- Member Since 9th Mar, 2014
- offline last seen Jun 20th, 2018
scribe-feather
A frequent pegasus who posts infrequent stories.
scribe-feather
Joined 9th Mar, 2014 ·
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interesting.......
Quite the unorthodox ending, as I see it. She took the blue pill.
Meanwhile, in the reality Celestia left behind.
Nice
So Celestia chose to "live in her dream world"?
I dunno, instead of finding the story cute, I just find it creepy. I mean, Discord's basically influencing/manipulating Celestia to stay a permanent foal...in an Alicorn's body. And the illusion that seems to make everypony see "Tia" the Alicorn foal, not "Princess Celestia" the full-sized Alicorn who happens to be dressed like a foal just freaks me out.
Knowing Discord, I forsee something horrible happening in the other world. Maybe Princess Celestia's now in a coma.
5079622
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If you choose the red pill you leave lala land and go back to being an adult. If you choose the blue pill our story ends, but a new story of wonderment and care-free life awaits you.
So, choose.....
For the whole first half, there's not really a story. Which I know is intentional, because this is fetish material, designed to please the fetish first and be a story second. I've ragged on you for that before, and you've done a good job of defending yourself. But it's still something that nags me, especially in light of the ending.
As others have pointed out, there's a story here that we're not seeing. If Discord really wanted Celestia to be happy, he wouldn't put her through this without her consent. He has a motive, whether you intended for him to have one or not, and others have speculated that trapping Celestia here is going to help him with whatever he's planned for the real world. (It also seems out of character for Celestia to choose to abandon her duties in the end. Taking time off is one thing, not worrying about what going's to happen to the original reality is another thing altogether, and Celestia didn't become a princess by shirking responsibility. I just can't see her accepting this deal.)
I get that this was a commission, and so a lot of details may have been specified by the commissioner. But overall, while there was a lot of cute imagery, I can't say I'm a fan of the fic, if only due to the preponderance of plot holes.
An interesting ending indeed...
5081360
I'm so sorry; I posted this and went to bed without mentioning all the parts of the fic I did enjoy.
As usual, your attention to detail is excellent. I can see the nursery thanks to your details, everything feels fresh and alive. The events of the Autumn Leaves ball are pretty heartwarming. You may have written a fluff piece, but as a fluff piece, it's well done.
I particularly like the decision to have Discord appear only as a plushie. It distances Discord from this other reality and adds a small bit of an "uncanny valley" vibe to the story, contrasting with the cuteness of everything else. And it works.
Feather you need to stop making so many good stories
I can only like so many...
Eh screw it
ALL THE LIKES
This is really OOC for Celestia. Commission or not, Celestia wouldn't just 'give up' like that. I just can't see it at all. Good writing though.
5085959 Maybe Discord did something off screen to alter Celestia subconscious.
there was no mention of a pacifier coming into the picture before this....
5081026 Seconded... permanency always creeps me out with this sort of thing anyway, and this is even worse- not to mention how readily Celestia seems to give it all up, or perhaps that could be put down to Discord messing with her head.
The way it was made permanent at the end bothered me. Now all of what Celestia was is now lost. And that's not even to mention the creeping worry about how the two realities are linked and whats happening in the other one. Overall it was a great story with a really unsettling twist at the end that kinda ruined this one for me. But that's just me. I'm sure alot of bronies loved how it was made permanent.
Hmm, maybe with an excerpt at the end that stated how another Celestia from that world's parallel that wanted to return was allowed to take the role of Princess again it would be more worry free. Either that or if Discord split the personality of the foal Celestia and her dutiful side. Either would have worked. Now I'm just thinking whats happening to the REAL Equestria.
Dawwwww, cute!
5080373 In that reality, Luna is ruling with probably Cadence, Twilight, or Discord...
i liked this story alot the only thing i didnt like was the ending
5085959
Her mind was practically mush after the many months in this state of hers. She wasn't really thinking like a grown up. She thought that since this felt nice, this was the best option.
10462963
I have to say it felt more like a mind-break/horror story to me for that very reason. That said, it was a nice psychological story.
11093924
One of my favorites from Scribe, shame they won't be making anymore...