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Steel Resolve
Joined December 2011
878 followers
249
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27108
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Steel Resolve
4
127
785
Joined December 2011
878 followers
Groups
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24w, 5dShipping
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24w, 5dClopfics
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24w, 5dThe Fillyfoolers.
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24w, 5dWriting Gold
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20w, 1dThe Writer's Group
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24w, 5dSensual Fiction (SFG)
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24w, 5dOrganized Shipping (Most Common)
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24w, 5dF/F ships
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14w, 3dRarity
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24w, 5dPinkie Pie: Pinkamena Diane Pie
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24w, 3dTwilight's Library
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24w, 4dRariPie
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7w, 6dUncommon Shipping Pairs
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20w, 1dThe League of Bearded Gentleman
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24w, 3dThe Anti-Clopfiction Group
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24w, 2dHigh Quality Mature Fiction
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23w, 6dEquestria After Dark
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5w, 5hThe Flutterers
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2d, 2hThe Rogue Bronydom
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I see the lights in your boutique on late into the night sometimes. I stay up way late myself, because I don’t need a lot of sleep. And that means I get to hear you singing to yourself a lot. You sing... really beautifully, did you know that, Rarity? I love it when you sing, because you do it when you’re happy. But there are nights when you don’t sing, and I miss it... You didn’t sing last night, or the night before. I didn’t sleep very well.
Pure diamond, this chapter.
Ah clop, if you do it right, it's touching enough that the sexual content doesnt look so foul in comparison to the romantic elements.
I guess what I'm trying to say, is that this is not clop for the sake of clop, but a well crafted romantic tale that ultilises the sex aspect as a suppliement to heartfully tell of the love and relationship between the two mares.
I... think that makes sense, doesn't it?
I...
I cam here to be annoyed at your complete lack of capitalization on your title, honestly.
But this is actually a well written story, at least a better one than I expected by far. There's a point where Pinkie's talking and she mentions the lights from Rarity's boutique and it is quite surprisngly... feels-y. Good work.
Just.. Capitalize so that the title is "I Love To See You Smile", that's all I ask. Because the story is good.
Image: http://zipmeme.com/uploads/generated/g1340927486633695128.jpg
So that just happened...
Thought this was pretty good, I usually have a stronger stomach for erotic scenes but when I read
“Oh! You... you touched it. Please, don’t touch it...” she gasped feebly as the hoof lightly caressed her.Pinkie drew her hoof up to her mouth and licked it. “Mmmm, not bad. You taste sweet.” She smacked her lips and beamed at the trembling pony she’d just tasted.
I couldn't help but cringe for a moment's notice there. I must say though it is really well-written, I'm glad this wasn't "just" a clop-fic since it incorporated very feelsy kinda moments in the story. Good job! 
Of course you did. What many of the younger or less cultured bronies don't get is that pretty much all romance novels from the era of time that they were vastly popular, contained several or numerous sex scenes - because it was simply part of the story, or the story was leading itself that way.
Yet still they manage to complain about sex in a fanfiction, when thousands of celebrated books that sold well in the real world quite openly display that they are sexually oriented and are completely acceptable because that is at least somewhat expected of the genre in many cases.
You essentially made a call back to such pillars of writing in the worldwide reading community, and pointed out that Steel's work is more in line with such stories in its conception and structure. I really do hope the fools with loud mouths stay away from this one, don't you?
I agree. This is really good.
the fic Xenophillia is a lot like this, except that it is an HiE, and explores more the difference in cultures and complications with a relationship that arise from it, along with the strength of the bond of the lovers being able to overcome the problems.
Very good. I like the way you show us Pinkie's feelings in this without ever outright throwing them in our faces. Pinkie does her best to portray her actions as simply helping a friend in need, and it's only in the little things here and there that give us hints that she feels more strongly than she lets on. As a few commenters above have already mentioned, the line about watching the Boutique from her window and listening to Rarity sing was very powerful.
Hang on a minute... Do I spy an [incomplete] tag? Am I to take this to mean there is more of this beautiful Rari-Pie to come? Oh, that makes me a happy pony indeed!
Image: http://i.imgur.com/KUcxf.jpg"(...) in the chair._The hoof pressed firmly into her, and she plummeted into freefall. Every part of her convulsed as she felt a great heat wash over her, and her eyes flew open to stare into the lovely blue eyes of the smiling pink pony."
Can't... stop... 
Must... turn off... grammar-nazi switch.
And stop... talking with... so many pauses...
now THAT... that, was really good! This is how clop is supposed to be written, with heavy feels and tasteful conduct. 
Image: http://denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw2077-10838220-20101020am_I_trying_too_hard20approval20face20image20rating20reaction_face20response20sign20twilight_sparkle1.jpg
... Well, I'm a hardcore Rarijack shipper, but...
Image: http://pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw3782-779643399ac4677cfd9624cc8ff29e9c_500.pngAnd not just the clop. You, my dear friend, you may have a mustache. 
As well as a fave and an upvote.
I don't read clop. I will read this. This does not feel like a contradiction at all, and that's a good thing.
Hurrays for you and the other you which wrought wrote this also.
Pinkie Pie is best pony. Rarity is also best pony, but Pinkie Pie is best pony.
Image: http://0-media-cdn.foolz.us/ffuuka/board/a/image/1340/75/1340754795003.gif
This... this is a good story. Outside of:
Her breath caught as wave after wave of ecstasy thrummed through her body, and she was barely able to force a wail of bliss from her clenched throat
a period being forgotten at the end of this sentence (near the end of the story, 2-3 paragraphs up from the last sentence), I failed to see any flaws. But, then again, I wasn't reading for errors.
You and those who helped you did well and while I won't be following this erotic tale, I can easily say this was a good job. Thumbs for you!
Cheers
~Cosmic
These I completely agree with.
While I may enjoy tastefully written romances or smut, such as Xenophilia, The Study of Dual Female Reproduction (respectively), where the characters are in established to be in a relationship, or Tipsy, which is at least consensual, it's stories like "One Tight Knight" that are about Crystal Ponies gang raping Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie that put clopfics and such in such a bad light.
Yes, yes, happy-go-lucky me...
Instantly noticed. Listened to it the whole time I was reading this.
I came here because of the title and summary, the mature tag was a surprise honestly, but I can definitely say I am glad I read it. Also, you listed this as incomplete...
Now to mess with everyone:
Of all the terrible things, THIS IS THE WORST POSSIBLE THING!
The first third/half of it is actually pretty decent, it has the obvious 'RD and Fluttershy have sex after the jousting' thing, Pinkie Pie joins in to be there for Fluttershy and for fun (which actually seems pretty in-character, considering the rest) and makes a pretty funny joke, but then the author turns to gang-rape from all the Crystal Ponies, with their reasoning being 'it's been 1000 years, let's rape everyone'. If it had ended after Pinkie Pie joined, it would have been a pretty decent clop/comedy.
When I first saw this I was just about furious that another clop had gotten into the feature box. There are so many stories nowadays that are just clop, and aren't what I'd call stories; just 3000 words of sexual content. But you my friend, you made a well written clop with a touching element that made this story brilliant. Clops aren't always my thing unless there's feels behind it, and discoveries are made in the end; and sadly that's rarely the case...but thank you for a well written story, and I hope to see more of it soon.
And another thing that makes this story great? A uncommon shipping, and is done well. 
Image: http://fim.413chan.net/fic/src/134012129530-sweetie_belle_that_i.jpg
>>1716480 True true. I figure there are two ways to address that. You can decry the state of the feature box and bitch that the content should be removed, or you can write something beautiful, and try to set an example by it. I am hoping that I've done the latter, because I have no intention of trying the former.
Granted. As I stated in another argument somewhere amongst my hundreds of others on Fimfic, clop gets part of its bad rap from people who should keep such terrible writing in their personal fantasy-diary. I'm all for helping new authors, but there's a big difference between a new writer and a shitty writer. The new one has much to learn, and is eager to do so. The shitty writer does not care how poorly he writes, how atrocious his spelling is, or the slightest thought given to any who might read it.
In which case, he should not be sharing it but rather keeping it to himself.
The rest of the bad rep comes from the small-minded, the biased, and the moral "white-knights" (I mean this in the most sarcastic of ways, not to detract from those who do actual good in the world) who probably get off on it quietly, feel ashamed - and then violently rail against the entire genre as if to somehow absolve themselves.
I'd find their lot humorous if there weren't so many pathetic excuses of humanity who fall into such a category.
I like your style, Steel.
The people who scream about the feature box and how they didn't get into it but poorer writing did strike me as rather vain and arrogant. By my understanding, one gets into the feature box based on upvote-to-upload time ratio? Apparently, even if the writing was poorer, more people were exposed to it and/or like it.
Yet there are many who refuse to accept that and decide they should be in there simply because they did more work, without reviewing WHY they might not have gotten enough exposure or votes.
Then we have people like you, who instead of whining and moaning and forming little hate-clubs, actually get up and decide to DO something constructive that can only add to the community instead of poison it. I applaud you, good sir.
>>1716476 He does, doesn't he? He's quite... diverse. I commend you for your story as well, it doesn't really qualify to really even be classified as "sex", as it's more of a heart-to-heart conversation of frustration, and aggravation. As far as things of this nature go ( I'm sorry, but I don't really have a choice to NOT call this a clopfic), this is quite well done, and while I don't really think it deserves to be the top fic on the featured, I still say it should be there at, maybe the third slot. All in all, a nicely written fic about the bonds between two friends (*pervert snicker*, bonds), so I hereby claim it's rating to 8.7. A higher score than many of the scores I give, but not too high, right? Just look on Gameinformer magazine, they have a pretty good rating system, and I intend to use it. 8.7 is a pretty good score, and not everyone can write a fic of the same worth. Congrats!
>>1716587 An honest rating. Thank you for that. And yes, the story has flaws. I am far better with longer running fics. Establishing a new couple's dynamic within a reasonable length of words was a challenge, as was limiting the perspective. But from the comments it seems I did it.
>>1716641 I must say, he'd probably quite well writing his own erotica novel and truly publishing it. He can do better with life.
>>1716642 Thank you, I enjoy reading other's costructive criticism on my own stories (I have none here, the reason being on my user page) as well as giving it. And yes, I know how you feel when you say it's difficult establishing a relatively new coupling in a short block of text, I had a project for creative writing, and I got stuck with "establish a romance in under 8000 words". I stayed up for sixteen hours straight writing that piece of work I wasn't even too proud of... Lousy Ms. Vanlandinghum (true name).
I love that new word, "equinniquin"
and that Pinkie quote...
"I mean, at first you’re fine, but then one day you find yourself at a party with a bag of flour and a pile of rocks and they start hitting on you."
As for the story, somepony mentioned BDSM in the comments, but I guess I'll give it a try anyway. I mean, how could you turn Rarity down?
...After reading...
Nah, it wasn't that bad: not statutory rape, not particularly vulgar description, nothing illegal, nothing fetish-y. I don't enjoy Pinkie x (Anypony) clopfics, but that's just a personal preference. I'll favorite/like it for the humorous lines alone.
This was fantastic. Rarity's reaction, the mix of fear and confusion, felt entirely real. And you managed to completely justify Pinkie's behavior. I love how hard she's trying not to reveal her attraction to Rarity. I can't wait for more.
People learn and model their behaviors by, more than anything else, imitating others. That's a fact. Doesn't mean being exposed to rape in a fanfiction is going to cause anyone to go out and rape someone, but it's something worth keeping in mind.
This is one of those pieces that transcends its material. The premise was simple, believable, and honestly just plain nice. The characterization was very good, Rarity being absolutely spot on, and Pinkie was entertaining as ever, although I did get a little Hrmm moment when she licked her hoof. I would have expected her to giggle after saying something like that. Anyway, I found this sweet, and very touching, especially the ending and Pinky's line about Rarity's singing. I felt that was especially well written. The whole piece felt very genuine, and I liked the subtle undertones that this was more than a bit of friendly advise and a one friend helping out another, at least on Pinkies part. I might be reading too much into it, but I got the feeling this was less a spur of the moment thing, and more an opportunity finally presenting itself for her.
All in all, this piece joins the couple of stories I've read including clop that I actually enjoyed. Looking forward to the next chapter, and seeing the fallout. I foresee a bit of trouble in Rarities acceptance of the situation perhaps, but hopefully that's temporary.
I like clopThere, that should get your attention.
Now that that's out of the way, I thought now would be as good as any to talk about this.
Firstly: No, I didn't always like it.
Secondly: No, I don't like clop for the clop.
My Little Erotica is an incredibly interesting mental exercise for me. Sex is undeniably a huge factor in everyone's life. Denying sexuality to a character is to deny them what makes them human, er, pony.
(Un?)Fortunately MLP can't explore that in canon. Ever.
That's where clop comes in.
Clop can be an absolutely amazing way to see that extra, third dimension to the characters. Sex is when our morals, our flaws, our attributes, our raw soul itself is on display, there is no point where we are more naked to the world at large, to our partner and to ourselves.
Admittedly, I still mash the space bar a few times in a clop to skip past the heavier scenes. Sue me, I'm not a prude, but I'm not in it for the clopping. It's just a unique and un-rivalled way to get a new, definitive glimpse into the characters for me.
My name is Mr Danger Numbers and I approve of clop...
I am willing to admit this for all to see because Danger is my middle name.
Ahhhh, that was great. Completely platonic stress relief.
Gotta love friendship with benefits, eh Rarity?
Who knows though? Maybe love really will blossom from this, instead of an easy way to get off. I mean, sure, you can do it by yourself, but things get in the way... at least with someone else helping, you can just let them do all the work.
... I just turned one-way love making into something selfish. God damn it.
Overall, this is just proof that I've a lot of work to do for my own clop writing. This was very feelsy and got the blood pumping, well done. I think I achieved nearly the name with my WhoovesXRedheart writing for one of my stories, but it was really hard to get right. That, I had to get it through multiple revisions, along with not having any experience makes the whole clop writing thing an ordeal of epic proportions.
One of the better romance stories I've read in a few months. This has SO much promise. Good clop that's not gratuitous or vulgar (even if clop isn't your thing, its acceptable-ish). Plenty of emotional content, which pretty much makes his a good read.
On a formatting note, I like the way you ended the first chapter. Just enough closure to tie it together, yet enough of a cliffhanger to make the reader want more.
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