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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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What? Two chapters in one day? Eeeyup!
From here on, things will go crazy!
Slight gore added... What's next on the Checklist? Sex?
This won't end well... For Tyler!
Well considering Tyler stays in Canterlot now to meditate i don't mind :)
Would be fun actually him with the ''two most gorgeous sisters the land has to offer''.
I guess Tyler is also immortal considering his heritage being part alicorn part human.
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No can do, but due to further adventures, he will return to Canterlot at the GGG... There the answer will be given. Until then... Patience... Zap apples don't grow in a day, you know?
Well this was an epic chapter.
I wonder who his certain someone will be. Two of the mane six have developing feelings for him, and the princesses seem to be interested in him.
Looking forword to the net chapter.
Good luck with all of your endeavors.
That escalated quickly.
I love the girls reactions to his lust for battle. Up to this point (assuming the previous void beast battles were also like fights on the show) have all been bloodless, or censored magic beat downs. I wonder if they will be traumatized by seeing this side of him/humans. Excellent chapter! Truthfully I cant wait to read his answer to 'why we fight' :)
this story, it deserves a stache-shaped CAKE
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Not gory enough? I said slight gore. Ripping out limbs and jaws with bare hands so that muscles and veins snap and tear apart and the one who did it is sprinkled in blood comes close to that if you ask me... Also, when fighting for your life, you don't actually watch the gory cruelty your comrade does beside you in awe when there still are beasts around, do you?
It would have been traumatizing if there was one beast and he dismembered it limb by limb. You know, over the edge cruelty to an already defeated enemy...
Not going to happen anytime soon.
I must say the suspense on who is going to be dating is killing me for you have left so many open possiblitys, oh but wait will he only be with one or are you going to do the herd thing so he may have mutipule marefriends. i must say i like the later of the possiblitys. also is if has more than one the adventures can be greater as well as the romance. but this is only a suggestion.
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Actually, music is my thing for inspiration. Especially movie music And since i have planned this and that already and wrote it out, all what's left to be done is filling out the plotholes connecting the dots. Like that, I won't get stuck easily and can get a nice built-up. You might ask yourself why I didn't make bodily contact with Tyler and magic as of yet. Others tend to levitate humans left and right, not me. I have plans with magic. It will make a nice twist. You're going to love it!
1325156 with the way you write i do believe i will love it good sir.
KEEP up the good work, and i can't wait till the next chapter.
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Really? That is too bad. Was hoping she would also start to develop feelings for him.
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Maybe...
But seriously... A guy coming to Equestria and every mare wanting him on sight? Scary for him, funny for us, but plotwise a nightmare. And yes, that was a nice pun.
Yet I can tell you this: Celestia will help Tyler out a bit in terms of relationship. And while doing so, she will tease him a bit.
Let's just say she has her ways...
I really like that story. You explained the magic, have an interesting character and exiting shit happens.
And that's where I miss the love button...
I am afraid you misunderstood. There was plenty of gore. What I had meant by my last post, was that since every battle in the TV show is bloodless, he may have traumatized them slightly. Become the source of their nightmares more then the dragon that is gone. But either way, good chapter!
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That is true. Though as of now only two ponies have developing feelings for the character. You haven't shown any any the others developing feelings for him.
Anyway, good luck with the story, and hope to read more soon.
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I see... Yes, that's true, they might become afraid of him. Yet he never used his power to harm a pony, so there you go. Although he had reason to yell at Rainbow the one time, he simply went away. They would fear him if they wouldn't know anything about him. but since they knew him.But on the other hand, he only becomes a sadist once he fights and his life is in danger... as of yet. Maybe I'll introduce him to Pinkamina someday...
C'mon Discord paired up with a princess!!!!
3 things One damn kicking ass like a boss Two sleep is for the weak Three dat human ass
I actually expected that Tyler became a dragonborn there, with all of those Skyrim references.
Erg Void Dragon [I wouldn't want my character from AdventureQuest to be in this story [My Character's loyal pet is a baby Void Dragon]
Regretting reading this story, even though the rushing is mentioned, it is still way too much and makes the story unentertaining
Nope! 'Tis Righteous Fury!
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20101128175748/40kfanfiction/images/6/65/AQUILA.jpeg
The only reason this feels a bit rushed is because it skips a fair bit of time. This is mostly because no one wants to read about some guy's walk to and from a farm everyday and him putting apples into a cart. Woop-de-do. That, and no villain in real life is going to just sit around doing nothing for months or something twirling his mustache. No, he/she/it is going to get their show on the road, like the gem did at its first opportunity.
You think he's something? Then I'd love to see your faces if a soldier or ancient warrior was summoned. HFY!
Well, there must be "something" (heh) in its mouth for channeling the flames. So, he can probably pull a Harry vs Basilisk on it.
Try anything and you die. He'd see it as a betrayal and would take violently to it.
Pfft, like they ever did anything! Except get their asses kicked, but that shouldn't be something for them to be proud of.
Blueblood is going to wish you'd never said that.
If you give up your human spirit, courage, honor, and integrity to be like the ponies, I will *BLAM!* you! Getting along with them is fine; trying to be like them is not. You are a human, not a pony, remember that.
Because resources on our world are actually hard to come-by. Because each acre of land we take from someone else means a few less of our children we must watch wither from bloody sicknesses. Because riches can be traded for what we needed to ensure better chances of survival for ourselves and those we love. Because we want others to have a happy afterlife (religious wars). For so many more reasons. Above all, humans fight because it is necessary. The ponies want for, and need, nothing. They couldn't possibly imagine what it is like to live on Earth. Even in modern times it is still a struggle for survival everyday. We fight because we believe that our pain and suffering will have meaning in the end.
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"Tilerions! He is the dragonborn!"
Oh urm..... a bit rushed this chapter, and a bit like an ending to book I, I was worried it was going to roll the credits after this chapter, but I guess not... well Onwards and Upwards and Bye!
Oh, I'm sorry that void dragon shouldn't have died? because slamming YOUR FRIEND into a mountain and planning to take over the world leaves room for the dragon's death, not your friend's well being.
May sound better if phrased like "But there’s one thing you bastard overlooked about us humans... We stare in the face of death and laugh, so go ahead make my day"*smashes jem* or
"We humans have gone from throwing spears to dropping bombs that can level cities, we change and evolve to fit the time, and I'll change myself into the hero these ponies need!" or
"Huh, yea whatever now dig the wax out of your ears because I've got something to say! He takes the blazing sun in his bare hands and endures the searing heat. A man's man sustained by strength of will. When you hear of the great Tyler they're talking about me! You'd best remember that!"
Throne, that was intense!
I'm sorry to say, but this story has some major flaw which for me, makes it unreadable. The pacing is terrible and far to quick, you have Gary Stu'ed this character so bad you could replace his name with 'generic good guy' and there would be no difference, also you have had every character that has interacted with him have no conflict whatsoever and accept him after speak once. Not to mention how every mare seems to love him for little reason more than he's overly charming mature and intelligent. I can tell you there is no way a person like this HAS or ever WILL exist. I'm sorry but this story needs to be completely rewritten and given the factors I have made issue with before I ever was to try reading this again.
I'm loving this story more and more
7435526 Dude, your profile pic fuckin defines the protagonist
7516479 thanks
7390410 I know, right?
The Gary Stu is strong in this one...
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Hey, you made it to the point of the critical mass. From here on, it gets better.
That was epic read ,Ihope he makes a herd.
I'm gonna be honest here,....I'm kinda disappointed in this chapter. I dont mean to throw you down bro but this chapter just...sucks. all the reasons have been already mentioned above by other readers. I'm gonna read a little bit more, and hope it gets better. Sorry dude.
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Yeah, my infamous first 4 chapters… Luckily the story gets better after this. MUCH better…
espero que mejore desde aquí porque hasta ahora es un poco aburrido
Oh damn, that felt like watching a movie on 10 times the normal speed. Also why does everyone show up suddenly and without context??
If its canon, then I have to give credit to tyler for not going insane in the face of the disregard of regular travel instead of spontaneous appearances and randomness of the ponies around him.
I think I know who's going to be the "void creature's controller" or whatever it was...
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Technically, the Mary Sue (or for this context, the Gary Stu) is more of a symptom of poor writing rather than character troupe. While yes, he may tick the boxes of that symptom but with the writing slowly improving there is hope for his character just yet.
This chapter was unbelievable, you've tick everysingle cliche I have ever read, in a single chapter you've manage to redefine what generic means. I've seen people comment similar thing and you've stated it gets better so I'll read 5 more chapters to see where it goes. But really mate what this story need desperately is conflict, character flaws, adversity, and a redefinition of all the characters.
I see a lot of complaints about this chapter and the story in general and honestly I find them tiresome. Little nitpicks blown out of proportion and complaints about their not being enough conflicts or character flaws I've been reading the same story they all have and haven't found myself able to agree with a single observation or complaint so far maybe my standards are lower or perhaps I'm just not as well versed in the nuances of story structures but I just don't feel that this story is being held to a fair standard its like people came here expecting a season of game of thrones and got well a season of My little pony cause that's exactly what every chapter has felt like to me up to this point an episode of my little pony and that should be good enough if you ask me.
I don’t think this is Gary Stu by the strict definition. MC has undergone training and troubles, there was explanation for his changes, and he has undergone progress from his camping trip pre transportation.
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So far, I have found the slice of life elements the better written, but author indicated that the story improves from here. I will give it a chance.
(After rereading at least 4 times) Whut? There's only 5 here, from introducing to concluding the list of labors, there's only like five sentences, with some specification clauses stuffed in between using colons :
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1. I entrust you with the wellbeing of Ponyville, to guard it and to hold it dear.
2. Treat Equestrians with the dignity and honor they deserve.
3. Use your newfound strength to protect our beloved subjects
4. fight any threat scheming against the harmony of this land, foreign and domestic
5. Learn the ways of Equestria so that every citizen shall see you as a shining example.
6. And finally… Find a certain someone dear to you