• Member Since 13th Mar, 2017
  • offline last seen May 3rd

StatiZkyZ


AKA Le Durgen, a novice horse writer

E

The war is over.

The war that Twilight never wanted to start.

The war that made Twilight attack one of her friends.

Now, there's only one thing left to do, but it's the hardest part of the war.


Update: Dang it, might've submitted the wrong chapter 2 :applejackconfused: . It's now updated, featuring less eye burning writing errors.

Surprise short fic, I suppose? Something fun for me to write.

Inspired by a certain Youtube comment on a certain Youtube video~

Warning, if you have read chapter 1, and liked it that way, stay away from chapter 2. It might turn your experience upside down.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 18 )

I like this sillier ending

Since it's Rarity on the other end, somepony finally let all of the attention and praise finally go to her head and she declared herself the ruler of some upstart, and woefully pathetic, nation. Which by the sounds of it, quite a few ponies joined.

And Twilight just showed them why you don't fuck with Equestria, and win. The hard way, granted. But still. If Rarity was as smart as she thinks she is, she would've known this was always going to be the final result.

... Meh. It is funnier. But this just kinda renders Chapter 1 pointless. Now, if this was just all in one chapter, with this funnier side being what was really going on, and everything before it just in the game, then it works.

Now it just feels tacked on for no reason.

10518592
Well, I did put a warning there for a reason :derpytongue2:

I did consider putting it in the first chapter, but I'm not sure if it'll flow well. Plus, I don't want risk someone scrolling down too low and just butchered the experience.

How is this a crossover?

Oh god, I needed this.

"I forgot to save, didn't I!?"

Relax Twi, it has autosave.

This entire thing feels like a civ reference. I'm guessing it probably is.

That first chapter is really good as a one off, but I'm really glad this one exists. I dont know how many sessions I've ruined by not saving.

56

Seeing a lot of tense mismatch issues here. Would read a lot better if they were cleaned up.

10519582
One of the main experiences of playing Civ is forgetting to save :derpytongue2: Other then having a warmongering AI for no reason, that is.

This story desperately needs someone to go through it and fix the grammatical errors.

10519603
In the first chapter? I swear I cleaned them up... Can you point some for me? It would be greatly appreciated.

10519692
Second chapter should be fixed now! I might've submitted the wrong version :applejackconfused:

Princess... is she still worthy of that title after this war?

Is that a Doctor Who reference?

10526086
Oh? Did I made an unintentional reference?~

Honestly, no, I have next to no knowledge of Doctor Who :applejackconfused:

10519789
Well... the tenses are all over the place and there are a couple of typo.

I'm guessing this is inspired by CIV, what Rarity said definitely sounds like what a CIV AI says when they're defeated

(Ahhhh, I love things like this!

Games! All of the drama, none of the actual tears and heartache! Let loose the dogs of war! Virtually.)

Login or register to comment