Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season2
By TDR
Ponyville Cymric-fidential,
Chapter 1
[Ponyville school house]
An angry looking purple scaled individual with a small mane comb sitting under his nose slammed his fists to the desk and growled.
“GET ME PICTURES OF SPIDER MARE!!” Spike bellowed sending a number of the foals in the room into giggling fits at the reference.
“Ehh, I prefer Batmare beyond.” Sweetiebelle shrugged.
“Jokes aside, what are we gonna do Spike?”” Applebloom pouted.
“With the paper? Really I don't think any one expects much more than a Namby Pamby foals paper.” Spike sighed.
“Yeah well he left last semester. “ Scootaloo pointed out.
“Ehh I guess... Hmm, okay, Feather Weight you go out and take photos of everything that seems interesting, every pony else scatter about town and see if you can find anything interesting going on. This is Ponyville, there's got to be something, monster attacks, bake sales, chaos deities. Something.”
“Right!” the gathered foals chorused and rushed out of the room.
[Several hours later.]
Spike raised an eyebrow looking down at the photos. He then looked over at Feather Weight who shrugged.
“You know I was joking when I said bring me pictures of Spider-Mare right?” Spike asked.
“Yep.” Feather Weight replied with a small nod.
“So how did you manage to bring me pictures, of what looks like a real Spider-Mare then?” Spike questioned looking at the photos of a pony dressed as Spider-Mare swinging around town and standing on walls.
“Pinkie Pie.” Feather Weight explained.
“Ahh okay, we'll put them on page four and title it Random Pinkie corner.”Spike nodded.” Lets see we have the weather forecast from Rumble, upcoming sales at Barnyard Bargains and a fashion report from Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.....”
“We also have pictures and story of the Crusaders doing something stupid with tree sap.” Diamond Tiara smiled.
“That's not news, that's a Wednesday.” Spike shook his head.” Trust me on that one.”
Spike looked up as the other Crusaders trotted in the door. “Hope you guys got something, because right now the only thing I have for the front page, is either pictures of Snips and Snails getting stuck together with gum, or Rahs going off about a new play that came out and how badly it was done.”
“Ah told you interviewing yer brother was a bad idea. Ah can't even under stand what he's saying an ah ken tell it's got more drama than Rarity with a hair outta place.” Applebloom snorted.
“He just got back from Canterlot, I was hoping he at least saw something.” Spike waved his arms in the air. “Ehh I can dump it on page eight, most of it's just explaining who he and I are to the new comers in town so the Guard stops getting called. It's gotten old already.”
“Well ah got a good one fer yah then. Ah was gonna go talk to Granny Smith, cause ah'm sure she's got some interesting stories, but then ah figured ah'd go for some pony no one knows about.” Applebloom grinned.” Ah got an interview with Zecora.”
Spike blinked as a few of the other foals in the room muttered rather impressed. All of them were around when everyone in town was still freaking out over her, and the few appearances since then did little to alleviate the mystery of the forest dwelling Zebra.
Applebloom handed Spike her notes and he looked them over with interest.
“Let's see, born in Bay-ston, studied alchemy in Maresachusetts institute of technology? Three degrees? Spent six years in the Zebralands learning from the few tribes that remained. Co-wrote the book 'Supernaturals' is currently regarded as the foremost expert on the flora of the Everfree Forest. “ Spike whistled. “What's this that's marked out here at the bottom?”
“Errr she kinda let slip she was dating some pony, but asked me not ta pass that on.” Applebloom stated.
“Huh, kinda looks like it said Miss Cheerilee.” Spike squinted at the paper.
“Hehe yeah funny that.” Applebloom muttered.
“I got better than that.” Sweetiebelle squeaked.
“You interviewed Princess Luna.” Spike answered.
“I interviewed Pri...... oh you know.” Sweetiebelle pouted.
“She uses my living room as a teleport pad, so yeah I know.” Spike sighed.” Still more ponies would want to know about her. So it's a toss up between Applebloom and Sweetie getting front page.” Spike hummed to himself.
“Not so fast!” Scootaloo shouted, and slapped down a random stack of papers on the desk.
“Do I wanna know?” Spike asked looking at the mess, already feeling a headache coming on from trying to decipher Scootaloo's writing.
“This is the best story every, pure gold, front page material.” Scootaloo crowed.
“Oh please, you probably just interviewed Rainbow Dash or something.” Diamond Tiara scoffed. “As if any one would care what SHE does.”
The other crusaders and Silver Spoon instinctively moved between Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara ready to stop Scootaloo from going after Diamond Tiara for insulting her idol.
Rather than take offense as expected however, Scootaloo didn't even respond to Diamond Tiara's crack. Scootaloo simply smiled at her. The effect was more than enough to make the pink filly step back.
“Really cause if any of the other newspapers are any indication, plus how every one acted a month or so ago, I'd say news about Rainbow Dash is what every one wants.” Scootaloo's grin didn't falter. “Particularly news about Rainbow Dash and her new colt friend Prince Blueblood.”
Spike and the rest of the Foal Free Press newsroom stared at the orange pegasus filly for a moment. Generally every pony was in shock, though Applebloom and Sweetiebelle were pretty much of the opinion that even a broken clock was right twice a day, and Scootlaoo's obsession had finally struck the correct time. Spike on the other claw was wondering if the orange filly was really as clueless as she seemed to be.
“So front page?” Ink Blot asked as he looked over to his printer.
Spike nodded.” And raise the price to five bits.”
[ Elsewhere]
“Do you see this?!” a Harlequin green furred and Mikado yellow maned unicorn stallion snorted waving the paper in the air.
“Yeah, who knew that Princess Luna mained The Bounty Hunter in Smash.” A snow white furred and golden poppy yellowed maned unicorn stallion responded as he flipped through his own copy of Foal Free Press.
“Not that you idiot, this!” The first stallion shoved an article on page eight in front of the second stallion.
“Err what about it? It's just a review for a bad play.”
“What do you mean what about it!?! Look at the first part! This is madness, they are forcing a baby dragon to do menial labor in a library. And this... Moon Dog or what ever they have him on stages preforming for ponies amusement. This is barbaric and uncalled for. These animals deserve to be with their own kind, free and wild like nature intended not slaves to the whims of ponies!”
“Sooo what are we going to do about it?” the second stallion blinked.
“It's time to show them how wrong it is to treat animals like this. Go get everyone else. It's time Ponies for the Ethical Treatment of Animals goes on a little road trip to this... Ponyville...”
Oh God… PETA.
So either Twilight or Princess Luna will rip them a new one.
PETA... there's a version of them in every universe, isn't there?
PETA ruins everything.
Change my mind.
The pure gold line of this chapter. Looks like the only day in the week without disaster would be Saturday.
Now I can earn more bits for my snack.
Hey, I am working to earn bits. Unless you would pay me for doing nothing, I will say back off.
How can these guys take Rahs to be with 'his own kind'? Do they actually know where the Moon Dog live?
Trixie has an urge to call upon Ursa Minor to stomp on these idiots for trying to take Fuzzy from me.
Err... us ponies are animal too... I mean.
oh boy i can´t wait for the next chapter !😊
PETA.... I give them 3 hours till they say hi to Dr.Choppy
9512067 VERY appropriate pic
peta is like greenpeace, if you ever listen to them they have no foot to stand on. Mainly because they shot it, with a shotgun. there is no foot left
welp, i can say for serten that PETA will not get to our versions idiotcy
So, how long until PETA tries to euthanize Spike and Rahs, and then Twilight and Luna euthanize the entire PETA?
>PETA
9512070
And failing that 4 hrs still they meet the pointy end of an enraged fire elemental (can't remember if twilight is listed as such in this verse), a one way trip via dragon fire to cantalot and/or having majority of there magic "eaten" by rahs the king of melodrama
i can't wait to see if the paparazzi hunter licenses allow them to deal with obnoxious protesters who are soon to be sorely mistaken.
I did NOT expect this. Bravo!
YES lets tell RAHS because ponies are taking advantage of him he can no longer preform on stage. Also tell Spike he can't help Rarity or Twilight because he's a baby dragon I'm sure this will go over so WELL
The people from peta won't last long in ponyville if they came on a Tuesday.
Did you see the southpark Peta episode?
9512056
I don't have enough popcorn for this level of shenanigans!
No joke, I have an IRL grudge against PETA for some they pulled in my hometown. Can’t wait to see how this blows up.
Please tell me peta gets there ass kicked.
9512070
No one is that dumb.
It will only take Luna one hour to notice.
And half an hour to use it.
great chapter
9512057
Maybe not in the purge universe, with no consequences these idiots would be a target for a lot of people
....Oh no....Why did you Invoke PETA!
9512252
I dunno i think peta would thrive in the purge universe theres no consiquence for them either. And no ones gonna think to do what they do
Oh god no... it's PETA!
Spike is 14! He may be a baby by dragon standards but he was raised by ponies and lives as a pony. Plus he is a Demi god as well. It's perfectly reasonable to have a job at 14. Even younger if it is working with family. Which technically the Library is currently a family business ran by his older sister literally out of their home.
9512313
The funny and ironic thing is... in our world, they're not even really that bad, they just get a little overenthusiastic. They still have their hearts in the right place.
In the context of this one ending line though, in Equestria, they come off as completely insensitive, bigoted, egotists that think that ponies are the only sapient race out there.
Does Ponies for the Ethical Treatment of Animals also murder millions of pets a year like ours?
PETA....really? These are people, not simple beasts. Bloody bigots....
And other news outlets are probably going to be harassing Scootaloo (if she was credited for the interview) for direct information about Rainbow and Prince.
9512338
In our world they have murdered millions of pets. They are stupid animal murderers and kill more animals than they save.
'The Spider' is also very good, not sure if anyone knows but decided to give publicity.
----
Now seriously, something is telling me that PETA is not going to be easy to take, unlike the paparazzi they are a supposed organization for the better of others.
And I just imagine when everyone is ready to fight, Fluttershy appear with a Diamond Card saying she is the president/leader or have a high position.
9512056
I swear, if they euthenise Angel bunny or any of his children both fluttershy and Rahs will ensure they never exist again. not to mention luna if she ends up getting involved.
You know, PETA on the canon Twilight early in the series would be hilarious, 'cause she'd probably go along with it until she had a breakdown.
I feel rather sorry for them in this story.
9512338
9512355
They have also created staged shock photos and videos purposely maiming and mutilating animals and saying that is was from [Insert Animal Based Product Industry Here] Like one where they should imaged of sheep purposely sheared wrong bleeding and suffering while sheep that have been sheered right are happy as all fuck to get their wool off.
9512418
Actually that image wasn't even a sheep, it was a life model mock up made of resin. That came out a bit after the ad aired. the reason they did that is because they couldn't find any one local who would sell them a lamb to use.
PETA? Meet the Sparkle family! Now start running! Discord has popcorn!
9512338
And that's why we should bust out the torches and pitchforks.
9512429
So they made a fake when they no one was stupid enough to sell them a real one to mutilate. Got it.
Oh shit Immovable Object vs Unstoppable Force time: Will Rahs be annoyed enough by PETA for a verbal beatdown? Or will His obstinate vow of silence make everyone else solve it for him!
(I personally hope the former)
Wow, that's pretty insulting calling two clearly sapient and literate individuals "animals". I wonder who's gonna be first to administer the beatings.
9512490
Yeah I mean everybody knows PETA for the stupid crap they have done over the years. Like when they killed thousands of SALT water lobsters by putting them into FRESH water or when a entire dumpster was found filled with dead animals after PETA asked for an entire shelters population.
i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/559/461/705.jpg
9512771
Except there are people who still don't know about them. It is why they pull their usualy idiocy all the time. To get coverage even when it is bad coverage because maybe someone who hasn't heard of them will look into them on the surface and like what they see without digging too deep to find the massive piles of shit they wallow in.
9512812
Yeah and because people assume you can trust something to be what it says it is they give money to PETA and then PETA can spend it doing stupid stuff like grilling a dog in Sydney.
Makes sense
Ahhh, more lambs to the slaughter
Ok so: Caiden's profile picture
And they are damn citizens not pets this is idiotic and discrimination against other species - it's like saying a griffon is a pet...
Though question is what the hay is with cows... Are they citizens, 2nd class citizens or count as animals ?
9512821
Thankfully a prop but wat in tartarus PETA ?
The problem is: activists like PETA often have 0 knowledge and common sense.
I've heard of activists releasing fur animals and them not being native to the place massive damage to local wildlife was made.
wait pony world has virson of PETA, this is not going to end well,
also do you think those who read it can figure out by last names that they related??
also why do i feel like PETA memeber are going to enrage a smart puple pony, and a pink alicorn
Long story short, Discord, you're fired! Your chaos has been outsourced to Ponyville.
9513194 all the chaos that occurs in Ponyville is probably another beyond Fluttershy Discord likes Ponyville so much