LOOK AT THAT ZOMBIE GUY FOR INSTANCE. True he was on drugs but he ate a guys face off. You may find grimdark funny and maybe scrappy but I beloved that the author really captured the events leading up to her eventual orbital free fall from grace. Its grimdark. shit isn't supposta be cannon. And it is all damn disturbing. Think of the Arkham asylum patients. The joker is phycotic and grindstone is just that... hitches be trippin
1383295 wow, thanks bro
1383189 yes... wait.. NO CUPCAKES PLEASE. rainbow downy desecrate to die by an oral hygenist. Maybe cause some certain bunch of Pegasus who bullied fluttershy
1383248 Well, I suppose I should shoulder some of the blame myself. Thanks for the clarification, and I think the story actually make a lot more sense now that I realize that. And I think I tried to take it a bit too seriously, and refused to see it in the light of a not to serious, fun little grimdark. Now that I realize these things, I must say, this story wasn't really as bad as I thought it was. For what it is, it's actually pretty good. The insanity and guilt clears up a lot of the issues I had with the characterization and other details. I must admit, I'm actually kind of starting to like it. I think I'll be following this, and seeing where it goes in later chapters. So, overall, my opinion has massively changed, and I'm surprised that I didn't realize the hallucinations part on my own. I will definitely be checking into your otherr stuff, and I think I might want to see what other stuff you make. If I daresay, you actually seem like a very good author.
1383308 It's like a mixture of Cupcakes and Rainbow Factory
1383316 what did derpy lover say that I didn't?
1383316 thankyou, unfortunately that's the end of that story and moving on to another short. It's a collection of short stories. Up next: Rainbow Dash goes to the Dentist
1383305 I like talking g about psychotic stories
1383316 also a lot of my fanfictions are not finished so pardon that. After this collection im going back and completing them all
1383328
there goes cloudsdale
and the rest of my sanity
1383352 lol, the story is already written. All that needs to be done is it needs to be typed up and then edited. Should be done by next week
1383331 Its not that he/she said something you didn't, its just that they pointed out what I had not realized as I read the story, and I immediatly went to correct myself before I even noticed your comment. What you said also make a lot of sense, and I really do understand the story better now, so a thanks to both of you.
1383340 Well, while I was a little curious as to what would happen next, this one did have a fairly solid wrap-up. I'll be reading that next chapter for sure.
I am disturbed and intriged by that cover picture. What is it a picture of?
*adds fic to read list against better judgement*
EDIT:
IT'S A MANNEQUIN, ISN'T IT?!
1383401 read little miss rarity Nd find out for yourself
1383401 just had the picture in my folder and was slightly relevant
1383412 Oh no... it's nighttime... do I dare?
*clicks to read fic*
Yes, I dare.
1383429 have fun
don't let the insanity bite
yes yes yes continue please
Ladies and Gentlemen... The stages of Rarities mind(with different pony faces)
Beginning:
Afterward:
Raged:
Afterward:
Sweetie's Apperance:
Ending:
I truly hate grim dark, but you have several things going for you.
1. It's October and Halloween and junk.
2. An anthology of horror stories with twist endings brings to mind: the movie- Creep Show, the show- Tales From the Crypt and the gory comics done by EC Comics of the 50's which included Tales From the Crypt, The Vault of Horror and Shock Suspense Stories.
3. You don't take this too seriously. Yeah, there will most likely be some OCC moments, but meh.
4. The cover art is a real attention grabber.
As for the chapter it really does feel like a lost episode of Tales From the Crypt with that twist ending all you needed was the rotting corpse of Granny Smith to speak in terrible puns and introduce each story.
Of course, whenever I think about a talking corpse I think of American Werewolf in London.
I love Halloween/Nightmare Night. I can't wait see the rest of the anthology. I hope RD's dentstis isn't as crasy as this guy.
1383896 The story is bipolar
1383915 love little shop of horrors
1383218
Wow, your lack of imagination disappoints. This story is a horror fic... which means there is nothing here that makes this anything like the original series (like there would be gruesome death in MLP). I believe the author was using great imagination with the use of Sweetie Bell's clumsy destructiveness that constantly irritates Rarity (similar to the OG series). He takes it a step farther where she just snaps, kills, then regains her sanity just enough to feel the guilt that drives her back to insanity (and you are correct that Rarity would never do these acts......in the original show which this is not) Sweetie's return is nothing less than a ghost that is a figment of Rarities imagination...of course she is going to be good and evil at the same time as Rarity's imagination is going to see her sister as the wonderful little filly she was, as well as the source of her punishment.
Obviously you have no appreciation for the hokie nature of the common B grade horror genre.
That said. I do appreciate how you gave the kudos to the authors potential, and good job pointing out their strengths as well as good qualities.
While I will disagree with your assessment and remain disappointed with your flawed train of thought (of course this is just my opinion). I will never fault anyone for having a mind and stating what they feel is wrong so long as they are not degrading the attempt made at a story (which you truly haven't done here). I do not wish to start an argument (at least not a nasty argument), but if you would like to have friendly banter on this topic, I am more than willing to join you in an appropriate forum....just not here.
Cheers Mate!
1383120
There is much room for improvement........but you seem to have a good handle on the ideals behind the basic "ghost story"....good job!
I will be following this in anticipation for the ensuing carnage in future instalments. It does me Galic heart good to see some good old fashioned innocent death an' destruction!
Cheers!
1386111 I watch a lot of horror movies and read a lot of Stephen King :P
1387935
Stephen King is a God of the genre! He has one of the most twisted minds....and his humor is so sly.......one of my faves!
I too love horror movies....especially the goofy B grades like Evil Dead series, and the retarded zombie flicks.....the classics are great.... wolf man, thing, creature from the black lagoon, frankie....love them all.....But I absolutely HATE what they have done to vampires....they went from one of the most feared superstitions....to a sparkling sex symbol! I mean WTF!?
I mean whos gonna be scared of a Valley Girl pretty boy whos is "Like I totaly can't be out in the day cause I sparkle in the sunlight...nnnnn!
Enough rants.....Cheers!
1388939 lol, I'm a huge fan of the serial killer genre, but I like just about any horror movie. Even the ones people find awful I always find something in them that makes me love them. Horror is best genre.
This story reminds me of Edgar Allan Poes story ''The Telltale Heart''. Are you by any chance a fan of him?
1396389 Edgar Allen Poe is the shit
*shiver*
1401345 so I take it disturbed you. That's good.
Write more please! This scared me!
1410478 more is coming ;) actually a new story will be posted today under as a new chapter
1411706
YAY! will it involve more insanity? (Thats what scares me most besides strands of other peoples hair... xD)