Fluttershy is tasked with finding breezies lost in Equestria. With the help of her friends, she sets out to see if any breezies could possibly survive in the harsh world on their own.
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 23rd Oct, 2012
- offline last seen 11 hours ago
AlwaysDressesInStyle
No way of knowing, where we'll be going, our adventures never end.
AlwaysDressesInStyle
Joined 23rd Oct, 2012 ·
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A nice story. Everyone is in character, it's original and well-written, but there's a major flaw.
This really shouldn't be a one shot. The pacing here is absolutely horrendous. It could easily be a multi-part story. You've got all these short little scenes, that when stuck together form a story, and you do it in like 5,000 words, when it needs at least 8,000. Everything goes way too fast.
Slow down the pacing, and you've got yourself a neat little story about Breezies.
4052584
Thank you! And I 100% agree about the pacing - I wrote this for the EqD WTG so I had both a word limit and a time limit.
I think a revision is in order...
"Featured Stories tagged 'Breezies'":
#1: Summer Breeze
> "Ratings disabled".
What.
9386779
Not sure where you're seeing that, but I'm pretty sure this was never featured. At the time this was released there was no option to disable the ratings, and it accrued 16 likes & 1 dislike before such time as I could disable them. According to the statistics tab, Fimfiction ranks it:
Rating: 67,354th
9387629
It was in the #1 spot of the "Featured Stories"-section for the Breezies-tag here yesterday. I don't know if you temporarily turned ratings on and off again or something of the sort, but it's gone now, so it clearly was a bug.
9388035
I think that changes intentionally. I'm not sure if changes every time you log in or every time you click it, but yesterday that tag brought up Daring Do and the Tiny Tornado as #1 for me and today it has To be a Breezie. That said, I don't think a story with ratings disabled should trigger that, so it had to be a glitch. Maybe the 'disable' option stopped working for a bit? I don't know.
But no, I didn't re-enable the ratings until after you posted, and I only did that so I could see what the rating was (16 to 1 isn't bad, but it isn't exactly featured material) so I could respond to you. I immediately disabled it again. Just a personal preference on my part.
9388285
...That's what I meant. It probably was a bug it was showing up under featured, and it was fixed when you re-enabled and then disabled it again.
I liked this. It feels like it coulda been the draft for an actual episode.
Ya know, minus the part where Dash got comedically stabbed. Twice. Funny as it was.
9894086
Thank you!
How have I never seen this before, this was hilarious.
10011183
Thank you! I'm glad you liked it!
10012904
Thanks for responding and I am glad I stumbled across it. Even if the part where Rainbow got stabbed got kinda dark.