Zecora
“Normally I do not mind some guests, but not when they walk while they rests.”
Twilight glanced up from the mug of warm broth Zecora had planted in front of her nose. The lavender unicorn had awoken to find herself butting her head against Zecora’s door, having apparently sleepwalked all the way through the Everfree forest. The zebra had explained that Twilight had been mumbling something about theaters and adjectives when she wasn’t singing, “Before you came into my life I missed you so bad”.
“I am so sorry, Zecora. It’s… been a long day.”
“Perhaps my pony friend should check her sight, as it is clear to me that it is night.”
Twilight took another swig of the amber-colored broth. It flowed down her throat and warmed her belly, which in turn chased away the cold that lingered on her limbs. “Ok, it’s been a long few days. Did you know every pony in Equestria is crazy?”
“It is not wise to insult those you hold dear,” Zecora said. “But… why do you think I live out here?”
Twilight laughed. “I hadn’t thought of that… how much does it cost to rent one of these spooky cabins? I have some bits saved up.”
“Though you laugh I know you are sad. What have your friends done that is so bad? That you are upset is easy to see, why else would you want to move to the Everfree?”
Twilight let out a sigh, rubbing her eyes with her hooves. “So you know who Scootaloo is, right?”
“She is a friend of the dear filly Applebloom. Why do you treat her like a bringer of doom?”
“It isn’t her fault... but no one really knows much about her. I mean, I’ve never met her parents or guardians, or heard where she lives. She just kinda… showed up out of thin air one day and became Applebloom and Sweetie Belle’s friend. And that was ok, but when you get to thinking about it… it’s really weird that other than hanging around them you don’t hear much about her.” Twilight sighed, blowing a lock of hair out of her eyes. “I don’t know, I just want to know what her deal is.”
“And while you have attempted that, you see why curiosity killed the cat.”
“Oh, how I wish it was just killing me. I would give my hoof for this quest to kill me,” Twilight complained, laying her head on the table. “But knowing my luck, the Grim Reaper would trot up and have his own story about Scootaloo!”
~Meanwhile, in the void…~
The Grim Reaper looked over at the collected souls he had gathered. “So, what do you think? And give me your honest opinion… no matter how blunt. I can take it.”
Starswirl the Bearded frowned. “I don’t know… seems kinda farfetched that Scootaloo use to be part of a gang of fillies and colts that traveled around Equestria solving mysteries with their talking dog.”
“I agree,” said Blenheim Orange, a ginger mare whose dark brown mane was one long braid. “I just can’t see Old Stallion Philips being stopped by some meddling fillies and colts and their puppy.”
“…I hate you! I hate all of you!” Reaper screamed, before running out of the meeting like a 3 year old girl.
Blenheim turned to her husband, a gigantic dark red earth pony named Brown Snout, and shrugged. “At least our daughter’s story made sense!”
“AJ was always a clever one,” Brown stated.
~MC~MC~MC~
“With this story the author should stay, instead of making jokes with a cutaway.”
“You say something Zecora?” Twilight called out from across the room, ladling out another helping of broth.
Zecora merely smiled as Twilight trotted back over. “Now I see why you are blue, trying to learn about Scootaloo.”
“It isn’t even the learning part that gets me!” Twilight complained. “It is the silly stories everypony is tells me. Scootaloo is spy, Scootaloo is a goddess, Scootaloo is a chicken.” She shook her head in annoyance. “I feel like I am the last sane pony in Equestria.”
“The answer you seek is easy to see: don’t ask ponies, instead ask me.”
“You?” Twilight asked. “You know about Scootaloo?”
“Of this fact I cannot deny. Would you give my story a try?”
“One moment!” Twilight rushed over to Zecora’s bed and grabbed the big, fluffy pillow that Fluttershy had gotten the zebra for her birthday. The unicorn dragged it over to the table and, after setting it down, slammed her head against it a few times, smiling as she realized there was no pain. “Alright, I’m all set!”
“…while now I have my concerns about you, I push them aside to speak of Scootaloo.”
~MC~MC~MC~
Every pegasus in Clouddale loved to fly a lot
But the filly who lived below did not
This grounded mare, named Scootaloo
Didn’t hate flying, she loved it too!
But flap as she might, all she did was fall
For her wings were two sizes too small.
So Scootaloo watched and glowered and groaned
And cursed the tiny little wings that she owned
“If only they were bigger!” she would complain
But wish as she might, they were in vain
For ask any pony, no matter what you try
If your wings are tiny, you’ll never fly
And as each day past she grew only bitter
Watching the fliers while sat on her sitter
Try as they might, no friend could give help
For when they spoke, all she would do is yelp:
“It’s not fair that I am stuck with these tiny things!
While each of you have your majestic wings!
I should be up there, it’s easy to see!
Things simply aren’t as they should be!”
So she sat on the ground, still as a stump
Glowering and hissing like a small traglump
Stuck to the earth like she was coated in glue
The filly got angry and stared to stew
“What the heck is a traglump?”
“Interrupting is not a nice, please don’t make me say it twice”
And as she glared at the clouds, she got an idea
A terrible, awful, horrid idea
“See how they dance and soar and garbling
While I am stuck with hardly a wing
I think I'll sneak up, quick as a cough
And rip all of their feathery wings off!”
“HOLY CELESTIA!”
~MC~MC~MC~
“I asked you for quiet once, Twilight, yet you interrupt again, which is not right.”
“Sorry, sorry,” Twilight said with a sigh. “Just… that story kinda took a dark turn. I mean, Scootaloo ripping wings off of pegasi? That’s about as twisted as that rumor I heard about how Pinkie Pie makes her cupcakes.” Twilight leaned in close. “They say she uses…artificial sweeteners!”
“With how much you ponies love sugary this and that, I am surprised you all aren’t more fat.”
“We do Pilates,” Twilight said dismissively. “Now, I don’t like it that you have Scootaloo becoming some crazed murderer. I already dealt with enough crazy stuff over the last three weeks. So I am giving you one more chance: keep the story sane and rational…” Twilight yanked the pillow away, “…or the table gets it.”
~MC~MC~MC~
And so it was, 15 minutes before noon
That the filly prepared her pink balloon
With a snip and snap she went into the sky
Plotting her revenge on those that could fly
The land drifted away as she began to float
In her silver balloon and wicker tree boat
She looked to the clouds and felt only hate
Taking revenge of the pegesi would be so great
But as she neared the city to enact her plan
The balloon struck a spiky Biggletigtan
She could not scream or let out a call
Her balloon had been popped and she began to fall!
“Ok, now you are clearly making up words. Why didn’t I bring Mr. Dictionary with me…”
Scootaloo screamed as she plummeted far
She fell from the heavens like a shooting star
She pinched herself, hoping to wake
But she knew that she’d become a pancake
Just when she thought she would go splat
Upon her head she felt a small pat
And what had caught her? It was plain to see!
It was a helpful pegasus or three!
“Great, making up words and now Scootaloo can’t count.”
And as she hung in their hooves, giving a pitch and sway
Why, little Scootaloo’s heart grew three sizes that day!
All the hate and anger and fled from her heart
And she decided to give life a new fresh start
“If her heart grew three sizes it would burst out of her chest. Maybe it’s a medical condition… maybe that is why she can’t count!”
From that day forth Scootaloo was a new filly
And she knew that getting mad was just silly
Having small wings or a mane that is purple
Is no reason to…uh…uh…purple purple.
“Did you just rhyme purple with purple?”
“Well, it isn’t easy to rhyme, Twilight, so cut me some slack!”
~MC~MC~MC~
Twilight stared at Zecora, her jaw hanging so low Pinkie Pie could have used it as a swing. “You… you spoke normal.”
“…no I didn’t!” Zecora said hastily.
“You did it again!”
“You are hearing things.”
Twilight shook her head in disbelief. “All this time you could talk without rhyming! I don’t believe this! I mean, I knew Zebras could talk normally-“
“I’m getting kinda insulted that you keep saying ‘normal’.” Zecora huffed. When Twilight just stared at her, the zebra quickly added, “and that is…uh…wow, it is hard to find a word that rhymes with normal.”
“This is amazing! I mean, I never realized the rhyming thing was a choice.”
“Of course it was a choice! Why did you think I did it?”
Twilight shrugged. “I thought maybe you hit your head as a baby and suffered brain damage.”
Zecora stared at Twilight in horror. “That… that is just disturbing! Why would you think that?”
“I always assume brain damage is the reason for ponies acting different.”
“…you have problems, Twilight.” Zecora said. “If you must know, I rhyme because it is expected of me. I am the daughter of the Lady of Zebrica, who is the goddess and ruler of Zebrica. In my land, the royalty sing their commands and thus I, as the ambassador of Zebrica to these lands, must rhyme as well.”
“Wait… your mother is a goddess? Does that mean you are related too-“
“Hi Zecora!” Luna called out as she walked in through the front door, followed by Cadence and Tydal. “You ready to party? Auntie Luna brought margaritas!“ The moon goddess blinked when she realized Zecora wasn’t alone, a huge grin formed upon her lips when she realized who was standing before her. “Twilight! Give mama a hug!”
Twilight stared at the gods before shrugging. “You know what? I don’t care. If it gets me drunk I’ll be your daughter. I’ll be your kid for booze.”
“That’s all I ever asked!” Luna said happily, hugging Twilight.
“That is so sweet!” Cadence cooed softly. Then she smiled, horn glowing. “I’m gonna make’em kiss.”
“Cadence, no! Bad alicorn!” Tydal shouted, smacking the love goddess with a rolled up newspaper.
“Our family is strange,” Zecora stated.
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And thus begins the final stretch!
There are only 4 chapters left, after this one, of The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo. Next we have Soarin' chapter (which will again twist slightly how I tell these stories), then Rainbow Dash FINALLY gets her tale, followed by Princess Celestia and, at long last, Scootaloo will return and lay out once and for all her true origin.
Now, for this chapter... dear god is rhyming hard. This chapter felt like writing something that was twice as long! Still I really like how this one turned out.
Yes, I just gave Applejack's parents names. My theory is that her mother was from the Orange family and married AJ's father, an Apple. The names I chose are both names of apples (yes, some apples are called 'oranges'...who knew?). Brown Snout is an apple used to make cider, which i figured fit quite well.
As a final note, I haven't settled on what will be my next story after this one ends... there is God Squad and Emerald Twilight... but I am actually leaning now towards a new idea I began scripting out yesterday... let me know what you think of this:
They say that Manehattan is the city that never sleeps. If that is so, then Ponyville is the town that never wakes up. It is a place of dreamers... none of whom realize the pleasant fantasies they hold can turn into nightmares.
I've been hired to investigate the death of Valencia Orange. She was found belly up, floating in a pond over at Sweet Apple Acres. Police ruled it a suicide but her husband thinks different. He's seen how the Apple Family settles grudges and he wants proof that his little Orange was bucked before she was ripe.
Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.
Name is Thunderlane, Private Eye
Oh my gosh, I love this chapter!
Zecora unable to find some rhymes,
Dr. Seuss style story,
Names for Applejack's parents,
Cupcakes reference,
AND the Grim Reaper thinks Scootaloo's origin involves a scooby-doo style story.
Congratulations!
Crazed murdered?
I believe you mean crazed murderer.
(Also The Grinch who stole Christmas reference)
And why do I have a feeling the Soarin chapter will be about how Scootaloo is his and Spitfire's daughter.
I'm calling it. Scootaloo's story will be completely, utterly normal. I will be disappointed if it is otherwise.
The Grim Reaper should have totally spoken in ALL CAPS
Never heard of this song
Emerald Twilight, clever.
I swear, just the reveal of what kind of story will be told is enough to make me burst into laughter.
So will we find out if Twilight is really the daughter of Nightmare Moon and Discord by the end of the fic, or are their deities just nuts (or both)?
I liked the grinch like story, gave me a few chuckles.
But Cadence always cracks me up XD
This has to be one of the best chapters yet! xD
Stage four: Acceptance.
Lol Mort. I can see how you got confused, but Scootaloo is not Scrappy Doo. This is not to say that I wouldn't love to see Scoots jumping around in a boxers pose yelling "Lemme at 'em, lemme at 'em!"
Best line ever........
....................................
.... Never mind, this is the best part.
dotallyrad.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/1912-so-much-win_inline.jpg
1379769
BE VERY VERY GLAD. No really. After avoiding it for months, my best friend sang it to me.
Anyway~. Like I said at the very beginning of this story...I really need to stop reading this in the student lounge if I'm gonna keep trying to not laugh out loud.
1379911 the songs called BE VERY VERY GLAD?
scooby doo!!!!! I'm gonna guess that Scootaloo is Velma coz of the orange sweater she wears or shaggy
I love this series so bloody much.
...I want to see a certain Young Frankenstein running gag
*cough Frau Blucher caugh*make an appearance1379923
The song is called Call Me, Maybe. What Twilight was singing was the end of the song I sang with Discord and Deadpool.
1379679
Ohmygosh ohmygosh! I always wanted to read a noire style detective fic (see my avatar) and finally YES you are doing it! Youre doing it right? Dude, you have no idea how long ive been waiting for someone to do this!
Dreams do come true!
KEEP IT UP!!!
1379769 i think the song is call me maybe it oddly populr lately
1379978 hey boy I just met you
And this is crazy
But here's my number
So call me maybe
1379968 yea
Could you do the Rainbow one before the Scootaloo the one instead of whatever order you did?
Or is it already in that order?
1171501 you could do the Celestia one next since she's in Zecoras Hut with with Twilight already
Then you could do Soarin then RD
I kinda want to want to read what Twilight does to brownies. You keep teasing us.
1379986
The order is: Soarin', Rainbow Dash, Princess Celestia, Scootaloo. The reason for that order will be clear soon enough.
Celestia isn't in the hut. it was Luna, Tydal and Cadence.
Oh
1380001
“You know what? I don’t care. If it gets me drunk I’ll be your daughter. I’ll be your kid for booze.”
“That’s all I ever asked!”
So freaking hilarious.
Poor Twilight, she needs a vacation. 
Purple, of all words purple is the worst to rime. Just saying it.
Dr. Suesscora? Yes please!
This one was pretty amusing, especially when Zecora stopped rhyming. That's always good for a laugh.
1379763
No, in Small Caps. ([ smcaps])
Also, was the Scooby Death thing planned from before the comments asking for it last chapter?
Also also,
when Luna and the others walk in.
Also also also: MOAR PLZ. And a new story really quickly once it finishes.
Doctor Seuss plus almost Cupcakes, BRILLIANT!!!
1380074
Nope. I read every comment and when there is a demand for something I usually end up finding a way to fit it in.
Only 4 chapters left?
This story and the stories in it are just so addicting though...
Calling it now, Scootaloo is going to troll Twilight too
1380176
Don't worry. Once the many story is done, there will be the occasional deleted scene (basically, any new chapter ideas I have will be added as a 'deleted scene') and 'What Might Have Been' where I revealed the ending of each chapter that would have made them the TRUE origin of Scootaloo.
1380338
It's Discord...I think its impossible to write him out of character.
Four more untill we find out Scoot has parents in Cloudsdale whom support her normally and just are away so she is living with her Uncle Snowflake. "YEAH!"
I gotta say that this is your best chapter in a while. The Dr. Seuss stuff shows you have talent, dude. I look forward to the other chapters!
1380410
This story is an anthology. There was ALWAYS going to be different types of chapters making fun of different types of story styles. I made that very clear early on. Plus, stop acting so offended, it makes you look silly.
EDIT: Why are you drudging up things from a week ago, anyway? What's the point? The story is still wildly popular and getting great reviews... you didn't like some chapters that is fine. But stop bringing it up, especially after you already said you were done.
so far we've had a cupcakes reference and a rainbow factory reference all we need is a sweet apple massacre and a cheerilee's garden reference to make it complete.
Freaking love how you addedDeath to the stroy, laughed my ass off when I read that, and Scooby-Doo! Buck yes! This chapter was funny...I enjoyed it.
>>>“With this story the author should stay, instead of making jokes with a cutaway.”
“You say something Zecora?” Twilight called out from across the room, ladling out another helping of broth.>>>
Zecora broke the 4th wall... and is related to the alicorns... the Apocalypse is now upon us.
That line is so much win.
Scooby Doo? Grim Reaper with the same troubles? Murderous Scootaloo? Zecora is the descendant of a goddess? Twilight just became an oni of alcohol?!
Hope you come visit in the holidays!
...
..WHY DO I READ THIS?!
I'LL TELL YOU WHY! BECAUSE IT IS SO AMUSING AND ENTERTAINING AND WHAT NOT!
Even if you succeed in defying all laws of rational thought and common sense. And break my mind. Time after time. Farewell sanity!
oh my god. I can't stop laughing.
1380636 what is this "sanity" of which you speak?
Can you eat it?
A scootaloo as scoobydoo type story would be awesome!