When I was a foal, I despised Apple Bloom more than anypony else in the world. Years later, my feelings have changed, and so have Apple Bloom and I. But some things will always be the same: she will always be honest, and I will always be a liar. To her, to my parents, to the world—and to myself.

2nd Place Finalist (Tied) in the 2019 EFNW Iron Author competition. Set several years after the show, as per the prompt.

One way or another, Buttercup always knew things would end like this for her and Bright Mac. She just wished she’d known well enough to wonder what she might do when that moment finally came.

A very, very overdue reworking and posting of my 2018 Everfree Northwest Iron Author entry.

Princess Celestia has been planning for this day for years: the return of Nightmare Moon, the restoration of the Elements of Harmony, and the ushering of Equestria into a new age of friendship and love. Now that it's finally arrived, all she has to do is wait for Twilight to get to Ponyville, make some friends, hunt down the Elements, and save the...

Wait, what'd that letter say?

She didn't get on the chariot?

She went to whose party instead?

Oh. Oh, this could be bad. And more importantly, it's gonna need some hooves-on interference from Celestia to get her master plan back on track. But it'll probably all work out in the end. After all, how big a deal could one party be?

Third-place finalist in Aragon's "Comedy (Is Serious Business)" contest

If diplomacy is an art form, then it's surely the most boring one of the lot. After a full day of fruitless trade negotiations with the Crystal Empire, I'm about ready to give up my royal title if it means avoiding more mind-numbing talks tomorrow. In the meantime, though, at least there's a nightclub in town. And from what I've heard, her Highness Princess Flurry Heart is its most frequent, infamous, and insatiable patron.

On second thought, maybe this trip won't be as tedious as I thought.

My entry for FanOfMostEverything's "Imposing Sovereigns" contest, using the prompt "Partier Flurry Heart. Rated Teen for language, drug use, and suggestive (but non-explicit) content.

Cover image cropped from this piece by Plainoasis. (Sorry, Glim-Glam, but you're not in this story so you had to go.)

Thanks to Themaskedferret for editing/cheerleading assistance.

Yesterday, Dinky Hooves learned a new word. Today, she's going to share that new word with her two best friends at school.

Fluttershy really should've watched her mouth a little more.

[Based on you-all-know-which scene from S6E11: "Flutter Brutter". Thanks to Tayman and themaskedferret for pre-reading.]

It started with a Nightmare: a corrupted monarch, a desperate sister, and a fragmented kingdom left in their wake. Saddled with the burden of protecting Equestria alone, Celestia chose to be strong enough not to. Instead, she found another way: three mortal ponies, the most magically gifted of their generation, to stand by her side as defenders of the realm.

For a thousand years, they've been everything Equestria needed them to be. Scholars, guardians, warriors, heroes—or, as Celestia prefers to call them, Angels. And if their inaugural achievements are any indication, her latest nominees for that illustrious order might just be the best ones yet.

Provided, of course, they don't blow up half the kingdom proving it.

An alternate universe retelling of the events of Friendship is Magic. A non-zero number of changelings were harmed in the making of said account.

Special thanks to CouchCrusader and totallynotabrony for their editing assistance.

Or tries to, anyway. Several things get in her way, among them apple trees, the incompatibility of crystal castles and modern technomagical wiring, mass confusion, and at least one aggressively terrible joke.

In retrospect, she probably should've waited until the afternoon for this.

• • •

Mostly written on very little sleep and sort of inspired by this.

The plan, he thought, was perfect. Instead of returning to the mortal world as a shade of his former self, King Sombra would transmute his soul into the body of his greatest foe, using her influence and power to destroy Equestria from the inside and take vengeance on the Princesses that stole his beloved empire.

There's just one problem: after her fight with Tirek, Twilight Sparkle changed her address. This turns out to be a much bigger problem than Sombra thought. A Dinky-Doo-sized problem, to be precise.

5th-place finalist in the More Most Dangerous Game contest.

Cover art crudely Photoshopped by me from this and this. I am art and so can you.

Reading by Neighrator Pony

In which Button Mash shouts incoherently at the most advanced hoofball simulation ever developed, Sweetie Belle observes and provides internal commentary, and something just left of shipping ensues.

A semi-autobiographical exercise in self-deprecation and peer pressure, sponsored by Obselescence and drinking.

I am Cold, swirling snow that turns ponies against each other, searing ice that freezes them solid. I am Survivor, the one the Friendfyre spell didn't catch, an exception that proves an impossible rule. I am Fear, Frustration, Anger, Hatred, every emotion my Creator has ever felt. I am her Future. I am her Past.

I am Demon, and Clover the Clever is my Master.

Winner of Equestria Daily's Outside Insight Summer Fanfic Contest.

Featured in The Royal Canterlot Library on March 6th, 2015.