The Invisible Brony Defense Force

by SoullessDCLXVI

Ultimate

Previously, on IBDF:

Pink Death, the solar priest, has gone insane with grief. It was his actions that resulted in Noteworthy's demise. He is trailing the solar brony retreat.....

The circles have gone to war, the spark that ignited the powder keg was the death of a pony by a solar brony.....

The American military is searching for Princess Celestia.....

Pinkie's witchcraft has unlocked the full potential of the spell that sent our heroes here, but only on said heroes.....

Shirotora, head of the Lunar Bronies, has received word of an impending attack on Ponyville by the Solar bronies.....

Gamer Luna is more popular than Molestia.....

Arrows infinite stash is now bangin'.....

And now, IBDF continues..........

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Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy had gone to thier perspective homes. It was getting late in the day and they all had things to take care of. With Celestia awake and the sisters no longer fighting, even indirectly, the world's weather had returned to normal. Leaving the weather ponies a lot of clean up to take care of. Rainbow Dash was unusually slow to leave our group as a result. That just left the current five members of the BDF; Myself, Pascal, Syntax, Technia, and Arrow with Pinkie Pie, Twilight and the Princesses.

Pinkie's earlier warning of a "doozy" had us all on edge. The Princesses included. Last time Pinkie had a doozy a Hydra had been involved. It may not have been the doozy, but it was still involved. Of course the same reasoning was floating around our heads as well. So we weren't too shocked when we heard a familiar roar. Although, that's not to say we weren't shocked. I mean, that particular roar was pretty darn unexpected.

"Sweet Celestia's perky nipples, is that what I think it is?" Asked Pascal, ignoring the wry smirk and raised eyebrow of the owner of said perky nipples.

"I doubt it. Pretty sure Hulk was the biggest among us.", said Technia, looking eastward towards the sound.

"Snake was a tyrannosaurus once." put forth Arrow

"Yeah, but he could shapeshift." replied Syntax.

"Maybe we have another shapeshifter?" asked Technia

"Well, I can say this. If we do. It's not technically ours." I reply.

"What do you mean, Soulless?" asked Luna.

"It came from the Everfree. Everfree is under complete Solar control."

"That's.. yeah that can't be good. Wait, I have an idea!" and like that Technia ran off into a nearby field. her horn glowing and the ground beneath her trembling.

"Well..... alright then Technia. What's your idea?" I asked, knowing full well she couldn't hear me. Getting the response I expected, none, I turned to the others. "Well, while we wait for.... whatever she's doing... what do you guys wanna do?"

"Um...."

"Ano....." Seriously? The Japanese um? Okay.....

"Yeah, I uh... " Great. We're in Ponyville. And we're bored.

"Ooh ohh! I know!" Pascal, excitedly jumped in place, raising his arm like a kid in school.

"Uh, yeah. Pascal, what you wanna do?" I wasn't confident this would be anything fun... or legal.

Pulling out a baton he pressed a button on it, and it started to arc electricity. "Can we see what 3,000 volts of electricity does to a pony?!" And I was right.

"No, Pascal. That'll probably kill 'em. And if it doesn't, it would certainly hurt 'em. Why would you even....."

"But what if it was an Alicorn?" He asked, his tone like a child begging for candy at the checkout line. I think the green lenses on his mask even manged to get bigger.

"C'mon, man. No."

"But, Celestia could take it." at this Arrow started to beg me with his eyes too. Since when did these bastards start asking my permission for stuff? I'm not their damn leader. Though I'm not gonna let Celestia get electrocuted for fun and profit.

"No no no no just.. no. What is wrong with you?"

"All kinds of things." he responded in an eerily chipper tone. Briefly balancing on his toes as he did so.

"Yeah well--" I was interrupted as that roar from earlier sounded again, this time louder. Glancing Technia's way I saw massive amounts of molten metal spewing form the ground, slowly taking shape. It had to have been fifteen stories tall, and it looked like it was gonna take a while. Whatever the hay it was, it probably wouldn't be finished by the time freaking Godzilla of all things got here. Which it now seemed it was doing. If the rhythmic and increasing seismic activity was anything to go by.

The roar sounded again. This time it was uncomfortably loud, and it's footsteps were making noise too. It seemed Ponyville's residents were finally taking notice. Most had stopped what they were doing and were worriedly watching the Everfree. That stopped though as 1998's New York Godzilla burst into view, followed closely by what could only be the Solar bronies. What the hay were those morons thinking? They were supposed to be invisibly protecting Ponyville. Invisibly. As in not so flippin' visible! Maybe Overture snapped and decided to make an appearance?

Wait, Godzilla the brony just crushed a house and it looked like he was trying to eat ponies? What was going on? "Guys, Godzilla must've gone insane in his current form. We need to snap him out of it!" snapping to attention, (and whatever counted for attention for Pascal) they ran behind be. All of us waving our arms to get Godzilla's attention.

"Dude! What the fuck are you doing?! You're hurting ponies!"

"That's the idea, Padre de la Luna." came an all too familiar, and highly aggravating voice.

"Overture," I hissed, not bothering to turn to look at him. Can't believe I liked his music, once. "Why are you doing this? This goes against all we stand for!"

"All you stand for. Ponyville may be lost. But this is for the good of all of Equestria. Y'know, the greater good? A concept you seem completely unable to grasp, it would seem."

"And you call yourself a brony, I will see that you pay for this!" Knowing I couldn't take on the irradiated lizard, I decided to take on it's master. Pulling out my swords I smiled, "This is gonna be fun.". But to my dissapointment, but not my surprise, he vanished in a pop of light.

"DOUCHEBAG!" I yelled, hoping he'd hear me. Meanwhile behind me, the terror of Tokyo had actually managed to chow down on a few ponies, the sight of which nearly made me cry out in agony. I may be the size of a bee compared to it. But I was prepared to sting.

I, of course wasn't prepared for it's thick hide. And now I was down a sword. Fuck. I thought about running after the monster to retrieve the blade when I noticed something in the sky. Pointed, and oddly shaped for an aircraft, it struck me as familiar. Which I need to stop weirding out about. We're all from Earth. We've all seen the same shit. No matter how odd we are it's all familiar.

"It's the mother fucking Batman." I breathed in awe. Then I realized it technically wasn't actually Batman and stopped being awestruck. Though that didn't last long as the pilot was certainly impressive in his (or her) impersonation of the bat when they launched out of the batwing and glided down to the battlefield. Before landing, he tossed an explosive at Godzilla. Well, at least someone finally managed to get his attention. Though, I don't think the bat was really all that ecstatic at the results. As he only managed to piss him off. Launching toward the dark knight his attention was grabbed by a rather tall black man in a green jersey sporting the number 36. Clearly confused, the dragon like creature did nothing as the basketball player laid into it. Just continued to stare at the man, clearly puzzled as to why the human thought it possible that some mere martial arts could possibly hurt him. He couldn't even feel the punches. Smirking, he prepared to eat the little nuisance when a blonde haired little human boy launched himself at the man, apparently trained in a superior martial art.

Batman, seeing his friend getting laid into and losing, seemed to summon his car out of nowhere. Jumping into it he sped to the pair in an attempt to break up the fight. Unfortunately they didn't seem to notice as the car's engine noise was blotted out by the war cry of a white tiger and the rest of the Lunar bronies who were cresting the hill to the west. The crunch of metal and shattering of glass, however, was easily heard afterwards. Seems batman survived though.

Smiling at the back up, I leaped into the fray. So many pop culture icons were fighting each other it was like a ten year old's drawing. I felt a little bad as I cut off heads and limbs of people I liked from TV. There's just something wrong with beheading the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, y'know?

Our forces had essentially been cut in half, however, as so many Lunar bronies aided in the second mass evacuation Equestria had seen this month. And we were getting fairly beaten back. All around us was chaos, and if there hadn't been so much on the line, I would've sat back and munched on popcorn as I enjoyed the hell out some seriously epic fights.

Ozzy Osbourne was fighting Justin Bieber. (Apparently the Canadian's head tasted fairly bad, as after the most spectacular beheading I've ever seen, Ozzy retched)

Time Turner was fighting Screwloose.

Bloo was fighting Dexter. (The short nerdy ginger)

John Marsten was kickin' Eastwood ass.

Alien and Predator were fighting Michael Meyers and Chucky.

Master Chief was sitting on Duke Nukem "C'mon, say it...."

"No."

"Say it and I'll get up."

"Fuck you!"

"Suit yourself...."

"Alright alright, I give! I give!" sigh "Power Armor is awesome, and I'm super jealous."

"And.....?"

"It's not for pussies...."

"Was that so hard?"

"Get off of me!"

I looked around me for batman, intending to help him with the main weapon of the Solars when I finally spotted him charging at some Russian looking soldier wielding an AK-47. With a well placed batarang he knocked him unconscious and immediatley set his sights on the next solar brony, a tall skinny white kid with a stove top hat. Startled at being targeted by none other than batman he made a grab for his fallen comrades gun, and managed to drop my faith in the bat completely by actually managing to down him. As I had been right by the bat I smiled rather than become fearful as I knew my new skill with my remaining sword would redirect all the bullets that would come for me back to the tall kid.

To our mutual disappointment however, his gun clicked, not tied to the weapon himself the ammo wasn't infinite. Fearing for his life he fled back towards the Everfree.

"That's right you better run!" I shouted gleefully.

"You're welcome." Turning around I saw a T-1000 shifting back from a larger form. I wasn't sure what he had been as I caught the transformation's tail end. But whatever it was had elements of blue and red. Damn it, and I thought I had scared him off.

Well, no need to be bitter about getting my life saved, possibly. "Thank---" at which point the top half of my possible savior disappeared into the gaping maw of Godzilla. "...you." I finished lamely. Faustdammit.

Looking back at the bat I noticed he was still alive, barely. I went to help him up when the skinny kid figured he'd finish off the caped crusader, having returned with a machete. Before he could make it all the way to the prone superhero he tripped and fell. Attached to his leg was a whip, which surged with electricity causing the skinny little fuck to spasm.

"Pascal, you just saved Batman's life. Nice goin' man."

"Really? I just wanted to fry someone. This guy's on the opposite team, right?"

"Uh, yeah man."

"Cool." Taking a bite out of a chocolate bar nonchalantly, he casually electrocuted the the skinny steam punk kid again.

"Where'd you get--"

"Pinkie Pie"

"Right. Carry on."

Godzilla the brony, meanwhile, continued to rampage Ponyville. Much to my chagrin.

"Hey, Syntax!" I called out.

"What is up!" He called back, laughing. Apparently having a grand ol' time.

"Can you shoot the beast in the eye? If he can't see, he can't eat!"

"I don't agree with your logic, Soulless, but either way I can't get a good shot off at this angle. Here," he tossed me a gun, "You got Deadpool's sword ability, maybe you inhereted some of his aim."

"I don't agree with your logic, Syntax."

"But....?"

"But nothing. Your logic is as holey as a changeling priest."

"Whatever man, find someone who can aim then. Prick."

"Hey, bats?" he groaned as turned over, his midriff riddled with holes. Think you can hit that thing in the eye with a deagle?"

"I think I can do that." she said. Huh. "Give me the gun..." still lying on her back she aimed past her feet, her arm trembling in her weakened state. Finally she fired off a shot. However, right as she fired, likely believing the shot to hit, Overtrue appeared on the battlefield just long enough to toss a ninja into the path of the bullet. The ninja's hand exploded. He howled in pain, though he could barely be heard over the din of war.

Two angels, one of which I had fought with when I arrived here, came out of the Everfree carrying someone, likely a friend or the Solar's secret weapon. I dreaded who they could be if it was the latter. They carried him by the armpits while he stroked a Captain Morgan pose. As they got close I could hear them singing.

In the eyes of a ranger,
The unsuspecting stranger,
Had better know the truth of wrong from right,

'Cause the eyes of a ranger are upon you,
Any wrong you do, he's gonna see,

When you're in Texas, look behind you,

'Cause that's where the rangers gonna be.

"Oh, you have got to be fuckin' kiddin' me." I moaned.

"What?" Pascal asked obliviously, still torturing the the Lincoln look-alike. I was about to answer when Chuck Norris answered for me. By kicking Pascal square in the nuts.

"Are you fucking kidding me dude? A nut shot! Seriously?! I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna wear your intestines like a Gala dress you piece of-" I tuned out Pascal and focused on Norris. If this guy was half of those Chuck Norris jokes he'd a force to be reckoned with.

"I am Chuck-Fucking-Norris! I will kill you all! Ah ha ha ha!" Readying my one blade, I took a defensive stance. Seeing me do so, he smiled and slowly made his way toward me. No doubt relishing in the fear on my face. He was nearly in reach when he suddenly disappeared from view. Looking around quickly I saw to my right the broken body of Chuck underneath Bruce Lee.

"You think too highly of yourself, Chuckles." he said, before casually walking back into the heart of the battle.

Taking in my surroundings I was greeted with a wonderful sight. No, it wasn't the entire town of Ponyville on fire. It wasn't the hundreds of dead bodies that littered the ground, it wasn't the vast amount of blood that ran into the storm drains as though it rained the stuff, it was the complete lack of ponies. They had all been safely evacuated. Which also meant our own forces were going to get stronger, soon.

-||-||-||-||-

Meanwhile, just outside of Ponyville

Stone looked through his binoculars at the battle taking place. Without removing them from his face, he brought his radio up his mouth.

"Sgt Hall, report."

"Here sir."

"Those mushrooms you found, and put in our food?"

"Uh.. what about them sir."

"Get rid of them, and make sure no one ever uses them again."

"Yes sir. Permission to speak freely, sir?"

"Granted."

"What's wrong with them?"

Godzilla roared as the Hulk landed on his face.

"Just throw them away, sergeant."

"Yes sir."

Author's Note:

Previously on is 118 words.

It has been exactly one year since I started writing this.

And about a half of one since I stopped. Sorry.

Oh, and Syntax, about the whole German officers cap thing. When you told me about it I had no idea what it was. Google image search may have colored my opinions a bit. Since then I've seen 'em pop up all over the place now that I recognize 'em and I feel like bleedin' idiot. So... sorry?

Comments

[theRedBrony]

Previously, on IBDF:

Looks like you took a lesson straight out of my book!

I honestly thought you gave up on this.

[SoullessDCLXVI]

2846968 If I ever give up on this story (or any others) I'd let people know and mark it as cancelled.

[shirotora]

Fucking Godzila?! I approve

[blazikenking]

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. And just what is Technia building?

[shadowcat009]

2849206 My guess is since we got Godzilla rampaging and the author loves pop culture i'm thinking monster movie, Godzilla vs. Mecha-godzilla

[theRedBrony]

2847218 That's nice of you

[Pascal]

Guess who's back.

Back again.

Soully's back.

Tell a friend.

You had too much fun with this chapter. TOO MUCH FUN!

I have to applaud you for continuing on. I, for one, have more abandoned stories under my belt than anyone has any right, and I know how difficult it is to keep up the steam. I hope you're still enjoying it.

[S1nt4x]

Not one worry regarding the cap my friend! Another great chapter AND the appearance of my 1996 Childhood hero? All of my YES! Take them all!

[Ink Sword]

That stopped though as 1998's New York Godzilla burst into view, followed closely by what could only be the Solar bronies.
[youtube=OX2VaVtFYfs]
First thought that was running through my head.

[caloricmango]

What this chapter reminded me of.

What this chapter became when i imagined it in equestria.

This was an awesome chapter.