- Member Since 19th Jun, 2013
- offline last seen 5 hours ago
Vic Fontaine
Author & Editor; Chief Apprentice in Loyal's House of Fanfic; Lt. in the Army of Biscuit; Does Bad Things for Bad Horse; Runs a Nightclub on Holodeck 2.
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I can see this becoming something epic I hope this will keep going.
Very well-adapted! Glad to see the first installment of what ought to be a long-lived series.
5171509
Thank you! And yes, this will be continuing for sure! I'm not a terribly fast writer, so I can't promise a specific ETA, but new chapters will be coming - each with a new ship and scenario.
5171568
Loyal senpai approves!
That was...wow. Very vivid and very evocative.
I look forward to future installments.
5175926 Thanks!!
I'm compiling a list of future chapter ideas, and a couple are already in the planning stage, so there shall be more to come.
THE GREAT AND GLORIOUS ALL-POWERFUL MUSTARD
reallylikesthis
Ultra nice great chapter!!!!!!!
Excellent.
I thought you did a god job with the lead up in particular in this chapter (I did not read the other chapters since Pinkie is the character I am interested in reading). I thought the idea of Pinkie and Bon Bon hooking up because of their situation works for this story. As for the pairing it is certainly uncommon but I liked it. I normally read stories with Pinkie and Rainbow Dash, Twilight Sparkle, or Big Mac but this was fun though one thing I would have liked to see is more info of Pinkie trying to date others sort of like Bon Bon did (I know you did give something I just think it would have been good to mention a character we know too).
One question that I would want answered but was not was whether Bon Bon and Pinkie are an item or are they just enjoying each others company when they need it? The ending makes me think the second but I am not sure especially with how Pinkie is unattached and Bon Bon is on the rocks with Lyra.
I would not mind seeing more chapters with Pinkie in the same continuity or a different one.
5258847
Thanks for the comment, and I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! Though Fluttershy is sad that you didn't read her chapter.
(just joking)
To answer your question, Pinkie and Bon just happen to be at the right place at the right time - and have a shared need, so to speak. Now that you mention it though, they could work well together in a longer term arrangement... *files away idea for future study* :D
Thanks again!
GMP
5259040
I was also curious because if Bon Bon does not break up with Lyra then she is going to continuously be cheating on her. Granted they are on the rocks but that is still objectionable to many especially if they did not break up. Makes for an interesting story as right now then they feel good but does BB feel guilty? Does Pinkie Pie? Do they want to be together or do one or both think of it as a one time thing? Do they want a relationship or do they prefer not being attached (particularly BB since she is having a bad experience while being in a relationship rather than Pinkie who does not mention being in a relationship). There are a lot of potential questions (which is a good thing honestly).
5259252
Good points indeed, and they get right at the heart of the unstated quandaries that were a key part of the TV show that I'm basing this story on. (see link in bottom of story description).
On the TV show, the characters would disregard pretense and possible consequences and embrace the moment. For the most part, I'm sure the average viewers didn't think too far past the end of an episode, but in the end, the characters were left with questions/possibilities not unlike the ones you just mentioned. How they deal with them - if they deal with them at all - is left unsaid, but does leave the door open for further exploration.
I've got many other things on my plate at the moment, but I may just have to circle back to our two confectionery queens for an expanded story. ;)
5259334
Interestingly while the original characters would react that way in this case I think these characters would be very different. I will keep an eye out for any additional stories from this idea.
5259510
Thanks!
Nice. I'd like to see this pair revisited some day.
5346399 Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.
i60.tinypic.com/2i70o6.png
It was
resident voyeur
5403537 Hehe... Good guess, but it wasn't Ms. Bookpony.
Her turn is coming up soon though. I have something special planned for her.
A couple of thoughts on this chapter that jumped out at me:
Gotta be honest, 'the hapless D&D nerd with a crush for the ages' that he was in the comics version of their high school days is a lot more endearing than Hot Perfect Popular Captain of the Team (tm). I guess I can't really expect everyone to have read the comics though. Or necessarily consider them canon.
Sounding like a form letter is the least of his worries: the title "Ms." is historically used to refer to a woman who's been divorced or widowed and that would probably be a bit insulting to Cadence. "Miss" is more technically accurate.
Nitpicks, but sometimes it's the little things that bug you.
Pretty cute so far, if a bit simple. I basically grew up on that "Skin-emax" stuff so I'm intrigued by your idea here. Will read more after work, and probably look forward to more beyond that.
(Sparity entry about the delicious taboo of it all plz?
)
5415861 Thanks for the read and feedback. Points are duly noted, and I'll respond in more detail when I get home from work. :) Cheers!
5415861
Okay, back from work. To address your comments...
1. Ah, I have not read the comics, but the idea of Shining being a nerdy gamer type seems interesting. I'll have to check that out, lol. Though the show never gets into it, I always saw him (in-show) as the 'Team Captain' type, so I went with that here. Sorry if his portrayal here was a bit of a turn off for you though.
2. I actually didn't know that. I'll correct the 'Ms' to Miss' immediately; thanks for the heads-up.
3. Yep, the Red Shoes series was pretty simple and 'to the point', lol, so I'm trying to replicate that formula here, with perhaps a bit more setup than is absolutely necessary. ;)
4. Sparity, eh? Hmm, I'll add it to the idea hopper! Thanks for that!
5417584
It's issue #11-12, for reference, and the whole thing is basically one big amazing 80s pastiche/parody. A fantastic read, I would highly recommend it.
And hey, no need to make apologies for attempting at least some semblance of a background story to these oneoffs. I actually tend to enjoy a proper setup to the smut, it makes it more compelling and engaging in a lot of ways. Like, for example, I just got through the Rainbow/Spitfire story, and man, I would've loved to see that backstory explored at length, it sounded fascinating and would have made for a more poignant and desperate and almost bittersweet sex scene there at the end.
Buuuuut that's just me rambling about my love for porn-with-plot. I can totally get that that isn't what you're going for here.
5418099 Thanks for the comic reference, and I'm very happy to hear that you're enjoying 'Red Shoes' so far.
If you're keen on 'plot with some plot', then I'd happily recommend a few items:
Full Bloom (Rarity-Roseluck)
My other mature fic to date
Moonstone (Fleur-Luna)
I edited this one for my good friend, Loyal. (longer read; contains lightish bdsm wrapped into a love story)
Hooray, you live! And you still write very neat!
5856325 Yep, I'm still alive! :)
Just been tied up with other projects for a while. Though credit for this chapter goes to my good pal Loyal. He's our guest author at the moment. ;)
Gotta love the spa twins.
5858770 Glad you liked it! :)
5860427
I wonder who runs this. My money's on Chrysalis.
5860483 It's actually a room full of monkeys with typewriters.
;)
5860495
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f1/Monkey-typing.jpg
Waiting for the next one.
5860532 Thanks for sticking around then! :)
The next chapter is the part 2 of Lyra's little romp from Episode 5. I'm nearly done drafting it, and hope to have it done in the next week-10 days. (real life crud not withstanding, lol)
After that, I'll turn my attention to the last two of the main six who haven't been 'red shoe'd' yet - AJ and Rarity ;)
Excellent work! I'm glad you're sticking with the fic :)
5876679 Thanks!
I don't know why, but this seems like mental manipulations.
First, the stallion's name is Spell and second, this all seems to have started when she looked into his eyes.
I'm probably wrong but this seems to me that Velvet was hypnotize and the mare in the mirror is her subconscious fighting the stallion's tampering.
As for the easter-egg, I don't know what it is.
5975708
Well, I can assure you that this was not my intention. Spellbind was just a convenient name fora unicorn that also works in the publishing business, which puts him in a position to have something to talk about with Velvet. (as I type this, I realize I did not specify Spell's job. #fail)
And I've always had a thing for pretty eyes. It's what stood out to me the first time I met my wife, so it's always been a 'go-to' thing for me when working on attraction angles. ;)
5975708 Ack, I forgot to respond to part of your question. Sorry about that.
So, you're right that the voice in her head is her self-conscience, but think of it more as that voice in your head that tells you a 100 times that what you're doing/about to do is a bad idea, yet you continue anyway.
5975941 Ha!
Glad you liked the chapter. :)
Plot twist: The entire chapter is the easter egg, because Spell is the likeness of 007 and 007 always gets the girl.
Or mare in this case.
"For England, James?"
You quoted the former 006, Alec Trevelyan, with the "pithy comment" line. Nice touch.
Really enjoyed this. You captured the agony and the ecstasy of an affair very well.
5977122 "No, for me." ;)
Winner! :)
This chapter was ugly and disgusting and awful and I really wish I hadn't read it, or even found this fic again. There's something to be said for the forbidden romance angle, but fetishizing infidelity and cheating like this just pushes all the wrong buttons with me for more reasons than I can put into words. Suffice to say, it did far more to piss me off than arouse me, which is pretty frustrating when the fic has been pretty lighthearted and positive so far and I remember really enjoying the first few chapters. Now I feel all dirty. The whole thing was just.....vile.
I favorited this fic to remind myself to keep up with it this time around, but now I'm kind of regretting it.
Sorry to sound so negative, but I needed to get it out.
--CG
5979613 I don't think Grand Moff was fetishizing the affair, at least not entirely. Velvet knows she's damned in the end, she knows what she's doing is wrong...
But sometimes what's wrong can feel so right.
As a man who has had thoughts of infidelity in the past, part of the allure is the wrongness of it.
Sex can be light hearted and fun (as you yourself a quite accomplished at writing) but it's important to see the dark side from time to time.
(For real; big fan. 'Her Majesty's Secret Service' is one of my favorite stories ever.)
5979935
Like I said, the forbidden love angle has its merits, but there's a line, and this is so far past the line that we can't even see the line anymore. The line is a dot to us.
But seriously, it was just far too jarring a shift from the lighthearted, largely positive stories this fic has consisted of so far. It was gut-wrenching and cruel, and as someone who, as you pointed out, is highly invested in the Twilight's Parents ship, it bothers me that the vast majority of fics about them prominently feature infidelity.
5979613 An occasional peek into the darker side of love (such as affairs) was always part of the plan for this fic. The original TV Series that I'm 'basing' this fic on was much the same. Light-hearted sex-ships in a 40 minute episode, but it too delved into the affair and infidelity angle from time to time. [in the show, the man behind Red Shoes, a very young Dave Duchovny, is seeking answers after he caught his own wife cheating]
Anyway, I hadn't planned for Velvet to be the subject of the infidelity here, but a bit of inspiration struck and I decided to roll with it. However, I'm sorry that it pushed the wrong buttons for you and was not an enjoyable entry.
I I know I can't please everyone all the time, but I still feel bad when I let a reader down. :(
But, the good news is, the next chapter is back to the 'random clop affair' format that we've seen before - and there are Apples involved. ;) I do hope you'll stick with the fic though, and in the future, I might use the A/N to tag darker chapters up front, just so folks can skip it if they wish to up front.
Thanks again for your comment and I appreciate the readership. :)
-GMP
5979967 Shoot, that's right! You did 'Majesty's Secret Service'!
Well, now I feel doubly bad for letting a reader down. :( *hides in the corner*
5980374
Don't worry about it. Can't win 'em all.
The real difference between this and the original show, I think, is that those stories were truly anonymous; the viewer had no prior interaction with (or investment in) the characters, they were just vessels for exploring a kinky story. That's not the case with your fic, though. We know these ponies, and thus we all have certain various....expectations about them, so the stories, especially the darker ones, will have a more significant impact. And yeah, Twilight's parents are characters that I personally am more invested in than most people, so its more frustrating for me in particular when so many stories about them already involve cheating, and seeing another one here really kicked me in the teeth. Especially with the fact that there's no real resolution to give the reader closure on the problem. Even a Bad End would have probably been better than none.
I get similar reactions to Cadence/SA stories that involve breaking them up/cheating, actually. It really turns my stomach for some reason to see people take a couple explicitly shown to be in love and married, and rip them apart so they can be shipped with a more preferred character. And it's an even bigger peeve when it's with some faceless, characterless OC that I don't care about. So that probably lost you a few extra points.
I feel a little better now after having slept on it, and it's far from being the most anger-inducing fic I've ever read, but....yeah. Still wasn't a fan.
--CG
(If you really wanted to explore the darker, forbidden love angle, I'm still waiting on that Sparity 'older woman/really-young-almost TOO-young-guy taboo' idea.
)
WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO READ THIS?!
Holy FUCK, GMP. This was good. Haunting. Visceral. I'll have a longer exposition for you via e-mail later tomorrow, or this morning, but I'm honestly upset with myself for not having paid attention to this sooner.
5986573 And you should be upset!
Lol. Glad you liked it. :)