271
5,230
For as long as Spike could remember, his dreams had been filled with fire and snow.
But when simple dreams take a darker turn, and nightmares are revealed as ancient memories, Spike must overcome his own past to save the world from an evil that refuses to stay buried.
Black wings unfurl over Equestria.
This is well written, and pretty creative that you adapted the skyrim lore into MLP.
I can't help but think that if Alduin was sent to Equestria in any form he would just annihilate everything with ease.
I'm anxious to see whether or not when he does become full once he more just looks at Celly and says "This is it? Really? I'm a dragon, ho."
Glad to see your continuing this. The focus on the Elements and Nightmare Moon's return was an unexpected but not unwanted shift. For something staring him this didn't mention Alduin a lot, but I see how it was needed in this case.
I take it the next chapter will be Spike's hatching and the day of the Sonic Rainboom. If not, then it honestly should be, dragging it out any longer would just get annoying at that point. We also need to know just what made the egg part of the unicorn exam.
Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, huh? Sorry to hear about that...hope your better now and can continue making these great chapters!
>when brilliant is simply not enough to express my satisfaction regarding this chapter and story. I feel bad for writing such a short review, but I don't know what to say other then I can't really express how much I enjoyed this.
An exceptional chapter. Your talent as a writer is without compare.
"Nothing," the black unicorn said with a sigh. She had been through just about every inch of this rock pile, and the only thing she had discovered were six worthless stone orbs. Unless the cult planned to ambush Celestia by dropping them on her head, she didn't see how they would be of any use.
*Ahem* Unless I'm mistaken, there should only be five orbs in the room. "When the five are present, a magical spark will cause the sixth to appear." I read the reference guide, I know how many orbs there were.
Also, I watched the first two episodes a couple hundred times, so...
*nods* Very true, but a few paragraphs later the sixth one meets with an unfortunate accident, resulting in there only being five left. Still perfectly canonical when Nightmare Moon shows up.
Personally, it never made much sense to me that "The sixth is a complete mystery," as they said in the show. There was never much reason given for the element of magic to be absent, other than for building suspense. Assuming Celestia had the full set of elements when she banished Luna, something must have happened to it between then and the first episodes. It busting into pieces was my take on what that 'something' might have been.
I don't argue that it wasn't there canonically, I argue that canon directly says that it wouldn't be there. The only way to disprove this would be to say that the reference guide was written after these events, but that would contradict the fact that the book says exactly where they are and what they look like, as, by this time, if the cult hadn't had access to the most general of information, able to be found in the library of a small town, then the only being that would know where they were would be Princess Celestia.
Now, you could argue that Princess Celestia wrote the book, planted it in the library shortly before Twilight arrived, preferably with the assistance of a councilor, so as not to draw attention, and placed Twilight in that library for the sole purpose of having her and the other five find it, seemingly by pure luck, but that would make it seem way too contrived, despite the fact that it makes this particular paragraph a possibility. It would also mean that Princess Celestia went back to the castle once more, and found that the sixth had shattered, but then, why would she write that it was a complete mystery, and what happened to the shards of the element of magic? If you watch that particular episode again, when the sixth element finally appears, it is fully intact as it floats down from the ceiling.
Wow. I never thought, when I was planning out my career, that I would spend enough time watching a show for little girls, then arguing about it over the internet. Life's funny sometimes...
In response to your first point, I skimmed the first two episodes again, but I don't recall the reference guide ever mentioning exactly what the elements looked like. Now, the book Twilight's reading in the opening scene of Episode 1 shows them simply as gems, which is what I'm imagining was their generally known state/appearance. Considering that (at least in my story) the reason they look like stone orbs is because of their powers being recently drained off, nobody would recognize what they truly were, hence why the cult passed them by.
As far as Celestia further manipulating the situation by writing/editing/revising the book and planting it for Twilight's further use, would it really be that hard to swallow? Based on Celestia's conversation with Twilight after Nightmare Moon is defeated, I got the sense that she was fully aware of the situation and was working behind the scenes. I'd guess that was why Twilight was sent to oversee the preparations, instead of simply being asked to attend. That would also apply to why the other five element bearers were in key positions for the celebration. Celestia was covering all the bases by ensuring they would each meet Twilight. In that regard, if Celestia had been subtly manipulating everything to such an end, wouldn't it also make sense for her to leave directions for Twilight on how to find and activate them?
With regards to your other points, such as Celestia returning to the castle, keeping the sixth element a secret, and its eventual return, I've already kicked around some tentative ideas for those in future chapters. Will do my best to address them in a canonically accurate and satisfying manner.
Also: Thanks much for bringing up these points. Despite the existing and upcoming divergences that result from the Skyrim crossover, I've tried keeping the story as accurate to the MLP universe as I can. It's good to have any screw-ups pointed out so I can either correct or retcon them.
PS:
"Wow. I never thought, when I was planning out my career, that I would spend enough time watching a show for little girls, then arguing about it over the internet. Life's funny sometimes... "
It's actually much worse than that. We're not actually arguing about the show itself, but rather the veracity of my fictional reinterpretation of fictional events in its already fictional world.
>>348522 You're correct as to the book not saying what they look like, but that pulls up another flaw: How did the Mane Six know what they were on sight? They simply appear at the castle gates, and, "We've found them!" By this logic, we can only assume that they knew what they were looking for, instead of searching for a golden plate inset with six multi-colored gems, but five spheres with certain symbols on them.
I haven't even begun to rant about how their elemental symbols match their cutie marks, and how that would have to be set up!
But before I go into that, another point to make. First, I concede that it would entirely be possible that Celestia was working behind the scenes the entire time, but I would think that she would do so in a way that was far less blatantly obvious. That aside, she must have known exactly who the element bearers would be ahead of time, convince them all to be in Ponyville at the time (luckily, they all lived there by choice anyway, save for twilight), put them in charge of certain events that Twilight would need to meet them somewhere along the line (which brings up another point: how did she plan to involve Pinkie?), and then finally hope that they all decided to follow Twilight into the library, and by extension, the Everfree, and finally, put them in situations that would force their elements to shine through so that Twilight could read them (and Nightmare Moon took care of that, so no worries there). Quite a lot of work, and most of those rest on a gamble. The chances of the plan succeeding is slim to none. Therefore, I do find it hard to swallow, and an incredibly contrived plan. One slip-up, and the entire thing goes haywire.
Now, I'm not saying that it's not possible, but it's highly improbable. It would likely cause the same amount of stress and fatigue as the egg did, if not more, albeit for different reasons. You could move down this route, but it would be treading on thin ice. What I'm saying is, be careful, and watch where you step. It's incredibly easy at this point to entrap yourself in a hole, and not be able to climb your way back out.
Lastly, before I go, I bring up these points for a reason, and I'm glad you see it better than the writers I actually edit for. It's a good idea to keep characters consistent, and to not stray too far away from the original ideas. You're doing well so far, but a few hiccups can easily turn into a cough. That being said, keep going, this is a great story.
When i first saw this i wasn't sure what to think, after reading the description the thought this was going be something along the line of spike trying to cope whit strange memory of death and nightmares,
and that didn't realty appeal to me, something whit spike as Alduin reincarnated didn't relay work for me.
But i decided to read and try it anyways sens descriptions isn´t always 100% correct, and buy am i glad i did
,
this story is REALLY good, its by far the best sklyrim crossover ill read to this moment
Im not sure where your gonna take the story from thin point, you left us at a relay large cliffhanger so how knows, he (Alduin) may slowly grow up over time and the story having a science of life twist to it, or in the blink of an eye reach adult size by magic mean, he many be good or he may revert back to his old seals and try to bring death and destruction to equestrian and the rest of the world.
I have no idea and regardless how you do choose to proceed i do hope you have Alduin be Alduin and not spike, both by appearance / looks, and personality.
If you make him a murderous monster, or kind and caring or something in between, i don't relay care just have him be him and not spike,
if you do that then in my opinion theirs no way this story can decline in awesomeness
Grate story so far thank you dear sir for taking time and effort to write this, and by all means keep the chapters coming
first
'and with a hearty"It's about freaking time!" rhaegas targaryen continued to read one of his favorite crossovers.'
seriously, this is what restores my faith in crossovers. i really needed this chapter after spending a week of reading bad fanfics.
keep up this gloriousness.
O..M...G.. Despite the vast honor you bestow on me with that amazing, unforgettable shout-out I shall try my best to control the urge to babbling incoherently while I praise your name, and the epic-tude of this chapter. ( I mail fail utterly )
The update came right on time to smack some sense into me, and get my rear in gear for updating my fic. I decided to promise myself that I wouldn't gaze upon the latest chapter of this amazing tale until I got my own updated. I gotta say that makes reeeaally good motivation, and now that I've finally gotten to read this chapter.....totally...worth it.
Your mastery of that Skyrim mythology is freaking amazing, I don't know if you work for Bethesda, have just read every book in the game, or are just pulling some of this out no where but either way keep on doing it Crosis! You could probably make a killing just writing Skyrim lore all by itself, the mlp is just a bonus.
Alduins rebirth was really good, I always kinda wondered about what was going through the dragon's minds as they were resurrected right in front of me, and your spin on it makes complete sense. Akatosh using Twilight as a avatar so he could try to subdue his reborn son was brilliant ( I had no idea where you were going with that "I am sorry" part in that last chapter and definitely didn't see that coming.)
And then you multiplied this chapters awesome by 10 when you brought the renowned Prince of Madness into the fray. What better way to stop a dragon god than by bonking him on the head with Wabbajack.
I'll leave off with that so I don't blow up this comment page with my silly gushing.
But seriously this chapter gets a favorite, and this story gets a well deserved watch, as well as it's author. Keep up the amazing work Crosis, and looking forward to "Broken Record"s next chapter.
i thought you gave up on this story there for a while and im glad i was wrong, this chapter did take its sweet time and hopefully next one come out faster, but i can tell you whit certainty that it was worth the wait, good writing, good character description, humor/comedy everything perfect as always
OK, I had Dragonforce's "Through the Fire and Flames" playing during what I know to be the Sonic Rainboom sequence and through Alduin's hatching. It made it not 20% more awesome, but about 60% more awesome. I think I have an ironic choice in music, considering what was happening. The entire thing was great as well.
Hooray, Sheogorath! He's the best Daedra. Although, I personally think Spike should inadvertantly summon him in the future and he and Pinkie Pie should meet. Wait, no, that would only cause the end of the world. That, or an insanely huge party. I take it back, they must never be allowed to meet.
Isn't this missing the Crossover tag?
This has been a wonderful, wonderful read and I don't care how long I have to wait for another chapter, because it will be worth it. I just love how well you're writing Sheogorath. I was laughing practically whenever he talked.
The idea of the story as a whole also intrigues me and I really want to see how it all goes down.
Double thumbs up for you, if I could.
Another brilliant chapter. Also I can completely understand Alduin's fear. Losing your very identity is something that I would be afraid of too. But at least he has a mommy! OMIGOSH, we could ship Celestia and Akatosh and then we'll have a happy family! 
Great work, best wishes and did I forget to mention I love you? Also I hope for more mommy Celestia moments (seriously I love those parts).
I started reading this simply to pass time and get to know more about the the whole skyrim/elder scroll thing (admittedly Im not a big fan). But boy did I get what I want and then some!
The effort you gave is evident in your work good sir and I say its astounding!
It has been a blast so far and I hope to read more from you soon.
Opening the doors to the throne room, she strode inside with a confident smile. “Good morning,” she announced. “I understand that an audience has been requested… with… me…”
Celestia’s jaw dropped as scores of eyes focused upon her. The throne room was filled from wall to wall, ponies of all ages and types packed together and fidgeting with excitement while her aides formed a crude line to try and hold them back. The main doors were fully opened, the crowd stretching out into the streets.
__________________________
LMAO.
Its an egg. - Crazy Train by Ozzy.
>>348621 Wow, you posted your comment 21 weeks ago, so if my reply to it confuses you for a moment, I apologize.
In regards to your third paragraph's sentence of
First, I concede that it would entirely be possible that Celestia was working behind the scenes the entire time, but I would think that she would do so in a way that was far less blatantly obvious.I ask, "blatantly obvious to who?" Remember the original intended audience of the show and not the majority of us on this site writing and reading. To us, the thought of Princess Celestia deliberately planting the book and manipulating Twilight's path so that she would find everything she needed to defeat Nightmare Moon in such a manner is blatantly obvious, with a little bit of fridge logic and Celestia's own admission. However, is it blatantly obvious to an eight-ten-year old? The majority of bronies, being people aged above eighteen-twenty years, are much more used to complex plots with subtle hints and nudges than a child whose brain is still largely underdeveloped. To some kids, Celestia's comment of "I told you to make some friends," at the end of the second episode may have been a mind-blowing line.
Far as the story goes, I am quite enjoying it. Akatosh seems really peeved at Twilight for awakening Alduin a second time. I thought that he was supposed to be ready for servitude at this point? That's why he was returned to being an egg, right? So that he could live again, but humbly and as he was intended to live while being stripped of his knowledge and memory of being Alduin, The World-Eater?
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
Oh...Sweet...Celestia...
Sheogorath. Akatosh actually called Sheogorath to come help.
Beyond that, have all of my laughs!
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
>>1124004 Really? I would have thought that it was from Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. That was the whole one dealing with the Oblivion Crisis and Akatosh and everything, even though I've only played about six hours of Oblivion compared to over a hundred of Skyrim.
Sheogorath is just...Sheogorath. Oh shit. Celestia, God, the Divines, Mother Mystra, Lathander, and Sehanine preserve us...what would happen if Sheogorath and Sanguine were to meet with Pinkie Pie?
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
With so much technical jargon in this series, I would have expected you to know of the Hardy-Weinberg Principle.
Long story short, a family and genetic prevalence in a population does not change over time unless there is selective breeding or bottleneck effects.
I mean a single family cannot pass down the Nightmare Moon Factor to encompass at least a third of the Equestrian population. Impossible, no matter whether there was a thousand years or ten thousand years.
Unless, the pattern of transmitting this NMM Factor was unlike genetics and simply wrote over all halfbreeds offspring from cross-breeding between a Night guard pony and a non-night guard pony, then I don't know, the number of ponies with this factor masking over them would definitely have been growing exponentially...
Reset Password
Resend Verification Email
6
0
79
Joined December 2011
5,230 ( 26,793 )
More
Less
Post Comment
Refresh
BAWWS
Image: http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxduw26M5W1qzrlhgo1_500.jpg
Image: http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m15xwzup9Z1rpgkrro1_500.gif
Image: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m08i8pWMEz1qiehy9.gif
Image: http://images.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw2608-facehoof.png
Cancel
Send