I am an inspiring writer and the best way to practice my writing is by writing fanfics. My favorite shippings are Fluttercord and Darzotl,(daring do and ahuizotl)
Tired of Discord and his pranks. Celestia decided it was time he learns to have new friends and who to help him then his friend, Fluttershy? Will the Spirit of Chaos succeed in having new friends?.....properly not.
*based after Tirek's defeat.
My Editors:
Leapingriver
HoneyGlen
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I like it, but you should really get a prereader/editor.
A few errors here and there. But overall I really enjoy it so far! I like it.
Mistake. Fix it.
All right I fixed it.
I like this story, bad grammar and all. It's about the CONTENT of the story that I care about more when reading anyway, not the nit-picky commas and such. That said, you may just want to look this chapter over again. There were some basic mistakes simply involving things like a having two different words in one spot and such. For example you didn't even capitalize the first word of every new sentence in dialogue.
Your story is awesome, it's a gem, I really love it! I can't say I've found a story that I enjoy this much even with all the grammar mistakes there are. The characters are great, I love the pacing and the setting, the humor is great, and Discord is just awesome. Even the little quips the rest of the Mane5 have are remarkably in character, I especially love how you had Discord mess with Rainbow Dash in this chapter, she totally deserved it.
That being said, I feel like your story could be so much better and even more enjoyable if there were less mistakes. May I ask, do you have an editor? If you don't, I could offer to be your editor. Send me a pm if you'd like me to help out
Good luck on your story, I can't wait for the next chapter!
~Leapingriver
Please decide if your story is in past or present tense.
I think its present in all of the chapters, where do you see the problem where the present and past switches?
The story is good. I think you're capturing personalities very well.
It's hilarious!!!!! XDDDD
There was a lot of simple grammar mistakes in this chapter, but it was fun to read anyway. Now on to the 4th chapter!
Chapter's a little cheesy with the dialogue, especially at the end.
Hmmm.... update?
I rather enjoy this story, in all honesty. T'is a shame it isn't more popular.
I like
, but will there be a fluttercord shipping in the story ?
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Yes very soon ^_^ like the next chapter I was building up their fluffiness in the past chapters but my next chapter for sure.
OMG I AM MORE EXITED THEN EVER NOW FOR THE NEW REALSE
IT'S ALIVE!!! Any way, good chapter. Hurray for eventual Fluttercord!!!
Oh discord.
Soft Kitty~ Always a precious song to use for cutesie moments. I couldn't stop smiling, it was so adorable. I'll keep an eye on this one for now - especially knowing some Fluttercord will come around. Also, the bit with Fluttershy's tail extensions made me laugh so hard.
That said, the grammar is getting better than the first chapter. Some mistakes, but it wasn't as bothersome. So good! (then again, I'm reading this at about 4 in the morning, so mehhh)
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Cool thanks ^_^ I'm glad I made you laugh
I know I should be patient but I just can't what for the next chapter.
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I know it's a long wait and the reason is long is because my editors are on vacation, one of them for a week and the other two weeks. But don't worry the chapter is already half way done all it needs is editing. ^_^
Where those fluttercord fall in this? Hmmm
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coming very soon, I did'it want to rush the relationship, but expect it in the next chapter ^_^
Oh okay! I can't wait for the next chapter
Loving this so far 
First off, I'm sorry I haven't read your work before. I wish I had sooner.
Second, "THE SUN IS ALWAYS WATCHING YOU" made me laugh really hard, and since it's late I had to stifle it a bit in an attempt not to wake others up,
Third...I really enjoy reading this. Your grammar has improved, but even then, you had me interested in the story because your characterization is near flawless, and you do Discord really well. You make him chaotic, and slightly mean, but not so much as to make him a complete jerk (except to maybe Celestia and Luna, but...well, they have a long history of fighting, and old habits are hard to break), and you still make him lovable and likable. In some stories, they really make him so much of a jerk that I forget how much I love him!
Great job. You get an upvote and a favorite!
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Wow! I am so glad you read my story! ^_^ thanks so much for the comments. I loved your story Nuzzle, and it's so awesome that you took the time to read and comment on my story.
Thanks so much!
Awwww.... That's cute. Daddy Discord, eh?
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you know it
HANDS DOWN BEST LINE EVER. As I've said, it's hard to make me literally "LOL" at a story, and once again you've managed to. And once again, I had to stifle it because of the hour.
A few grammar errors, but I really enjoyed this, so once again, bravo!!! Gosh, you really do Discord quite well...Impressive! You have is optimism, his chaotic tendencies, his anger, his obsessions, his fascinations...You could be his scriptwriter!
Anyways, I loved this to bits. And oh, do I see romantic plot development here...?
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Ah shucks ^_^ that is so nice for you to say and sorry for the grammer problems, but I will still work on it!
4802669 Like I said, they are really not a big deal. It's still far too enjoyable for me to really be bothered by it, and it's not too noticable, actually. I'm just an English minor, and we English majors and minors are CRAZY!
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I know what you mean, I'm trying to be an English major too. But I ain't no expert on everything ^_^
4806646 And no one should expect you to, as none of us are, my dear author.
4806666
True true ^_^
Um...Discord...you have magic. JUST POOF A FREAKING DIAPER ONTO THE FOAL!
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HE'S FREAKING OUT! The baby negates his power.... I'm just kidding ^_^ I thought it would be nice to see Discord not using magic ALL the time.
Thanks for commenting though, it's super appreciated.
haha i loved the bingbang theory reference you put in there. I knew I liked you!!!
keep writing cause your stories are amazing
Well played, Celestia. Well played.
Hopefully this story of yours will keep me sated until you update your Pomegranates. You have great ideas for stories, and you have a real understanding for these characters, especially Fluttershy and Discord. Can't wait to see what's in store.
Trust fall? This will not bode well for all involved.
Fair enough, Dissy.
Fluttershy teaching Discord the wonders of friendship. Shenanigans ensue.
Are you writing a fanfic or the pilot for sitcom? I hope it's the latter.
Thhhhhhaaaaattttttt's~ Discord!
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Thank you for your lovely comments! ^_^
None can comprehend the cuteness of the Shy. Which reminds me, HNNGGG--
I'm dead again.
It's great so far hope you write more!
I honestly love this so much
Hopefully you are able to add another chapter soon! I literally can't wait to see what happens next
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I'm working on it right now ^_^ But it might be a while.