• Member Since 3rd Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Sep 26th, 2021

Togashi


Just a worn out writer from a bygone age. Don't mind me, I'm just passing through.

Comments ( 116 )

:ajsleepy: Not bad, waiting for the next one

I'd have thought vinyl would have bitch slapped Octavia back. :rainbowhuh:

First
nice story so far... kinda wondering where the drug thing will go but still going to keep reading.

I found this funny in some areas. Like how blunt Vinyl was with her question... :rainbowlaugh:

Beautiful... simply beautiful.

As soon as the words magenta came up....
Word of advice... Don't mention Vinyl's eyes....
Ever.

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Don't worry, the type of people concerned with her eye color will have far more to worry about by the end of this series.

Daaaaang octavia, who knew she'd be this kinda gal? It's always either the sophiticated/shy/nerdy ones who likes that.

Kinky. However I do so enjoy reading different fics with Octavia ans Vinyl because the roles are always changing.

This is bloody fucking brilliant. A different take on the characters coupled with a beautiful writing style makes this one of the better stories posted recently. I probably would've called it the best in a while, but you know, Past Sins…

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I wouldn't touch OCs with a ten foot pole, so not being in the same grade as Past Sins is a huge compliment.

Another chapter should go up this week.

Took a while for this chapter, my apologies.

Fancy Pants is such a dick. Also: ‘Shut up brain.’ Vinyl thought. ‘We’re going in.’

Amazing as usual.

The story is getting darker and darker and I really like it! The relationship Vinyl and Octavia have in this fic is so... different. You manage to somehow ship them , yet make them almost hate each other. But we all know that there is only a thin line between love and hate.
Also I like the concept of Octavia using Vinyl this way. She found her and got her a well paid job, this seems pretty nice of her, but the job is so hard she can't do it without drugs which Octavia provides for her... She really is a wicked mare (...and a bitch)
Though I was a bit disappointed by the Fancy Pants scene. I was hoping he would hurt her more. (Way more)

Also:
- At the beginning of the chapter where vinyl looks at Octavia you wrote" Vinyl averted her gaze from her the earth pony" either a comma is missing, or you wrote to many words.
- In the scene where Vinyl enters Fancy's carriage suddenly you wrote "Hoity frowned for a moment" As long as we wasn't in the carriage too you should change that.

This story has taken a depressing turn. Not like a sad, emotional kind of depressing like the end of "My Little Dashie", but a fucked up kind of depressing. I'm really liking it so far, keep it up!

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Fixed both errors, thanks.

Though I was a bit disappointed by the Fancy Pants scene. I was hoping he would hurt her more. (Way more)

This is a good point, although I want to keep Octavia as the main antagonist. I'll think on it.

I feel so bad for vinyl considering she's been tavi's sex slave. Also, I have a feeling this story won't have a good ending, just saying.

This is kinda scary. Vinyl's trapped. She cant leave or she will live in a shit apartment and if she stays she's a living toy. :ajsleepy:

This is some fucked up stuff here. I'm really not sure what to think about it, I know that I shouldn't like it... but... Damn, I just don't know.

Really great story so far. Hurry up with the writing.

Octavia a drug supplier, Fancy Pants a sadic and drug abuse and rape?!

http://starfox64.baldninja.com/wav/fal-horr.wav

This has turned out to be a very interesting read. I really can't wait to read more of this and where you plan on taking it. I don't normally go for dark pony fics, but this is just too interesting to ignore. I hope you write an update soon.

At this rate Vinyl will be dead from sexual exhaustion within the week. Does Fancy really want her at his get-together, or just a disposable fuck-toy?

Sounds like she was suffering from withdrawl symptoms at the start, with the muted senses and shaking. Those must be some addictive drugs Octavia has.

At first, i was kind of disappointed when I realized you were putting Faithful on hiatus, but woah, I think I like this one even more.
And it's always nice to see B.E. Ellis allusions!

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I actually watched American Psycho during points of this chapter, and have read the novel in the past. Initially I was going to be harsher on Vinyl in this scene, but I changed my mind, as I have plans for the next chapter and didn't want her too damaged.

Very impressive catch.

This is starting to get kinda.....hardcore is the only thing that come to mind.:derpyderp1:

I'm startin to get scared for vinyl, that girl needs to rest up like pronto.

I love this story! It's just makes you feel a bit uncomfortable while reading it, but I thinks that's more an artistic skill rather than a negative. Please continue! :pinkiehappy:

There is a lot oh clopping honing on but this is one oh the best stories I've ever red (I know bad grammar ) it includes the darker sides of any world that exicted and plaza hurry up I want to know what happens next:rainbowdetermined2:

I feel heartache reading this, poor Vinyl. I cry when I read what happens to her.

Well... I don't even want to know what I just read. But.... No LSD :moustache:

Damn, I was not expecting things to get this screwed up this fast. Not that they didn't deserve it, but, just wow, one hell of a spell. This continues to get more interesting, so you've got my support. :pinkiehappy:

Well fuck that went from dark to black as fuck.

:yay: I have to say things got out of control and unlike the previous chapters no " clopping" are you changing your style:duck:

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Well we had a good run, a regular maelstrom of clop for a bit there, but it fit the more manic pace I was setting. We'll see how things play out in the last chapter.

Holy shit that was dark and hard to read without getting creeped out. Good job!

There's something I don't get. It seems like it wasn't the first time they took a pony to make it a slave, or I missed a part.
And no one before ever tried to escape ? Why did Vinyl, a random pony with a not-so-good magic (she's not as good as Twilight), totally on drugs, managed to barely escape, and not the previous ones ?
It looked like it was the first time they faced a pony who escaped.

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I alluded to it a couple times, but Fancy Pants usually abducts foals, as it's much easier to train them into obedient minions. When he states they won't need anything else from Octavia to keep Vinyl drugged, he more or less is saying he either intended to kill Vinyl or break her mentally, whichever came first. So he abducts adults when it suits his needs, but they don't live long since they are liabilities. All the adults at his party, for instance, are all guests.

When she is in her drugged state, her emotions are extremely heightened and she has no real sense of restraint. Instead of bothering to focus, she just let it all out, like she had previously on Octavia. So you get these incredibly unpredictable, powerful results. Eventually this could be very dangerous for the user indeed.

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Well, I know that Fancy Pants used to do this with foals, and for them it was quite normal they become minions. But the difference was that Vinyl is a mare, she was only in contact with Fancy Pants since a few days and it may have been risky from Fancy, she may not be so obedient.
But yeah, considering that Vinyl is totally drugged, it can make sense that she casts a powerful spell and stuff.
The only part I don't get is why he never encountered a stallion/mare like Vinyl before, totally drugged, we can see that he didn't seem to take any precautions.

But thanks for the details.

This was amazing :yay: I can't wait to see what happens next. This finally got me to register :derpytongue2:, haha.

Magnificent. I simply cannot think of any truly meaningful criticism I could give. The early chapters are a perfect mix of boneriffic and disturbing, and the most recent one...fucking hell.

An this:

Don't just stare at it, eat it.

Made my day. Made my week.

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Dang, did I lose power here cuz this story just got dark as hell!!! I don't normally read dark stories, but this one is so exciting/messed up to read!

Things escalated quickly! Wtf was all that? Octavia decided to sell her lovely little unicorn to death right after selling her for a contract?

(Joke) Alt. Title: Vinyl And Octavia Experience A Picardy Third
It's an orgasm joke. Heh. Heh. Heh.

Oh god... :pinkiesad2:

Still no [Tragedy] ? :rainbowhuh:

Well, that was a dark and sad ending.

I would wonder what happens when Octavia runs out of drugs, assuming that she has had to cut off ties with her old life, but no doubt Pinkie Pie has some good connections

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Good point, I guess this does end rather tragic...didn't really think about it.

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