• Member Since 14th Dec, 2012
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Twilight Sparkle was desperate: her studies were failing, she lost her friendship, and she kicked Spike out of her library in a fit of rage. After gulping down four buckets of ice cream, she knew that there was only one way out for her...

Warning: contains suicidal Twilight

You can also find this story on DeviantArt

BTW, read this. This is far better than my story!

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 37 )

I don't get it. This isn't enough to push Twilight over the edge. The emotional progression in the first chapter is rushed and the emotion in the second chapter is cheesy. I'm pretty sure this isn't how it works. I fail to see how she could possibly interpret "relax and enjoy your friends" as "you're a total failure and don't deserve to live". No matter how she feels, she wouldn't brush her friends off like that. Even if she did, she'd try to fix it right away instead of doing this.

Last time this happened, she didn't try to suicide. All she did was enchant a doll.

I suggest you try writing stories that are lighter in tone. Not only does this not seem to be your strong suit, but I notice that both your stories are about the same subject. I'm no psychological expert, but I'm pretty sure writing about nothing but suicide is not healthy for you. For your next story, you should try Comedy, Ramdon, and/or Slice of Life. Dr. Jphyper's orders :raritywink:

(*okay, I'm not really a doctor, but still...)

I hate that spider on my wall, he just sits there like he pays rent

2192718

How do you know he isn't? Maybe the cheque just hasn't reached you yet.

Anyway, it's not like parties all night or anything.

jpyper's right, Twi would go crazy over this, but it ultimately falls short of pushing her this far. To be fair this was a tough concept. This kind of emotional break can be a great story, but what this ultimately comes down to is Twilight's experiences and her friends. She would be distraught but with the importance she puts on friendship now and the fact that her friends would physically intervene if needed....ehh

2192766
Spike would tell Rarity and Celestia, Rarity would tell the others and Celestia would grab Shining and Cadence.

*hugs the author*

NOOOOOOOO! TWILIGHT! NOOOOOOOO!

Right in the feels. :applecry: In a good way. :twilightsmile: Twilight gets dangerously obsessive very easily, so I can actually see this happening. Personally though, I could do with more Celestia-angst. :pinkiecrazy:

Yup, that was awesome. Most writers go for the happy "saved just in time" ending, I applaud you for going the whole way with this. The more I read the more I dreaded the possibility this would have one of those types of endings, so once again, thanks for the great story.

(Personally I think a kitchen knife would have fit better in context)

This story was good it made me tear up a little bit reading the note great st:fluttercry:ory

So before I reply individually I'd like to clarify something. I know this is not that much bad that Twilight had only one way out, but Twilight wasn't in the best of minds when she decided to kill herself. She was seriously stressed, sleep-deprived, and self-secluded. Also, in my headcanon, Twilight has some form of depression (mild dysthymia or cyclothymia), which seriously affects her thinking when she is under stress.

Throughout the series, Twilight has been showing signs of psychological issues. She is very likely to be mildly maniac, concerning her behavior near the end in "Swarm of the Century", "Feeling Pinkie Keen", "Lesson Zero", "It's About Time". In "Lesson Zero", "A Bird In the Hoof", she demonstrated a vivid imagination for worst case scenarios. She may also have OCD, concerning her extreme sense of order (for example, in "Spike At Your Service", she was scared when Applejack moved her extra-extra ink bottle). In "The Crystal Empire - Part 2", it was shown that her worse fear was to fail her study and be abandoned by Princess Celestia, which is exactly what appeared to be happening in this story.

Depression can greatly increase the likelihood of suicide, as statistics has shown. When in a depressive state, the mind is prone to making misjudgments and irrational decisions. It is also noted that most cases of suicide are impulsive. To quote Erwin Stengel, "Most people, in committing a suicidal act, are just as muddled as when they do anything important under emotional stress. Carefully planned acts of suicide are as rare as carefully planned acts of homicide." Indeed, a frequent reaction to suicide is "That's not worth dying for." But, as one anon said, "It seemed like a good idea... at the time."

OK, with that out of the way...

2192713
"This isn't enough to push Twilight over the edge."
I hope what I said above can give you an idea of my thought on this issue.
I'm sorry you felt that the emotion progression was rushed; I'll try to make the progression more developed next time.
:pinkiehappy:Thank you for caring about my mental health, but I just like to think about death and depressing stuffs. It certainly doesn't help curing my depression, but I'm not trying to change that.:trollestia:

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I know my story has a lot lacking, but several days ago when I thought about this idea, I did an extensive search and only found one fanfic about Twilight Sparkle committing suicide, so I thought better write a mediocre one than not write one at all. I gave my story some serious thought, revised the plot for several times before deciding on this one. I did my best as a newbie, non-native writer.
(Fun fact: in my search for suicide ponyfic, I have found Scootaloo suicide, Spike suicide, Pinkie Pie suicide, Fluttershy suicide, and TONS OF Rainbow Dash suicide. What's more, the pegasus either used falling from great height or hanging herself, both of which require extreme willpower to close her wings shut)

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:pinkiesad2:Thankyou... I'm so happy... *hugs back*

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I'm glad you enjoyed it... Sometimes it feels good to cry a bit...

2193181
That was what I had in mind: Twilight getting dangerously obsessive, then tragedy ensues. :rainbowhuh:But what is "Celestia-angst"?

2193965
Your comment is my personal favorite. I absolutely HATE it when a "saved just in time" ending happens (unfortunately, about half of the suicide ponyfics I found have this trope), and I'll probably never use that, because I'm a sucker for downer fic.
I know the dread. I felt exactly the same way when I was watching "Dr. Strangelove", fearing that the film would go for "apocalypse averted in the last minute". I was overjoyed when the world was doomed mercilessly in the ending! (:pinkiecrazy:morbid euphoria:pinkiecrazy:)
Kitchen knife? I guess the choice of weapon doesn't really matter. Much more ridiculous suicide methods have been used: swallowing coins/gold bars/underwear; injecting peanut butter/mayonnaire/paraffin; piercing heart with corkscrew/darning needle; hugging stoves; etc etc.

2197068
wow...ok then. I can appreciate your effort and I concede your point. Apologies if I came across as too picky.

2197068
Princess Celestia being way more upset at Twilight's death, especially since she feels responsible. Like, Nightmare Flare-grade upset. You ever read The Empty Room, or Breaking Twilight? Yeah, like that. Celestia-angst.

Um... Couldn't she have just went back in time and tell her past self what'll happen so it doesn't happen? Or does this take place before that episode?

2209709
Even ignoring how useful time travel was in that episode, there's a reason that she doesn't use time travel to cheat all the time.
"Twilight, Twilight, I found something! It doesn't stop time, but it lets you go back in time. It says you can go back once, and it only lasts for a few moments. Does that help?"

2218459 Oh... Makes sense why she didn't use it now.:twilightsheepish:

2193965

Oh and BTW, here's some information I found about types of weapons used by suicidal cutting/stabbing:

In Sweden, kitchen knives were used in about 1/3, razor blades in another 1/3, and other knives in 1/5 of cutting and stabbing suicides. There is similar data from Japan, where the same three categories accounted for 78% of cutting and stabbing suicides.
The length and shape of the wound track usually give a good, but not infallible, reflection of the weapon used. Obviously a wide blade cannot make a narrow wound track, but a slim blade is certainly capable of expanding a narrow cut into a wider one. Similarly, and 4-inch blade cannot make an 8-inch-deep cut, but an 8-inch knife can easily make a shallower cut by the simple expedient of not thrusting to the hilt. It is possible for the track to be an inch or more longer than the blade: It the thrust is made with enough force, it will compress the body. This was the situation in a fatal stabbing in the heart with a small pocketknife.

I found this story morbidly hilarious, though it's premace is quite similar to one of the ones i'm going to be writing soon(2weeks-1year)

wait why does twilight have a switchblade in her bedroom draw :facehoof:

2394377

You know, for sharpening quills. See below.
Reference
flick.com/~liralen/quills/smtools.jpg

(BTW, :twilightblush: I didn't think about this when I wrote this, and now it makes perfect sense! :twilightsmile: thank you for pointing this out.)

Fridge Brilliance.

1.normally when somepony or someone slits their throat,and that will drain all your blood in 4 seconds as I remember....
2.why the hell would twilight have had a switchblade?!

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1. From Geo Stone's Suicide and Attempted Suicide, which I consulted extensively while writing this:

A cut-throat wound most often causes death by hemorrhage. Severing either the left or right carotid artery or the nearby jugular vein will cause fatal blood loss within about 5 min. Since blood flows into the head via carotids, unconsciousness might occur a couple of minutes after cutting one; perhaps a minute or two longer if the jugular veins are sliced instead.

2. Consult this comment. 2395508

YESSSS!!!!!

LET THEIR BE BLOOD!!!!!

Motivated by my heavy studying

I'm still in the college circuit, so I could really tell

What was the math problem that Celestia gave Twilight? Fermat's last theorem?

When things become such a distress, dont worry one step puts everything to rest.
:fluttershyouch:

While I understand the downvotes I think this was very well written.

4147456
(im sorry, i'm jumping on the bandwagon)
A broken mirror
A bleeding fist
A silver blade against a wrist
Tears falling down to lips unkissed
Ignore her and she won't exist
She's not the kind you'll come to miss

Comment posted by Rhythm Beats deleted May 22nd, 2020
V8

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10 years later, she resurrected, just like Micheal De Santa.

Dude what, that's such a dumb reason to kill yourself. All she did was tell her friends to go away she just needs to apologize, and Celestia would 100% let twilight retake the exam when she calms down.

Just meditate for an hour and apologize, or better yet ask zecora to teach you meditate and ask for like a calming tea or something. The suicide just comes right out of left field and just makes no sense at all, 4/10 would have been a 8/10 if twilight got help or there was more build up to the suicide.

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