Will Ye No Come Back Again?

by Judge Holden

Sam Battles The Pink Menace

"Courage is the resistance to fear, the mastery of fear- not the absence of fear."

-Mark Twain

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She was literally standing over me until my eyes shut. I had to pretend that I was asleep for her to leave, and even then, I didn't trust her. For all I knew, she was going to pretend to leave, then wait for me to open my eyes and then end my life.

It took me three hours of pretending I was asleep, which was surprisingly difficult. If you pretend something long enough, you end up actually doing it. The last thing I wanted was to actually fall asleep now.

Once I was reasonably certain that I was safe, I opened my eyes with a yawn, and tried to quietly creep out of the bed. I cringed when my feet hit the ground with a clop. I tensed up and froze, my ears twitching around and listening intently for any signs of my kidnapper. She hadn't even left the door when I was made to have a bath.

To my relief and anxiety, I heard nothing. It was time for me to check the window. I may be able to escape through it.

I looked at my hooves again. How was I going to open that window, though? I didn't want to break it- the pink menace had introduced me to the horses who owned the bakery I was now sleeping above, and they seemed super nice. They even gave me a muffin and a glass of milk before bed, and I didn't want to repay the favor by breaking something.

In addition, if I broke the window, I would be making a really loud noise, and then she would come in and...

I shook my head. Admittedly, they were all really nice. Even the pink one. She was just... really animated. And lively. And energetic. And terrifying.

The reason I wanted out of here so bad was because I told her I was supposed to go to my family. See the problem?

Speaking of problems, I was facing a fairly large one right now: it wasn't the kind of window that would open. All the purpose it served was letting light into the room.

It also didn't help that there were strong iron bars on the outside of the window- I missed them on the way in on account of trying to free myself from the pink menace.

Okay, so window is out. My head turned to the door, and my heart stopped.

There she stood with the door shut behind her. Something was different, though. She looked puzzled, not crazy.

"Why are you up?" she whispered. "It's after midnight!"

I gulped, and looked back at the window.

"Ooh, is the moon too bright? We can switch rooms if you like."

"I don't belong here," I said. She tilted her head, and took a few steps forward. I fell to my rump.

"What's the matter?" she asked gently. It was the first time I didn't tense up when she approached. She sat next to me.

"I'm not supposed to be here," I whispered. I felt tears stinging my eyes but I didn't want to let them out.

I hardly even reacted when she put a hoof on my back.

"Please," I whispered. "Let me leave. I shouldn't be here."

"Huh? You can't leave, silly filly! Listen to the rain! Plus, you have a nice cozy bed tonight. Why would you want to leave?"

She seemed to sense that my emotional state was getting worse, because she made me look at her and then proceeded to stick her tongue out and make a weird face.

I stared.

"What are you?" I asked quietly. She grinned at me, and moved her hooves to my face to make me smile.

"Pinkie Pie! Same as I've been all day today!"

I said no more. Her manipulating of my face forced my tears free, and she pulled back, fearing she caused them.

"I didn't know dying could be so hard," I said shakily.

She didn't understand me at first. "Being an orphan doesn't sound like any fun to me."

I really was an orphan in a way, wasn't I? I certainly had no family here. Just the thought drained any energy from my body. I didn't even resist when she pulled me into her chest.

"Your family and friends will look out for you. I promise it will get better. Now, go on. Say whatever you need. Ol' Pinkie is listening!"

I had little left to say. Instead of a word, I focused on the sound of her heartbeat. This wasn't my behavior back home. I never needed comfort like this.

I didn't, right? I can't remember.

I did, however, feel my eyelids growing heavy. Pinkie gently rubbed my back while I just focused on existing and simultaneously not being in this situation.

That's how I fell asleep that night- in Pinkie's embrace.

End of Chapter

Author's Note:

So we're going to be seeing the Pink Menace a lot, because why not. Also I think it's really funny that the guy who is now afraid of his own shadow is hanging out with her.

Comments

[tezzbot]

Eh hehejejeje.

The pink menace is rarely seen in the fiction world, although it is one of my favorite ways new humans view pinkie. Who wouldnt be scared shitless if a pretty pink pony could break the laws of physics and personal space?

[unknowncape7377]

7933011 and don't forget the fourth wall