I think you are spot-on with Spike's personality, including his intelligence and skills. Too often, he gets played for laughs simply because he's younger than the others, but Spike is a dragon, and a very well-educated one too. Being innocent is not the same as being foolish.
Also spot-on about Celestia's reaction to the news.
Omg, when I read the part about twilight writing to fluttershy, my jaw dropped. I read that story and the one previous to this one, but I didn't know you wrote them both! pure awesomeness.
You don't need to apologize, it gets the mood across, also you only need to apologize when it does nothing for the story except expand it's word count.
I wonder what will happen when this reality Twilight meets the other one. Even as the other Twilight is the least changed, the difference between the two is enormous. Will they somehow be able to compromise, could she persuade her that it's not their Discord? As she became one with Order she must be at least thinking rationally enough ( even though she hates Discord personally) to attempt diplomacy of some sort. After all, he isn't the one that did those things, and on a personal note i find it somewhat unlikely that the alternate Twilight didn't beyond a shadow of the doubt confirm he was their Discord after all. The reaction of the rest of the Mane six is the part i am quite looking forward to reading as well. And of course, just can't wait to see how will Discord react upon seeing the 'original' Fluttershy. Mind is a hard thing to break, but even harder to glue together. As always, great writing, hope for an update soon.
As she became one with Order she must be at least thinking rationally enough ( even though she hates Discord personally) to attempt diplomacy of some sort. After all, he isn't the one that did those things, and on a personal note i find it somewhat unlikely that the alternate Twilight didn't beyond a shadow of the doubt confirm he was their Discord after all.
Order Twilight is quite rational, but what she wants is totally incompatible with what the Mane 6 from the core universe want, so diplomacy really isn't possible. She knows he's not the same Discord as the one from her universe (or at least, strongly suspects it) and she doesn't care. She's not motivated by revenge. She *is*, in part, motivated by a strong revulsion toward Discord that is comprised of what his cognate did to her world plus her bond to Order, but that isn't why she's torturing him; that's why she can morally justify torturing him, but her actual reason for doing it is that the alternate Discord, and then his death, actually did a lot of damage to her world, and she wants to use this Discord to fix it. It's irrelevant that he wasn't the one who did the damage, because she believes that any and all Chaos avatars would necessarily be evil, and that evil beings can ethically be sacrificed for the benefit of the majority, who are good. She's been giving convicted criminals to Pinkie Pie to murder so Pinkie won't target "good" ponies. She doesn't have a moral problem with torturing an avatar of Chaos who really did show up and disrupt things in Canterlot and Manehattan for a couple of days, if the goal to be accomplished is a "good" one, and what she's trying to do with him is to find a way to use magic to undo entropy. Entropy, often confused with chaos, is the tendency toward disorder that leads to decay, and it's directly responsible for aging and death; she believes her experiments with Discord may lead her to a triumphant breakthrough that may allow all ponies to be immortal. Also, she wants to use him as a tool to protect Equestria, given that the year of chaos that the other one caused left Equestria in such bad shape.
I wouldn't actually call her the least changed. In some ways she is the second most changed, after Pinkie. Fluttercruel despises herself for what she's become, and Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash would all deny that they've actually changed at all (though they can easily point out the ways the others changed), but both Twilight and Pinkie have completely lost their original internal moral compass. Alternate Pinkie is essentially the Joker, except what if the Joker was a serial killer whose public face was of a likeable, fun person, not a guy who's just terrifying all the time. And Order Twilight has become so rigidly judgemental that she is willing to cause worse harm to her enemies than they ever caused to her because they are "evil" and she is "good" and she seeks to accomplish something for the benefit of all Equestria so the ends justify the means.
Our Mane 6 retain their moral compass, recognize that torture is evil and wrong no matter why you do it or who you do it to, and want to rescue Discord because he's suffering. Order Twilight wants to use him, and what she wants to use him for necessitates torturing him. They can't compromise here.
As for confirming whether or not Discord is "their" Discord or not... up until now, Order Twilight didn't care. There was no reason to believe that any version of Discord could call on anyone for help, and because his guilt or innocence isn't relevant as long as he's Discord, she doesn't honestly care whether he is the other one resurrected or a completely different one. So she didn't bother to confirm her suspicions because they weren't actually relevant. Now that she has evidence that Discord has just attempted to call someone for help, *now* it's going to be relevant.
I may be writing Spike a bit too smart and grown-up. I like a smart Spike, he's been raised by a genius who trained him in research, documentation and library science. Deal with it.
So then I take it that you not only hate Spike at Your Service, but have made it noncanon to your stories?
4576467 Uggh. Even worse than the bumbling general incompetence, they made him fail at COOKING! When they've already established in numerous episodes that he's a great cook and prepares pretty much all of Twilight's meals.
So yyou write Discord to be left handed clawed? Interesting~....
Also, I finally hunkered down and start this story. (I've been meaning to read it for a long time.) So far, the alluded graphic content isn't unnerving me or making me uncomfortable like I was afraid it might. So I think I'll be fine
I'm going to work through it, but I must apologise for being a slow reader. It might be a while before I leave another comment. I am sorry about that.
I'm not the only one with a massive smile on their face, as well as having tears trying to escape their eyes, right? It's just such great writing and emotion that I can't help but smile, but for the same reason I almost start crying. At the same time. This, and the original story with the letter, is absolutely phenomenal. Well done, just, well done.
Yeah I don't think you need to apologize for repeating several portions of the letter. Having Spike and Twilight read them and react was necessary and really well done. I can't stop now for sure.
I think you are spot-on with Spike's personality, including his intelligence and skills. Too often, he gets played for laughs simply because he's younger than the others, but Spike is a dragon, and a very well-educated one too. Being innocent is not the same as being foolish.
Also spot-on about Celestia's reaction to the news.
My God...those feels...
Yes! Shit's going down! I'm so hype for the next chapter!
Damn right. Always down for a good rescue mission.
Omg, when I read the part about twilight writing to fluttershy, my jaw dropped. I read that story and the one previous to this one, but I didn't know you wrote them both! pure awesomeness.
Powerful.
You don't need to apologize, it gets the mood across, also you only need to apologize when it does nothing for the story except expand it's word count.
I know this most likely will not end well, but I hope to God you give a happy ending or at lest bring them all back alive.
I wonder what will happen when this reality Twilight meets the other one. Even as the other Twilight is the least changed, the difference between the two is enormous. Will they somehow be able to compromise, could she persuade her that it's not their Discord?
As she became one with Order she must be at least thinking rationally enough ( even though she hates Discord personally) to attempt diplomacy of some sort.
After all, he isn't the one that did those things, and on a personal note i find it somewhat unlikely that the alternate Twilight didn't beyond a shadow of the doubt confirm he was their Discord after all.
The reaction of the rest of the Mane six is the part i am quite looking forward to reading as well.
And of course, just can't wait to see how will Discord react upon seeing the 'original' Fluttershy. Mind is a hard thing to break, but even harder to glue together.
As always, great writing, hope for an update soon.
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Order Twilight is quite rational, but what she wants is totally incompatible with what the Mane 6 from the core universe want, so diplomacy really isn't possible. She knows he's not the same Discord as the one from her universe (or at least, strongly suspects it) and she doesn't care. She's not motivated by revenge. She *is*, in part, motivated by a strong revulsion toward Discord that is comprised of what his cognate did to her world plus her bond to Order, but that isn't why she's torturing him; that's why she can morally justify torturing him, but her actual reason for doing it is that the alternate Discord, and then his death, actually did a lot of damage to her world, and she wants to use this Discord to fix it. It's irrelevant that he wasn't the one who did the damage, because she believes that any and all Chaos avatars would necessarily be evil, and that evil beings can ethically be sacrificed for the benefit of the majority, who are good. She's been giving convicted criminals to Pinkie Pie to murder so Pinkie won't target "good" ponies. She doesn't have a moral problem with torturing an avatar of Chaos who really did show up and disrupt things in Canterlot and Manehattan for a couple of days, if the goal to be accomplished is a "good" one, and what she's trying to do with him is to find a way to use magic to undo entropy. Entropy, often confused with chaos, is the tendency toward disorder that leads to decay, and it's directly responsible for aging and death; she believes her experiments with Discord may lead her to a triumphant breakthrough that may allow all ponies to be immortal. Also, she wants to use him as a tool to protect Equestria, given that the year of chaos that the other one caused left Equestria in such bad shape.
I wouldn't actually call her the least changed. In some ways she is the second most changed, after Pinkie. Fluttercruel despises herself for what she's become, and Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash would all deny that they've actually changed at all (though they can easily point out the ways the others changed), but both Twilight and Pinkie have completely lost their original internal moral compass. Alternate Pinkie is essentially the Joker, except what if the Joker was a serial killer whose public face was of a likeable, fun person, not a guy who's just terrifying all the time. And Order Twilight has become so rigidly judgemental that she is willing to cause worse harm to her enemies than they ever caused to her because they are "evil" and she is "good" and she seeks to accomplish something for the benefit of all Equestria so the ends justify the means.
Our Mane 6 retain their moral compass, recognize that torture is evil and wrong no matter why you do it or who you do it to, and want to rescue Discord because he's suffering. Order Twilight wants to use him, and what she wants to use him for necessitates torturing him. They can't compromise here.
As for confirming whether or not Discord is "their" Discord or not... up until now, Order Twilight didn't care. There was no reason to believe that any version of Discord could call on anyone for help, and because his guilt or innocence isn't relevant as long as he's Discord, she doesn't honestly care whether he is the other one resurrected or a completely different one. So she didn't bother to confirm her suspicions because they weren't actually relevant. Now that she has evidence that Discord has just attempted to call someone for help, *now* it's going to be relevant.
So then I take it that you not only hate Spike at Your Service, but have made it noncanon to your stories?
Wonderful, splendid, all of it so far!
brainplucker.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/STMirror-300x225.jpg
Told you I was old.
Just a question, maybe I'm not looking at this right:
Why would Twilight take a letter to Applejack? Wouldn't she just talk to her, and perhaps fetch her back to the library?
Reminds me of this:
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Uggh. Even worse than the bumbling general incompetence, they made him fail at COOKING! When they've already established in numerous episodes that he's a great cook and prepares pretty much all of Twilight's meals.
Brilliant stuff.
It took Spike kinda long to figure out who sent the letter, though. Discord should probably have been his first guess.
So yyou write Discord to be left
handedclawed?Interesting~....
Also, I finally hunkered down and start this story. (I've been meaning to read it for a long time.) So far, the alluded graphic content isn't unnerving me or making me uncomfortable like I was afraid it might. So I think I'll be fine
I'm going to work through it, but I must apologise for being a slow reader. It might be a while before I leave another comment. I am sorry about that.
I'm not the only one with a massive smile on their face, as well as having tears trying to escape their eyes, right? It's just such great writing and emotion that I can't help but smile, but for the same reason I almost start crying. At the same time. This, and the original story with the letter, is absolutely phenomenal. Well done, just, well done.
If this story is abandoned, I will punch every kitten within a fifty mile radius.
Just saying.
This hurts... Hurts so much
5993757 *semi-violently hugs my cats even though the story is still going*
Damn.......poor Discord
Yeah I don't think you need to apologize for repeating several portions of the letter. Having Spike and Twilight read them and react was necessary and really well done. I can't stop now for sure.
Splendid. This story is absolutely splendid