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This story is a sequel to Sleepless
Struck by grief after her daughter's death, Berry Punch tries to overcome her alcoholism.
Click here for sequels reading order, TVTropes page and other info.
Russian translation by repitter:
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I started getting a Lovecraftian vibe somewhere a little bit before Fleur was attacked. After that, it shot further and further into that territory of horror, complete with Nothing Is Scarier. When I first heard of a story about Berry in the aftermath of Sleepless, I most certainly didn't expect this. Not that I'm complaining, as this was pretty cool. Nicely done.
Who knew that one little filly's actions could have such long-lasting effects...
So this is the sequel to Sleepless or will it be unveiled later when Manehattan Blues is done?
4811942
There'll be another sequel taking place soon after the epilogue of Sleepless in which Diamond Tiara and Babs Seed meet.
4810766
Oh yeah... Things can escalate quickly, especially when there's an eldritch abomination nearby...
4810718
Thanks
ib
I wonder if there is some big conclusion you are leading towards with the combined efforts of these connected works. Can't wait to find out!
Also perhaps it would sound better phrased 'Her free will is what's killing her!'
I wasn't expected that. See ya in the conclusion.
Well that went as well as I would of expected the implications of what COULD of happened in Swarm of the Century episode. Twilight really lucked out in that those parasprites didn't devour pony flesh.
That ending was far from expected though. I was expecting Twilight to have some gui;guilt that she had been responsible for what happened to Berry for not helping.
Great side story. I'd like to see a story on Dusk Dancer someday. Why she moved to Ponyville, how she felt about ponies before all the drama and then learning some pony wanted to burn you alive just because you're different. Your bat-ponies need more stories.
4982987
Hmm, I may write such a side story one day...
Swarm of the Century was my first idea. Then I started to think where in Canterlot Berry could hide... Then what else could be hiding there... (the result is something between The Case of Charles Dexter Ward and one of the monsters from Andrey Dyakov's Towards The Light).
4983159 Yeah, that mountain did come much later on down the road. And the cursed souls of greedy unicorns got stuck down there too. Maybe a throwback to that Crsytal Wizard that created the crystal ponies? Who knows. But those caves, that mountain, could hide so many ancient evils and Celestia could be none the wiser.
Much story potential for that place.
The story was fated to be lovecraftian as soon as it was told in the form of a journal left by someone who encountered unspeakable horror. Not that I'm complaining, that was great
Wow, talk about your genre shift. Nice and dark, though, even if the prose is a little clunky.
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I was aiming for lovecraftian feeling here. Though the shift was rather temporary (but Manehattan Blues has yet another one...)
4982987
That's horrifying
7593612
A propos Swarm of the Century (grimdark):
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/9/23/104496__twilight+sparkle_rainbow+dash_grimdark_apple_grotesque_death_parasprite_bad+end_skeleton_dead.png
7749805
It sounds vampiric enough (and I didn't want to learn Romanian just for the fic).
Is it a Tak from Desperation?
It's looks familiar.
You can has review!
Interesting read. Not nearly as horrifyingly fun as Sleepless, but I really liked the eldritch aspect to it.
The buildup to the caves scene dragged on a little, but it's nothing too bad given that this is only 4k words.
And the moral of this story?
Except as a way to sort things, Twilight's magic is useless.
11357249
Tbh, a lot of plots in fanfics require nerfing magic in order to work.
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I mean, I understand the nerfing.
It's when her spells blow up illogically that I have a problem. It's the same issue as in "Stop The Bats!"
You can have her magic blow up in a predictable way "Swarm Of The Century" "Every Little Thing She Does". etc.
But when every other time her magic inexplicably turns someone into a cannibal, I lose interest.
As alternative you could have Berry go insane with grief, or have her turn to other distractions when she can no longer stand to look at alcohol.
Then it's less "Twilight Sparkle is a demon lord in disguise", and more that "even magic can't fix everything without creating other problems".
Put it this way: If you lived in a universe where there was a 90% chance that if you turned the keys in a car's ignition it would explode, would you ever set foot in a automobile again?
Well that got significantly darker than I expected.