• Published 6th Sep 2018
  • 20,306 Views, 87 Comments

A Dire Situation - Damien Darkside



You have to have sex with Celestia in order to save your soul. This is obviously Twilight's fault.

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Comments ( 49 )

This was good.
Also, DOOM references. Gotta love 'em.

i an not a furry i would only fuck her if i she would be a human.

Breaking: local man too angry to die.

It was interesting, and I can honestly say I’ve not read the plot line before. My only issue is your submitting it to Good HiE before it had a single view, much less the required 100 upvotes.

Solid story like my di-. I do hope you write more Celestia stuff. Heck, I hope you write more stuff in general.

9155914
That was by accident, I added it to a ton of groups and when I realized I submitted it, I had no idea how to revoke it.

Give it like, two more hours. It will get there.

9155890
When I made a demon I knew I had to do it.

9155918
Celly has more stories on my profile than any other character. Two. :P She's great though.

I'll read this later good sir.

RIP AND TEAR!!!!!!!

(Does wicked air guitar solo and frightens co-workers)

To anyone who doubts the wisdom behind the Featured Box or the lowest common denominator, remember that this is what gets there.

We definitely need a sequel of Luna getting in on the action.

SHEOGORATH! YES!!!! CHEESE! FOR EVERYPONY!!

Boyd isn't a demon, he's just mortally challenged.

Any demon who leaves by saying "peace out bitches" is pretty chill.

Loved the opening, and the ending.

Thank you for posting.

Rip and Tear... That is all

Instead of sheogorath, it should’ve been “sam generis” instead...that would’ve been perfect (daedric prince of debauchery: Sanguine)

Those references though :rainbowlaugh: I love it!

Celly and butt stuff, my two favourite things!
The humour was great as well. Enjoyed this thoroughly :)

Love it all!:moustache:

Well this was funny as buck, thank you for the fucking great fic.

Featured on Aug 6 2018!

Are you sure?

9156407
Yeah, you shouldn't doubt either of them. Clearly people have great taste and it made it clear when my fantastic fic filled with great sex, comedy and romance skyrocketed past everything else. I'm glad you noticed and stopped by to compliment me.

9156759
Wait, scratch that. Cheese for no pony. That can be just as much of a celebration if you don't like cheese. True?

9156895
I'm glad that at least a few people here respect the feelings of the mortally challenged.

9157093
What else is going to happen to him? He gets sent to Hell? Jokes on you he's already there and has a few keys to get out. He likes to get pizzas on Thursdays.

9157489
I like Sheogorath more, probably because I played way too much of Shivering Isles.

9157697
During writing those became my two favorite things as well.

9157582
Glad you like to too Dustchu <3

9158235
Look, I paid Boyd off to make sure nobody noticed but you did. Now I gotta get a refund and knowing him he's already bought cocaine with it. (Still, thanks though)

9158277
Wait. You mean Hamsters comment was just a poorly written compliment? Well, this changes everything. I must give him an up vote immediately!

9158277
Clearly. After all, Dan Brown and Stephanie Meyer were also popular by pandering to readers who can only live through fictional characters. Gotta find that niche after all.

9158302
Well, my passive-aggressive not-friend, let me help you out. You see those double arrows on the comments? You need to hit that before you type out a comment.

9158283

What if I already am in my room?

Then make a different room your room and go there!

"How was Tamriel?"
"Oh fine, fine. Sheogorath has the best selection of cheese and those little crackers he insists come from a place called Indar. Said they're salted with the tears of Vanu players."

Lol *insert BFG division theme here*

The second chapter was icing on the cake. A great story turned sexcellent.

Love the DOOM references. Funnily enough, I had a video of Markiplier playing DOOM running on my TV before I started reading this. Just thought that was an interesting coincidence. :derpytongue2:

a dire situation

The fucking DOOM references and callout.

Remember: if someone 'said' something, there needs to be a comma before the said tag and after what was said. Not a period.

“Yeah uh… that’s the long and short of it.” You admit as everyone started murmuring.

This should be way more interesting than Day Court.” The Solar Monarch said...

Each of these need a comma before the 'The' and after the dialogue, for example. Also, any word after the comma (with the exception of proper nouns and 'I', or other such always capitalized words) needs to be lowercase . Like so:

“Yeah uh… that’s the long and short of it,” you admit as everyone started murmuring.

Good luck!

“We can tell them that it is the alternate way of swearing. Tell them that it’s the clean way to say ‘buck’ or something. They will buy it if you tell them.”

I see what you did there :trollestia:

All in all, not bad for a deal with a devil.

Incubi are demons, dammit!! :flutterrage:

Boyd should just go to equestria, he could make a killing in the sex business :pinkiecrazy:

Great secret ending! Doom!!! :twilightsmile:

Though I anticipated every twist, and have had a pretty nasty day, I could not stop laughing through this!:rainbowlaugh::heart::rainbowkiss:...and I surprisingly was turned on by the sex a bit:rainbowwild: (Lots of Rainbows...:pinkiecrazy:)

Ay another one from you. Glad to see you're still keeping up with it when you aren't dying in video games. Well done as normal, caught a few things here and there. But some if it might be because of that weird Canada-speak you do. Still though, glad to see some work from you again and defintiely can't wait till the next mare you decide to sex up. Keep up the good work man.

now this is a gurd story. a little bit short for my liking but still really good.

Thank you very much for this Fic, I really enjoy it. The characterization of our immortal mistress, the God-Empress Celestia is credible and even more so when she condemns all relationships with any kind of demon and, like the lord of humanity during the Great Crusade with the Imperial Truth, censures all types of knowledge about the chaos and that's why even Twilight has no idea what she does when she invokes an incubus, and like Magnus the Red, she is arrogant and thinks that everything will come out the way she wants.
It also disturbs me that despite Celestia's explicit prohibition, Luna is actively involved with demons and she has conspired to have Twilight desecrated by a demon slag of Slaanesh. This only proves that Luna is a slave of the ruinous powers and she and every follower she has must be purged like the unclean heretics they are ... PURGE ALL THE LUNAR HERETICS !!!
Postscript: Damien Darkside is among the greats of the HIE. derpicdn.net/img/2012/12/18/186943/thumb.jpg
i.pinimg.com/564x/7b/5a/21/7b5a213788f118c942482b1265309977.jpg
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/7/3/363232__safe_artist-colon-tomgrakk_princess+celestia_astartes+pattern+baldness_blood+ravens_bloody+magpies_carrying_chain+sword_derp_frown_indrick+bore.jpeg

9305502
No, it certainly isn’t.

9180043
In the name of balance I hereby decree that both the celestial and lunar empires shall embrace one another in camaraderie. If you cannot do so stay on your side of the day/night line and allow for converts. Purging is not nice. Peace, love, and tolerance. May harmony be with you.:yay:

First of all, this was great. Second - check out Young Scrolls on SoundCloud.

Slightly cringe but pretty good.

This last bit was just perfect. Also, yeah, I hear Sheogorath might be up for buddying up.

I really hope there's a sequel with Luna and her pussy.

*Sound of RIPPING AND TEARING intensifies.*

Comment posted by Bronzer deleted Mar 9th, 2020

10116856
Thank you! Both of you! You have no idea how much the sword in the stone thing bothers me! So many people think they are one and the same...

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