first comment ! love your work, been reading this on ff.net

Sweet, now I can read this here instead of on FFnet.

And the circle is complete. I'd argue that Pinkie deserves a tag as well for this story; she's played a pretty big role as well, bigger than the other Mane Six save for the rightfully-tagged Twilight.

Now! Time to reread each chapter and comment on each like I swore I would if it was posted here!

I must be honest. I hate nobles. I hate princes, princesses, kings, queens, dukes, duchesses, I hate them all.

Most of them are egocentric, stupid, moronic fools more concerned with themselves and their lineage rather than any form of duty.

I can name very few nobles who give a crap about ponyville, and it's a short list.

Good to see the fic cycled up and online! I'm still new to FIMfiction, obviously, but with the responses of a few helpful people here I've solved the formatting (indentation) issue and everything should be running smoothly. Heh. It's very nice to be here. This community is to active, it's amazing to me, since I'm used to FFN.

>>388751388751

Pinkie does deserve a tag, I suppose. Alright. Sadly, with so much focus on Rarity and her duel with Antimony, there hasn't been time to focus much on the other mane six. You could say: what we need is for all six of them to get into duels of their own, eh?

>>388816388816

Aristos do seem to have a pretty bad wrap, don't they? But then, I've noticed similar levels of hate for elected officials, too. Quite a few in both cases deserve the vitriol.

People aren't going to abandon FFN entirely, are they? I guess it makes a useful backup archive for fics if nothing else. I've been in FFN for so long, it is kind of hard to expand to other, newer sites. It tends to require vigorous prodding.

>>388849388849

There's no shame in focusing on what truly matters to the story. The conflict between Rarity and Antimony should be front and centre, and indeed, that is the reason Pinkie deserved her tag; she is the road to Antimony's salvation, if there is salvation to be had... and a chance for it, given the inevitable calling of à outrance in the duel.

Originally read this on Fanfiction.net, it's an excellent sequel to the "Best Night Ever" fic.  The changes to Blueblood's personality really effect how he acts and Rarity is learning just complicated being nobility can be.  The situations of both Pinkie and Twilight are also interesting, Pinkie torn between old and new friends, Twilight between her friends and her family.  The duel is also awesome, showing how magic can make innocuous things like cupcakes dangerous as well as demonstrating how talented and clever Rarity is.

so I  stayed up all night reading this on fanfiction.net. you are an INCREDIBLE author. also very erudite and knowledgeable, its always refreshing to  read something where its clear the author has "done his research" so to say. I love " worldbuilding" fics like this where we  get to know an entire society and how it functions. keep it up.  More please!

I-de-a ! Terre Rare .. Rarity .. ?

Why has R.a.r.i.t.y been renamed Sparkler?

Did I miss something?

Oooo... I get it now. Happy April fools day, everybody

or

Happy April foals day, everypony!

Um... You're calling Rarity 'Sparkler'...

Edit: What the-? Even though I typed R a r i t y, it keeps coming out as Sparkler. What the heck?!

Edit 2: Whoops, it's April Foal's Day. XD This is freaky.

Protip for April Foals' Day: If you enter an empty tag in the middle of a word, the parser can't see it as what it is trying to match. For example, Rarity.

Well I'll probably follow this on both FiMfic and FF.net

Not quite sure which one I'll review on though. Probably both. Just because. I'll try not to just copy + paste my review on both pages or something like that.

See you around, then.

oh...em...gee...Antimony has the mangekyou sharingan

Hell yeah Rarity, you kicked some ass!

And now poor Rares has to defend herself against every unattached Terre Rare unicorn mare in the kingdom. Oh well, at least she started with the scariest one.

SPOILERS AHEAD: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!

WOOT! She WON! But now she'll have to deal with the rest of the Terre Rare family. At least she'll have the Prince with her.

just finished reading it. Was 'life is study' a Gekiranger refrance?

I felt like I was going to have a heart attack, the tension was so palpable. It's not even slightly clear to me what phase of the story we are at now - whether this duel was the climax or one scene of an ongoing epic. Of course, my favorite thing was Rarity's remembrance of seeing colt Blueblood. Fabulous.

Also, "From this point on, you will be the pony everypony wants to lay low." Best cornball line of the year.

Twilight's comments about Canterlot's secrets are interesting in light of the episode "It's about time.". When talking to Rarity in this story, Twilight acts like she isn't one of the ponies entrusted with those secrets.  But in the episode, Twilight casually knows the whereabouts of Tartarus and instantly recognized its guardian.  More impressively, when she goes to the locked archives where dangerous time magics are stored, the guards instantly open the way.  I see three possibilities for what that might mean for your story:

1. Twilight has access to a few secrets because of being Celestia's apprentice, but not the really juicy stuff guarded by the old unicorn families.

2. Celestia would deny Twilight nothing, and any secret she wishes to know is theoretically open to her, but in typical oblivious Twi fashion she doesn't notice that all doors are open for Celestia's student.  Celestia would in fact teach Twilight anything Twi asked, but hasn't volunteered some stuff Twi doesn't ask about.

3. Twilight Sparkle was just being modest and not mentioning all the forbidden lore she knows.

I kind of favor number 2, because I find it hilarious how Celestia always treats Twilight like her heir and Twi is too adorably dense to notice.

BTW, it occurs to me that Rarity could short-circuit all these duel challenges by marrying Bmueblood right away.  Present them with a fait accompli that they can't undo.

"There is nothing for you here, Rarity.  No sun to brighten your day, no moon to guide you through the night.  There are no friends to lean on, to make up for your many weaknesses.  No loving family for undeserved support.  It is just you, and I.  And you will never defeat me.  I have felled far greater mares than you, seamstress, mares with powers you can't even begin to understand.  Accept your new life, Rarity.  I have won, and you have lost.  I am the sole victor of this contest.  There is no hope for you here, adrift and alone in my domain."

"I am never alone!"

/cue cheesy anime music.

Also, Antimony's comments about empty cups struck me as very profound.  Did you come up with that yourself?

Hehe, if this was an anime Rarity would have handled Antimony something like this. Still plenty epic as written.

One ending is just another beginning, right?

Now that Blueblood is with her and she has more than a sparse week to prepare for what is ahead I think Rarity will become quite competent indeed. Since she is a Lady she won't really have to bother with her business anymore either, which would free up quite a bit of time.

As for Blueblood himself...well he seems pretty important for a glorified master of lines on a map as your last fic had painted him. One interesting thing I noticed is that Blueblood is Celestia and Luna's nephew as well as a direct the apparent descendent of Princess Platinum. But then, couldn't Antimony be considered the niece of the princesses as well? Antimony's family branched off too recently in generational standards for the Bluebloods to marry into the Princess's line...or perhaps they did so after the split in a manner similar to Shining Armor and Cadence?

Noble lineage promotes headaches.

And here I thought this would be the end, not merely the end of the beginning.

It's nice that this battle did not have to end à outrance; I thought it had to, what with Chekov's gun hanging there almost the entire story, but since this was not the end, it wasn't necessary. I do fear terribly when that gun does go off, though; I just can't fathom what forcing Rarity to kill or be killed would do to her.

I'm also glad that I was right in that Pinkie is Antimony's salvation, a friend who will not take "no, I will not be your friend" for an answer. Cranky Doodle Donkey has nothing on the challenge that Antimony will present the pink party pony, but I think Pinkie is up to the challenge!

I look forward to the tribulations ahead; strangely, though it might seem that the worse challenge is over, as Antimony had defeated all other challengers and was theoretically the strongest, it remains that Rarity's magic of friendship, and Antimony's complete inability to understand it, was what won the day here. If the other mares vying for the Platinum Crown actually have some friends, Rarity's in trouble.

>>399951399951

I think it's number 2 as well, but less because of Twilight being Celestia's heir apparent and more because, in this world, continuing from the final Gala loop, we have seen just the faintest hint of Twilestia...

A NEW CHALLENGER !

Itachi's Tsukuyomi and it's 72 hours have got nothing on Antimony's 2 weeks

very nice wrap-up, looking forward to the next chapter

>>400152400152 cheesy anime music?

Perhaps you mean this?

Teleport Spam Twilight Sparkle is best pony.

Now that I have finished reading the last 6 chapters my mind is blown. So much of this, particularly the duel, kept me at the edge of my seat. So intense. I feel a little exhausted after reading this. Looking back, I am quite pleased with the time I spent reading this and look forward to more.

>>399828399828

Well, there's still the torc and Blueblood's secret society thing to deal with, at least.

Brilliant. truly brilliant. Favoutied, and tracking.

Just one thing, though.

Ponies. Are not. Things!

And this is my one, and only reason that I get incredibly angry when I read this.

The reason I hate nobles? The reason I hate these nobles?

They have forgotten their duty.

I admit, I had a few misgivings about this story. Now that I've had a chance to read through the current chapter, I'm extremely happy to see my misgivings were, well, misplaced.

I'll be interested to see where the story goes from here. To be honest, minus that last scene, the most recent chapter felt like an ending.

Krizak sent me over, as I was informed this was one of the best Rarity vs. snooty noblepony rumbles ever ... and Krizak was so, so right. This entire chapter is a tour de force, adrenaline-soaked and with the perfect pace and tension. In particular, I loved the scene where the gathered ponies start yelling Rarity's name--that was lovely.

I'm so glad to see this story here. It's easily one of the best stories I've ever read over the Internet, and it's great to be able to track it on the same site as most of the other stories I'm following right now. Keep up the incredible work!

I like this story a lot.  The conclusion of the duel works in a way which I was not expecting, the world building makes sense and the character interactions are both interesting and in character.  However, I still had trouble finishing it and I think it was because the Equestria you describe is the least pleasant of the nonDystopian versions I have read.  Compare to Order from Chaos in which Equestria is described as a communist monarchy, or Night's Favoured Child, where Empress Nightmare Moon rules, the Prime Minister is not a noble and entry to the Imperial Schools can only be won through merit.  I can't even see nobles getting away with this sort of thing in the history sections of Silent Ponyville 3.

When I first started watching My Little Pony Friendship is Magic I thought that Equestria had roughly mid 19th century technology.  With season 2 showing coal powered trains, a hydroelectric dam and a black and white film reel I revised this to early 20th, and assumed that their social models would roughly match those of the United Kingdom.  This story shows that I should have been using.. I'm not sure... Germany?  The Holy Roman Empire?  as a model instead.

An excellent extension on to the prior.  Much approval- it's quite an adventure, and the pastry dueling is very innovative.

Kudos on this story.  

>>420671420671

It is actually funny you note this. I also pegged Equestria as 19th century; I really should have known better. In the last episode, after all, Pinkie and Twilight mentioned "lasers" so - yeah, it's a crazy cartoon, and the tech is "whatever it wants to be." It's admittedly thrown me for a bit of a loop the last few episodes, though it is amusing how many scenes (like Pinkie's loony toons bit) end up in an episode 2 weeks later. But, but but... Equestria in this fic draws from a few sources (UK, Ancien Régime France, Austria-Hungary), though it is obviously much more stable and peaceful than those countries. It is very much supposed to be anachronistic to us, the modern franchised First World reader.

"Least pleasant but not-dystopian" is fine as a description I suppose. For most ponies (various characters have different views on it) their government structures are non-transparent and only democratic on a local level (town councils and mayors) but also functional in the sense that things been that way for generations and no pony has much desire to change them. Ironically, with no warfare and no capacity for crushing taxation, and a benevolent (if trolly) monarchy that never dies, the common and merchant classes could be seen as having a less worrisome life than the aristocrats, who are both growing increasingly marginalized and impoverished (like Fleur's family) or who are set into personal competition with one another. A succession dispute, like Lady Arsenic's, could have resulted in open warfare on Earth. In Equestria, it is largely handled behind the scenes and bloodlessly, though the repercussions are the root of this story. Anyway, it is whatever the narrative wants it to be.

>>415113415113

I wrote this as a potential stopping point in the story, to decide later whether to continue or not. If it feels like a potential ending, that's good. It was exactly what I was aiming for. Though it would be a shame to stop here. There's so much left in the outlined story: the mane six and Antimony's former enemies gunning for them, the torc and the Terre Rare plot and Celestia's master plan... etc.

>>398730398730

Life is Study isn't much of a reference to anything, really, though I did think of "Golden Boy" when I wrote it. Now that could be an interesting story. A studious unicorn making her way across Equestria... studystudystudystudy... (her mentor would have to be molestia for Twilight to really take Kentaro's part in stride)

>>399951399951

(2) is pretty much on the nose. In Chapter Zero, there's a direct allusion to Twilight being given access to restricted spellworks and forbidden knowledge. If she wants it. She really is kind of oblivious, and hell, probably would be so worked up over learning new stuff she'd gloss over how potentially dangerous it is.

>>400229400229

I hope it wasn't too cheesy. I'd always planned for the duel to end as it did, but I'll admit I was anxious after I wrote it as to whether the Friendship Ex Machina would work out.

>>401259401259

Pinkie says it in her smile song. She just wants to make friends and make others smile. Things worked put basically just as the pink one wanted. All part of her master plan to doubt. Her plan being "unpredictability is a plan, right?"

>>407258407258

The ones we're seeing are also just a small sample of a larger population that mostly keeps itself working behind scenes and spectacle. They're all bureaucrats really. The big, glaring opening presented by Family Blueblood's vulnerability has just attracted more than a few nutters, Antimony and her clan included, though that was business long brewing.

Ah, I'm sure to run out of room in this comment box soon. Better end it here. Thanks again, everyone, for reading and commenting! Sorry I couldn't fit a response for everyone in here. I do very much need to contemplate which projects to devote my energy to as time goes on.

>>401259401259 I agree sort of about the Chekhov's Gun nature of the a outrance, but rather I felt like it made for a rather masterful red herring instead without ever needing to go off at all. Because one would think it's going to devolve into that, it just made the tension of the fight all that much more intense. I loved it :D

Nice to see you're continuing this!  It's interesting to see you weaving in an alternate version of season 2 plots, like the dragon migration.  Everyone seems pretty in-character.

DUN Dun DUUUUUUN

You misspelled Spitfire as Spitefire, and dessert as desert.

I hate how that's the first thing I notice.

Rarity certainly has her hooves full, now that she has a place in the Stable of Lords.  I'm very interested to know how she'll finance her Barony.  Maybe expel a few Diamond Dogs from the gem encrusted hills and start up a mining operation?  I'm sure it is within her right as their liege lady.  I can't think of any other unique natural resources Ponyville has available to it, unless you count apples.

I very much enjoyed the scene with the Italian Stallion, Germoglio Bianco!  Gaudy armour is not something Lady Rarity appreciates.  Gaudy dresses, on the other hoof...

I do hope to see Rarity take advantage of her practical skills and relatively pedestrian bearing when dealing with other nobles.  It makes her look unprepared and weak, and I think she knows by now that having your foes underestimate you is a powerful tool.

The legalese at the start was a nice touch.

WARNING! A NEW CHALLENGER APPROACHES!

Everytime I see a new ponified place name that is actually clever, I have a little thrill in my heart, and I'm glad to say that Reinice gave me that thrill. (I'm also curious just which languages Twilight Sparkle knows, and how many.)

This was nice, a nice lull in the action to focus on more intellectual troubles and trials, leading into another alternate-universe episode, and finally... the new threat. Time for Rainbow Dash to break out her headband; Rarity needs some pegasus fighting practice, stat.

>>476758476758

Ah, excellent. Thanks for catching that! I don't know how these things slip under the rug like this. Obvious little mistakes that get overlooked. So vexing!

Rarity never particularly wanted to be in a position of rulership like she is, but with a rather excellent and her other friends she's well on her way to developing her own way of doing things. Ponyville's financial situation (and by extension, Rarity's) is a serious problem, though, as we saw from the town relying on Applejack's rodeo prize money. She may well have to get creative with it to keep Ponyville out of debt. I do like your idea with the DDs, though. This being a Rarity-centric story (despite all the mane cast being in the fire in this half of the story) and myself being a DD fan (just like WoP) I did plan to have a little something there, in time.

Also glad you liked Germoglio! There's gonna be a lot of foreign ponies in this story soon from every corner of Equestria.

>>476918476918

Ah, how many languages does that magical bookworm know? It's entirely my fanon, but I'd guess quite a few since this version of Equestria has about a dozen languages in it across as many Duchies. Then again, even in the show, there's Fancy French!

A new challenger approaches? Oh yes. About a half dozen do, actually! Hahaha!

>>476705476705

Funny enough, the dragon migration stuff was not in my initial outline. I revised to add it in when I saw the episode. That's the thing about writing a fanfic with a season in progress; you need to keep on your toes!

"Pinkie, I'm pretty sure Ponyville already parties well above the national average" - Yeah, that seems pretty likely.

How many languages does Twi know? Probably all of them, heh.

I think the season two finale is going to provide a lot of good material since your fic deals so much with pony nobility.

My current theory; being an alicorn is a highly recessive pony trait with great potential power, so any pony born an alicorn automatically gets the title "Princess".  Best to keep them onside, you know?

Like Briefvoice, I think you'll be able to mine the season finale for all its worth. An Italian-sounding alicorn "princess" (somepony named MiAmore Cadenza certainly would fit right in in your world), who foalsat for Twilight Sparkle's family (they must be pretty important nobleponies to have a princess babysitter)? Royal weddings being big to-dos? These things could have been ripped from your pages already, and instead you'll get to reverse engineer them.

I honestly don't know all that much about feudal society or medieval times, but I like your feudal Equestria a lot, complex thought it may be. It seems rather unfair that the pegasi would ask the town to give them more water for their cloud homes, unless they have to pay some sort of levy in lieu of property tax. Otherwise, they receive all sorts of benefits without contributing to the local tax base, due to their DIY houses which require no real estate ownership. Bunch of freeloaders! Given that there are probably a lot of citizens who would take advantage of a leader who was more generous than savvy, I expect Rarity's oversight of Ponyville to go, well, not smoothly.

I was surprised at the Italian mercenaries showing up, and I look forward to learning what their homeland is like. Apparently, this story is going places I never expected when I first began reading, and there will be many more obstacles between Rarity and that platinum crown.

So now I suppose we have a challenger for Rainbow Dash? Might be interesting, even if RD isn't the one who has to take her down.

With the Migration sub-plot added, we finally know the time-frame this altered timeline is set within. I certainly hope you manage to work in the season finale, as I was honestly impressed by those two episodes. Even if you don't, all the super-mares that come to challenge Rarity will be fun to watch.

In Antimony, we saw what a powerful unicorn could do. With Ritter, we will see what a pegasus can do. Will you include an Earth Pony next?

What is the fate of that ancient set of armor you had talked about earlier? Will that villain at the bottom of a river come about? So many questions, and every chapter only seems to add more. Love it.

BUT SHE PINKIE PIE PROMISED~!

OMAIGAWSH~! MOAR FASTER! MOAR MOAR MOAR

I started this story about a week ago after noting it over at Flight of the Alicorn, and have just now got caught up. And it seems at a great point too now that we are effectively starting the next chapter in this grand old tale. I have found this story to be immensely enjoyable for a number of reasons (and I gave you your 80th thumbs up as a well deserved result). The world building has been absolutely top notch, and you have clearly put a great deal of thought into the feudal nature of Equestria and the world in general. This has had some of the most entertaining politics I have read, and comes across as quite believable in its own right.

Antimony was a superb antagonist in my opinion. Extremely well thought out, and with very convincing motivations for her actions. It was very entertaining to try and see why she did the things she did, and to what purpose. I could just about see the gears in her head move, and see how she operated.

The buildup and tension for the duel was excellent, and I was at the edge of my seat throughout to see how it went. I really had little to no idea how Rarity was going to pull it off and every twist and turn on the battle played with my emotions. Bravo!

I’m curious if you did active research for this story or not? It would seem you are well versed in medieval politics, society, and culture. I’m have to wonder what you have read to prepare yourself for writing this fanfic. I could use some good summer reading, and I think it would do me some good to learn a bit more about the influences for this story.

--------

As for this chapter, seems Rarity is hitting the cold hard reality of being a noble, and she is learning it has a lot more to it outside of her trashy romance novels. Time will tell if she is equipped to deal with the responsibilities now on her shoulders. Just the issue of trying to come up with a good gifting for Ponyville could really get her into trouble. Given she wants to make everyone happy with very limited resources. Life seems to like to either give Rarity nothing but choosing between bad choices, or having to choose between a number of good options.

I am curious about what Rarity’s powers, resources, and responsibilities exactly are as Baroness of Ponyville? At least in the past I believe it was implied that the Mayor, as the duly elected representative of the town, and beholden directly to the Princess’s, was the one who largely in charge of running the town and local area (no doubt along with some other local officials supporting her). So has Rarity been placed above Mayor Mare as the overall official of Ponyville, and the Mayor is now beholden to Rarity and is now in a awkward position between having to do what Rarity wants and what the pony’s of Ponyville elect her to do?

What resources does Rarity now have available? Rarity is no longer legally allowed to earn an income as a dressmaker (unless she wants to throw away everything she fought Antimony so hard for), and she personally has no lands or source of income we have seen yet that would normally come with inheriting a noble title considering she got her title solely as a result of “services rendered to the crowns.” It seems from the start she is doomed to go the route of the indebted and impoverished noble right out the gate based purely on her own resources (not counting her sugar daddy in Blueblood at this point). At least from what we have seen considering the fact she needed Blueblood’s money to pay for the mercenaries to protect Ponyville. It is possible she now controls at least some of the taxes of Ponyville, though that has not been explicitly stated as of yet.

If you plan on covering these topics in story then feel free to say so. It just seems that you have put a lot of thought and energy into this world, and I just love to learn more about it. Especially when it pertains to the story. Either way I look forward to your next chapter.

Also it seems we are going to run the gauntlet of my two favorite types of villains. A villain with perfectly understandable and relateable villain with the likes of Antimony, and a complete monster in our new opponent, Ritter. It looks like we might get some awesome Rainbow Dash action in the coming chapters. I certainly hope at least some of the other Mane Six get some action in. Especially as things get even more serious. I have a feeling Antimony was the nicest and most reasonable of Blueblood’s would be suitors (wrap your head around that everypony).

Big update this weekend (and Friday!) Time also to answer some of my awesome reviewers!

>>479591479591

Funny you mention the whole Princess thing, because I've wavered back and forth on just where the title "Princess" is applied in TPC (and TBNE). Cadence kind of threw this for a loop, so out of story, I dropped a few references to "foreign Princesses" in case I needed to explain it away. As it is, I'll have to add her to the rather broad family tree of Celestia and Luna. The Terre Rares, remember, are just one slipping from the Blueblood line, which has married into dozens of families across Equestria over the last 1000+ years. I'd say Cadence (from a Cavallo/Italian family) indeed won the genetic lottery and has been upgraded from distant-relation to niece. Remember, even Blueblood is really just as distantly related to Celestia as Antimony! But... then Antimony reflected on her belief that there were forbidden spells to "make one into an alicorn" as well...

>>481971481971

Always a pleasure, ponydora. The pegasi do indeed pay a vertical property tax, but their special needs re: the water supply are a special consideration. Still, I imagine pegasi do pay to permanently occupy airspace over a town, especially premium airspace. RD also has a big-ass house of her own, with all those rainbow waterfalls. Her water bill must be huge! But I also wanted her concerns for her fellow Ponyville pegasi and their community to be valid. Rarity is definitely going to face a bit of a problem, as a generous politician can easily put herself (and her town) deep in the red. The annoying thing is having to compromise what can be done with what needs to be done, and how to afford it. Rarity will have to get creative!

>>485059485059

I hope (and plan) to include the new season two finale, and to use as much of season two's stuff as possible on the way!

Lady Yumi (introduced in chapter 11) will be the only earth pony mare in the battle for the crown, and yes, she will showcase the fact that earth ponies can rumble in the top tiers. For that matter, expect all the mane six to get into things, too. Rarity had to physically face Antimony alone. How the Gang of Six can strut their stuff.

As for the other questions... wait and see. I keep referencing certain things for a reason.

>>541409541409

Thank for the review, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story here on FIMfiction!

I'm especially glad to hear people enjoyed Antimony's character, since OCs can be a handful. She's gone for now, but Rarity still has her dress for the Art Festival. I'm sure she'll be back for it. As for the background, most of the research I do is for specific terms and terminology. I go by high medieval and renaissance stuff I've picked up over the years. I can't quite remember if any specific part came from any one source.

The second half of your comment raises some very interesting questions which I'm happy to try and answer! Most all of this is, or will be, revealed in the story, but usually only in passing. I don't consider any of this a spoiler.

Since accepting the Barony of Ponyville, you can say that Rarity has a power that supersedes that of the elected Mayor (and her staff). This is largely because it is much easier to replace a Mayor at any given election than to petition for the removal of a Baron/Earl. Doubly so since Rarity is in close with both her Duke, Blueblood (who wouldn't remove her on a whim) and the Princess Herself (the absolute head of state). In practice, though, Rarity's powers are actually subordinate to that of the elected government: she can not pass laws or sign them into law (the town council and Mayor do this), and while she can lawfully swear in judges, she has no other input in their decision-making. The town really runs smoothly without her interference!

Her primary responsibilities are security of the town and the roads and the enforcement of laws, along with the protection and advocacy of trade outside Ponyville. If the Apple Family tries to sell apples in another town, Rarity-as-Baroness is supposed to make sure they aren't cheated at the border or at the market. This part of the job actually plays to her strengths: her charisma, personality, refinement, etc. The problem is the "security" issue, which Yumi takes advantage of in chapter 11. Rarity thinks of herself rightly as much happier negotiating a deal around a table and a cup of tea than raising and paying guards to discourage brigands or other criminals.

Lastly, her money: she does have a source of income aside from Blueblood. She has the right to tax ponies and property in her realm (Ponyville and the surrounding farms), along with the right to raise a tax on sales and transactions. Unfortunately for her, Ponyville is not nearly as huge and rich as Antimony's dominion in Prance (Mareseilles). The money situation for her is a real problem! Especially with all the good she wants to do for the town, she could well end up ruining herself in the process!

2 updates?

Image: http://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/2012/2/18/0d872881-347c-4ec3-9960-bf68d9052726.jpg

Interesting alternate ending to the dragon migration. And Twilight the researcher is as funny as ever.

Hmn, I wonder what Twilight might be up to.

"Rarity's dragon costume was clearly not designed for mobility, much to thed be yelling NEERD  growing annoyance and impatience of the team’s only pegasus" What happened here?

Also, you left in an Author's Note. Needs more proofreading!

>>543561543561

Research, of course! What else would she be up to?

Man, it's been 145,000 words and we're only now getting to the titular Crown?! How long is this thing going to be?

(On a related note, the Table of Contents needs updating.)

>>543633543633

My guess is that it will be as long as it needs to be. Personally I'm in no hurry to see this finish off too quickly. I'm having waaaaaay to much fun reading this.

>>543575543575

Good catch! In that case, the upload from googledocs->fimfiction assimilated a comment to the document. So frustrating when things like that slip past me! Thank you again for catching it so I can make the correction, ASAP!

I'll deal with the table of contents in a bit.

As for

>>543835543835

And how long the story will be?

We're all much, much closer to the end than the beginning. Antimony's defeat was always intended to be a rough structural and numerical mid-point for the story.

Several comments:

[The unicorn's cutie mark appeared to be a golden cage with a black bird inside] --> I wonder what Fluttershy (and other ponies) think this cutie mark means.  I could be taken rather ominously.  Maybe it's considered offensive to speculate on someone's mark if they don't choose to talk about it.

[Having touched the forbidden beyond, having felt starlight burn her skin, Chalice could not see the constellations overhead without an involuntary shiver of dread.] --> How very ominous!  The outer gods been giving her trouble?  Noticed the references to a pony villain called Star Caller.

["I couldn't help but overhear some of what happened before, but sociologically, where you attacking that phoenix family as part of a territorial display or as an extension of the initiation rite] - Oh Twilight, never change!  Hah.

It was a pretty interesting alternate ending to Dragon Quest, allowing Spike to develop in a way that I suppose the actual show can't.  Though it would still be nice to hear from an adult dragon.

I really liked the conversation between Blueblood and Luna.  In fact, it would be fair to say that I'm sorry we haven't seen more of Blueblood in Platinum Crown.  He became a very interesting character in the previous story, and I like that he's still a bit of a weasel is certain useful ways.  Mostly though, it makes me uncomfortable to have him be the object of these contests without being around himself to comment on them in some way.

I also like that Celestia treats Blueblood with the respect of leveling with him, even though it makes him angry in the short run.  In the long run, their friendship will be stronger because exposed herself like that.  A very FiM friendship lesson!

The references to Cadance are a little unnerving in light of the S2 finale.  I have to wonder just when she was replaced.  Seems like it couldn't have been too much before the wedding.  But man, it'll be interesting to see how a secret invasion by shapeshifting monsters comes off in your slightly altered continuity, assuming your story goes that far.  (Does seem like it could be a corker of a climax given all the focus on weddings and such.)  Also hoping for a Shining Armor appearance, as he is best-knight.

>>544148544148

No, the Gala was the best night.

So the Platinum Crown is an actual object, and an object with mystical importance no less.  Intriguing.  I guiess the Elements of Harmony aren't the only ancient artifacts around.  I wonder if Twilight knows anything about it.

Yumi is an intriguing character.  (Though apparently she doesn't know the Everfree Forest is a mandated nature preserve,  They don't have it around because they like looking at it!)  I like the way that her challenge falls just short enough of seriously annoying the non-noble population that she can get away with it.

Applejack was pretty in character with how she talked herself into that fight and into putting up her beloved hat.  (I like how Big Mac saw it all coming but couldn't stop it.)  I will say that I think she could have done much better against Shigure if she hadn't made the tactical mistake of going to apple bucking as her martial art of choice.  We'd seen many times in the series that Applejack is an incredible shot with a lasso, being able to bring down a speeding pegasus and make the rope move like it was alive.  It's really her main skill for wrangling mobile creatures.  Iron Temple Style might be great for ignoring hard kicks, but if Applejack hogtied Shigure up in a rope cocoon then an immobilization would probably count as a win.  Ah well, she settled on applebucking without much time to think about it and might not have had a rope on her anyway.  But in a rematch...

It doesn't come up much in the show, but it seems like Rarity is in excellent shape.  On the rare occasions that physical violence is called for, we've seen her pull off some very elegant moves.  (Like in the mass changeling skirmish in the S2 finale, for instance.)

I should not like Ritter as much as I do.  Her craziness is entertaining, and I don't see how this ends without her and Rainbow Dash squaring off in aerial combat.

["What about Twilight?" Rarity asked in return, smiling mysteriously. She then trotted past to continue across the bridge.]  -->  Oh-ho, how intriguing.  Blueblood did advise not to let Yumi see it coming...

I think you left it off on a very nice cliffhanger.  I'm going to be looking forward to seeing how these fights play out.  I doubt Mercury will beat Shigure.  (He's not main chracter enough to take out their best fighter!)  Pinkie Pie seems to be an improvised weapon user when she fights.  She'll pull it whatever is to hoof, whether it be muffins or her party cannon or grabbing Twilight and using her like a laser gun.  I bet you have a lot of fun with her fight, as she pulls in he scenery.

As for Applejack's new fight...  Lasso, AJ, lasso!  Her applebucking is too used to trees that don't move, but her lasso can yank ponies around like they're foals.

I think the name Polgara might be what Twilight is up to "

The Best Night Ever took an episode and kept it the same, hacked at it and turned around what happened behind the the scenes, and used the Groundhog Day idea to pull it all together beautifully.  

That said, chapters within larger stories that present commentary  on episodes aren't particularly interesting unless they are so painstakingly crafted.  If we're obsessed enough to read fanfics, we've at least seen all the episodes (or you should assume we have).  So is Spike's deliberation over breaking the egg really a big enough part of this story in a way sufficiently different from the episode that the event merits a full elaboration instead of one or two lines as a reminder?  That could go for a number of other paragraphs in these recount-the-episode style of chapters.  

I remember now you said something about trimming stuff from The Best Night Ever.  It ended up a masterpiece.  I can see parts of this story improving a lot with some trimming too.  

Oh, and a less serious 2 bits:

-Did you ever consider putting in a header to split this up into a Part I / Part II?  It seemed a little anticlimactic when I was reading it before I started to think of the story as two parts.  Or something else to serve as a clear transition: "It's never that simple, is it?"  Antimony's speech doesn't have quite that effect since we've heard her talking so much just before.  

-The Table of Contents summaries are a bit spoiler-y.  Though they're good for going back and finding particular scenes.  *shrugs*

/facepalm

It seems Equestria doesn't have noble houses, but rather noble asylums.

Either I've watched too much anime and I'm reading way too deep into this story or you've watched too much and have essentially finished the antimony arc and are now on the interlude waiting for the battle for the crown.  Please tell me I'm wrong.  If ponies start yelling out attacks I'm leaving.

>>544148544148

Right on the nose all around. I'm sure if the CMCs had seen Chalice's cutie mark, they might have asked about it, but to do so is a little rude. Especially for a timid little thing like Fluttershy. In Chalice's case, her CM also has some relevance to the other things brought up in your comment.

As for Blueblood, he's mostly supporting Rarity behind the scenes. That may change as things get more out of control. He's clearly not content to patiently and confidently let plans play out, like Celestia is. More on that as things heat up.

I am hoping to use Cadence and Shining Armor as TPC reaches its end. They present some interesting new options for the story.

>>547021547021

You're right - I am being somewhat indulgent with this fic. Believe it or not, I have trimmed a bunch already from TPC, but I know full well that I'm pampering myself, especially with all the worldbuilding. The ToC... yeah, I guess it is spoilery. But the main purpose is ease of navigation for readers who have gone through it before and are looking for a certain scene or whathaveyou. A Arc 1/Arc 2 division is a good idea, though. Maybe to add to the chapter headers?

>>547974547974

The contest for the crown does seem to have brought out a disproportionate number of nutters. Chalk it up to the most powerful mares also being the crazier ones.

>>561726561726

That's mostly the Neighponese thing, because, well, they are Japanese! So there's some anime influences there. I can say, though, that they don't call out attacks, though they do have fancy names for their fighting styles/moves to help readers get an idea of how they fight. (Piercing Current, for example, should give you an idea of what the fighting style involves: electricity!) Yumi and her crew are really only the tip. She's one would-be contender, the first since Antimony. Ritter is another. And then three more coming up soon. Since each one is thematically different, it also colors the chapters they 'star' in.

>>563487563487

A certain purple sorceress (student of the Princess, no less) comes to mind. I think this quote sums it up: [She] had a mind like a clock, and like that clock it regularly went "cuckoo".

Also, planning to woo the Prince under the banner of fertility... The lady's not being particularly subtle, eh? Of course, this makes me even more worried for Prince Ranm- I mean, Blueblood. Hopefully, Rarity will not have to defend her beloved's- well, not innocence, they appear past that point- honour from any forceful approach. Not that she would need to, he's fairly competent now.

Lastly, If Shining Armor and Cadence's wedding'll happen in a similar fashion to what went down in the series, the two colts'll have a great personal experience to share and bond over!

"Some crazy and/or evil monstrous mare intent on controlling me tried to force me to marry her so she could gain power over Canterlot."

"I know that feel, bro. I know that feel."

The ToC summaries are helpful.  Maybe a spoiler warning?  Since they're right at the beginning.  

Nothing against worldbuilding- I love your Castle Roc, your geography, and your new faraway lands, even your OCs.  You do it really well.  The castle party scene for a moment seemed close to the edge of forced, but then turned out great because of the development of storyline, characters, and relationships.  The middle of chapter 10 with all the dragons' dialogue went on too long, and didn't have enough development in it to really make it fit.  Just smth to think about.  Your writing is good enough that you can use more of these larger-scale organization things- you can totally go off on all the tangents you want if you just set them aside and mark them as side stories, or say they're optional.  

On another note:

How long does it take you to plan and write 500 words?  Half an hour?  It takes me a really long time, so that's discouraging me from writing fics myself.  =\  I'm not really a writer type, normally.  Mind if I message you about that sort of thing?  

Great story so far. Will continue reading it soon.

This was the music I imagined in my head when Rarity summoned the magic of frendship. Tatakai no Hate - Yu Yu Hakusho OST

I agree with Rarity. It is definitely on, now!

I'm really interested in your take of the Equestrian aristocracy, steeped in tradition and privilege. It's very different from how I'd envision things, but that merely makes it more fun to read about. And you put such a huge amount of detail into the story, whether it's describing Blueblood's jousting tourney or Rarity working on her fashion. Very nice!

Oh, Spike... Rarity and Blueblood both are going to be so mad at you when - and it's when, not if - they find out about that.

Also, kudos to you for Antimony! She's an intriguing character, and her family's background is very interesting.

Antimony has many, many admirable traits, but she really, really isn't a nice pony.

Leave it to Pinkie to subvert the ancient and honorable customs of a magic duel, and Rarity to stand up to her friend!

Ritter seems like all around bad news, but damn if she isn't entertaining!

i really like the worldbuilding going on in this story; it gives a lovely, expanded feel to whole of Equestria.

"They may have looked delicious, but they were not for eating: each one contained a mild contact sedative."

Pinkie sees what you did there, Pinkie sees forever.

The Free Company of the Dove and Cross...exactly what cross is this referring to?

I was going to comment on this story when I finish it, but after reading first three chapters I cannot hold emotions any longer!

I'm awed by the amount of detail you put into setting for this story. High society traditions, domestication of nature, history... The quality of writing is also fantastic, which makes this fic one of the best I've ever seen. Keep up amazing work!

I like where this is going.

Also, Wheel of Time reference? Love it!

"Fanciful hairless sky pixies". HA!

Every unicorn just happens to be related to Kevin Bacon? Double HA!

This is enjoyable. I do believe I shall continue.

Gods alive, Pinkie! I love you so... Crazy bitch...

"My wings are so pretty. Don't you think so? Nephew?"  - I hate you for this. Damned Pinklestia... Also, WTF?

"She had faced an enraged green dragon in his own lair." - Incorrect. Rarity faced a red dragon, the one Fluttershy drove off. Only Twilight, Spike, and Owloysius encountered the green.

Onto the next chapter!

I freaking love this story, man. And it's not just the booze saying that.

Normally I'd comment on SB, but since it's wonky right now...

Loved the fight and how AJ figured out how to go from Farmin' to Kickin' Flank

Oh man...

Pinkie Pie's fight was comic gold! GOLD, I tell you! I was constantly spluttering, coughing, and laughing during the whole thing.

And then she got her very own giant hamster ball.

Applejack's fight and epiphany were pretty dang awesome, as well. Forget bullet-time, I want me some applebuckin'-time!

One of the best things, though, was how you handled Rarity's battle. Something I love to do is take an underappreciated skill, like a utility power, and imagine interesting new ways to apply it. It's surprisingly easy to come up with ways to use that skill that are downright brokenly powerful. Someone can teleport themselves and others against their will? Why not teleport them into the stratosphere and let Gravity do the dirty work, or splinch them into the ground by a few meters? What you did with Rarity's measuring tape...that's the kind of genius that I can appreciate. Why just give a character new powers, when you can find epic applications for the ones they already have?

And next chapter we finally get to deal with Ritterkreuz...I hope Dash doesn't get worfed too badly.

Mighty fine new cover art, by the way. It's good to have you back.

Well Rainbow's battle had better be 20% cooler :P  Twilight.. well we know she has the power to curb stomp any Unicorn, but if the Neghponiess retainers are any indication he opponent will likely seem to be winning by interrupting Twi's magic only to push her to "ignition" and get annihilated. I did love how Rarity won her fight as well, taking non-combat objects and using them to win.  And poor sucker who "fought" Pinkie he never stood a chance did he?

THIS! is one of those stories that you just have to read enjoy and sit back laughing while Pinkie does what she does best, having fun! I loved this chapter and this universe.

And the awesomeness continues to pile up!  Also, I added the new cover art to the tvtropes page.  Hope someone can add a better caption to the pic than me.

I'm ashamed I forgot to comment the last chapter (looks like somebody didn't really like Dragon Quest, huh?) so I'll double up and say this was sooo aweshum

Another excellent update. And the new cover art is fantastic.

Pinkie's fight was everything I was hoping for. It was nice to see AJ figure out a style of her own after she fared so poorly last time, hopefully she will get a chance to earn her hat back from Antlers in the next go round. And Rarity's badass seamstress style continues to be awesome.

A Sea Of... made using the grass? That sounds bad.

Ritterkreuz needs an asskicking and I hope Dashie gets to supply it next chapter.

I have but one complaint about this story: You've not written enough of it! But that will change, with time.

Hat...

I was worried for a while that AJ would be the only one to not win. Even it out with 2 to 1 victories, or something.

And yeah. That sounds like how Ditzy would descibe Dash.

I'm still waiting for the Element of Magic, the strongest Unicorn in the world, and personal student of the God-Princess to actually mix it up. Your 'combat' scenes are both imaginative and well written, but I still want to see what an aggressively minded Twilight can do. I wonder what the scale is, and just how much she'd put even Antimony to shame. Though... obviously, it's not all about raw power.

Good to see Rarity isn't a lightweight. Sure it was brought out in her duel with Antimony, but I never did take her for a scrub unicorn. She seemed to have impressive control and more than a little bit of power, even if it wasn't Usra Minor or dam reconstruction level.

Applejack; on her way to becoming a master of nouka-ken

I feel bad for Evening Squall. He tried to fight the worst possible opponent, with the exception of Twilight Sparkle (who I'm certain learned a thing or two about barriers from her studies, nevermind her brother who's the king of shield spells).

You can't use tricks and traps and the like against Pinkie. She practices judo with reality. No, the best way to beat Pinkie is very likely doing exactly that: Walk up to her and bodily pound her into the ground, mercilessly. And I feel bad for saying that because I really like Pinkie and wouldn't want to see her harmed, but- still. Sheer physical violence'll be your best bet. Her own (admittedly fictional) reconstruction of how Mulia overpowered her would corroborate that.

And once again I feel like somepony should cue in Entry of the Gladiators and have an announcer go:" Welcome, fillies and gentlecolts, to the Equestria's Craziest Noblemare pageant!". No need for clowns, there's enough to go around; and Celestia sitting in the VIP box, face-in-hoofs from all the ridiculous foolishness her little aristocrats engage in.

And Blueblood in the tiger cage. To keep him safe.

Another wonderful chapter. I'm not trying to pass up the others, but the way you write Pinkie is simply fantastic!

All too often I'm disappointed by people's characterizations of Pinkie. I can't really pinpoint why either... Anyway, awesome chapter. I'm looking forward to the next one.

I am so very glad I favorited this, so that I could catch the new chapter as soon as it came out.

More brilliant work. The way you manage to turn the rough outlines of magic and suggestion in FiM, into a fully fledged and dynamic combat system never ceases to amaze me.

Love this story. Thanks for portraying Rarity as she deserves. Also thanks for opening my eyes to see how this pairing could actually work. Thumbs up.

This was a fantastic chapter! So many entertaining things here. The Pinkie fight was hilarious. I wondered how you would handle the party pony in a fight, and it did not disappoint. It was also good to see Applejack advance as a fighter, and I am hoping this is just the beginning of Applejack becoming more capable in a fight. I also loved seeing Rarity being able to take care of herself. Her self-defense style absolutely fits her, and I hope will make for more great actions scenes. Three different fight, and they were all immensely entertaining. One of the best overall action scenes I have read for any fanfic. Bravo!

Also a cool new cover art. I liked the old one, but I am not disappointed by the new one.

Thanks for answering my questions about your world earlier (I didn’t have time to respond earlier due to moving). That information really helped to put some of the stuff that is going into context. I really like the world building you have done with the FIM world.

Now time to look forward to Rainbow Dash’s fight. I can only imagine what type of stops our prismatic mare of coolness and awesome will pull out!

It got real anime/Japanese in here real quick.  I greatly enjoyed the chapter, but I cringed when rarity named one of her techniques.  I can understand the Neighponies doing so, obsessed with honor and tradition and all that, but I think Rarity would be smart enough to realize the tactical disadvantage saying what you are about to do in battle is.

Unless that Bombazine Barracade was just a sarcastic taunt pointing out just that.

You wrote some sick fight scenes, dawg.

Fantastic job weaving a Canterlot steeped in intrigue and corruption.