Twilight is summoned by Celestia to discuss both their futures. Will she be able to make a decision that will not only change her life, but possibly affect the fate of all of Equestria? And will she be able to handle the truth when she discovers the true cost of Celestia's and Luna's existence, and how they tie in with the elements of harmony?
A little side story I've had on my mind for quite a while, I hope those who read it find it entertaining. It's not to dark or sad, but enough that I felt the tags were necessary.
Chapters (3)
Complete, really? I have trouble seeing how anyone could stand to write something so good only to end it here.
1643015 Thanks for the kind words. I might write more to the story eventually, possibly a prologue to explain the details leading up to it. The pre-story however is based heavily on a mlp table top game, so I might make a story based on that when it ends. As for a epilogue to the story... At first I had this large detailed end event planned for how Equestria was affected by Twilight's decision, but I thought it might be more interesting to allow people to imagine how it all went down, to make their own fan canon for it.
I was also pretty worried the story would be a flop, since it was my first time trying to tell a story in this manner. Not to mention my first launch into the sad category. Thanks for the support and feedback everyone.
Interesting, does each Celestia gain the same form as the first or do they become their own versions? The idea of the Princess' is one of the more common ones but this presents it in a new light.
Awaiting more
BlackWinter
Just so you know-you spelled dying wrong.
Interesting. This makes sense though. I can hardly believe that the princesses are completely immortal. In the natural world, life revolves in cycles. It would be strange if the representatives of sun and moon respectively didn't follow the trend.
You definitely left it in a state that demands continuation.
Some minor grammar issues can be overlooked, given how well you narrated and explained your idea of how Equestria is ruled.
The next chapter or two could actually be devoted to Twilight coming to terms (or not) with these new responsibilities, debating the possibilities and perils of the role she is to assume.
Did Fable inspire/affect this story at all? Celestia seems similar to the "Jack of Blades" of Fable. (only in traits not in personality) Neither are immortal but both appear to be so. Also both are Legendary yet relatively weak.
If you ever made a sequel/prologue/epilogue I would definitely read it.
Anyway this is a fantastic story.
1643470 They each look like Celestia we all know, even the first one didn't look like Celestia until after the spell.
1643820 Fixed, thanks.
1643980 Yeah, though they do live longer due to their great power.
1644468 Thanks. I honestly expected the story to bomb and at best get ignored, at worst get flamed for my story. But it ended up exploding with people who liked it, and is probably my second most popular story. I actually have been considering writing a second part to it showing Twilight's decision, how she tells those she can, and if she is able to stop herself from telling her family.
1673542 While I have played Fable and it is easily one of my favorite rpgs, it didn't inspire this story. What really helped inspire this story were all those stories about how Celestia lived forever, how sad it was that she out lived everyone she cared about. Then when they showed the hearth warmings eve story I began thinking 'Why weren't the princesses there?' Then I ended up writing a post hearth warmings eve table top game, and the birth of Celestia and Luna became a major future plot point and this story ended up being the long term end result of all that happened in it. Epilogue/sequel might happen after I finish my avatar crossover story, but the prologue likely won't happen for a long time, if ever. Since the game I'm running would have to finish.
That was a very long post, sorry. I just wanted to respond to all those who took the time to comment and let you know I read and pay attention to each and every post, and I appreciate your words.
1674067
You are officially AWESOME!
I'd say "20% cooler" but that's TradeMarked.
Which Avatar? The awesome Cartoon/crappy movie? (The last Airbender) Or the blue alien one? (Overhyped hug a tree story)
I would read the former in a heartbeat.
EDIT: YES!! You don't know how happy you've made me!
1674127 The former. It's the first story I've written on fimfiction, and it's almost done with the first book. It's also my longest story by far.
1674157
Sometimes it's confusing when I'm making comments because I'll keep revising what I've said for a few minutes after I post it.
(And then I don't know exactly what their responding to all of the time.)
1674175 No problem. And I'd try not to get your hopes up to much. I've tried my hardest on the avatar story, but I can't guarantee it's that good. I do hope it's at least interesting and unique to you. And that you enjoy it. ^^
1674191
Don't worry about it. Even if it isn't the best I'm reading this for FREE... so what do I have to complain about?
anyways +20 to -4 is great. (I've read fics with a +1 to -1 ration that were good.)
After the rather large response to this story I decided to add two more sections to it. I want to thank everyone who took the time to read it and I hope you'll enjoy the next sections just as much. They'll have to do with Twilight's goodbye, and the transformation.
And here it is, the second of three chapters. It was really hard to write, and I left a lot of the goings on pretty vague, but I really hope I did a good job, and I hope those who have enjoyed the original part, enjoyed the second part as well. I want to thank everyone who liked the story so much. I really wasn't going to write any more to it, but I wanted to thank all of you. So here, a continuation of the story.
...Grats on the feat. Also, this is excellent.
Not the best fit, but, whatever.
Augh... The scene with her parents was especially painful...
Personally, I could see her TELLING Shining Armor and Cadence the truth. (not her parents, just them) I mean it would be important letting the third alicorn know the truth and how could you tell Cadence and not her BBBFF? Plus they would be able to keep the secret and it would lead to her being less alone.
I feel so sorry that Twilight doesn't seem to have any relationship with her parents. She won't tell her parents the truth? What would that hurt, they will probably pass on soon. They wouldn't tell. This story really pulls at the sad strings of my heart
Ciao darling
And with this chapter, it's done. This was a really hard chapter, I managed to get all the information out I wanted, but getting the right words and the feel for it was extremely difficult. I also didn't want to reveal to much, prefering to give more an outline of how things were happening, what ponies were experiencing, and leave it more to the thoughts of the reader how they thing everything would turn out. For everyone who reads this story, I really hope you enjoyed it and thanks for taking the time too.
This deserves a lot more attention. It's damn, damn good.
Ok this was fantastic but I do have one question. Did you base the unicorn twins off the Lutece twins from Bioshock Infinite cause they seem very similar.
Good work and well done in creating an awesome story
2132020 Thanks ^^ It was a lot of fun to write. Though sometimes it made me sad.
3718718 Nope, not at all. In fact, the story was finished before Bioshock Infinite even came out. Months in advance at that. :) I've honestly never played any of the bioshock games though. Never have the time and when they're on sale I usually have a major back log so never even pick them up.
3719568 In all honesty I never looked at the date published. Maybe the bioshock team copied them off you cause they are almost scarily similar.
Regardless you've done an awesome job with this story.
3719782 That would be AWESOME! Something I wrote actually being good enough to steal? Eeeee! Granted, it would suck in a way too, but still. I'd feel pretty cool. :) Also, thanks! I honestly hadn't thought about this story in ages, it's kinda nice coming back to read old stories. Also, it feels a heck of a lot sadder reading it now than it did when I was writing it...