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Princess Twilight's visit to the Apples for Hearth's Warming has gotten much more difficult as the sole ruler of Equestria.


Written for ROBCakeran53 as part of Jinglemas 2020! Find out more at our group!


EDIT: #3 in the feature box on Christmas 2020. Thanks everyone!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 21 )

Royal Guard who actually sound even half way competent? Digging that. I still don't buy into whatever people are over dosing on, in thinking that half horn red and black character from the Movie is a good fit for the Guard.

That's just me though. I do love the story.

10596842
I'm gonna assume that's a figurative "red and black", not literal. And considering she was already a commander in a military, and can kick more ass than any guard we ever saw in the show.

ROBCakeran53
Moderator

Oh. This. This.

Was fantastic!

You managed to incorporate so much into a 5k story, I was left grinning at every word. I'm a sucker for slice of life, and then you showing us the transition of time through technological advancements really sold it. "New" electric lights in the caverns. Telegraph machines, and it just... it was good.

While I've not read the book this was inspired by, I really loved the security aspect of the guard. How Twilight wished for things of before, the comparisons and contrasts to Celestias rule. Tempest Shadow!

And let's not forget the characters I requested. Big Mac and Twilight. You obviously did fantastic with Princess Twilight, but in a low key aspect, Big Mac was also fantastic. The small hint of past feelings, showing his son and the love to Sugar Belle, and the few moments they get to talk about smart stuff. Smart yet reserved Big Mac? Hell to the yes!

I can safely say I was grinning ear to ear for this entire story. Characterization, the scene changes, even the OC's.

You took two characters who you could have easily slapped an AU tag on and made it shippy, and blew it out of the water. It's within canon, and it's just... So good.

Thank you. So, so much. This is easily a story that not only myself, but many others will enjoy for years to come.

Merry Christmas, my friend, and I hope you are as happy with your gift as I was with mine.

10596849
Here's the thing though. Yeah, Tempest was a commander. And a good one at that. But that doesn't mean she would want to continue to be. And I can't see anypony forcing her too either. Least of all Twilight.

And no, I meant that literally. Tempest is a red and black unicorn, and does tick off a few boxes. Tragic backstory? Check. Edgy design? Check. OP as fuck? Double check.

Being a unicorn though.

ROBCakeran53
Moderator

10596861
I forgot to add, working in aviation, I fucking *loved* the small part where they are out at dark looking over a list with a red light.

10596879
Thanks. It's nice to have the details appreciated.

This was really interesting, and pretty awesome seeing all the different races as guards. Showing how Equestria’s been growing and all.
It’s almost kinda sad of how much prep had to go into a simple holiday get together, where back in the old days where Twi could just turn up and relax.
Great work

All in all an excellent one shot. Not much I can say that other reviewers haven't already said better, but the showing of how much Equestria has changed over the course of the past few decades was some really great detail. And, yeah, I could certainly see where, with the improved communications, it would take an insane amount of prep time just for a simple holiday get-together. I especially sympathized with Twilight when she was thinking about understanding why Celestia retired as soon as she thought Twilight could handle it. Of course, if the prep time was this crazy for a trip to Sweet Apple Acres, imagine how rough it would be to prepare for a trip to the Crystal Empire, or Sunset Shimmer's adopted universe. And, speaking of Sunset, I bet she's probably glad SHE is "only" a high school principal by now. Yeah, it's still really hard work, but at least simple holiday get togethers with her friends and their families actually STAY simple.

“I will have to make time to read it.” Everycreature present hoped that she didn’t mean that literally.

Indeed. Considering how she controls the sun and the moon her making it so a day has 25 hours so that she has free time to read is a possibility after all. :trollestia:

This was highly enjoyable. Good work. :twilightsmile:

This makes my insides liquify into a bucket-sized assortment of joy-goop.

Not quite sure what i want to think about that.
While generally warm, this story gives off a bit of awkward feeling. Also a bit of regret and sadness.
As planned, probably.

Reading this brought me nothing, though. I don't feel any idea behind it. I can logically tell the idea, but i can't feel it. Just a normal slice of life is all i can feel. No morale, no lesson.
Just a bit of warmth.

10596862
Yeah, her colors aren't a perfect match for the stereotypical red-and-black but they're clearly meant to be close.

Twilight’s eyes lit up. “Bell, book, candle! It’s all the ingredients for a summoning ritual.”

You want demons? That's how you get demons :twilightsmile:

CCC

“Well, not quite,” replied her jacket.

:rainbowlaugh: Bwah-ha-ha-ha-haaaa!

10600294
So that's actually the only candle mention in the fic. Twilight doesn't use one in the ritual.

Some possible explanations:
1) Twilight was quoting an idiom about summoning, not anything to do with what she was actually doing.
2) Twilight substituted her horn for the candle, using improvements in technique made by unicorns since the book was written.
3) The alchemical reagents in the chalk made the candle unnecessary.
4) The author was in a rush to finish the ending due to scheduling difficulties.

I would like to know the Artist too :D

10600666
For the image? I put a link to the source in with the image, but I'll also link it in this comment.

Yeah give a job for two princesses to a single one, I am sure it will work just fine!

Grinning like an idiot the entire time. Lovely work.

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