Celestia is tired of being a ruler. She decides to go on vacation, leaving Luna in charge of... pretty much everything. Celestia expects her sister to take care of such things like raising the sun every morning or receiving letters from Twilight.
However, Luna is not happy about her new duties. She never really wanted to be the ruler of Equestria. To make the matter worse, Luna is actually clueless what to do... Will somepony help her? Will she find the way to make Celestia return to Canterlot?
Chapters (6)
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interesting.. will continue to read! there were some grammatical errors but nothing too bad.
Why is Luna so mean to Twilight?
Your writing style is simplistic. I find that somewhat grating, but I don't know if it's fair of me to object to it. The grammar is readable, but not good. You need a proofreader. Do you use Google Documents for drafting? I could do a bit of editorial work for you if you do. I don't like to leave comments listing errors. I'd rather mark the document up in private. The GDocs commenting feature is ideal for that.
a great concept, and the grammar was okay at least, the thing that bothers me is how out of character some of them were; mostly luna, celestia and shy.
1479490
Fluttershy was out of character??
Well, if you think so, okay but...
1479490>>1478874
Luna is just overwhelmed by the situation and the stress get the best out of her.
I should have written it in the first chapter though.
1479502
doesn't seem like fluttershy a whole lot, she's usually not expressing herself a whole lot and is usually very quiet. here she is expressing herself very vividly whilst screaming ("cried" also means screaming, especially when there is an exclamation mark in the sentence)
luna is overwhelmed, sure...but that's no reason to call twilight a lowley apprentice and peon, that sounds like something trixie would say. besides that; she's acting all high and mighty in pretty much every situation, again, something trixie would do.
what about celestia, it's like she just doesn't care at all. she even treats twilight's letters like a chore.
also, you should check out these two groups: link 1 link 2
1479531
But Fluttershy had her moments of screaming and expressing herself, so it's not that ooc, but okay, if you say so, it might be true.
About Celestia - she needed to shift into "trollestia" - otherwise she wouldn't have left Canterlot, right?
About Luna again - remember, she "just" returned from banishment - it's hard to get rid of old habits, especially if she got "promoted" to the higher status.
But I don't say you are not right - you're right, they are kinda ooc but in my opinion it's justified - at least a bit.
Trolestia had some damn good lines.
"I believe both of you will be fine"
1479120
Thanks a lot for your proofreading of the story!
1480736
I hope my efforts help! Never sure about that, especially with an author I haven't worked with before.
Best of luck to you, looking forward to chapter two.
After a while, the Moon was visible very well
This sentence should probably read:
After a while the moon could be clearly seen
1499886
thanks. corrected it
A short chapter today. I hope you like it.
Criticism/critique/feedback/whatever is welcomed!
The writing is kinda simplistic, but it's improving. No glaring errors this time around. Proofreaders are a great thing to have.
I'm going to give a quick example of what doesn't really work:
If she's smiling, you don't need to say that she's happy; it's pretty much implied by the smile. You can go two ways with this. Either coalesce the thing into a simple "Luna said, smiling proudly" or split it up into two kinds of happiness: "Luna said giddily, then proudly beamed at her skeptical audience."
Make every word in your story mean something; don't just add adjectives and adverbs to increase the word count.
1512999
Ok. I chose your first proposition.
Hurry up and figure it out Twilight before all of Equestria is doomed!
meh gusta....
I have a few question's one if this is in spike shipping shouldn't it have spike as a main character in the title page and two shouldn't it have romance as one of its tags?
1479531your twilight avatar looks demotic
Wat just happened?
MOAR BECAUSE MOAR!
Spike and luna best ship
So, here is the last chapter, guys. I hope you like it.
Please, rate the story if you haven't done this yet (and if it's, um, okay with you
) and write what you think about the story 
Also, The Griffin King is the best pony
Wait, Luna has control over stars, Sun is star, Luna has dominion over sun, right?
1556772
she doesn't have this in canon, right?
I think she only controls the Moon.
15568
Stars in her mane, and she controls the night, which depicts stars.
1556836
Well, she didn't have stars in her mane in the second episode. I think it's just for looks
and doesn't imply anything. In the 1st episode it was stated that Celestia raised the sun and Luna raised the Moon. I'll stick to this version 
1556862
She lost almost all of her power in that episode
It did not matte thatr she had never harmed anypony.
Just a typo I spotted. It shoud be "matter that"
1556879
okie dokie
I don't wanna destroy your vision of the show 
but still I think Luna controlling all the stars would be just too powerful and make Celestia redundant.. You can make Luna redundant but you can't make the RULER redundant
1556893
Thanks. How did this "r" go there?
1556900
What if all along Celestia was just a cover story, and Luna has been controlling everything all along under the guise of younger sister, while Celestia is just an entity filled with a small fraction of Luna's power in order to keep up the pretense of innocence, while Twilight Sparkle is actually being taught by Luna, making Twilight the Faithful Student of Luna, therefore dissolving the pretenses of Luna having not adapted to modern speech through the current mannerisms of the puppet known as "Celestia", which means that Princess Luna would not be suspected due to her supposed absence on the moon. INCEPTION
1556944
Well, you got an idea for a story
1557022
Oh god yes!!!!!
Hey there... again. This story you lead me to was like watching a weird train wreck: Sleazy Trollestia the Lazy, Super Suck-up Spike, Incompetent Luna the Meanie and the Mane Six acting like..... themselves actually.(I did not expect that.)
Overall:
?
Oh Lord, that was a good one.
You Sir and/or Madam are a comedy goldmine and I love you for it.
This was a perfect way to end my evening, thank you very much for sharing this work with us, have a great night/day.
1819623
Thank you. I'm glad you like the story
Very funny star. Though Luna was a bit of a jerk at some parts.
You destroyed a whole city for a joke?... Wow just... wow
I don't know. I remember it was you the one who told us to simply call you Luna. And in any case this joke is not funny anymore. Please stop it.
What's with the Celestia's serious speech about Thanatology? I thought this was a comedy.
Plus: Celestia had sex with a character that doesn't even have a real name, cuz she felt jealous about her sister?... Pitufu.
2026950
Well, she changed her behavior to her old "self".
2027284
Well, comedy might have some serious parts from time to time, but I understand you didn't like that part.
1916443
Thanks for your comments. I hope you enjoyed the story anyway. Cheers!
2058983
Yes it was funny and i did enjoy it a lot. Is just that after the firts half of the story it became a bit repetitive.
But it was a fun.
I reviewed your story tonight you can find it here
Yeah, maybe you shouldn't play with the moon, Luna... It does sorta control the tides...
Oh... We're shipping Spike and Luna now? .......Please no...
I don't ship it but Luna ending the date with a kiss on the cheek is super cute!!
Needs end " marks.
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static.fjcdn.com/large/pictures/a7/8f/a78fa4_2337236.jpg
a clock
___________
The moon dance was totally worth it. Reminds me of this fic.
End " marks after Anyway
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That was one of the best things i've read in months. I really felt the story could have kept going though with Luna battling to rule Equestria while also trying to one up Celestia in love life via post.
2012.