• Member Since 24th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

Wise Cracker


Just some guy, riding out his time.

Comments ( 564 )

We are so glad thou shared thy secret scroll. We very much like thine story and writing style hoof servant.

“’Daring Do and the Glaring Fetish’, sounds like the old series to me. If all she does is chase after a magic statue that stares, I’m okay with it,” Rainbow offered.

The idea that Rainbow Dash jumps to the non-dirty interpretation of the title is somehow humorous. It's just so far from how I expect her reaction; I would have thought she'd keep giggling while a red-faced Twilight tries to explain to her the non-dirty meaning of fetish.

And how did you even cast that spell if it was unfinished?”

“You know, I’m honestly not sure. I didn’t put that much power into it, I just said the words. Never had a spell that worked like that before,” Twilight offered.

Thank! You! :flutterrage: very much. :twilightsmile:

That's the one friggin thing about that episode I just can't bear! :twilightangry2:

Sixty-four episodes long magic has been something intricate and mysterious, yet wonderfully simple. Read about a spell, practice, cast, repeat. Now suddenly there are spells that have to rhyme, and are cast by saying them out loud, intentionally or not?
What's next? Badly translated latin? (no offense meant to fans of the Harry Potter series. The books, that is. If you only watched the movies you have no right to complain, period)

I'm loving this opening chapter. Thank you for sharing this with me, Wise Cracker.
I'll read the second chapter probably some time tomorrow and write up a more detailed feedback post.
:twilightsmile:

You know what? Buck it. Thumbs up for the idea alone. :rainbowlaugh:
Too bad I'm not in the mood for clop right now. :applejackunsure:

Well thank you for publishing it.
It is very visually stimulating, I can see why Rainbow was effected so easily.
Thanks for writing it.

Somehow I found the secret about her hooves to be really adorable. It goes a long way to explaining (from a fanon point of view) why she doesn't wany anypony touching her hooves.

The part where Twilight is secretly hypnotizing her seems a bit dark though. I was hoping this would be some cute Twidash, but meh, even if it is a bit darker that won't stop me from reading on if you post more of this.

This proves the nigh limitless power of the Mind Control group!

3507499 SO MUCH DOCTOR WHO IN THAT PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!:pinkiehappy: I eagerly await the next chapter my good author

3310302 THANK YOU I HAVE READ THE BOOKS AND SEEN THE MOVIES AND THE MOVIES DO THE BOOKS NO JUSTICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FUCKS ARE GIVEN TO THE POTTERHEADS THAT ONLY WATCH THE MOVIES

3508764yes so many much doctor makes me a happy person it does :moustache:

“’Daring Do and the Glaring Fetish’, sounds like the old series to me. If all she does is chase after a magic statue that stares, I’m okay with it,” Rainbow offered.

Oh, the dramatic irony.

3508627
Well, really, if there's any group that should be adept at controlling public opinion...

Oh my god that face on the cover is so goddam cute I squealed.

Is good story. Feelink obligated to point out however...

She nuzzled and licked at Daring’s chest, seeking out the little nips beneath that short fur.

...that chest mounted mammary glands are not a recurring equid feature. But a primate one.

Strangely enough, you'd been perfectly fine saying "arms" instead of "forelegs". As that's what a horse's forelimbs are referred to as. (They also have cannons, to add to the anatomical confusion.).

But other than that one little anatomical anomaly, is good story. :heart: Hope to see more.

this is very relevant to my interests. and i didn't even no that.

I'll be quite honest, I'm not quite sure what was going on after the Daring Do part. :rainbowwild:
...
:pinkiegasp:

Not quite sure if Twilight really mind controlled Dash, or just heard the scene play out (By order of dash's talking)

Either way, this story has great potential, and I can't wait for more.

You release this right as I'm in the midst of a resurgence of my hypno fetish...

One of these days I'm going to write a hypno-fic...

Will read later when I'm not stuck cooking my dinner.

3509874 3536701
I'm going to follow the same rule regarding replying to comments as I did on my previous fic (ie not going to do too much of it) but I will make this slight P.S.A.:

I'm going by anthropomorphised anatomy, which means mammaries would be chest-mounted. I'm aware this is not correct for horses, but I had some reasons to consider.

-my pre-fimfiction days mostly involved furry fiction (and hypnosis, so expect that to be closer to accuracy than average). I'm more familiar with furry sex scenes than I am with ferals, which is what ponies would be. Please don't ask for my FA name, if you can't figure out who I am, you don't know me very well. And my FA is kinda dead anyways.

-the ponies we know can stand stably on their hind legs, which regular horses cannot do. They also seem to twist their shoulderblades somehow, which has made making 3D models of the damn things a living nightmare. I swear, if I ever write a book about converting cartoons to 3D models, I'm adding a whole bloody chapter called 'The Disappearing/Reappearing Shoulder Problem'. Bottom line there is that they not only assume the posture of a human, but their anatomy, their bone structure, actually shifts to fit that of a human. As far as I can tell, at least. I'm probably wrong.

-to the best of my knowledge, horse genitalia aren't quite built for masturbation. Then again, neither are hooves. If I want to write a lovemaking scene of any description, I will have to skimp on realism to some degree. Of course, that also means I'm free to add little quirks regarding wingboners and the like :scootangel:. Skipping on anatomical correctness can actually open up some comedic potential.

-the main reason I prefer to take this anthropomorphisation, even if they aren't anthros in the story, is because of the scenes that would unfold. Put nipples on the chest and you get the basic range of erogenous zones, a nice and even distribution. Put them down lower and what do you get? Earnip, kiss lips, lick neck, nothing, nothing, maybe stroke ribs, then find the nipples when the other one's snout is in smelling range of the genitals. While I can see how that would work to some extent, I'm just not good enough to make that appealing, and it would conflict with some future scenes if I remained correct (ie: the smell needs to be farther away for some scenes to work). A lot of the story is still undecided at this point, but suffice to say rubber will be involved in copious quantities in a future chapter, and not in the way you think. Trust me, whatever you're thinking of, it's worse. Or better, depending on your point of view. Bottom line: I need that to be there for this story, not lower.

Also, it was originally 'arms', then someone told me ponies don't have arms. Serves me right for listening, I guess. :facehoof: I'll try to just use 'arms' in future chapters, then, thanks for that.

3509488
Really? Huh. It's funny, you know. That's actually a screenshot from one of the most hated episodes of the show, and by extension one of my favourites.

Incomplete? COUNT ME IN.

This looks like it's gonna be something goooood! :twilightblush:

"Most of the feedback could be summarised as "More, please." "
i think it can be more accurately summarized as this.....
3513245

...Not quite sure what I just read, but I'm interested enough to see where this might go.

Proceed.

So... it was all a dream in RD's head?
And Twilight heard it, even though it didn't actually happen?
But she's going to screw with RD anyways?

Awesome. :rainbowlaugh:

I can see the next chapter now...

:twilightsheepish: Ready for chapter 2?
:rainbowhuh: Sure! Uh, what's that on the table there?
:twilightsmile: Oh, just some ointment. In case someone gets stiff.
:rainbowderp: ...

3509453 Yes! First it was the featured list, next, the world!
[Credit goes to the writer of the story and not the groups promoting it]

3510866

suffice to say rubber will be involved in copious quantities in a future chapter, and not in the way you think. Trust me, whatever you're thinking of, it's worse. Or better, depending on your point of view

Good sir, you have my insanely focused interest.

I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to everyone who commented on the second chapter of the story before it was published. I deleted the chapter to ensure it would show up on notifications when posted.

I really am sorry I had to do this, but it was a judgment call between upsetting early fans and and people missing updates. For more information on the problem at hand, I wrote a blog post here detailing a similar thing that happened with Changeling Blood, the first fic (I'm told) of mine that got featured. Chapter updates weren't coming through, and as such I lost a lot of exposure and, more importantly, I may have lost a good chunk of reader attention early on.

I said I'd update weekly. I inted to do my best to hold that promise. It wouldn't do if my first update made it look like I was breaking that promise already.

So again, sorry for the inconvenience, check the blog to make sure you're aware of how the update system works and you can avoid losing views. Do not abuse the fix for it.

Hmm...

I generally loathe any sort of mind control, but you've really made it seem realistic. The way they've talked about it prohibits the usual things like making her do things she doesn't want to, or being sub-human... er, sub-pony, I guess. Anything is fine as long as it comes with mutual respect and real emotions. It's even worse when the one with the control goes all batshit. I realize that, in the heat of the moment, Twi will probably do some iffy stuff, but you've laid out that it would never be out of malice or malevolence. That line about not being called a slave pretty much takes care of everything I usually hate about these stories.

I'm... very interested in where you can take this. Even with my general dislike of Inter-mane six shipping, I... I really want to see where this goes. :ajsmug:

awesome chappy, i look forward to the next :twilightsmile: I have no complaints about how this is turning out so yup :pinkiehappy:

To my understanding post-hypnotic suggestion only works if you let it. I don't think Twilight could make her do anything in public that she didn't want to. Other than that, great stuff, looking forward to more.

3535888
I know that and Twilight knows that, but Rainbow Dash doesn't know that at this point. The full rules of hypnotism over mind control magic will be discussed in the next chapter and made apparent after their first session.

3535893 Ah I see, so she was just reassuring Dash. That's good.:twilightsmile:

3510866 That's a lot of words for saying, "They're anthros". We have a tag for that. :D Might lessen the confusion.

3535965 3536701
So many words for... you effing...:flutterrage:

*ahem*

They're not anthros, that's not what I said. The ponies we see on the show are already anthropomorphic, evidenced by their standing on hind hooves and their shoulder blades going into positions real horse anatomy cannot reach. Octavia, the way we've seen her, is not an anthro, but she is an anthropomorphised pony. As part of this anthropomorphisation, I added one more detail of human anatomy to the equation because that's what human readers are more familiar with, among other reasons.

The ponies in this story are not anthros, not anymore than they are in other fanfiction. Anthros are creatures where the process of anthropomorphisation is taken to a logical conclusion, not oscillated between midway as is true for the canon ponies. Anthros walk on their hind legs as a default and have their scapulas (I think that's the word?) set permanently in the direction a human's would be, not to mention frequently being depicted as having hands instead of front hooves and their proportions being altered to match a human's.

There is a reason I use so many words. It's so things are clear when people read them. I already had to make a judgment call about cutting one this story's tags (it's one you're not seeing right now, so no spoilers there).

*cracks whip* Now be quiet, sit down and wait for the rest of the story. :trixieshiftleft:

[By the way, can you tell which side of the D/s community I used to be on :raritywink:?]

Great chapter. I think Rainbow Dash is adorable in this story and the hoof trauma is pulled off nicely. The open discussion about what they're going to be doing is a nice touch as well, making everything mostly consensual. Also, Rainbow Dash's desire to be submissive seems to hit the nail on the head. The stresses of leadership are a good trigger for that kind of fantasy.

She nuzzled and licked at Daring’s chest, seeking out the little nips beneath that short fur.

Aren't they located a bit lower than on the chest? Whatever, nice start and dang RD has some amazing dreams! <3

don't you want to know the status of twi's flying capacity though?....

3536951
Nope :eeyup:. Got too much on my mind, don't want to get dragged into the hype or get distracted. I am perfectly Zen with no new pone, I do not need to know anything. In this story, Twilight can fly, but it's mostly a matter of convenience so she can reach Rainbow's house. Whether she can fly in canon is not something I need to know, nor do I want to.

I'm can't watch Season 4, for reasons that have nothing to do with the show itself (well, mostly). It's in one of my previous blogs. I just can't afford to watch it right now. No biggie, it'll be there when I get the time or desire for it.

3536982 k...

i have the feeling though now that it's so long after start of the new season stuff about it is going to be posted anyways....

and i can't see a blog where you say you can't watch the new season.....

3537000
Oh, I don't mind people posting fics of it. I can avoid those, I don't read much fan fiction anyway. Here's the blog that details my problem (it's the final point that's the major one, the ones before just let me justify it to myself better):

Why I'm not watching Season 4 yet.

It's a serious problem I'm having, and I'm trying to fix it by taking charge of things one at a time. Slowing down my writing was one, delaying my viewing of Season 4 was another. Avoiding replying to comments is a third, but I suppose people ought to know why the story is what it is.

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