Just Words
by
Twilight breaks Celestia's doors.
But then, you'd be mad too, if your stupid brother got drunk and told you that you were adopted...
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Twilight breaks Celestia's doors.
But then, you'd be mad too, if your stupid brother got drunk and told you that you were adopted...
That description.
Edit: All of my money... all of it! TAKE IT!
Damn, Celestia just got owned. Understandable for Twilight Twinkle, and understandable for Celestia, but I think both sides of this equation got blown to smithereens. Well, that DOES tend to happen when mortals and immortals cross paths on a more... intimate level. No one ends up happy.
Why must this be posted right as I'm about to leave the site for possibly the rest of the day whyyy![]()
Well can't wait to read it.
An excellent tale and an interesting take on the "Twilight is Celestia's daughter" idea
I wasn't sure what to expect...not at all.
But...well done. Just these words. Well done. I can't think of anything else to say.
This is a Good story you've written.
Damn it, Device.
When you said in your last blog post that this one was going to involve the tear ducts, i didn't think you'd actually leave me sniffling by the end.
Though i can see why this was a challenge for you. I mean, you wrote a story about Twilight and Celestia... but it wasn't a Twilestia story. Those things are like, your favorites ever. Must have been hard.
Welp, rocket to the moon and back my friends: This thing's gonna get featured harder than a dog in heat around a werewolf (I don't know why I made that joke).
I think I probably would have stopped reading the instant I even suspected who the mother was in this if it was anybody else writing this story.
And it's a good thing I did finish reading, because it didn't disappoint. Now get back to work on Nocturne. ![]()
Who disliked this story? What's wrong with it? Is it because Twilight is Celestia's daughter? It can't be because of grammar or something like that. Obviously, the only thing it could be is a troll.
...
You know what? I give up. I now realise that it is impossible to come away from one of your fics unaffected. I recommend anyone who reads this and anything else from your pen have pictures of sheer D'aaawwsome to fall back on as soon as they finish.
If you'll excuse me now, I'm going to let my good friends Ben and Jerry help me forget all the feels that this evoked.
It's probably #2.
Poor DH. I've never seen someone have so many people go out of their way to mess with someone else over the internet.
Celestia, this is the mare who discovered a story you'd buried for centuries just in time to be present for its resolution. Who researched a whole species and learned at least one spell specifically for defeating them in the course of an afternoon. Who worked out a method to alter the appetites of an entire swarm of unfamiliar creatures on a whim. Do you really think she's never going to ask about her birth parents?
Finding out she was adopted was a system shock. It changes everything because no one told her, not because it changes anything.
Finding out she's yours (and she will find out) is going to change everything. The fact that you arranged it for the sake of her distance from you, but found a way to be close to her anyway- that you spent years by her side and never told her, not even in secret, not even when she was old enough to decide for herself whether to face the consequences of making it known... not even when she came to you already knowing half the truth, and you came within inches of telling her the rest...
A lifetime of growing up surrounded by Blueblood and his ilk wouldn't have damaged her nearly as much as that's going to.
Oh...
Damn...
Wow...
You hit me right in the feels man, and you did it hard. I'm honestly really sad now.
This was so sweet. ![]()
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I never thought a Twilestia fanfic would turn out like this. ![]()
...I LOVE IT!! ![]()
Congratulations. Many a manly tear has now been shed. ![]()
This story was very simple, a little predictable perhaps, but also very well executed. The moment where Celestia realized just how much she lost with her kneejerk abandonment was where the waterworks began.
I'm confused by 'That you are not yourself also Luna's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-granddaughter is irrelevant to the reality of the love you two share.' Is it implying eros?
This is one of those situations where all choices are bad and all options can only mitigate, not prevent harm. Twilight doesn't need to know who her biological mother is. She doesn't need to know why she's the most powerful Unicorn in recently recorded history. She doesn't need to know why she feels such a kinship for the Princesses. What she needs... is to be happy.
Celestia, as best as she knows how, is trying to achieve that.
Before featured! Yeah, its that good. I love this story, best of luck to you
So sweet...
I love it!
This reminded me how few good 'Celestia is Twilight's mother' fics, we have.![]()
Celestia is secretly Twilight's mom, check. Only a couple more possible relationships to go!
"Dear Mom" really struck me. And the whole thing is very believable.
This is gonna make Twilight's suppressed attraction to Celestia even more awkward for the girl...
Hmmm... It's never just "happily ever after" with you, Mr. Heretic. Always a catch or a qualifier. Thumbs up, of course.
Honestly, there should be a lot more stories like this. They are heart touching and complex enough that you have to use your brain while reading, Even if the "Twilight is actually Celestia's daughter" part was somewhat obvious sooner or later the rest isnt.
Twilight of course WANTS to know who her biological parents are, a lot would want to. Dont know if Celestia's attempt to make her reconsider that will work, given twilights studious nature. Maybe she wont want to find out right away but she will want to know eventually.
And then Twilight settles down with someone, gets pregnant, genetically lucks out and gives birth to a winged unicorn. Angry questioning all around. ![]()
I kind'a hate but also kind'a love that the big secret didn't come out. I'm not sure how to put how betrayed she'd feel into words without it being an understatement, especially if it's late in her life and it's apparent that Celestia intended her to remain ignorant of it throughout her entire life. I'd like to think that Shining Armor would come out and tell her someday, though. Preferably with some tact, i.e. not while drunk.
I honestly never expected this kind of story from you.
Not your best work, but certainly better than most of the other people who try to write it.
why didnt she told her WHYYYYY..... UGHHHHHHHH
Device Heretic
-vs-
Your Feels
Flawless victory.
I'm given to understand that he took it on himself to see if the idea (which he...well you've all read Eternal[1]) can be made into a good story. It so transpires that it can.
[1] If you haven't, what on Earth are you doing here? Go read Eternal. Go on. I'll wait. Make sure to pack tissues and, possibly, an alcoholic drink of considerable potency. Chocolate also works well.
I refer the honourable gentleman to the comment I made some hours ago. ![]()
That is a bad place to be in.
Well, Its been a while since I read a tragedy story that good. Very good DH, very good. Your stories never fail to bring some emotion to me, but they still have to bring to the ultimate expression of sadness. But I still have yet to read Eternal and several of your stories, so we shall see if you have the honor of finally completely breaking my emotional barriers.
I really don't like the idea of Twilight being adopted and Celestia being her natural mother, so this is isn't even a contender for my favorite story by you. Nonetheless, it's (again) a good and very well written story. In a sense this story and its implications actually confirm my view that Twilight being Celestia's daughter would be a bad thing. So... well done, I suppose ![]()
My favorite part has to be the beginning with Twilight being furious and Celestia simply defelecting and dispelling her rage (or at least making it look simple). I can totally see that happening more than once in all their years together.
Great job! Weitermachen ![]()
NTL
Oh come on. The end of Eternal was as close to happily ever after as is realistically possible for mortal beings.
Facehoofs directed at celestia. I will now be on my way.
A good story... kinda milking it with all the philosophisizing but good... Would be better if there was a sequel where Twilight eventually realizes that Celestia is her mom too!![]()
I had to choke back some tears near the end.
I swear, device, you made a pact with a devil of some sort. Your writings are just too good.
You son of a... respectable women (I should hope). How dare you post something so heart-warmingly sad?
On one hand, Celestia is a terrible mother and a blatant coward. On the other, Twilight is probably better for it, so the best thing Celestia could have done as a mother is give her a life of her own, not overshadowed by her mother.
Talk about a clusterfuck.
I teared up. ![]()
Then I raged a Celestia for making such a selfish decision not matter how she wants to justify it to herself. Twinkle was right. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! ![]()
Ooh, look, an opportunity for discussion.
I don't know if I could explicitly lay out my definition of a good story. To say the least there are several types, and what fits the criteria for one may miss every checkpoint for the others. What I like in a comedy may be different from or even mutually exclusive with what I like in an adventure story, a mystery or a tragedy.
But I do know that this isn't it. The problem Celestia faces here is one I struggle with in my day-to-day life- deciding when to admit to a mistake, knowing that the discussion that follows will be painful. And she handles it badly. Realistically, to be sure- her methods echo those I have used time and again- but badly nonetheless. This is a choice that never works out for me, and to be shown a creature with infinitely more power and centuries more experience than myself make my own mistake, continue to make it, and be given no resolution? That's not enjoyable for me. That doesn't even provoke other emotions to a degree that I can say it was a good experience rather than a fun one.
The combination of plot and character laid out for us in this text necessarily implies a sequence of events. Of these events, not all are shown, and the ones shown seem handpicked to showcase a facet of the human condition- not a facet I understand and condone, or even one I understand and regret, but one I hate even upon seeing it in myself for its childish and yet undying illogic and the prevalence it achieves despite this.
tl;dr It's about something that makes me mad, and depicts Celestia losing to that same thing. I don't think that's a good story. When Celestia is fallible, she should at least be fallible in a godlike way- like in Eternal, for example.
Sometimes, I think being immortal would be terrible for my common sense.
Anyways, I'm not a fan of the Twilight is Celestia's daughter thing, either... as I saw a few people mention. But, I do enjoy all your stories! Bravo, my good sir.
Are you inside my brain?
Because I seriously just had the idea to write a fic where Twilight finds out she's Celestia's daughter.
Of course, I didn't actually write it because getting my ideas out of my head is an impossibly hard procedure for me. ![]()
I held a straight poker face the entire time while reading this. I guess I'm emotionally disturbed. Awesome story, though. Keep up the good work. I've been looking for a good "Twilight is Celestia's daughter" fic for awhile now.
Hm. The thing I like most about this is that this is exactly, specifically and explicitly not a "Celestia is Twilight's mother" fic.
Dammit man, I am still recovering from Dictated, not Read! Do you know how awkward it is to work for ten hours and not be able to stop weeping?
I really don't like the idea of Twilight being adopted and Celestia being her natural mother, so this is isn't even a contender for my favorite story by you. Nonetheless, it's (again) a good and very well written story. In a sense this story and its implications actually confirm my view that Twilight being Celestia's daughter would be a bad thing. So... well done, I suppose
Oh, I agree. Twilight being Celestia's daughter is a horrible horrible idea that diminishes the relationship. I can still enjoy (via tear ducts) the story because I mentally classify it as an elseworlds tale, as it were. You might (jocularity incoming) even call it (joke imminent) heretical fiction (pause for laught--what no? no-one? really? ok.).
Hmmmm....not sure I agree. I can see your point clearly, the story does seem to end where it does by authorial fiat. That's what Device wanted to paint[1] and, lo, that's what got painted. Thus at the end, things are left unsaid. Ambiguous. Fair enough.
Where my opinion differs is in that I think this fits with the story[2]. The story ends with words unsaid because that's where Twilight and Celestia are right now. The tragedy is just there -- in things unsaid. The end echoes that. The unresolved tension, possibly leading to a sense of hollowness is part of the desired effect.
As for the weakness of Celestia, that's 100% deliberate. Celestia fallen and possibly redeemed and that only after loss is his signature. Device's Celestia is very much imperfect but never evil[3] and the consequences of this imperfection when married to vast power and endless tracts of time in which to do regrettable things is where a lot of his stories come from (see also, Eternal).
Tl;dr -- I want a resolution too, and wish Celestia to be called on her mistakes and then redeemed in some way. But, I think I understand why I won't get that.
[1] Watercolors, mostly, using fan tears for thinner. Lately, though, he's been dabbling in blood. The early results have been stunning, of course, but I feel we are in for even greater things. Oh, we'll see such sights, you and I.
[2] It isn't the only way to write it, of course, heavens no. The sequel very nearly writes itself, though making it work is...quite the challenge.
[3] "So be it" being the exception that proves[4] the rule.
[4] I recognize (and than ignore) that this is, in fact, a misuse of that iconic phrase.
Tell me, do you read Sutter Cane? ![]()
The wiki is...not reliable. It has been posted around on, I think, the DA accounts of some of the artists. Mind, I've also heard Twilight Velvet.
That's an illuminating[5] review you have there. A bit on the short side. Care to expand?
[5] Well, illuminated, in the classical definition of the term.
Pah-LEASE! You don't have enough daddy issues to be Lucifer. An unmitigated asshole, sure, but hardly Fallen Angel level.
You know
The fandom's plausible takes on the material are competing to superimpose themselves on the show as I watch it.
I can't tell if they're affecting me for the better or not, but I'm affected all the same.
It's like I'm watching the show in augmented fiction mode.
Is that what it's all about for you? Making people look at it differently than they did before?
At any rate, it's Entertaining.
ive been waiting for your take on " Twilight is Celestia's Daughter" since you had the female pony version of jeff goldblum state that this was a common rumor back in Nocturne.
you did not disappoint.
One thing I particularly liked is that you dealt with the main physical problem " twilight being celestia's daughter " presents that is twilights close physical resemblance to her canon mother. By turning her mother into her aunt, and thus keeping them close blood relatives you gave us good reason for those genes to manifest in twilight.
On the other hand ( and this isn't a criticism, for i believe it to be intentional) i want to yell at both Celestia and Twilight.
Im totally stunned that Twilight didn't work out who her mother is. The moment she stomped into her chambers I thought Twi was going to basically call the old mare out. I mean really now, Twi go out to the streets of Canterlot and tell 10 random strangers that your mother is not actually your birth mother , then ask them who they think your birth mother actually is bet you 8 will answer "
Duh"
on the other hand Celestia, come clean, like NOW please. You already stated that you were there when mama Twiligh took Sparkle in, so it stands to reason you would know who her birth parents were. Also mama Twilight knows ( and isnt too happy with you) and it seems that Shining Armor also knows that Celestia is Twilight's mom. Bet you anything Sparkle will demand that both of them tell her everything they know.![]()
I expected more from you than the tired idea of "she's my daughter", Heratic.
Your admittedly VAST readership doesn't excuse you from beating the same dead horse that at least a third of low-end fan fiction writers have touched upon. ![]()
Your talent is meant for far greater things.
Yeah you're right I definitely did the super boring thing that everyone else does
especially with that super saccharine happy ending
Well, ow. Celestia got owned. My emotions just got owned. This entire time I've been screaming "just tell her!" ;-;
Good story though, I hope it continues :D
So many feels...
Of course, you realize that this will just make the inevitable discovery and subsequent feelings of betrayal even worse.
Dear Mom,
First I find out I'm adopted, and then I find out I'm your DAUGHTER?!?![]()
WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME!?!
Your FAITHFUL STUDENT, Twilight Sparkle
This story doesn't really sit well with me, because it doesn't offer a change. It "just happens" and then Twilight has to accept it, but her life is still virtually the same. A detailed, more interesting version of a history textbook.
I don't know. It just... lacked that story feel. Also didn't like how the entire thing was revealed over something as random as alcohol.
Not liking nor disliking it.
This is extraordinarily deep. I'm with Salesman, I was all but shouting "TELL HER!" when I read the ending.
Well done, as usual.