The Dragons Better Shape Up, or Else
The Dragons Better Shape Up, or Else
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The tubby anthropomorphic cat stops screaming as we finish warping into my Equestria, miles above the ground.
He looks around, confused, before glaring at me as I float before him, both forelegs crossed. “How dare you just yank me like that when I was going to make that Teen Titan brat pay for what she did to me?! Do you know who I am?!”
“A Displaced who turned into the tubby brother of Beerus the Destroyer God of Universe 6 in Super,” I say, uncaring.
He winces, his eyes narrowing. “I am not tubby!”
I scoff. “Puh-lease. If Champa is a total lard ass who does nothing but stuffs his face with whatever food he can get his tubby grubby hands on and you’ve become him, you are tubby, lard ass.”
“He went toe to toe with Beerus!” the cat snarls, pointing at me.
I scoff again. “Yeah, sure. I went there and checked it out. Beerus was holding back, you moron. Frankly, Champa’s let himself go so much I guarantee you Goku could beat him and take over as Universe 6’s Destroyer God if he wanted to.”
“That’s it,” Champa, I guess I’ll call him, snarls, holding and outstretched hand, a sphere of red energy appearing before it. “You die, whoever you are!”
The sphere fires, heading right towards me.
I roll my eyes and open my mouth.
Champa’s mouth hangs open in both shock and likely horror as the orb enters my open maw, I chew for a few seconds, before swallowing and belching.
“Bu-bu-but HOW?!” he backs up in the air, his eyes wide with terror. “Tha-that was Destruction Energy. Even Golden Frieza couldn’t stand up to one that powerful.”
I smirk. “Frieza wasn’t me.” I shift into my anthro form, before my expression firms. I clench my fists at my sides. “Hah!’ I start yelling, energy beginning to billow around me.
Champa’s eyes widen. “No… it can’t be.”
“HAH!” my yell goes to deafening levels as a purple light flashes around me, my hair going up like Goku’s when he goes Super Saiyan and turning purple.
“Wha… that’s not from the show,” Champa stutters, looking like he wants to make a break for it.
“You’re right,” I say, giving him a grim look. “This is my own spin on Super Saiyan Blue. Say hello to Super Saiyan Choas.”
Champa trembles for a few moments, before his expression hardens. “Alright. Bring it, ya pastel pony! I’ll show you what a Destroyer God can really do!”
We both charge at each other, our fists colliding, causing a massive explosion of light.
___________________________________________________________
“And that’s pretty much how I spent my morning,” I say as I walk next to Twilight and Rarity as we covertly follow Spike, the latter of whom is glowing.
We’re walking into the Dragon Lands. Spike’s being called by the Dragon Lord and Twilight and Rarity want to make sure he doesn’t get hurt and so they can learn about dragon customs.
The former reason I can easily understand on both sides. Spike’s Twilight’s son, of course a mother would want to make sure her child stays safe.
And Rarity is a good friend. She doesn’t care for Spike beyond a good friend, but that’s reason enough for her to want to make sure he stays safe too.
Though why the Dragon Lord is calling Spike of all dragons, I’m honestly puzzled. Then again, I’m puzzled why he’d be calling me too. I mean, I only turned into a dragon a short while ago. Is he calling more than just Spike and myself and this is something all dragons are being called for?
“And this… Champa won’t be bothering either of our worlds again, I take it?” Rarity asks, still looking like she doesn’t fully understand… which makes sense. I didn’t exactly explain what Dragonball is, so explaining Super is pretty much going to go right over her head.
I shake my head, looking down at her. I’ve taken on the appearance of a dragon version of myself. I’m taller than Spike and more lanky, but with muscle and a feminine look the other purple drake lacks. I also ended up with wings. Not sure why Spike hasn’t gotten his yet. I really need to look into dragon biology at some point. Of course, being a dragon means I’m glowing now too, but whatever.
“He won’t. After pummelling him to pieces, though not literally of course, I shoved him back into his Equestria. They’re his problem, not ours, not that they’ll have much of a problem with him anyway. And I sealed off his universe, so he can’t travel to others.”
“And that one you took him from?” Twilight cocks an eyebrow.
I shrug. “They’ll be fine. They’ve got the Teen Titans watching over it and I helped their Discord reseal their universe. No other parallel Equestrias will be interfering with them aside from the one on the other side of the mirror.”
We arrive a few minutes later, Rarity and Twilight hiding within a fake rock.
“Why’re you being a dragon, though?” Spike asks look down at me from atop the fake rock as I lean against it.
I just grin. “Cuz I wanna. Need I any other reason?”
He shrugs. “Fair point.”
“Hey-hey, look!” says a voice I recognize and immediately deadpan. “It’s our old friend Sparkle-warkle.”
Spike joins my deadpanning. “It’s Spike.”
Garble gives mocking fluttery eyes. “Are you sure your pony friends didn’t give you a pony name?”
“Are you sure you didn’t leave whatever counts are you brain back under whatever rock you crawled out from under?” I shoot back. Man, I hate this guy.
Garble blinks, seeming surprised to find another dragon near Spike, before he narrows his eyes. “Why’re you hanging around this pathetic excuse for a dragon?”
I raise an eyebrow. “Oh, you mean a dragon who is royalty by being the adopted son of one of Equestria’s pony princesses, whom was also the pony whose magic hatched him? The same dragon who has magical fire breath?” I smirk. “What’s so special about you, Babble? What magic do you have?”
He glares. “It’s Garble.”
I shrug. “Guess you’re parents got it right then. All you talk is garbled rubbish.”
His nostrils start steaming, while Spike smirks.
Garble glares at Spike, before hopping up and knocking the smaller drake off the rock.
Spike glares up at him. “Hey! That’s my rock!”
Garble smirks down at him. “Oh, really? Then why aren’t you sitting on it?”
The teenage dragons with him start laughing, but are silenced when I leap up, giving Garble a spin kick that sends him flying off the rock and crashing to the ground.
“Your rock, oh, Prince Spike, the Brave and Glorious,” I say, landing at his feet and bowing.
Spike blinks, before he seems to catch on and smirks back, standing up and waving a hand. “Thank you, my loyal subject. You did well.”
“Hey!” Garble grumbles (pretty much whines, really, talk about pathetic), as he gets up, looking at me incredulously. “What was that for? Why are you helping this pony-loving wimp when you could be with a tough guy, like me?”
Wait. Did he just try to defend himself and try hitting on me at the same time?
Okay, time to really take this dragon’s ego down a peg.
I cross my arms. “Oh, yeah. Big and strong dragon, you are. Picking on a baby dragon makes you so much tougher. Ya know, instead of taking on opponents your own age or older, you’re proving you’re so much stronger by attacking a dragon less than half your size and age. Hey, every drake!” I call out, grabbing the attention of all the other dragons.
“Uh, Screwball, what’re you doing?” Twilight whispers from within the fake rock.
“I got this, Twi. Don’t worry,” I whisper back with a wink, before looking around at the crowd. “Garble here says he’s the toughest dragon around. Know how he proves it? Does he fight an Ursa Major? Does he try fighting a hydra? Any creatures way bigger than he is?”
I glance at Garble and I can see the panic entering his eyes as his slow brain finally seems to piece together exactly what I’m doing, but realizes he can’t stop me.
I grin, returning my attention to the crowd. “No, he doesn’t do any of that. Instead, he tries taking advantage of a baby dragon. Isn’t that so much harder to do? He’s such a strong dragon, being able to take on a baby. And that’s after he tried to destroy defenceless unhatched phoenix eggs several years ago. He’s so tough, am I right?”
It takes a moment, but I see the combined smirks and looks of disgust forming on all the dragons present as they realize what I’ve said.
I just lean back against the fake rock, my arms folded, and watch the magic happen. This is going to be a good show.
“A baby?” a brown female dragon scoffs. “Seriously? Is that all he can fight against?”
“My little sister hasn’t even molted yet and she’s taken on a Tatzlwurm ten times her size,” an orangey-brown dragon says, folding his arms. “Sure, my dad and me had to save her in the end, but she held her own for a long while and she’s way younger than Garble.”
“And attacking defenceless eggs?” a black male dragon snarls, absolute disgust on his face. “We dragon may like seeing or hearing about weak kind creatures getting defeated… but that’s just disgusting!”
Things are to escalate further, but a loud booming voice causes us all to turn and I gape for a moment.
Holy freaking shit, that dragon is huge! Just how bloody old must he be? I guess this is the Dragon Lord.
“Dragons of Equestria, hear me!” he booms. Is there a dragon version of the Royal Canterlot Voice, because either there is, or this guy just has a really loud voice and loves shouting. “I have been Dragon Lord for longer than many of you can remember, and my reign has been extraordinary!” There’s a pause, before he glares. “Agree with me!”
The dragons are make general agreeing noises, before they all start chanting, “Torch! Torch! Torch! Torch!”
“Who is that?” Spike asks, pointing.
Garble rolls his eyes. “It’s Dragon Lord Torch, dummy.”
“Yes, because a dragon who’s lived his whole life outside of the Dragon Lands and only ever came once for the Dragon Migration would know about a ruler of the land he doesn’t live in,” I snark, which causes Garble to glare at me.
He does not like me… and I’m loving every second of it.
Spike shakes his head, before pointing again. “No, next to him.”
I follow where he’s pointing and see a dragon a foot or so taller than I currently am, but otherwise looks the same, if a little pointier and blue.
Garble blinks, before shrugging. “That’s his daughter, Princess Ember.” He smirks, leaning down to Spike’s level. “I wouldn’t even look at her if I were you, unless you want Torch to eat you!”
Spike gulps.
I roll my eyes. “Yes, because I’m sure the Dragon Lord would want to create an international incident between the Dragon Lands and Equestria by murdering one of the royal family.”
Garble looks at me like I just at me like I just said the sky was brown and grass is blue. “You honestly think those puny ponies would stand a chance against the dragons?” He thumbs a fist to his chest for enphasis.
“Princess Celestia controls the sun,” I say flatly. “Controls a giant ball of flaming gas that can obliterate anything on the planet. War over, dragons extinct. Ponies, unware a war even happened, it was over so fast.”
“I… um…” Garble moves to protest, but pauses and seems to actually think about what I said. Slowly, his face morphs into absolute horror.
I smirk. “Yeah. Ponies Master Race. Truth hurts, huh?”
Garble and his friends clam up, wilting, barely listening as the Dragon Lord continues, too lost in their own thoughts of just how fucked the dragons would be if Equestria really stepped up to the plate.
Sure, Celestia likely would never actually use her magic and bond with the sun for such a genocidal thing… but he doesn’t know that and I’m not going to tell him.
I do feel Twilight and Rarity giving me disapproving looks for painting Celestia in such a manner, but this dragon needed a large serve of Humble Pie and it was long overdue.
“Unfortunately, according to dragon law, it is time for me to step down.” Torch puts a claw to his chest, looking crestfallen. “Sad, I know.” He opens an eye before glaring. “Be sad!”
All the dragons at once start crying… though I’m pretty sure Garble’s tears a genuine after what I just told him and the realization hit him that Torch’s successor isn’t likely to be as strong as him, making things worse for the dragons.
Dragon Lord Torch then explains how the new Dragon Lord will be chosen and I’m actually rather intrigued by it. It’s called the Gauntlet of Fire. Whomever retrieves a bloodstone sceptre, a staff with a large red jewel atop it, from the heart of the flame-cano (yeah, I rolled my eyes at that too) will be crowned the new Lord of the Dragons.
Torch tosses the sceptre, which is really fresaking teeny compared to his claw and the sceptre vanishes from sight, the dragons, myself included, stop glowing. Interesting.
Torch looks around at us all. “The Gauntlet is dangerous, for I designed it myself! Only dragons with my ferocity, strength, and determination will be able to finish. We will gather at the cliff when the sun is at its peak!”
I frown, cocking an eyebrow. I feel there’s more to this, maybe even more than Torch himself seems to understand.
Spike gulps. “I don’t want to be Dragon Lord or dragon toast, and I stopped glowing, so let’s sneak out of here!” He jumps down and starts pushing the rock away.
“I don’t think it’s that easy,” I murmur, looking to Torch, who’s eyes are scanning everyone.
“Ah!” And there is it. “Where do you think you’re going, little dragon?!”
At once the dragons around us part into two straight lines, leaving the two of us and our still undiscovered friends wide in the open.
“Good one, oh, Spike the Brave and Glorious,” I deadpan.
Spike freezes in place, whirling around and waves nervously. “Oh, uh, hi, your Lordship. Uh, I was just going home!”
Torch lowers his head til he’s inches from us (Okay, he is even bigger than I thought and I’m actually a tiny bit afraid now, despite everything). “You don’t get to leave unless I say you can!”
I was afraid of that.
Princess Ember lands right next to Spike, looking calm. “Dad, look at him.” She puts a claw on his head. “He’s just a runt.” I have to hold back snickers at Spike’s deadpan. Hey, you brought this on yourself, buddy, “Besides, he doesn’t even wanna compete. Let him go.”
Torch thinks it over, before giving a small grin. “He is rather tiny,” he chuckles.” I could squish him with my pinky claw.” He chuckles again.
Spike joins in nervously.
Torch deadpans. “That wasn’t a joke. It was a fact. When I want you to laugh, I will say "be amused!".”
Spike nods anxiously. “Of course, your Lordship! I, uh, guess I don’t understand dragon customs. Another reason why I shouldn’t compete.”
I cock an eyebrow. Spike, really?
“Hm.” Torch rubs his chin, then sighs, waving a claw. “Very well then, little dragon. I release you.”
Spike grins. “Thank you!” then he points to Ember like he’s a hipster or something. “And thank you.”
I join Ember in rolling eyes.
I sigh though, deciding I’ll just return to normal and go back to Equestria once Torch isn’t looking anymore, when a loud grunt from him causes me to look back.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he says to his closed claw, opening it to reveal Ember.
Ember looks firmly at him. “To prepare for the Gauntlet.”
Torch shakes his head dismissively. “No, you’re not. You’re not much bigger than that runt I just sent home!”
I deadpan. Wow, thanks Torch. Way to build up confidence in the younger dragons, telling them they’re too small. Brilliant.
Ember stands her ground though. “But I’m smarter than most of these boulderheads and you know it!”
I look at Garble, who’s walking off to mingle among the other dragons and smirk. She’s not wrong.
Torch just scoffs. “Being smart won’t help you win this Gauntlet! It was designed for a big, strong dragon to win, because it takes a big, strong dragon to lead! Besides, I said no!”
Oh, I am staying as far away from this as I can. I turn and head off to follow Spike. I can at least make sure none of the other dragons try anything stupid before he leaves.
“Ha,” a light-purple female dragon I met at the migration, named Maar says. “When I become Dragon Lord, I will make burps an official greeting!”
“Ha, you? Please!” a brown dragon male with a long face scoffs. “When I win, I will pillage Equestria for all their pillows. Why should these ponies be comfortable while we sleep on rocks?”
“Maybe if dragons actually were nicer, ponies would be more willing to share their pillows, so you wouldn’t have to steal them to begin with?” I suggest.
The two look to each other, before scoffing with a simultaneous dismissive, “Nah!”
“That’s nothing!” Garble starts. “When I’m in charge, the first thing I’ll do is get revenge on those puny pon… uh…” he trails off, noticing me, an eyebrow cocked at him and he seems to remember what I said about Celestia and the flaming ball of gas she could bring down any time she wishes and obliterate every dragon within seconds.
“Well?” Maar asks, cocking an eyebrow in confusion. “You’ll get revenge on those puny pon-what, exactly?”
“N-never mind,” he says, scuttling off and sitting down, rocking back and forth, hugging his knees.
The other two look to each other in bewilderment.
“The heck’s up with him?” Barry asks, jabbing a thumb in Garble’s direction.
“He’s just wised up to the world,” I smirk, walking off, leaving the other two just as confused as before.
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I hope that burping dragon wins,” Rarity remarks from within their hiding place as I return to them.
“None of them can win!” Spike says anxiously. “Equestria’s in big trouble if any of them are in charge!”
I frown, folding my arms. “Hmm, big trouble? No. But it would still be a problem. Sure, a few shows of force might stop them for a while, but dragons are stubborn, so they’ll keep trying if their leader wishes it. No offense, Spike.”
He shrugs. “I can’t deny I can be stubborn.” He ponders. “Though I honestly thought I got it from Twilight.”
I smirk as purple horse puffs her cheeks in anger, before shaking her head, her expression turning to worry. “But what can we do?”
Spike sighs, before his expression firm. “There’s only one thing to do, and only I can do it! I have to win the Gauntlet of Fire!”
___________________________________________________________
“What do you mean you have to win the Gauntlet?” Rarity demands after all the dragons have moved off to await the start of the Gauntlet of Fire.
“It’s the only way to protect Equestria from the dragons,” Spike says firmly. “You heard them! They have horrible plans for ponies if they win! So somehow, I have to do it!”
“Annoying plans, maybe,” I shrug. “But that’s about it, really. I’m pretty sure Garble would’ve been the worst to worry about and he’s easily been scared into a position where, even if he does become Dragon Lord, he’ll keep as far away from ponies as he possible can, for fear of utter annihilation.”
“I still don’t approve of how you did that,” Twilight gives me a disapproving look.
“Hey, it saved Equestria, didn’t it?” I say, holding my claws out in the “eh” pose.
Twilight frowns, looking to Spike. “There has to be another way. It’s too dangerous. Besides, if you win, you’d have to stay here! Maybe Screwball could take part?”
“Eenope,” I say with Big Mac’s voice, folding my arms. “No can do, Sparkle. Taking power of an entire country would be tantamount to what Discord did back when he tried to take over Equestria. Sure, I could win it fair and square, but I’m not a real dragon. Pretty sure a pony pretending to be a dragon is not allowed to rule.”
“Though you could easily make sure the dragons don’t do anything bad by…” Twilight trails off, her shoulders sagging. “No, wait. You’re right. That does sound exactly like how Discord would’ve ruled.”
Spike nods. “I know I’d have to stay, but there’s no other way to keep my friends safe.”
“And, if need be, I’ll leave a copy of myself to guard Spike,” I reassure, slapping the little drake on the back. “Like I’d leave a friend all alone in a land he’s never lived in before.”
Twilight thinks it over, before, reluctantly, nodding. “Well, if you’re staying to compete, then we’re staying to cheer you on!”
We make our way over to where all the other dragons are awaiting the signal to start.
Torch looks around at the crowd and notices Spike, frowning slightly. “I thought I released you, tiny one!”
Spike nods nervously. “I decided to compete. I am a dragon, after all.”
Garble looks to Spike… and I notice no anger or scorn in his expression. “Are you sure? You can’t even fly!”
The other dragons start laughing, but stop at a look from Torch.
“All dragons are welcome to compete,” he says firmly, before looking right at Spike, “but they do so at their own peril! Flying to Flame-cano Island is the first of many challenges you will face in your quest to find the bloodstone sceptre!” he roars, expelling a torrent of flame, which I guess is the signal to start.
“Uh… later,” Garble says, flying off, a look of urgency in his expression.
“Huh. Odd,” Rarity remarks. “Knowing him, I would have expected him to try something with Spikey. Throw him off the cliff into the water or something.
I look to Spike. “Ready, buddy.”
He takes a deep breath, before nodding and dives into the water, with myself flying close by.
“You can do it, Spike!” Rarity’s voice makes me look behind us to see her and Twilight… disguised as a clump of seaweed. Okay then.
Things seem to be going alright at first. The other dragons aren’t even thinking of swimming, making them easy targets for the rocks being thrown through the air.
Suddenly, a giant orang sea worms rise up, roaring, one of them managing to smack Garble in the face with a jet of water, knocking him back, causing him to hit a dragon wearing golden armour, throwing them off, making them to fall into the liquid below, where they sink like a stone.
“He’s gonna drown!” Spike cries, hurrying forward, before diving.
“Spike!” Twilight cries in alarm.
He comes up a few moments later and starts dragging the other dragon to the shore of a small island nearby, it being far closer than the starting point.
“Hey, are you okay?” he asks as they seem to return to consciousness.
The light-blue dragon coughs, getting the water out of her lungs, Spike taking off her helmet to help them, revealing...
Spike gasps. “Princess Ember!”
Ember get up. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Only saving your ungrateful scales!”
Ember blinks, looking to a patch of seaweed. “Did that seaweed just talk?” She pushes Spike aside gently and pulls the seaweed back, revealing the two horns equines. “Ponies?!” she steps back, putting her hands on her hips, looking to Spike. “What are they doing here?” she directs the question at Spike.
“They’re my friends!” Spike quickly defends.
Ember frowns sceptically. “Friends? Dragons don’t do friends.”
Spike frowns back, pointing to himself. “Well, this dragon does.”
“And this one, too,” I said, snapping my claw, turning back into a pony, smirking. “Though, technically, I am a pony, too.” Another snap and I’m a dragon again.
Ember blinks for a several moments, my actions probably causing her to have a brain fart, before she shakes her head and takes her helmet back from Spike. “Whatever. I don’t care as long as none of you get in my way. I have a Gauntlet to win.”
Spike cocks an eyebrow in confusion. “But I thought your dad said that—”
I don’t even have time to facepalm before Ember rounds on him, her nostrils flaring. “I don’t care what my dad said! I’ll show him and every dragon who thinks I’m just a little princess there are better things than being big and strong!”
I smirk. “Amen, sister.”
A loud thwacking sound, followed by a scream makes us all look up as Garble crashing to the ground not far from us, a bolder pinning him to the ground.
Ember hastily puts her helmet back on, as do Twilight and Rarity their seaweed disguise.
Garble grunts for a few moments, trying in vain to get the boulder off of him, before noticing us and reaches out a hand and I notice there’s real fear in his eyes. “Don’t leave me here, Spike!”
Spike looks from me to the hidden ponies, more specifically his mother, before sighing and goes over, helping Garble get out from under the boulder.
Garble looks to him, that fear still in his eyes, before he falters, sniffing the air, a perplex expression coming over him. “You even smell like ponies.”
The he frowned, looking around.
“Or… is the smell coming from over… here?” he ask, moving towards the seaweed in which Rarity and Twilight are hiding.
I’m about to snap my claw to teleport him back into the air, but stop mid snap as Ember steps in front of him.
“Uh, that’s just me,” she says, deepening her voice. “I, uh… robbed some ponies on my way over here.”
Garble’s reaction is not one I was honestly expecting.
His eyes widen in terror and he grabs Ember by the shoulders. “Are you insane?! Are you trying to get us all killed by their princess?!”
Ember just stares back, glaring not have expecting that response either and it causing her to have a brain fart.
Garble frowns. “Wait. Have I met you before? You kinda remind me of—”
“They’re… my old neighbour,” Spike leaps in front of Ember, clearly trying to make sure Garble doesn’t find out Ember’s identity and blab it to her father.
Garble cocks an eyebrow in confusion. “Wait. You had a neighbour who was a dragon that steals from ponies? You, of all creatures, are okay with that?”
“Well… I did say old,” Spike shrugs. “They moved away because, well, the ponies didn’t let getting robbed.”
Nice save.
Garble looks from Spike to Ember, before shaking his head. “Whatever. I got a gauntlet to win to make sure dragons like them don’t get us killed.”
With that, he flies off, not even saying another word.
“Huh. No insults thrown at me this time,” Spike says, frowning in confusion. “This is getting weird.”
Ember takes off her helmet, looking at Spike with confusion herself. “Why did you help him? And why did you cover for me instead of ratting me out? You could’ve had two less competitors.
Spike smiles. “I could ask you the same thing. You could’ve told Garble about my friends.”
Not that he would’ve done much to them, especially upon seeing the Alicorn among us.
She doesn’t answer, instead looking to all the dragons trying to avoid all the flying boulders, one of them making a Wilhelm scream as they get hit and fall.
Ember winces. “Yikes... That looks rough.” She sighs. “But that’s what makes it a challenge.”
Spike shakes his head. “Are you kidding? Those boulders are huge!” He thinks for a moment, before smiling. “Hey, what if we worked together?”
Ember narrows her eyes at him.
“You fly me up there, and I’ll help look out for boulders, like a second set of eyes!” Spike explains.
Sounds reasonable enough to me.
“Pssst!”
We look to the clump of seaweed, which collapses the moment Spike touches it.
“Spike!” we glance around, before noticing a… tree stump with two eyes, waving one of its branches.
A tree stump? Really? When there’s barely any trees around? How exactly is that a good disguise? And why do I suddenly have the feeling this won’t be the last time Rarity is involved in a really pathetic excuse for a disguise?
Spike goes over, myself hanging back with Ember.
“I know dragons don’t normally help each other, but, don’t you think it would be smart?” I ask her, pulling her attention away from the dragons still trying, and failing, to avoid the boulders. “Think about it. Ponies are pretty tough and have overcome a lot of things because they work together. Plus, being friends with Equestrian royalty can only end better for the new Dragon Lord, right?”
She frowns, then looks to me questioningly. “Why did that dragon think your princess could kill us?”
I blink, before snickering. “Oh, that? I was sick of him picking on Spike, so I told him how, since Twilight hatched him and her magical energy imprinted into him, which is what gives him his magic fire, he was insulting royalty.”
Ember blinks, before facepalming. “Wow. That’s incredibly stupid. No way would things go well if he became Dragon Lord. Though I’m wondering why he thinks your pony princess would kill anyone.”
…
Nope. I’m leaving that can of worms firmly closed.
“Still,” Ember walks over to Spike. “Hey, you, little fella! I’ve thought about it, and your plan makes sense. Let’s do it.”
Spike zips over, grinning and holding out a claw. “Really? Great! It’s a deal!”
Ember rolls her eyes, but shakes. “Just so you know, this doesn’t mean we’re gonna pick flowers or exchange necklaces or whatever pony friends do.”
I roll my eyes, but follow after them.
A few minutes later, Ember lands in front of a large entrance to a cave, Spike hopping off her back. “So what do we do now?”
Ember points to the cave. “I think we go through there.”
A loud roar of flame spews from the cave, several dragons, burned to a crisp, clumsily fly out.
A yelp causes us to look to the side to see Rarity and Twilight, a faint trace of teleportation spell hanging around them. “Oh, that looks scary! I mean, you can do it!”
Nice save, Rarity.
Ember looks to Spike. “Listen, Spike. I wouldn’t have made it this far without you. So I guess, if you want to, we could keep working together. I mean, just until we get through that tunnel.”
Spike grins. “Okay!”
The challenges in the cave are interesting. The cave has stalactites and stalagmites that are positioned like a jaw and opening a closing. Most dragons get caught, but we make our way through with no problem.
Next, we traverse through a corridor filled with crystal pillars that come from every which way, making us really have to maneuverer around carefully, Spike even saving Ember at one point from being crushed.
Nodding to each other, we make our way through the rest of the tunnel, which opens into a large cavern, filled with small lava pools and many different stone walkways, all leading in multiple directions and crisscrossing with each other.
“Oh, you made it!” Looking to our left are two rocks with eyes, with what I can detect as a faint aura of a teleport spell. “Oh, we were so worried!”
Spike waves a claw, scoffing. “About us? That tunnel was cake!”
Which he immediately follows up by fainting.
Ember gives a small smile, before frowning, looking to the rocks. “Wait. How did you two get through?”
“Magic, obviously,” I shrug, before the whole place starts rumbling, Rarity losing her balance and starts to tip over the edge of the platform.
“Rarity!” Spike rushes forward before I can do anything, grabs her and pulls her back up.
Recovering her wits, Rarity cheers, “Oh, thanks, Spike!”
He shrugs. “It was nothing.”
Ember gapes. “Nothing? You just risked everything to save her! And they’re putting themselves in danger just to support you!”
… She does know how well ponies can defend themselves, right?
Spike just shrugs again. “Well, that’s just what friends do. Don’t you have anyone who looks out for you?”
Ember looks away. “Not really. Unless I count you.” She blinks, before her expression firms. “Which I don’t! Because we were only helping each other get through the tunnel, and now we’re through the tunnel, so that’s it.”
Spike looks confused. “Wait, what do you mean?”
Ember looks firmly at him. “Well, there’s only one winner, one sceptre and one Dragon Lord. So I guess it’s every dragon for themselves.”
“Oh,” Spike’s expression sags and I have to resist the urge to hug the poor guy. “So we aren’t really friends?”
Ember sighs. “Maybe if we were in Ponyland, but like I said, dragons don’t do friendship.”
We head off ourselves, Twilight, Rarity and Spike discussing Ember and her ditching us. Despite his mother and Rarity voicing their opinion that Spike’s better off, since Ember is just like every other dragon, I have to give the little guy credit for refusing to accept what they’re saying, that he sees there’s a good person in Ember.
Odd that the son of the Princess of Friendship is able stick to the friendship title better than his own mother in this instance.
“Is it just me, or have we seen this crevasse three times already?” Twilight’s out of context question pulls me from my inner thoughts and I look around, cocking an eyebrow. This area does look familiar.
Spike shrugs. “It’s kinda hard to tell. They all look the same.” He pauses, before cheering, “Except for this one!”
He points and runs to a tunnel entrance that has a different red glow than some of the others.
Following him in, we find it’s exactly where we needed to be. At the end of a winding rock path, suspended above a very long drop, held with a large formation of red crystals is the Bloodstone sceptre.
“Look!” Spike’s voice calls, though I swear I hear a second voice.
“We made it!” Spike cheers, leaping in delight. “I can’t believe I’m the only dragon to make it this far!”
“You’re not!” Whirling around, we see Garble, but he’s not alone. He’s holding back another dragon, who has a colour palette that reminds me of Cheerlie. He’s holding her by the face… and she’s unconscious.
Without any care, he tosses her away, her body going over the edge.
“Oh no!” the two disguised ponies cry.
Garble turns at the sound of their voices, but I’m not paying attention anymore.
Briefly forgetting I have magic and that I’m not actually a dragon, I zip through the air, diving fast, flying down and catching the unconscious dragoness.
Remembering I have magic, I do a quick scan and sigh with relief. She’s just unconscious and nothing more. Bit bruised up and had a bit of a nasty wallop to the head, betting Garble can take credit for that, but otherwise, she’s okay and will be fine.
I fly back up, carrying the younger dragon in my arms… only to blink as I see Ember brawling with Garble. She came back? Wait. Where’s—?
“Leave her alone!”
The magical roar sends shivers down my spine as I feel the magic of the Dragon Lord running through my currently draconic body.
Garble pauses, letting go of Ember, staring up in disbelief. “What? You?! You have the sceptre?!” His eyes widen. “But that means that you’re...”
Ember nods. “The Dragon Lord. Dragon Lord Spike.”
She kneels, followed by all the other dragons who seem to have been coming around the corner as she and Garble fought and I join them, helping the dragon I saved do so as she returns to consciousness.
Garble groans, reluctantly kneeling and saying, “Dragon... Lord... Spike...”
“That’s right!” Spike says firmly, before faltering. “Uh...” Then he gets a devious smile. “Now, go start your long journey home. And give every dragon you see on the way a hug. Don’t tell them why.”
I have to strain not to burst out laughing.
Garble looks mortified. “Awww! But that’ll be super embarrassing!”
Spike sneers pointing the sceptre at him. “I command you to do it!”
“I can’t believe this...” Garble grumbles, hugging the nearest dragon… who seems way too happy about it, before he trudges off.
Ember smiles as Twilight, Rarity and I join her. “Dragon Lord Spike. Hmm, has a nice ring to it.”
Spike hands the sceptre to her, a flash of red magic indicating its power being shifted. “Dragon Lord Ember sounds a lot better.”
Ember stares in shock, before holding it back out to him. “What? No. You’re the Dragon Lord now.”
Spike shakes his head, pushing it back. “The Dragon Lord is whoever brings the sceptre back to your father! Besides, you’ll make a great leader. I was just doing this to protect the ponies. But I know you’ll protect them just as well as I would have.”
Though, it likely would’ve been more protecting the dragons from doing something stupid to earn Equestria’s wrath. Ignoring our flaming ball of gas wielding princess, we have the Lord of Chaos, whom is friends with a Pegasus mortally afraid of dragons.
And if a dragon did anything bad to her… I would honestly be surprised if the Dragon Lands will still existed afterwards.
Ember looks uncertainly from the sceptre back to him. “You sure about this?”
Spike nods. “Absolutely. My home is in Equestria with my friends.”
Ember smiles. “Well, you’ll have at least one friend here too.” Spike hugs her. “What are you doing?”
“It’s called a hug!”
You’d think she’d have figured that out from Spike’s final order to Garble during his very brief stint as Dragon Lord.
“Oh,” Ember looks uncertain, but smile. “I don’t know if I like it. But... okay.”
“Awww!” Twilight whispers in a hushed voice, Rarity giggling.
I blink, before making a small watch appear. The arrow is pointing to Possible, But There’s Another Candidate Nearby.
I glance at Rarity in confusion and the arrow immediately moves to AS FUCKING IF and I shrug, making it disappear.
Ember and the other dragons move out after Twilight has a brief chat with the new Dragon Lord and the four of us come together.
“Shall we?” I ask, holding up a claw.
At a nod from the others, I snap my claw… and we all blink in confusion as we find ourselves still in the Dragon Lands, but far enough away that I don’t think any of the dragons will notice us.
As we start walking, a booming laugh rings out loud and clear “Attention Dragons, hear me! I present to you our new Dragon Lord, Ember!”
We each smile to each other, before something else catches my ears and I prick them up a little.
“Hmm? What is the meaning of this?!”
“I can’t tell you!” Garble’s exasperated voice replies.
I snicker. Oh, if only I’d been there.
Eh. Maybe I was. I might go back in time to see that play out some other time. We’ll see.
“You did well, Spike,” Twilight says proudly. “With Ember as Dragon Lord, the ponies will be safe and you’ve gained us a powerful ally.”
Spike grins. “And a new friend!”
“Plus, Ember said I could write to her anytime I had questions about dragon culture!” Twilight grins, levitating a book she’d been dotting info into all this time. “With this much information, I’ll be able to write a whole book on dragons!”
“Just don’t go overboard with the questions, Sparkle,” I say, grinning.
Twilight looks offended. “I wouldn’t ask too many questions1”
I snort, rolling my eyes. “Yeah, right. I know you, Sparklebutt. Whatever number of questions you’re thinking are reasonable to ask Ember in a short amount of time, divide them by about a thousand, than do so with the final number again.”
She puffs out her cheeks, then looks away, grambling under her breath about how rude I’m being to scholars who have wanted to learn about dragon culture.
“And I gained tons of ideas for a new line of camouflage clothing!” Rarity chirps, changing the subject. “I think I’ll call it Camo-Maud!”
“So, Screwball,” Spike asks, looking to me. “You gonna change back into a pony already?”
I blink, looking down at myself. I frown, thinking for a minute.
“Yeah,” I say, putting my claws behind my head. “But I’m making some changes to my base form.”
That causes the other three to look at me in confsion.
“But why, darling?” Rarity asks, looking worried. “Your old look is just fine. Why would you change it?”
“Couple reason, if I’ll be honest,” I say, looking up at the sky. “I miss some things I don’t have in my pony form. I wanna have them at all times.”
“So…?” Twilight asks uncertainly.
I grin, snapping my claw. There’s a flash of light. When it fades, I’m a pony again, but with a key difference.
“I miss being able to use these,” I wiggle my fingers on my hands. My formlegs have been replaced with arms, my forehooves with hands. “Lyra’s gonna be so jealous!”
Rarity, Twilight and Spike look to each other uncertainly.
“So, the changes you made are hands instead of hooves?” the princess asks.
“Yep,” I say, standing on my hind legs. “And Pinkie makes standing on two legs with this body type seem normal. I may as well be able to take advantage of it sometimes.”
Spike raises and eyebrow. “Sometimes.”
I shrug. “Why not? I’m the Princess of Chaos and I’m usually floating around anyway. Plus, with hands, I can do this.”
I snap my fingers, causing a bunch of My Leg memes to float around Twilight’s head.
She waves them off angrily, where they puff into smoke as I look fondly down at my new digits. “I finally figured out why I love going to the EQG world so much. I can snap my fingers. Why should DD have all the fun with these bad boys?”
The others all look to each other, before they all shrug and we continue on our path home to Ponyville.
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It's a screwed-up life for us
Who os the other candidate for spike's love
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who ever said it was an oc?
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No no, meant who is*
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she's in the show
HOLY SHIT
*VIBRATION*
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Obviously not rarity, the only other 2 females in the area were Twi and Screwball, but I doubt it is either of them
Its alive!!!
Brilliant chapter.
Oh hey... didn't expect to see you here
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it's not a pony
Yaaaaaaaay. New chapter
9389400
Guessing you haven't seen S8
9389448
Was in a earlier season mindset
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Smoulder?
IT LIVES, also happy 2019 .. and is it Twilight? or Smolder?
It's still going thank god, I was scared this wasn't going to be updated again.
For anyone that missed the cameo here it is.
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Twilight is his mom in this. So definitely not her
9389463
OH! Knew that description sounded familiar. I just completely forgot about her.
damn, you surprised me
Pony Master Race
Celestia can erase them.
Luna can crush them or torment their dreams.
Cadance can enslave them with her brainwashing love spells.
Twilight can do all of the above and more.
Be afraid, be very afraid Garble.
Autum Breeze back from the writers' block grave woot woot all rejoice
huh do you think thats how discord became a shitton of different animal parts?
Champa is the name of Universe 6's God of Destruction. Chappa, or King Chappa, competed in the 22nd World Martial Arts tournament and faced off against Young Goku - and lost of course. He was later killed by Tambourine while training students in his temple.
Excellent!! Welcome back! I'm glad to see this again. I hope your writing situation and situation in general has improved since last time. I'm eagerly awaiting more.
You could have had it where Screwball decided to change from an Earth Pony to a Tikbalang(from Philippines Mythology), and had her explain that she became a Tikbalang, and that they are Anthropomorphic Ponies who are residents of the Filly-ppines, and they mainly walk on their hind-legs, and even mentioned to Twilight, Rarity & Spike to think of them as the Equine Equivalents of Minotaurs, I'm just saying it would be a better way for Screwball to have Hands & Not need to Always float around due to her quadrupedal body.
The scootaloo looking dragon?
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Smouldering love interests, I see. I'm lovin' it!
Wish I could visit... because reasons.
Featured 1/7/19 as well.
Welcome back
Another snap and ScrewBall is a dragon again. How can she snap when she didn’t have hand back at the moment she met Ember in her pony form? Answer, she can’t it’s a writing error.
Happy face. I somehow forgot I had this in my favorites because of how long it’s been.
I shall wait for the next chapter now.
Still waiting, don’t mind me.
Utter... inhalation. Ah yes, of course. Terrified of being breathed in.
Oh my heck it's Smoulder!! :O
Also, *palette
Twas a cute chapter. Looking forward to new chapters again!
Oh no, Screwball gonna sig Ponyville with Lyra's madness!
Oh, for that matter....
i.pinimg.com/474x/ce/70/50/ce70500cd4cd9c3b15d2453c365e8a47--comic-party-mlp-comics.jpg
Annihilation.
It's Alife!
Instead of hoof hands, there is a story where Twilight gets sent to Tatarus, modled after the Greek version, and has to find her way out without dying and becomes a goddess along the way. She befriends a monster, a skin and bones, furless predatory pony like creature with arms and claws instead of wings.
reminds me of a silly story where Garble challenged Celestia to a duel, and she actually hit him with a Solar flare:
"garble ceased to be. he was an ex-Garble."
is that supposed to be "Smolder" from Season 8?
Was the guest character the dragon that looked like scootalo?
Not gonna lie, this story really just a written down imagination of self-inserting with godly powers masked by using existing character and "limitations" you created yourself. Whatever. It not that bad of an idea, just because I doing it myself sometimes in my head.
But the problem is, your story is so cringy and simply wrong, in a way it is not the story from the book writer, but rather small child imagination.
I want, I do.
I don't want to think, then I use keep it as canon as possible.
I being bored, I creating problem out of nothing.
It is not really writing a story; it's writing down what you dream about when you bored. I bet you have no idea what will be next, nor how your story will end. No villians, no hero's ready in your head, you making story up as it goes.
And frankly, this is bad idea.
Why, you'll see yourself soon.
It may be liked by others, because you doing thinks they themselves wanted to do in they dreams when they saw the show, but... For others, it will be just a hellload of cringe.
My advice: stop following show's story. Make story of your character, as at beginning of the book. Because this is, what stories all about.
Great job
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Not if screwball turns him into a cake and sends him to celestia.
Or he gets vaporized.
Is thebtechnically a displaced fic?
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https://m.In that case...
Your alive!!! yessss!!!!
Good old smolder. That was fun.