• Published 6th Jun 2014
  • 6,939 Views, 70 Comments

The Night After (Lisboa Oneshot) - KorvasTerindar



A Oneshot story for the artist Lisboa, based on one of his pictures. Twilight is thrown a birthday eve party by Pinkie Pie and her friends, resulting in some interesting antic's as the evening goes on.

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The Night After

The Night After

Spike stirred slowly in his bed, the early morning sun streaming in through the window of his room, casting a dim light that suffused. The young dragons body felt stiff and achy, as if he'd been working out for hours on end, and his eyes felt sore and itchy. It had been quite some time since he had felt this tired after crawling into bed, not since his eighteenth birthday a few months ago. He'd been given this bedroom because he'd hit a rapid growth spurt that had caused him to double in size, quickly out growing his small basket bed.

Come to think of it, he had no idea when he had crawled into bed last night, but it couldn't have been much longer than a few hours before dawn, especially with how he felt. He yawned broadly, becoming aware as he did so of the sour taste in his mouth. He tasted his tongue a little, confused as to where this could have come from. He sighed and stared blankly across the wall opposite his bed, wanting nothing more than to curl back up and go to sleep. He moved to shift his pillow, becoming aware as he did so of a strange weight that lay across his chest. Confused, Spike attempted to shift a little, feeling something tighten around him, pulling him back further into the bed, his back bumping up against something warm and soft.

A feeling of dread mixed with confused worry began to creepy over him as he slowly peeled back the blanket. The first thing he spotted that sent alarms off in his head was a violet colored hoof which was draped over him casually, the very thing, he was sure, that had pulled back on him when he had tried to get up. Hardly breathing, he tossed the covers off of himself and revealed Twilight, snuggled up against him. Spike recoiled backward, his mouth open in the attempt to scream. What in the world was Twilight doing in his bed?!

Dozens of scenarios, none of them pleasant streamed through his head at what could have possibly happened last night to land him in this predicament. The night before, Pinkie Pie had thrown a rather massive party inside the library, celebrating Twilight's birthday eve. This is what she had called it as she threw streamers and party balloons in every direction until Twilight relented and allowed the party to proceed. Pinkie's elation was evident, screaming in joy before putting on loud music that shook the windows of the house and offering both Twilight and Spike drinks.

Twilight had hesitantly accepted hers but Spike, after noticing an unusual scent to the punch, he had politely turned it down. Pinkie simply shrugged a little before downing the punch in a single gulp. It wasn't too long after Pinkie had downed her second glass of the punch that a loud knock sounded at the door. From this point on, the party really got crazy.

Pinkie Pie made a dash for the door, skidding sharply before slamming against it. With a wrench she pulled the door open and revealed a group of ponies standing in the doorway, the obvious party guests. The group consisted of Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack, and oddly enough, Maud, Pinkie's older sister.

Pinkie squealed in happiness and grabbed the entire group of ponies and spun them into the room, slamming the door shut. After that she sprinted over to the drink table and zoomed over to the stunned guests, offering each of them drinks. They all hesitantly took them, looking between each other as Pinkie ran back over to Twilight and Spike, grabbing Twilight's forehoof and shaking it wildly saying, “C'mon C'mon C'mon! Let's dance!”

Before Twilight could so much as blink, Pinkie dragged her out into the middle of the room and spun her around, beginning an energetic dance, leaving Spike to stand alone off to the side. He wasn't sure what to do while his friends danced on the dance floor, and instead settled for maintaining the chaos as best he could. A few minutes after the revelries started, all of the guests made a point to come over to him and hand him an assortment of wrapped gifts for Twilight, which Spike, staggering under them, placed on a small clear space on the refreshment table.

He sighed heavily and watched the dancing ponies, contemplating on occasion to go over and ask Rarity for a dance, but every time he made a move to do so, she'd usually be swept into another dance with somepony else. He couldn't help but feel a sense of disappointment every time this happened, finally settling after the fifth time this happened to just watching the dancers. He found that his eyes kept drifting over to Twilight and her rather sad excuse for dancing, watching as her friends gave her a wide berth to avoid injury.

He smiled as he watched her, finding her rather silly and erratic dancing cute and endearing in its own way. He continued to smile as the dancing continued on, usually watching Twilight for the duration of it all. After two full hours of dancing, all of the ponies called a halt to the dancing, though Pinkie didn't turn off the music, and each of them decided that Twilight should unwrap her gifts.

Twilight's trepidation and hesitance had long since melted away under the effects of the alcohol spiked punch, and grabbed the stack of gifts with great enthusiasm, sitting on the floor to unwrap each of them. The gifts were pretty standard, and what you'd expect from her friends, a rather extravagant knitted night gown from Fluttershy, a new dress from Rarity, a small box, with jars of Zap apple jam from Applejack, a first edition Daring Do novel from Rainbow Dash, and a collection of rock poems from Maud, which made Twilight cringe slightly, but she thanked her regardless.

Spike still had no idea why Maud had agreed to come along, but he reasoned that she didn't want to upset Pinkie, which made sense. After the gifts were opened and Twilight had thanked each of them for them, Pinkie insisted that they order dinner asking everyone in the room what they preferred. After a short deliberation from each of them, it was agreed that Spike should head to the local pizza parlor and get them all pizzas for dinner. Spike sighed heavily, heading up to Twilight's room to collect a bag of bits for the order.

As he entered into her room, he noticed that it hadn't changed much since he'd left it, books still littered the floor and her bed, which was disheveled from when she'd gotten up this morning. As he went over to her nightstand and pulled it open to retrieve the money, he noticed something that made him blush a little. It was a picture from when he and Twilight had gone to the beach earlier this summer, taken by Twilight just before they had left. She had leaned over and given him a playful kiss on the cheek which he had assumed had been for the photo, as it hadn't happened again afterward. He was surprised to see that she had framed the picture in a nice tasteful picture frame and placed it so close to her bed. He smiled, looking at it for a moment more before taking the small bag of bits and leaving the room.

After shutting the door he moved back downstairs and left the house glancing over at Twilight as he did so. As soon as he was out of the house, Pinkie pie slammed and locked the door behind him, grinning mischievously. Turning back to the revelers she said, “Guess what girls...we're gonna play Truth or Dare!” All the girls except Maud and Twilight began giggling mischievously and sat in a circle in the middle of the room while Pinkie brought over an empty cider bottle which she sat on the floor and gave a hefty spin.

It almost flew from the circle with the force she applied to it but it eventually stopped before it hit anyone, spinning around and around before coming to a halt pointing at Pinkie herself. Pinkie giggled to herself as Rarity asked, “Well Pinkie, truth or dare?” Pinkie looked thoughtful for a moment before saying, “Truth! What do you want to know?” Rarity chuckled as she asked, “Did you and Maud ever take baths together?”

Twilight could have sworn she saw a faint rosy glow on Maud's impassive face as Pinkie nodded and said, “Yep, we sure did, all the way up until I was ten!”
Twilight's jaw dropped at this rather embarrassing secret and knew why Maud may have blushed. Everyone else on the other hand started giggling and began to question Maud if it was true, which she admitted it was, stating, “Pinkie was afraid of the bathtub, every time our parents told her she had to take one herself, she'd panic and claim that she'd drown if she was alone.”

It was Pinkie's turn to blush as she said in an uncharacteristic manner, “Uh...why don't we spin the bottle again. Rarity, you asked, so you spin.”
Rarity nodded and gave the bottle a light spin with her magic before refreshing everyone’s drink. Twilight accepted her drink as the bottle landed on Applejack, who groaned as Rarity said with a smile, “Well dear, Truth or dare!”

Applejack immediately responded with, “Dare”
Rarity gave her a sly smile and said, “I dare you to let Pinkie Pie give you a make over.”
Applejack groaned audibly and muttered, “I should have said truth...”
Pinkie Meanwhile did a happy little dance and trotted over to Applejack and promptly began taking down Applejack's braid. While she did this, Applejack spun the bottle softly causing it to spin briefly before pointing over to Rarity. Applejack grinned wickedly and asked, “Alright Rarity, Truth or Dare?”

Rarity grinned and said, “Truth, After all, I don't want anyone messing with my mane, besides, the new look suits you.” Everyone became suddenly aware that Pinkie had stopped working on Applejack and returned to her place in the circle. All ponies present, with the exception of Applejack had to fight the urge to not laugh, the spiked punch they had been drinking making it incredibly difficult to do so. Applejack's mane had been done up in a style similar to Mrs. Cake from the bakery, interlaced with stripes of color including blue, purple, red, and pink, arranged in such a way that it made her mane look like a technicolor nightmare. Her face had been laden with make-up in such a thick layer that she looked far more gaudy than she did with just the hair alone.

After the silent giggles slowed Applejack asked Rarity, “Do you have a crush on Spike?”
Rarity frowned slightly and said, “No dear, I don't. He's a wonderful friend and a true gentledragon, but I don't feel that way about him.”
Many of the group frowned slightly at this and nodded which was followed by an uncomfortable silence fell on the group, minus the pounding music that still pervaded through the room. They all knew that Spike had a crush on Rarity, it had been obvious from the day he had met her. Her open admittance to not feeling that way about him made all of them glad that he was not in the house. After another uncomfortable moment, Pinkie Pie got up and returned a few moments later with the punch bowl and set it down on the floor and said, “I think we need more to drink, and this is the real stuff, no more of that weak punch."

She handed out glasses full of the stuff to each of the ponies in the circle, who clinked them together before slugging the back, everyone gasping as the apple flavored punch burned on the way down. It didn't take long after the first four shots that everyone forgot the awkward question from earlier and proceeded with their game like normal. As Applejack spun the bottle for the group the was a loud shout from outside, followed by a very loud knock come from the door.

Twilight giggled and got to her hooves teetering as she walked over to the door and unlocked it, opening to reveal a rather irate Spike standing there holding a stack of four pizza boxes on one paw, looking at Twilight with an obvious look of annoyance. He sighed heavily and asked, “Why in the name of Celestia did you lock me out of the house?”
Twilight chuckled and said, “I didn't Pinkie Pie did, come on in! The night's still young.”

She grabbed Spike and pulled him over the threshold and closed the door behind him, before trotting back over to her friends and dropping between them again. Spike sighed, the lingering smell of alcohol still in the air as he walked over to the table of refreshments and placing the boxes upon them. He helped himself to dinner as he watched from a distance as his friends continued to play their game, deciding it was better to remain the sober one among his friends as the party rolled on. He also smirked at Applejack’s new look as well, mentally intending to tease her about it when she'd sobered up the following day.

He couldn't hear what his friends were saying over the loud music, but he was happy to see Twilight having such a good time, it caused a warm glow to fill him a bit to see her happy like this. This surprised him a little, but he reasoned that was because he was her best friend and of course, any friend would enjoy seeing a friend happy. Meanwhile, among the others, the bottle had landed on Twilight for the first time, and she giggled softly and said, “Well, which one you wants to ask me a question? I don't want my hair like that.”

She indicated Applejack who held her head high in an attempt to show how unaffected she was of the hideous hairstyle while Fluttershy asked, “Well what about you Twilight? You got someone special in your life? A special somepony? Or perhaps a special somedragon?”
She giggled sweetly and blushed after asking the question the others of the group also chuckling softly at the question, Twilight however puffed out her chest and said, “I have Spike, I don't need anyone else.”

A chorus of giggles and girlish oooo's filled the area as they looked between each other while Twilight took another gulp of the strong punch, hiccuping slightly after doing so. Twilight smacked her lips and spun the bottle again, the bottle pointing at Maud this time. Maud blinked at it before looking up at the group and saying, “Truth.”
Everyone giggled again and Twilight asked, “Do you have a special somepony?”
Maud nodded and said, “Yes, his name is Rocky, he's my professor at the college, we both like rocks.”

Everyone rolled their eyes at this as Spike came over with seven plates of food balanced on his arms and head. He gave one to each of the ponies and walked off again but not before Twilight insisted on giving him a peck on the cheek as way of thanks. Spike's burning blush was obvious as he turned from the group and walked away, shaking his head at how tipsy his friends were, but smiling all the same.

As the game and evening wore on, all seven of the gathered ponies became increasingly inebriated, asking wilder and more outlandish questions with each time the bottle stopped, finally, as the bottle came to a halt for the last time before the party ended, it finally stopped on Twilight once more and she said, swaying slightly, “Oh heck, its the end of...of the party...lets go with Dare.”

Rainbow Dash giggled drunkenly and said, “I dare you to show Spike how you really feel about him, go give him a big smooch!” Twilight smiled and said, “Alright...alright I'll do it.”
Twilight got up from the floor and tottered over to Spike who was sitting on a cushion against the wall with earplugs in, reading the newest copy of his favorite comic. He hastily put the comic down and stood up, removing the ear plugs. As he opened his mouth to ask Twilight if the party was over, she forestalled him with her hoof and said, “Has anyone ever told you how handsome you are?”

Spike gave her a bewildered look and tried to speak but this time was stopped by Twilight's lips meeting his. His eyes went wide as he was eagerly kissed by his drunk friend a wide host of confused thoughts and emotions running through his head. He didn't get enough time to form any kind of clear though before Twilight broke the kiss and slid to the floor giggling softly.

He had no idea how to feel about this, all he knew was that two separate emotions were at war in his mind, a strange mix of pride and happiness, and a sense of confusion and hurt. He had never thought that even when drunk that Twilight would do something like that, but as he thought about it, he felt that in a way, he didn't mind so much that it was Twilight who had done so, it felt more special to him with how rarely she showed affection like that.

Spike stood there for a moment more before shaking his head with a faint smile and flipped off the music, to mixed groans and sighs of relief from all present. He moved away from the nearly unconscious Twilight and said, “Okay everyone, its three in the morning, the party is over now. Come on, everybody run along home now and get some sleep. You all have hangovers to greet in a few hours.”

The six other ponies groaned in protest but complied anyway, picking themselves up off the floor and staggering over to the door. Spike met them there and opened it for them, shooing them out into the night as they giggled at the drunken antics that each exhibited as they staggered down the street. Spike sighed in relief and shut the door behind him, looking over the messy room, with Twilight curled up in a ball on the floor near the cushion he had been sitting on. He shook his head and walked over to her, seeing that she was well and truly out cold, breathing peacefully in a dreamless sleep.

Spike knelt down and picked her up, carrying her over to the stairs and up to her room. After tucking her into her bed, he couldn't help but notice how sweet and innocent she was, sleeping like a baby in a cradle, gently sighing every so often as a random dream entered her mind for the briefest of moments. He remembered the kiss she'd given him and grinned a bit, touching her mane gently as he bent down to kiss her on the head gently.

He now seemed to become aware of a new sensation building up in his mind, whether from the antics of this night or perhaps from the kiss, but Spike now felt as though he was developing feelings for the purple pony beside him.

As he got up and made sure no light could enter the room, returning to the main room where the party was and beginning to clean up. As he worked, he concluded his train of thoughts regarding his curious feelings for Twilight, realizing that perhaps...they had always been there. It took him over an hour to put everything in order and after finishing with the cleaning and reorganizing, he rubbed his eyes sleepily and turned off the lights to the library, wearily trudging back upstairs to his room.

After falling on his bed he pulled his blankets over him and drifted off to sleep, exhausted. However, this was not the end of this night, only minutes after Spike had gone to sleep, Twilight had woken up, needing to relieve herself. As she left the bathroom after doing her business she looked down the hall at Spike's room and grinned. Rarity had told her to show him how she felt about him, but really, was a kiss really good enough.

She chuckled drunkenly and slowly crept down the hall, opening Spike's bedroom door and peering inside, she saw him lying asleep on his bed and grinned, forming the perfect wake up call for her dragon companion. She slowly crept over to his bed and gently lifted the blanket up, sliding into the bed next to him, wrapping her forelegs around him.

She kissed him gently on the lips and snuggled against him, but before she could do anything more, her mind shut off completely and she fell asleep mere seconds later. Spike of course did not know that this was what happened after he went to sleep, but as he concluded recalling the events of the previous evening, he decided that Twilight must have snuck into his bed shortly after he had fallen asleep. Feeling more calm, he gently shook Twilight and tried to rouse her.

It took a few moments, but eventually she stirred and slowly opened her eyes. As she did so, she promptly screwed them closed again as the morning sun hit them. After taking a few deep breaths and thanking Celestia that she couldn't get hangovers she tried opening them again and looked over at Spike who sat on the bed starring at her. She grinned widely and said, “Good Morning Loverboy, sleep well?”

All thought process immediately ceased in Spike's mind as he stared at Twilight and dumbly asked, “What?” She giggled sweetly and said, “Yes Spike dear, what do you think happened last night?” Spike worked his jaw a few times, failing to produce any form of noise at all, eventually stammering, “I..I..You...We...” She giggled and slowly slid next to him and said, “You want to check me and see if I'm telling the truth?” She slid a hoof up his arm and he squeaked meekly, at a complete loss for words, as he had absolutely no memory of doing anything of the sort.

After a moment or so he said bluntly, “But Twilight, I don't have any memory of this, I don't remember it at all.” She frowned and looked at him, confused, before saying, “But it was you who started it. I did sneak into your bed last night, but I fell asleep before I could do anything else. The next thing I knew, I was being shaken awake by you while you were...well...” She blushed very heavily, now very conscious of how exposed she was.

She pulled the blankets a bit closer to her and said, “I'll admit, I was panicking when I realized what was going on...I felt betrayed and a little afraid, I almost screamed...but...but then I heard you whispering to me, whispering my name. You told me that you loved me...and...I felt like my heart was going to explode.”
She smiled, looking at him as she continued shyly, saying, “After you said that and I heard the sincerity in your voice, I couldn't scream, I couldn't move. All I could do was stare at you, and eventually, I kissed you. It was almost like something out of a fairytale...”

She trailed of here as Spike looked at her, frowning. He had to admit, he did care about Twilight, a lot more than he had ever had in his entire life, more so than even Rarity. His feelings for her had only grown stronger as he had become aware of the fact that he and Rarity was likely never to be, but he had only in recent times become aware of just how much. In the end though, he guessed that his dreams had revealed his true feelings but he was still confused as to how he could have made love to Twilight while being completely unaware of it.

He smiled a little and gently kissed Twilight, before saying, “Oh Twilight, I do love you. I've never really noticed how much I did until recently, but I can't deny it, I do love you. More so now than ever before...I only have one question.”
She smiled at him, her eyes sparkling in the light of the early morning as she asked, “What is it Spikey-Wikey?”
He chuckled at this use of Rarity's nickname for him and asked, “Is it possible that I made love to you in my sleep?”

Twilight looked blankly back at him, mentally thinking through all the books she'd read and the symptoms that she'd be looking for. After another moment or two she laughed and said, “You know what, I think you did do 'it' while you were asleep, its been known to happen.”
Spike laughed weakly as well and rubbed the back of his head. After another moment or two he asked, “Well...You think we could...you know...do it again? When we are both more aware?”

Twilight smiled and kissed him again before saying, “Of course we can after all, anything for my knight in shinning armor, but not right now, right now, I'd like to get something to eat. Mind cooking breakfast for me?”

Spike smiled and slid of his bed, bowing in an exaggerated way towards her before saying, “Anything for you my dear, I'll even serve it to you in bed.” With that he left the room and headed downstairs to the kitchen, leaving Twilight alone in the room. After his footsteps had faded away she got up and stretched broadly, aware of the rather unpleasant feeling all over her body.

After shaking her limbs experimentally she walked over towards the bathroom and mused quietly to herself, “I wonder when I should tell him I was in heat...” With a slight giggle she slipped into the bathroom, looking forward to the day ahead of her.

Comments ( 69 )

Ohhh.... What a night!

Comment posted by Author of MADness deleted Jun 6th, 2014

Read this on deviantart. Really great read!
:twilightsmile::heart::moustache:

great read Pacing was good
characters were good
spelling and grammar great

rating 9/10
Prize
Tiger 2 tank
i3.photobucket.com/albums/y60/drewinvancouver/Art%20and%20Illustration/5189cb0a.jpg
feel the power!

4503607 cool, a King Tiger tank, I've always wanted one!:yay: Glad you enjoyed it :twilightsheepish:

4503730 no, I must thank you for the great story, mate. enjoy the tank. just don't start a war with it mate.

Good story, enjoyed reading it and all the drunken shenanigans the mane six plus Maude got up to were hilarious

Two problems I had were 1: spacing or walls of text. If you double tap enter when you start a new paragraph then there's that bit of white between the blocks of black lines. Just makes reading it easier to follow, at least for me it does. After re reading the later bits I realized that you started to correct it before you even finished the stoey

2: the jumps at the end. You were doing so well Twi the pacing and then it's Twi with "I'm gonna sleep with him" straight into " You bucked me in your sleep" then jumping to " I might be pregnant now" You can't just drop a bomb like that on your readers.

Two little nit picks in an overall excellent story just keep them in mind for the future.

4503811 Hey, I appreciate Nitpicks, thanks for those :twilightsmile: I'm glad you liked it.

4503760 I won't, I'll just go on a joyride with it :trollestia:

4503837 well here you go then! [ tosses a set of keys]
those are to the tank and for the gunnery range have fun!

Really good story. Spilight :moustache::heart::twilightsheepish: is > Sparity :moustache::heart::raritywink: Also, love that bit at the end, made me laugh a little.

Why do you writers keep making one-shots like this that just screams, "SEQUEL".:trollestia:

"The Month After"

:twilightsheepish:"Spike!"
:moustache:" Yes, Twilight."
:twilightblush:"I'm pregnant!"
:moustache:"..."
:twilightblush:"..."
:moustache:"BOOM"
:twilightblush:

4504113 Who says I won't make a sequel? :rainbowwild: There's nothing saying I can't hehehehe :twilightsmile:

Not a fan of shipping, but the lack of a mature rating give me hope.:twilightsmile:

4504310 I know all to well that you don't need mature or erotic material to write a good story, this was aimed to be crude humor only. :twilightsmile: I hope you liked it, though judging by the smiley, I think you did.

4504349
Not yet finished, but the concept, plus the fact it's not mature rated and the lack of an anthro tag means I shall aid you.

4504189 Oh, really:ajsmug:! In that case, I hope you do. :moustache::twilightsmile:

4504113 :trollestia: Momlestia will now have 3 sons....

Perfect as always, loved the humor of this one!:twilightsmile:

any chance of a sequel? :twilightsheepish:

4504654

Where in the hell did Celestia have three sons??? :applejackconfused: I can see Spike as her son, and in some strange way, I would not be surprised that at some point Blueblood is actually Celestia's biological son rather than her nephew (to keep it a secret), but I have to see how in the hell would Celly have a third??

...hell, while you're at it, you could say say that Cadence is her biological daughter....

4505548 That is the joke man... Spike is the adapted son, a sun and now a grandson, or maybe...

Do I see a sequel in the future?

4505598

:facehoof::facehoof:

I'm ashamed....I've seen that one before, I just thought it would be coming from a different direction. My bad.:derpytongue2:

Good story :moustache:

in heat? uh oh, that automatically calls for a sequel where she breaks the news to spike!

SEQUEL NOW....................please

Wow... lots of effort was put towards this. Good Read!!!:twilightsmile:

4507378 Hehehehehe I am glad to see everyone enjoying themselves with this. Sure, I'll make a sequel to this. :twilightsmile:

and a of rock poems from Maud, which Twilight cringe slightly
The nights still young
Spike sighed in relieve
snuffling every so often

1. And a book if rock poems from Maud, which Twilight cringed at slightly.
2. Night's.
3. Relief.
4. Shuffling.

Whelp, that ended on a bomb. A very pleasant bomb. Least Spike can now properly fulfill the role of the care taking mother right? Assuming this Twilight also doesn't know how to cook that is:twilightoops:

4508177 thanks for the corrections, I'll implement them as soon as I am able. Glad you liked it.

Twilight passes out while trying to jump Spike HA HA HA! Thank you for the laughs. Good short.

Twilight, you sly minx.

Oh, I cant wait to read this later.

This needed a prereader. The formatting and syntax are wayyy off.

4510513 I had two people preread this...

my major problems with this is that twilight seems too impulsive, and while she may be in heat that doesn't mean "herp derp irresponsibility and super horny powers activate" and i found that twilight not having a hangover (which isnt really explained) to be a very convinient excuse to give the dialouge some level of normalcy for the sake of the plot, i for one would love to see twilight stumble through the motions of seducing spike/ banging him in a painful hangover. also I find it weird that spike is perfectly fine with being in a sexual relation with someone who has been the non biological equivalent of his big sister his whole life, not very believeable, but i guess for the sake of the ship... also one more little nitpick that really is more of an observation

“Of course we can after all, anything for my knight in shinning armor, but not right now, right now, I'd like to get something to eat. Mind cooking breakfast for me?”

“Of course we can after all, anything for my knight in shinning armor

knight in shinning armor

in shinning armor

gross

4510710 the shinning armor reference was not intended to reference her brother, though in hindsight I can see how that would be a problem. As for the sibling like relation, I do not believe such a relationship actually exists, which is one of the reason he adapted so quickly, In my mind, their relationship has always been closer to that of best friends/co-workers, my main points to this effect is that Twilight does not treat him like a sibling in many regards and I call her interactions with cadence and Shining Armor as prime examples of this. Spike tends to treat Twilight more like a mentor and best friend over anything else in my opinion.
As for Twilight's impulsiveness, she's hammered, how many drunks do you know who can remain in perfect control of themselves, also, as I pointed out, she sobered up a little bit while she was sleeping and panicked when she realized what was happening to her.
I won't deny however, that her like of hangover was for narrative reasons.

this was posted two days ago and already has 1.5k views???? da fuq?:rainbowderp:

Good read. The ending screams sequel though :pinkiehappy:

and a of rock poems from Maud, which Twilight cringe slightly, but she thanked her regardless.

and a collection of rock poems from Maud, which made Twilight cringe slightly, but she thanked her regardless.
_____________________________

Rarity nodded and gave the bottle a light spin with he magic before refreshing everyone’s drink.

her

and how did she refresh their drinks? Rarity is good at manipulation magics, but not so good at teleporting [that's Twilight's signature spell]. Confused at that bit.
______________________________

Rarity nodded and gave the bottle a light spin with he magic before refreshing everyone’s drink. Twilight accepted her drink as the bottle landed on Applejack, who groaned as Rainbow Dash exclaimed,

Rarity
____________________________________

Applejack immediately responded with, “Dare” Rainbow gave her a sly smile and said, “I dare you to let Pinkie Pie give you a make over.”

Rarity
[seriously it was her turn.]
_______________________________

Fluttershy giggled softly and said, “Alright Rarity, Truth or Dare?”

Rarity grinned and said, “Truth, after all, I don't want what happened to Applejack to happen to me.”

Bucking hell.

1) It was Rarity's spin when it landed on Apple Jack.
2) It would've been AJ who asked Rarity not Fluttershy. Since Fluttershy was nowhere in this game yet.

This entire game sequence is messed up. Good, nice little stuff. But please for the love of all things holy and unholy fix it. I want to read this fic I do, but when you switch characters, alter in the drop of a dime who's doing what, and have dialog [after the Pinkie Pie one] that makes no sense it makes it hard to actually care about the fic.

If you fix it, please PM me. I'd like to read this fic someday when it's not so filled with errors, and please keep track of who is doing what one sentence to the next. And I'm sorry if this comes across as a bit dkish, but after it became Rarity's turn to spin [after Pinkie Pie's turn] things went down hill and I don't want to spend the next hour obsessively combing through a potentially good oneshot. I want to be able to enjoy reading it instead.

4511411 I have never played truth or dare so I had the girls ask at random regardless of who spun, so basically there was no turn order, the drinks are on the table across the room, rarity just floated the cups to the punch bowl and refilled them. I will make the corrections, but that was my reasoning for it.

There are a few in this otherwise very readable fic, but your biggest error is not making a new paragraph each time some pony different speaks.

4512013

Well here's how the turn order of Truth or Dare goes.

1) A person/pony is asked Truth or Dare.

2) That person/pony does said thing. Then its there turn to either Spin the Bottle as they were doing to pick who gets picked next [not the askee, or the person who went last], or is picked at random.

3) That one gets asked Truth or Dare.

4) Wash, rinse, repeat.
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Truth or Dare Rules.

Please fix. Because peeps who know the rules, you have a person / pony whose implicitly told it's there turn. Then you switch who does what. Then you start randomly throwing ponies into who says / does what. Its just jarring and confusing.

I mean "Rainbow Dash's" dare would've been perfect for AJ. And a few quick edits you could make it not only right, but IC.

WhooHoo! Fixed Truth or Dare game.

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, “Yes, his name is Rocky, he my professor at the college, we both like rocks.”

he's
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That ending almost screams sequel. When he finds out he sleep rutted her while she was in heat. Now he's going to have adorable dracony babies. That'd be something that'd freak out her friends / family. But'd make a good fic. I have to say after the re-write of the Truth or Dare game, it was an adorable fic. Nicely done, and I seriously hope this gets a sequel someday. If not, it was still a nice little fic.

4513227 :pinkiehappy: yay! I'm glad you like it. Thanks for pointing out the issues, thanks to everyone for that I am already coming up with a sequel for this story. I have a general idea in mind for it :twilightsheepish:

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