ppg1998
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I am mildly concerned.
more plz
Exploding punches, huh? That is both cliché and AWESOME at the same time.
7235581 you got a better idea for creeper powers? That doesn't involve suicide bombing?
7235671 dan's raging demon?
7235767 I don't even know what that is?
7235773 or evil ryu raging demon, im to much of street fighter fan
7235788 ... I'm not giving CC that power. Just. No.
7235842 yes but that completely defeats any real danger to her and becomes way too over powered.
7235865 she isn't obsessed. Would you be be like Oh Hell Yea if you found out could make explosions with your fists?
7235898 I'm not going to give her that power deal with it. this is my story.
7235907
k
7235671
While I have no issues with exploding punches, I think that an ability like Bombette's from Paper Mario may fit better, since her thing is to explode repeatedly.
I totally love CC.
get one life*
get one chance*
that's a tense error.
sexy shouldn't be capitalised.
Or give her Gambit's power from the x-men. Though she does seem fine as she is. Perhaps let her abilities grow over time.
7236198 appreciate the suggestion but I recommend you wait and see why this power can do before you judge. This is only the beginning after all
I approve of this. Lets go.
Just needs a little grammar check but otherwise great so far
Grammar and techniques need a bit of a polish, but this could still work out well. I've seen a few good minecraft stories on here, but also many that faded after only a few chapters. Let's hope this is a rare success.
7236551 its one punch allover again........ but...... I LOVE IT MAKE ME MORE OR I WILL....um.........ONE PUNCH YOU!!!!! HAHAHHAAAHAHAAHAH..........I'm tired............ I need to go to bed nowstatic1.techinsider.io/image/5644f3b22491f990008b4ac9-1920-1080/onepunchman_forreal.jpg ............. your face is gone by the way.....bye.......
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/26/8f/6a/268f6aecc88184f8d2927f42371830d2.jpg
7235773
media.giphy.com/media/3rgXBOPGNwvpKuzaBq/giphy.gif
Wow the like button
cdn.meme.am/instances/250x250/60834866.jpg
...So Demo what do ya think?
TF2 Demoman: "That was bloody brilliant!!!! *burp*...Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Couldn't put any better myself
7243340 hey I had to remake this entire chapter from scrap give me some credit while doing all of this on my phone.
I like like it
*<>* lol...CC got herself a pair of hoof canons
Well time to show those flower girls horror! Give them a creeper hello and a goodbye for there garden and stand
it?
i think "you" goes there.
and i know how hard it is to write on a phone
God, how annoying it can get.....
but great chapter still, amazing even considering you wrote this on a phone.
keep up the great work buddy!
I like this more than the previous version of this chapter.
7245046 yea I admit I screwed up on that one. So I had to make a new one and actually come up with one with actual reasonable reactions with the characters. Zecora being helpful and defending a friend even if it's with other friends. And her purposesly not rhythm to show how pissed she is. The flower girls jumping to conclusions which led to a misunderstanding with rainbow dash and her jumping to action first chance she gets. Applejack stopping the fight before it escalates and having a gut feeling that she isn't a changeling and calling out rainbow's brashness. I'm trying to get it acurate as possible of how they would normally act in these situations.
Hmm I'm actually hoping this is going end up CC x Zecora.
Soooooooo cute.
I have enjoyed this story so far please continue to raise the bar.
I shall not end this review on a sour note, so I shall end it with a quote.
"Over the course of your life, you will be burdened by grief and despair. But by overcoming them, you will sharpen the fangs of your heart."
......... Marry me?
7252006
[CC] I don't know what that means but even I know that won't happen
I'm gonna watch this carefully, a lot of minecraft stories arn't very good and this one is.
And, I want to watch this succeed since I like minecraft, and the last unique thing I saw here ended prematurely because of criticism even though it was going well.
So! *Slowly slinks away and in a nasally voice says:* I'm watching you!
I love it
this is pretty nice
did no one notice the lack of grammar at the end?
a few small grammar errors, you consistently forget to capitalize names it seems. You should work on that for the next chapter. other then that interesting enough ^_^
I am thinking that the last word was supposed to be "sane" if so then I say typos are annoying
Bomb hoof to the face! Yeah, someone finally punched rainbow instead of just accepting her apology.
Because Murphy and Luck
I'm always really interessted to see how they react about the main Char being someone else in a situation like this, but I won't ask for more right now, because I think I'm distracted by my work a bit, since I'm still a bit nervous and stuff like that.
However at least I'm sure that I'm enjoying the story so far.
Someone give Luck a cookie, I ran out.
Enderpony link not working :(
7334836 Ok now it's working
7334860
Are any of the others from that picture gonna be in this.
slimepony FTW
7334877 you will just have to wait and find out for yourself.