It's been ten years since the end of her first career, and she had long since accepted it. At first she blamed all, especially the mare that upstaged her and exposed her as a fraud. It was for the better though. Now she was known as a mare of myth: The Mist Mare. Wherever she went a magic mist followed. She was now a protector. Everypony had heard of her now, and everypony respected her now...so why didn't she care? The fame and glory were all she once cared about, but now it seemed like a hollow victory of a contest that didn't exist. Throughout all the training, all the injuries she suffered, all the fights, she didn't feel as if it mattered that they loved her. She always appreciated it, but she could go without it. She contemplated the reason why, and finally found her answer. Now it was time to return to where it all began, where she would find the mare who started her on this path. It was time to show her what she'd become. This would be: Trixie's Triumphant Return!
Cover art by SpeccySY.deviantart.com he's a great artist and one of my favorites.
I usually stay away from the Tragedy tag, but I was curious. This was a very unique take on what happened to Trixie. I never would have expected this. I'm glad I read it. Excellent work!
Well, I'm not sure where the tragedy tag comes in. That usually means a bad thing, and except for
Trixie now being a bad ass and fighting different creatures, I don't see it.
Still, this pretty good.
If you had a statue this would be written under it:
Read my story, stand in awe.
(This is a reference to Ben hogan's statue (a famous golf player) under whoos statue it is written: watch my swing, stand in awe. Just a FYI)
1450156 What creative praise
Thank you
ooh will there be a side story where they trade stories of their lives. I know Rarity wouldnt mind a little gossip, maybe they can have a spa day and Trixie can get pampered like she most likely needs.
i didnt even see the tragedy tag, i just read it for the trixie
A good story... I just never saw Trixie as needing to change all that much. She did show genuine courage fighting the Ursa. And I blame the Mane cast for the problems with her magic show. But overall, good tale here.
1450500 As fun as that sounds it was just a one-shot, but I like encouraging people to take an interest in writing. If that's something you'd like to write then I'll put a link to it in the description.
Great story for something so simple and short. Truly worth the read. Thank you.
I understand that you wrote this before the "Magic Duel" aired, so I won't say anything about being non-canon.
First things first: The idea of Trixie becoming a hero seems very unlikely to me, although nice. And I'm not talking about her character's development throughout the story, I'm talking about the overall concept of Trixie turning from zero to Hero. Trixie is not a fighter, she's more of a... trickster, a rouge. Arcane trickster, if you like. This makes her kind of out of character. She no longer refers to herself in third person, it's just not the Trixie we know.
Those convenient apperances of a manticore throughout the story have been bugging me, there is a technical term for that, invented by Grigori Gorin - The Piano in the Bushes. Illustration:
pln-pskov.ru/pictures/111019125828.jpg
Imagine, two men are having a stroll at the park:
Well, I can see how you wanted to keep your story short, so I suppose it was necessary. The fighting scenes remind me of some anime, I can't quite recall the name.
Bottom line is, the story is nice and solid, although a bit naive if you ask me. It lacks a little something. That's why you didn't get any dislikes, but not enough upvotes.
2100682 Yeah, this was done before magic duel, and that episode sort of breaks head-canon here, but I don't see much need to change it. If you look at it in some ways it still works as is, but I digress.
The main problem you pointed out, just how different she is from the normal Trixie, is actually the point of the story in a way. The reason I wrote this...well it actually started with the cover image and as with all my ideas it evolved into something more as I went along, which of course means I started over a couple times.
Anyways, the whole point of the story is not just how Trixie returns to Ponyville in triumph as the title suggests, but it's also there to show that redemption can be claimed by anyone in time. Keep in mind this is a full ten years later, a lot of things can change in someone during that time. I understand how that concept can seem out there, but then again everything with Trixie was a bit out there to begin with wasn't it?
On a side note, a good friend of mine has a saying: "Redemption is only for those who deserve it". I prefer to think that anyone who's done wrong can deserve redemption, but only if they do earn it.
Also, as per the convenient appearances of the manticores, the first one was to get the story started, the second one was...well I admit that was just having an excuse for Trixie to show off when Twilight showed up. Why a manticore the second time? Well anything bigger would have taken to long and would have required an unneeded fight seen, and anything smaller would have been done before Twilight got there. I couldn't really think of a way to fix that, so I kept it as it. Not everything can be perfect, even to the one writing the story.
Again, side note, the first one was also what got the story started to begin with. Like I said the whole story was inspired by the cover art image.
As per seeming like the fight seen was from some sort of anime, well I can easily explain that too. I don't know if you had a particular one in mind, but I love anime. Bleach, dbz, Naruto, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, a little Cowboy Bebop every now and then, fucking Inuyasha (sue me, I like old japanese culture and demons...and those japanese schoolgirl outfits I'll admit), and a few other shows that aren't actual anime, but similar, like Voltron Force and Sym-bionic Titan. Whenever I write a fight scene it should go without saying that it may seem anime-ish. Sorry if that bugs you, I can't help that one.
Well, thanks for the constructive review. I enjoy criticism as long as it's well thought out, structured, and definitive. Maybe comical to a point if a good critic can manage. I hope you'll review my other stories as I start getting them out. I enjoy having someone with a good head on their shoulders to bounce back and forth with.
This story has been reviewed by: The Equestrian Critics Society
Story title: The Triumphant Return
Author: DragonOverlord2012
Review by: BronyWriter
A rather interesting Trixie story that takes her in a rarely seen and unique direction after her embarrassment at the hooves of Twilight after the Ursa Minor incident. It’s a decently well written story, if a little clunky and random at times, that is definitely worth a look.
Full review
Final Score: 7.5/10
Trixie learns the value of humility. Awesome.
Any chance of a sequel where she learns the true value of friendship (or teamwork)?
3107042 If anything I might intigrate the canon of this story to be included in another one later on, but I don't think this one will have a direct sequel. All is open in my mind though.
Trixie is still nothing to Twilight though. That's impressive for a Trixie writer to not fanboy Trixie into being Twilight's equal
3148660 Actually I'm not too big a fan of Trixie, so that's probably why. I just chose to give Trixie dignity and self respect.
This was good, although the two manticore fights were a bit much, especially the first one which seemed to drag on longer than it needed to to establish who Trixie was after ten years. I feel like you could have reworked the first part to build up who she is with either a shorter fight against something squishier like a cockatrice or taken it in a totally different direction with an outside perspective on the Mist Mare (possibly told through conversation between Spike, Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, and/or Rainbow) and leave who she is more vague until an expanded conversation with Twilight and possibly some of the others who were at the show.
That said, I really liked what you did with Trixie here and would definitely be interested in seeing some further exploration into her life and what took her from the show to the amulet (if you decide to incorporate it) to this and possibly beyond.
Here's the shortest review I've ever did:
Mate, that was awesome.
Here, take your like, fav, a mustache
and a trixie 
.
*That* is a interesting take on a reforming Trixie - after the Ponyville's fiasco, she traines herself to be able to deal with the monsters that she claimed to be able to face.... and becomes a kind of superheroine in the process
.
It would be interesting see more adventures of the Mist Mare
I liked this story. it shows how someone CAN change over time. I like this new, and improved Trixie. I would like to see more of her. Trixie has changed, and come into her own. she seems a bit mysterious, but also courageous. she has become a wandering hero, with a new responsible demeanor. its still kind of sad that shes still a loner. I would like to see her make some friends, and have a sense of having a place to call home. I could see her becoming a great asset to the military, as she seems like a weathered soldier in this story.
*3 years later*
I know what you did there
5730836
Check out Misadventures of Trixie.
Well, it's not exactly the Mist Mare Trixie, but she's still awesome in it.