~ Roses and Thorns is all about one pony named Rose. Rose is a very delicate and demure pony. She is mature, elegant, and is also very smart. Her parents do not have much money, so the mare goes out to seek treasure to save her family. But she doesn't just go alone, she brings along a friend, Zach. Zach is a very smart, strong, and also mature pony. He is going to help Rose. Find out if Rose will succeed or will she end up in the thorns. Find out in the heart racing adventure of Roses and Thorns. ~
Chapters (5)
Good job! I love it! Do you possibly need an editor to make the process of writing easier for you? because i would be more than happy to help!
Why is this complete?
Kind of confusing, a bit fast, and I'm used to changing paragraphs with dialogue.
I'll give this a 3.5
Oh btw, FIRST!
71353 Lol, thanks, best comment I got in my entire life of writing so far, :D
Not to mention some minor spelling errors.
"Right your name at the top and put the date too"
>>TheDangboy Thanks, but I think I have things under control. :)
71358 Wait, how's that a spelling error?
Okay, not first.
Anyway, it's the effort that counts. Keep on writing, you'll get better over time.
Trust me, I know.
71358 Wait, how's that a spelling error? I put a period at "Alright. Now class."
71363
It should be:
"Write your name...etc."
Unless you mean something like:
"Right, your name on the top...etc."
71364 Uh..... okay. Well, I am just starting. But my friends believe I am an excellent writer. I just need to use better words and sort of, well, rough it up a bit; but I do like my story. :) So far anyway.
71369
As long as your happy with it, that's all that matters.
I'm not saying you should blow off people trying to give you advice though....
71367 ......Okay......
71372 Lol, don't worry. I wont But, I have been getting a lot of advice on my acc's
Gets sort of annoying if you know what I mean.
Why... does it say complete? Is this really all of it?
71383 Oopsie,
sorry. I pressed the wrong button.
71383 I'll change it. :)
71386
*phew*
Good. I'm curious to see what happens next....
71391 Well, I'll ether make the next part tonight or tomorrow, there's really no rush. I mean, I have a whole 2 and a half weeks off for christmas break. And it's SEW AWESUM
71395 Uh, well I did do it that way,
71396
You lucky pony. Mine starts next friday. Oh the agonizing wait! Nah, not really.
People like you make me sad... in myself, I WANT to write, I just don't have the initiative to
Oh well, it gives me more time to plan. Also, nice story, just need to fix the little things really lol
71434 Lol, thanks it's sort of one of my first times writing. Also, if you want some help, I'd be glad to.
Hm... I like the concept... just... sort of lacks detail in some areas. The 'goon's at the last bit, huh? They didn't seem too scared and the 'goon's didn't sound so bad (Other then using them to find the amulets [ Which is only touched upon?]) Anyways, can't wait to read more xD
71425
You too huh? Oh well. At least it's coming soon right?
71450 Lol, everyone is really determined to be particular and picky about every detail
XD
71455 Actually, just made it.
71457 xD Can't help it lol, I just want to see other's who took the time to actually write and post their ideas get better since all I got is ten pages of notes on characters and ideas
I do like the story though, don't get me wrong, I just like putting in my two bits is all
71465 Lol, I wasn't fighting with you, don't worry. Well, thanks :D
71468 People like you inspire me to try and write, so what can I say
71472 Aww, thanks. Woohoo, you rock.
71477 Just want to say thanks again, I'm finally trying to get chapter one finished and uploaded cause of you
71547 I'm touched, really. I, I think I'm gonna cry
xD
71425
hey, i know how ya feel.
my weekend's gonna suck though
71772 Really? Well, I'm getting a 2 and a half week winter break. But anyway, how is your weekend gonna suck? Or be suckish?
The transition is a bit off, but hooray, another chapter (The mud fight made me laugh a bit [Also, my first chapter should be up today
])
72497 Well, thats awesome :) YAY
4.0 star's isn't bad for one of my first stories. Thanks
four projects for next week, and all from the same class
73977 Well, that sucks.
74471 xD true,
Needs so more details, this chapter was basicly dialogue only...
76042 I know, I was a bit lazy with this chapter.
76060 It doesn't have to have daily updates, take some time and have fun
76096 I know, I get a little bored tho. xD
Ok guys, few reminders on this 1. It's canceled. 2. I am no longer playing on Bella. and 3. MY NEW ACC IS THIS DON'T EXPECT THIS STUFF NO MORE! K?! That's all