Good writing, might want to add a little bit more descriptive stuff in it though, just to spice things up. More often than necessary you sort of skimmed through parts where multiple adjectives and even metaphors where in order.
Apart from that, i'm awaiting further development in the story! I like it how it's not too long, so I was able to fit reading it into my schedule
"On a cool spring morning, a lonely mare finds a stallion with a heart as pure as the whitest light. But the stallion holds secrets with him that still haunt him every day, and every night... Can Rosalina see past the his menacing form at night, or can she truly see the stallion for what he really is? Pony by day, Dragon by night... A story of love and pain, To be settled at Twilight..."
Oh wow! Trashy romance novels! This sounds amazing!
But seriously, Streak, (Insert positive comments here)
The Shrek reference seemed really out of place, but other than that, a good start. I can't wait to read more, but I've gotta finish updating my story first!
“Well...” Twilight rubbed the back of her head with her hoof. “I sort of spilled tea on one of my bed sheets, and I was wondering if you might have something for that.”
a story in a story huh? Sounds ambitious. Twilight will need a lot of detergent!
Oh and FIRST!
I knew what the stain was of! I fucking knew it!
I have to ask where do you find that drawing
me like
You are /really/ making me want to register for this site just so I can track this shit.
9833 same here actually,ive been contomplating it since his pony scales fic but have been to lazy
Oh dear, this looks like it'll be...interesting.
Keep it up Streak!
Nice simple setup, can't wait to see where this flies to.
Keep going!
This is going to be amazing~ Continuing to add more to the much needed Twi/Spike fandom, it seems. Can't wait.
If this is just as naughty as your last fic, I'll be happy :)
*mannequin
Awesome already. Can't wait for more!
So with Spike and Twilight make...
DE MAJICKS!?
Lol twi, better use the detergent sparingly
Ponyception! Story in a story!
Good writing, might want to add a little bit more descriptive stuff in it though, just to spice things up. More often than necessary you sort of skimmed through parts where multiple adjectives and even metaphors where in order.
Apart from that, i'm awaiting further development in the story! I like it how it's not too long, so I was able to fit reading it into my schedule
So when's the next chapter coming out?
well,looks like it's official,i love these fics of yours so much i actually finally made an account here :D
"On a cool spring morning, a lonely mare finds a stallion with a heart as pure as the whitest light. But the stallion holds secrets with him that still haunt him every day, and every night...
Can Rosalina see past the his menacing form at night, or can she truly see the stallion for what he really is?
Pony by day,
Dragon by night...
A story of love and pain,
To be settled at Twilight..."
Oh wow! Trashy romance novels! This sounds amazing!
But seriously, Streak, (Insert positive comments here)
Aah! Aah! She said it!
*After reading part of the lines in the book Twilight was reading, I start adding 2 + 2
Oh, I see. The Dragon at night to be settled by Twilight.
Twlight. Dragon. Twilight Sparkle. Spike.
...
OMGWTFBBQ IT ALL MAKES SENSE NAO!!!
Just pictured a Spike/Rarity hybrid.... My mind exploded
Also... It sounds like Rarity can
(SUNGLASSES)
Read Twilight like a book.
YYYYEEEAAAAHHHHHH
Sorry to be a grammar freak, but there are little baby typos riddled in. Great job anyway!
What's this? I was expecting a clopfic!
>Spike makes a Shrek reference
>Twilight reads book summary
...proceed
9835
Linky no workee!
this kicks ass already
Rarity giggled, “Why yes,
For some bizarre reason I read that as "Rarity giggitied".
...
That needs to be a word
Another great start Streak! Its time to dive deeper...
ALRIGHT!! I GIVE UP!! I WENT TO 4CHAN!! I SAVED IT!! I USED DIFFERENT COMPUTERS!! I TRIED EVERYTHING!!
AND YET I STILL HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE SECOND-FUCKING-THING TWILIGHT SAYS IN THAT PICTURE!!
I CRACKED!! ANYONE!! I DON"T CARE WHO!! JUST TELL ME WHAT SHE SAYS!!
.......
>..>
.....
<..<
....
*click*
The Shrek reference seemed really out of place, but other than that, a good start. I can't wait to read more, but I've gotta finish updating my story first!
9890, dammit man I nearly spit out my coffee!
692163 She says, "Who is my #1 assistant"
102318
There is a deviant art pic of a rarispike hybrid and it is very well done.
But it is kinda hard to find.Good luck
...was that summary bit there at the bottom another nod to Shrek?
really sir or madam, a shrek reference?
A DRAGON...in TWILIGHT...
I see what you did there.
what dos the pix say
Read this first on fanfiction (The One Who Reads Too Much) and now I remembered to look for it here.
It's PLAGIO!
A small error:
It should be: "She blushes a bit with a soft smile as her imagination runs wild."
Other than that I loved it!
Now I want to read the book she's reading that book sounds awesome
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120701023803/mlp/images/thumb/6/6e/Applejack_LoL_face_S2E23.png/800px-Applejack_LoL_face_S2E23.png
“Well...” Twilight rubbed the back of her head with her hoof. “I sort of spilled tea on one of my bed sheets, and I was wondering if you might have something for that.”
SURE, TWILIGHT, WE BELIEVE YOU, RIGHT GUYS?!
3134128 hmm.. -examines the stain- nope, it's not a tea stain. it's Orange juice flavored water. I can shmell the orange!!!!!
jk, just being my normal, odd, slightly perverted, self :3
I wonder means she better in this case
A Dragon in Twilight........... Gotta admit, wasnt expecting to see what image that put in my head.
This is what happened:
*reads title of story*
*reads title of romance novel*
*...........0-0 I now know what the meaning of life is!*
692163 she says "who's my favorite assistant?"
When you didn't outright call it a tea stain when describing the blanket, I knew that something was off.
Told you.
This is just the plot of Shrek...