He's misanthropic, anti-social, lazy, shallow, and kind of a jerk. He's also not very bright. So why on Earth -- any Earth -- would a complete stranger expend the magical energy necessary to shove him into another reality, give him unfathomable power, and grant his every last wish?

Why indeed...

As requested, here's my parody of the second-worst thing to ever happen to fanfiction.* The cover art is only tangentially related, but it amuses me, so I'll keep it unless something better comes along. (A talented artist who loathes this ponyfic sub-genre as much as I do might attempt at some point to draw the main character in all his gear, but I'm not counting on it.)

*The number one spot goes to Erika "Snowqueens Icedragon" Mitchell, a/k/a E.L. James.

Sometimes, dreams are all we have. Sometimes, that's enough.

Hidden deep within a maze, well away from prying eyes, there is a statue. The last great work of an artist long forgotten, her time-worn visage watches the raising and setting of the sun and the moon as though enraptured.
Who created such a marvel, this sculpture of copper and brass, of crystal and cog, and why, is unknown, lost to the mists of time... until now.

This is the tale of a painter and a clockmaker, and the love they shared.
This is the tale of a dreamer, who knew only her dream.

Now with reading by Illya Leonov: Listen to it here.

Scootaloo's already a full-grown mare, but her cutie mark is still missing. Even though she can't fly with her undergrown wings, she's been unable to shake her obsession with the sky. And against all the odds, she hasn't given up on her one dream.

A dream to fly.

Huge thanks to MasterFrasca99 for editing!

Audio reading by Inky Jay

Rainbow Dash and Misty Fly bump into each other in Ponyville, but she has something to tell the Wonderbolt. Unfortunately, it's about something Misty has been struggling with for years.

Thanks to Spirit Shift and IceQB for proofreading.

Tirek gave Twilight a choice: give up her magic, or lose her friends. Twilight chose the latter.

Now, the last of the rebellion has been brought to justice. And Twilight is their final judge, juror, and executioner.

She never expected that the Crusaders would still be alive.

Thanks to Rated Ponystar for help with this story. Wouldn't have finished it without ya.
Also, someone did a reading of it here, if you're into that sorta thing.

Iron Will's goats have been coming to work punched.

He intends to get to the bottom of this.

Edited by Dubs Rewatcher!

Fic reading by M E Lovecolt!

Despite having lived for hundreds of years, Adagio, Aria and Sonata have never heard of Valentine's Day. Now that they know the basics, what better way to celebrate the idiotic holiday than taking over Canterlot High?

No matter what they try, though, Adagio and Aria are having no luck collecting valentines. How can they conquer the school like this? And where's Sonata gone off to?

The answer likely involves a taco or two. And maybe tequila. And definitely Pinkie Pie.

Art by Wee!

The cultural ministry of Yakyakistan has decreed that season 5 of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic needs more yaks and more smashing. They hope that you enjoy this new and improved version of historical events.

Thanks and/or blame to Majin Syeekoh for convincing me I should actually write this.
Thanks to Dubs Rewatcher for pre-reading and advice.

Discord takes offense to a restaurant's claim of serving "unlimited" breadsticks.

Idea inspired by the sheer ridiculousness of the Unlimited Breadsticks meme.

Originally written for the "I Regret Nothing" WriteOff.

Now with a reading by AstroBrony! And a reading by ZeusMacD.

John Joseph was just an average patron of Comic-Con, right up until he was inexplicably transported to the land of magical ponies that he had once thought to only be fictitious. Now, like many other probably-innocent-visitors-of-popular-conventions-who-disappeared-off-of-the-face-of-the-Earth-without-a-trace-yet-strangely-no-one-seems-particularly-adamant-about-investigating-their-disappearances, John has merged with and taken the identity associated with the particular articles of fabric that he had decided to drape himself on that specific day.

It was just too bad that he had decided to go casual for the convention.